I'm so sorry...

[Sock Puppet]

...but I badly need to vent.

By now you may have twigged that this is an alias - I post a lot under a different username but am too ashamed to use said login for this post, because of the misconceptions about my illness.

I'm a psychotic, depressed, anxious, delusional, hallucinating patient. Not so long ago I was given a round of electroshock, which messed with my memory - badly. I just got the results back from a round of psychometric testing that revealed that, memory wise, I am clinically "impaired". I am currently on a cocktail of Clozapine - the strongest antipsychotic out there - Parnate - pretty much the strongest antidepressant out there - Stelazine - a powerful tranquiliser - and Epilim - a run of the mill anticonvulsant to potentiate the other medications and to help with seizures.

Things have been getting better though. You just have to fight. I have a full time job now and my symptoms - forgetting the memory problems - are pretty much under control. So things aren't totally dire.

Problem - Parnate is a trade off drug. The power it packs comes at a price. I can't eat a tonne of foodstuffs and can't take vertually any over the counter medication. This includes cheese, alcohol, soy, tofu, yeast extracts, prepared meats or fish, various vegetables and fruits... the lis is endless. Eat one of the, and I could have a stroke - thank God for the antidote I have to carry. Even more worrying is adrenaline. If I'm hit by a car and the paramedics give me a shot of it, boom! I'm in a coma.

I'm sorry guys, I guess I just need a sympathetic ear.

 

[Christine]

I'm sorry, that must be really scary. And I'm sorry more people haven't responded. It's usually better here but the boards have been so slow that posting is often difficult.

Medication is a great thing but it can often times be very dangerous. You've obviously rationalized that the trade off is worth it for you and that's good but, you're right, sometimes you just want to cry/vent/wish for everything to be average. Sometimes life can be so unfair.

 

[MedicGoofy]

I am sorry for you and how you feel. It is not easy to be going through such a thing.

However, you may want to look more into the drug that you are taking. I am familiar with it and while yes, it isn't the greatest of drugs, a lot of the foods that you have listed, it isn't that you are banned from eating them, you have to be very careful with how you eat them. You can have cheese, you can't have aged cheese. You can most certainly have chicken and fish, you just need to have fresh or frozen, as long as with frozen, they haven't gone through the aging process. And the fruits and vegetables don't seem to be an issue. I have not really heard of them being an issue, as long as you aren't eating the 'skins' of them.

And, whenever someone is on antidepressent or antipsychotic medication, you should never drink alcohol!!! It is not recommended. It changes the way the medication works. And in this case, it is the beer that is the negative.

The thing you have to worry about in your food is the tyramine. It is the same thing that some migraine sufferers have to watch. The larger the food portion is that you eat with it, the more it dilates blood vessels. Which, in your case, the cause for concern. In a migraine sufferer, the headache.

(You do realize that you have adrenaline running through your body right? What is the concern with it? Too much? We always have epinephrine. It's the flight or fight response. Our bodies can produce more of it when needed. Our adrenal gland takes care of that. If you got hit by a car, and a paramedic gave you adrenaline/epinephrine, you would be dead. That's when the give it. Unless you are having a severe anaphylatic reaction. That's it. At that point, the coma is the last thing you have to worry about)


Keep venting when you need to. Hope you start to feel better

 

[mommasita]

I am deeply sorry for everything you are going through.

I wish I could be of more help. Please know that you are more than welcome to share here, and we have a great bunch of support in our members..

Hugs to you

 

[OldBrownShoe]

Sorry to hear you are going through so much. That can't be easy. I've been on antidepressants since before I turned 21, so I've never been able to drink, either. Also, my late little sister couldn't handle Tyramine, so for years we kept that stuff out of the house and I just didn't eat it. It's hard with a lot of restrictions. I still have food allergies, so I know what it's like to go out to a restaurant with friends or coworkers only to discover you can't eat anything but a stripped down salad with oil and vinegar, not even real dressing. I can't imagine how hard it must be with all the meds you're on, and the memory problem.

It's rough and a lot of people don't understand. You seem to have a good attitude about it, though! Of course, everybody's gotta vent sometimes. I'm really amazed at how well you seem to be handling it.

 

[quasar4legs]

I cannot imagine what you have been through but anytime you want to chat feel free to come here, sometimes it just feels better to 'get it all out'.

Sending you a healing Koala Cuddle from 'down under'

 

[eternaldisneyfan]

don't be embarassed for fighting and winning some very difficult and misunderstood problems that do not get the compassion they deserve. Keep conquering. Hope every day is better and better.