If you sursprised your kids with a trip, did any of them not like being surprised?

[SEA333]

Nope! No regrets and the kids have asked us to *always* surprise them with a trip, that's how much they loved it!

We woke them up for a normal school day and had them get ready until the moment it was time to leave. DS7 actually headed to the car and we had to stop him and have the three of the sit on the couch. I usually would have been gone for work by then, but I told DD when she asked that my boss said it was OK to change my schedule that day (LOL - never once in that whole planning time did I ever have to lie to them...every single thing I said was true).

We gave them each their goody bag that we had written

"Who's got it"
"Better than us?"
"NOBODY!!!!"

and on the back:
"WE ARE"
"GOING TO"
"DISNEYWORLD!!!"

Their reaction?

"Cool" LOL DH had to tell them to open their bags.

In their bags were items for the plane/trip and their boarding passes. DS13 was the first to figure it out since the boarding pass had the date and time on it. Once he told the younger kids, they all went crazy with happiness and excitement!

So, I leaned a couple things about surprises with this:

1. It is up to the parent to figure out every little detail of the kids schedules and plan accordingly. We had a gymnastics fundraiser the day we left that the kids would miss, but there are always 3-4 a year, so I reminded them they could go next time. Missing a birthday party? Plan a special playdate for the b-day child and your child when you get home. School party? We reminded them that they have one every year but they would not be going to Disney every year, so it is OK to miss.

2. Coordinate with the teachers/coaches/etc. I did all the behind-the-scenes work with the kids' teachers, so when DS7 worried that he would miss homework, a test, etc, we had our bases covered. He was delighted to realize that all the "extra" homework he had the week before was really the stuff he was going to miss while we were gone and that Ms. Teacher was THRILLED and excited for him and wanted to hear all about the trip when we came back!

We planned the trip with the kids' football/cheer season in mind, so *just in case* one of their teams went all the way to the league superbowl, or DD's cheer team made it to State, it would not interfere with the trip. Lo and behold, DS7's team played in the Superbowl 4 days before we left! (whew!!)

3. Do not give the trip as a Christmas gift and plan to leave sometime in Feb or March. Sure, you have been planning the trip for 18 months and a couple little months more isn't so long for YOU, but to your kids it is an eternity!! Time is an untangible concept for kids, so it isn't a very cool Christmas present if they cannot have the gift until 10 weeks later! When my kids first read that they were going to WDW, their reaction was a calm "cool!". Not very emotional, not very excited. It wasn't until they realized we were leaving In 15 MINUTES!!!!!! that they went crazy.

4. Get to know what your kids want to bring on a vacation - I casually brought vacationing up to my kids in the 7 months that I was planning the trip, so I knew that DD would want to bring her stuffed bunny, and DS would want his phone and charger, and DS7 would want his stuffed dog. I made sure to pack everything that they would want to bring, then left about 15 minutes after the reveal where I said "We are leaving in 15 minutes to the airport - you may go to your room and find ONE thing that will fit in your carryon bag that you would want to bring with us" Guess what each wanted? Yep...the dog, the bunny, and the phone. Ha!!! Already packed!!! LOL

Surprises can be so much fun, but the kid has to have the right temperament for it and the parent has to be one step ahead and think of EVERYTHING. I am a pretty good event planner, LOL, so I think I did OK. The only snafu we ran into was DS13 putting off a partner assignment until the last minute for his 8th grade Spanish class, but that was because he didn't tell me about the project until the last minute (totally HIS fault...we have a strict "get the project done the FIRST weekend it is assigned" policy), so we all teamed up together when we got home to get the project done. It turned out good in the end.

ETA: Just in case anyone wonders...DS's partner ended up doing a solo project and so did DS. They both got 100% on their respective assignments.

 

[tanyaandallie]

I think so many parents expect that crazy thrilling excitement when they surprise their kids and they just do not always get. We surprised my kids when dd was in kinder and ds was probably 4. They were excited but I don't know that they really got it so they were not nearly as thrilled as we thought they would be.

That said, they are older now and have begged us to plan a surprise trip! Maybe one day.

 

[kohlby]

Our surprise trip went fine, but it wasn't totally wow. I think the kids were in shock initially. They were 8.5, 5.5, and 2.5 - so the surprise was really for the older two. We had been planning a trip for the future - but further out initially when we decided to move it up. So, they helped in the planning since we would say "when we go to Disney" and get their input. They're homeschooled, so school wasn't an issue. We didn't end Daylight Savings Time, so that was the sneakiest thing we did. We were supposed to fall back an hour on our clocks and didn't until 6 days later - we wanted them to naturally wake up early enough! (And that extra hour came in handy for sleeping one night!)

