I *was* FURIOUS at my DH---please send some prayers, good thoughts...

[EROS]

TONY, you won't see this post, but I could NEVER ignore you .........

 

[NHAnn]

Donna, my best to you and to your husband as you deal with this issue! Hang in there




Man, this place is BIZARRE sometimes

 

[Kama89]

Donna, I'm so sorry to hear that you and DH are going through this. My prayers are with both of you.

 

[Buckalew]

Donna, I hope he will heal quickly. My goodness, can't a body vent around here anymore? Go ahead and feel free to vent, Donna. We all need to do it.

 

[WillyJ]

I'm so sorry to hear about Tommy's injury, and I sure understand why you were intially angry. . .

I'll keep both of you in my prayers- I now you'll take good care of him and I do hope he can avoid any major surgery. .

And yes, you can always come here and vent. . . if I'd of seen this earlier you wouldn't of had to justify yourself. .

 

[EROS]

Originally posted by WillyJ
if I'd of seen this earlier you wouldn't of had to justify yourself. .

No one said that Dopey had to "justify" her anger or fury. I guess that a simply suggestion that it could be more helpful to focus upon empathy rather than rage is just totally unreasonable .

I deal with sickness 24/7. It's incredibly sad to see a family member direct hostility towards a hospitalized loved one who is ill. ........

 

[DopeyRN]

It must be so wonderful to be you EROS who never gets angry or upset. God has made you a blessing to your patients I am sure.

 

[WillyJ]

I understand Eros. . what I don't understand is why you seem to feel it's your duty to constantly challenge everyone's feelings or opinions?

You act so upset if someone dares express any kind of Christian beliefs, yet you try to jam your opinions and outlook down everyones throat over and over. .

You do not run this board, you do not have a say in how it's ran, and you are not the concious of it either. Please give it a rest, okay?

 

[EROS]

Dopey, I speak from the voice of experience. I've gotten angry at patients and regretted it later.

I can recall a 32 yr old man who underwent a mitral valve replacement for endocarditis which had resulted from his I.V. heroin abuse. Soooooooooooo, I'm making rounds one day and couldn't find him on the floor. I looked outside the window and saw him sitting with a "friend" in a car in the parking lot. Four days post open-heart surgery, he was getting a heroin fix . I laid into him when he got back to the ward and emphasized that his team was spending countless hours trying to help him STAY ALIVE!!!!!

In retrospect, I should have shown more understanding towards his desperation . He died 2 years later from an accidental narcotic overdose ...........

 

[Teejay32]

In all seriousness, why would you second-guess what you said. It seems to me to be very truthful and an objective assessment of his situation.

 

[aahmom1]

I can recall a 32 yr old man who underwent a mitral valve replacement for endocarditis which had resulted from his I.V. heroin abuse. Soooooooooooo, I'm making rounds one day and couldn't find him on the floor. I looked outside the window and saw him sitting with a "friend" in a car in the parking lot. Four days post open-heart surgery, he was getting a heroin fix . I laid into him when he got back to the ward and emphasized that his team was spending countless hours trying to help him STAY ALIVE!!!!!

Assuming you're a Dr., what pray-tell does this have to do with Donna being frustrated with her husband? HARDLY the same thing.

Donna, you come here and vent all you want. We would MUCH rather hear you vent than hear Eros talk about God.

 

[EROS]

Teejay, I've come to accept that addictions like smoking, booze, drugs, eating, etc are life-threatening disorders which demand our empathy. I don't think that we should "enable" such patients, but I DO feel that they DON'T deserve to be "lambasted" for their poor self-care.

I've had SEVERAL patients become H.I.V Positive after we had talked incessantly about safe sex practices as well as the risk posed by I.V. substance abuse. When I found out that they had become infected, I cried for them................. no anger..........just overwhelming sadness ..........

 

[EROS]

Originally posted by aahmom1
what pray-tell does this have to do with Donna being frustrated with her husband?

You don't "get it", but that's OK .......

 

[Teejay32]

Originally posted by EROS
Teejay, I've come to accept that addictions like smoking, booze, drugs, eating, etc are life-threatening disorders which demand our empathy. I don't think that we should "enable" such patients, but I DO feel that they DON'T deserve to be "lambasted" for their poor self-care.

I've had SEVERAL patients become H.I.V Positive after we had talked incessantly about safe sex practices as well as the risk posed by I.V. substance abuse. When I found out that they had become infected, I cried for them................. no anger..........just overwhelming sadness ..........

I'm curious to know what the line is between truth and lambasting. I don't know it myself. I can see people being angry...not sure if my doctor would be 'angry' but maybe exasperated or frustrated...does anyone else have a 'right' to care about the state of someone's health?

I'd rather see this a separate topic though and not related to anyone's thread. It's interesting.

 

[CRB#33]

Donna, I had missed this until today. You have every right to be angry in your marraige. Your anger is out of loving, caring, and fear for your husband. No one has any right to judge you for that.

I hope he is feeling better soon and you too! {{{hugs}}} and prayers to you both.

 

[MaryAnnDVC]

Originally posted by WillyJ
I understand Eros. . what I don't understand is why you seem to feel it's your duty to constantly challenge everyone's feelings or opinions?

You act so upset if someone dares express any kind of Christian beliefs, yet you try to jam your opinions and outlook down everyones throat over and over. .

You do not run this board, you do not have a say in how it's ran, and you