I don't think it quite sunk in until we were there - 8 hours later. But when we later asked if they wanted a surprise again, we were told maybe. And then yes, but not for Disney. And then yes, even for Disney. So, it couldn't have gone that poorly! We did a couple more surprised that trip too - we stayed onsite for the first time as a surprise. And - the biggest surprise - we went to IOA for a day, which was huge since they all love Harry Potter.

*They woke up at their normal time (well technically an hour earlier since we hadn't fallen back an hour on the clocks yet), and we told them we had a surprise for them and sat them all on the couch - while we recorded it. We gave them each an envelope The 2.5 year old opened his first - his said "how" and inside was a picture of a minivan like ours. The 5.5 year old was next, and she got "when." She had a calendar page with that day circled. The 8.5 year old had "what." He opened up a map that had the four Disney parks circled on it. The car was packed so once they figured it out, we got in the car and took off. So, it did take some time to set in.

They'll be 11, 8, and 5 for our next trip, but we're not surprising. There are so many more events to plan around now. The eldest two are both in scouts and really don't want to miss that. The eldest has a lot of trips in his scouts and I'm a Girl Scout leader so that takes planning. They all have one sport they do during the traditional school year calendar, but that's not as hard to skip. And they're making stronger friendships than they did when they were younger. The 5 year old would be easy, but the other two might not want a surprise as much as they think with all they have going on these days.

 

[BubblyTrip]

I think so many parents expect that crazy thrilling excitement when they surprise their kids and they just do not always get.

This. I watched a bunch of these videos, and I felt bad for the kids in most of them. There is rarely the level of excitement I know parents expect after all that planning and their own built up anticipation.

Many kids rely on routine for comfort, and throwing a big curveball (on video no less) is stressful. I think a surprise reveal is a great idea, but I'd do it in advance.

 

[amym2]

We haven't done the whole wake the kids up early and go to WDW thing, but we did surprise them once with a trip to Universal. A month before the trip, I made a scavenger hunt that led them to a Harry Potter puzzle that said "We're going to Universal" on the back. The trip was over Christmas break, and when DD heard when we would be gone, she cried hysterically because she wanted to be HOME for Christmas. That was a total let-down, but one I certainly should have predicted.

I agree with the others that so much of the fun is the planning. I love talking to the kids about where we'll eat, etc.

I also agree that since you are switching from WDW to DLR, you may have an initial reaction of, "But I wanted to go to WDW" even if in reality they will be perfectly happy to go to DLR.

Maybe you could surprise them ahead of time? The kids LOVED the scavenger hunt I made up. They keep asking me to make another one (and it has been 3+years) just for the fun of it. Just be prepared that even then their response may not be what you expect.

 

[Fantasmic23]

Have we not learned anything from that infamous "Dick's house" YouTube video?!?

Well-meaning mom: "We're going to Disney, baby!"

Kids: Stunned silence, as they look at their new Disney shirts with contempt.

Kid #1: "But ..."
Kid #2: "I wanted to go to Dick's house!"
Kid #3: Uncontrollably crying.
Other Adult in Background to the Mom: "I told you!"

All kidding aside, I would love to surprise my kids and I would love to be surprised with a trip myself!

 

[bjscheel]

I would tell them at least somewhat in advance. I wouldn't tell them WDW has been cancelled, that would be sad. At some point you could do a little surprise and tell them the change in plans. We did a surprise with a treasure hunt but that was 10 days out and the kids said that was perfect. It gave them some time to anticipate, plan, and pack, and be ready to miss a little school; but the trip was so much sooner than they were used to that it was super exciting still.

From reading I've done, these are the rules of thumb I've gleaned:
- Don't wake them at 4:00 am and expect instant excitement
- Don't tell them you're going some other place and then switcheroo
- Don't plan it for a time when they are going to miss something else fun and they don't have advance warning that they are going to miss it
- Tell them ahead of time if they will have any concerns about missing school
- Tell them ahead of time if you know your kid needs time to adjust to things
- Make sure they get time to pack their special things they want

 

[ConvenientTruth]

Personally I think the anticipation of a coming trip is the sweetest part!

I would never deprive my kids or anyone else of that feeling. Just like leading up to Christmas is often more fun than the morning.

I also like to get everyone's input on what they want to do or stay or eat. It is to expensive of a trip to not let everyone have a say. I wouldn't like being surprised like that and I respect my kids to not do it to them. And true they should be able to plan things around it or let people know.

Isn't the surprise of getting to go to Disney and being told you are planning a trip enough of a surprise?

This....

 

[auntiea]

Personally I think the anticipation of a coming trip is the sweetest part!

I would never deprive my kids or anyone else of that feeling. Just like leading up to Christmas is often more fun than the morning.

I also like to get everyone's input on what they want to do or stay or eat. It is to expensive of a trip to not let everyone have a say. I wouldn't like being surprised like that and I respect my kids to not do it to them. And true they should be able to plan things around it or let people know.

Isn't the surprise of getting to go to Disney and being told you are planning a trip enough of a surprise?

Agreed. On almost all counts.

I think you can surprise them with other things. Maybe do a meal with their favorite character. For example, my niece and nephews know they are going to WDW in about two weeks, but they don't know about the Lunch at the Crystal Palace with Pooh or the Pirates and Pal Fireworks cruise. I am looking forward to seeing their expressions when they learn that. I think that is a nice mix. They get to look forward to the trip, they get tell us what they want to do, help plan our trip and also get a few surprises.

 

[lovemy4sweeties]

I have 6 kids and I can't picture any of them not enjoying a surprise trip to WDW. I just asked the older 4 and they're a little confused why anyone would be upset with a surprise like that. I teach my kids to focus on the positive (like there could be a negative to WDW haha), appreciate what others do for them, roll with the punches (life lesson) and that surprises are fun (well, we teach them a lot more than that, but those are the things that relate to surprises lol). I haven't read through the post yet....I'll do that when I get a chance. Interesting topic.

 

[lovemy4sweeties]

I think if you have switched their WDW trip for a DLR trip (which is awesome too!) it would be nice to give them a little notice to ask the right questions and prepare them. If it was simply moving up a planned trip, it might be fun to surprise them.


PHXscuba

I agree with this. If they are already prepared for one trip and it is being switched to a different trip/time than I would probably tell them.

 

[lovemy4sweeties]

I've seen more of these than I can count. Saying you're going to "a" when you're really going to "b" bombs at least as often as it is met with excitement.

I agree with this too. I wouldn't create a fake trip (unless it's a trip to the grocery store haha), then do something else. I can see how that could cause some unnecessary disappointment.

 

[lovemy4sweeties]

We surprised our kids for our last trip. It involved a huge long process of stopping for fireworks in SC (what they thought was the reason for the trip), driving through the night to FL, telling the kids we were lost, bribing them to take a nap in the car the next day, ect. We woke them up as we got to the Welcome sign. DS 12 was so angry to hear we were "lost" again that he wasn't even looking around. DD 8 caught on fast and was screaming. After reassuring them that their teachers knew about the trip and missing school for a week was fine and that we did indeed have clothes to wear, they were very excited. I was worried about DD9. But later as we stood on our balcony watching the animals, she leaned over and said full of awe, "I just can't believe that we are really at Disney World." That made all my secret planning worth it. This coming trip they know about it. I may try to surprise them again at some point.

Love this!!

 

[fabulousfive]

We've always surprised our kids with a big Disney party at home one month before the trip. That way we could surprise them, yet they still took joy in some of the anticipation and packing. With that said, if they are already expecting WDW, I'm not sure how much of a surprise it'd actually be. They would most likely be a touch confused and need to get excited all over again about the new park. I would probably have a low key party and share the fun news. Maybe incorporate some things that are specific to DL to get excited about.

 

[lovemy4sweeties]

Personally I think the anticipation of a coming trip is the sweetest part!

I would never deprive my kids or anyone else of that feeling. Just like leading up to Christmas is often more fun than the morning.

I also like to get everyone's input on what they want to do or stay or eat. It is to expensive of a trip to not let everyone have a say. I wouldn't like being surprised like that and I respect my kids to not do it to them. And true they should be able to plan things around it or let people know.

Isn't the surprise of getting to go to Disney and being told you are planning a trip enough of a surprise?

Wow! Your kids would find it disrespectful if you were to plan a surprise trip to WDW for them? Respect is a big deal in our house, but finding it disrespecting when your parents plan a trip for you that some kids can only dream about is not what I would want to teach my kids. I guess to each their own. But I want my kids to appreciate everything they have and to realize they are very fortunate.

 

[lovemy4sweeties]

I do agree that the anticipation is fun and so is involving everyone in the planning. We have never surprised our kids with a trip to WDW, but we did for a few smaller trips. They love it and appreciate it either way.

 

[SEA333]

Personally I think the anticipation of a coming trip is the sweetest part!

I would never deprive my kids or anyone else of that feeling. Just like leading up to Christmas is often more fun than the morning.

I also like to get everyone's input on what they want to do or stay or eat. It is to expensive of a trip to not let everyone have a say. I wouldn't like being surprised like that and I respect my kids to not do it to them. And true they should be able to plan things around it or let people know.

Isn't the surprise of getting to go to Disney and being told you are planning a trip enough of a surprise?

Awww! Your post makes me so sad for you!

Some of the greatest things in life come as surprises

My kids absolutely loved their surprise trip, and have asked for us to surprise them again. I'm glad I am raising go-with-the-flow kind of kids who can see the positive in a surprise and he happy about it. They trust me enough as their mom (and awesome planner of stuff LOL) that I know them well enough to choose places they like to eat and things they like to do, but then again, DH and spend a LOT of time with our kids, so when planning, it was easy for me to consider their likes/dislikes. DS7 does not like seafood, so I didn't pick a seafood place. DD does not like to get splashed, so no Splash Mountain FP+ for us. It's not really that hard to plan a surprise trip when you know your kids.

I also am pretty sure my kids still feel respected LOL

To each their own, of course, but I still feel really sad for you. I'm sure your way of looking at things work for you and your family, though, even though it doesn't seem very fun to me!!

HTH

 

[Hannathy]

Awww! Your post makes me so sad for you!

Some of the greatest things in life come as surprises

My kids absolutely loved their surprise trip, and have asked for us to surprise them again. I'm glad I am raising go-with-the-flow kind of kids who can see the positive in a surprise and he happy about it. They trust me enough as their mom (and awesome planner of stuff LOL) that I know them well enough to choose places they like to eat and things they like to do, but then again, DH and spend a LOT of time with our kids, so when planning, it was easy for me to consider their likes/dislikes. DS7 does not like seafood, so I didn't pick a seafood place. DD does not like to get splashed, so no Splash Mountain FP+ for us. It's not really that hard to plan a surprise trip when you know your kids.

I also am pretty sure my kids still feel respected LOL

To each their own, of course, but I still feel really sad for you. I'm sure your way of looking at things work for you and your family, though, even though it doesn't seem very fun to me!!

HTH

this is funny because I have the most unstructured go with the flow kids I know! They had to be both cause I'm not big on routines and we traveled extensively when they were younger taking care of sick parents states away.
Never had a bedtime, forbidden foods, limits on things, etc. They could and still can sleep anywhere on anything!

I also think the ages of the kids matter. Once your kids get older they have activities and things you aren't aware of, plans they have made, projects, team things. I would never know what all I was interfering with if I didn't ask them. It is easy when they are 7 not so at 15.

 

[SEA333]

this is funny because I have the most unstructured go with the flow kids I know! They had to be both cause I'm not big on routines and we traveled extensively when they were younger taking care of sick parents states away.
Never had a bedtime, forbidden foods, limits on things, etc. They could and still can sleep anywhere on anything!

I also think the ages of the kids matter. Once your kids get older they have activities and things you aren't aware of, plans they have made, projects, team things. I would never know what all I was interfering with if I didn't ask them. It is easy when they are 7 not so at 15.

True - my kids are (almost 14), (almost) 10, and (just turned) 8...he was still 7 at the time of the trip. We did run into a small issue with DS13 and his 8th grade Spanish class project, but that was really minor and turned out fine. We are still pretty up on all activity schedules and school with them...I'm sure that would change if DS were to get a part time job in a few years or I stop being as involved in the activity planning for them, so I guess it also has a lot to do with the timing of the planned surprise as well. Maybe some families are not in the right "time" to be able to? Luckily, we were!!!

So, I agree with you, but what I do not agree with PP's on is that is DISRESPECTFUL not to tell my kids, or that I am depriving them of something by not telling them and letting them help plan. My kids actually couldn't care less about planning anything LOL so they certainly didn't feel deprived! And, if they *did*, I would feel compelled to remind them that not everyone is so LUCKY to have the means and the parents who would go to the lengths we did to plan something so fun for them that a lot of kids never, ever in their lives will get to do, and maybe they should take a few moments to think about how lucky they are to be able to go at all! Luckily for us, my kids never acted ungrateful for the trip or the surprise, so we didn't even have to go to that negative behavior modification route at all. Whew!!

I would post the video of the reveal to prove how excited and happy they were with the surprise, but I don't know how!!! LOL

 

[Fantastic4]

I would tell them since you changed locations. We surprised ours in September (at their request mind you) and they didn't believe us! To make matters worse our flight was delayed/cancelled/delayed in a tiny airport. We didn't get into Orlando until midnight when we should have been there by noon. If you decide to surprise them just be prepared for the let down for yourself if they aren't jumping up and down. We've also decided part of the excitement of going is in the preparing and planning and they didn't get to be a part of it. Either way you're going to DISNEY so even if at first they don't give you the reaction you expect/want you'll still have a great time!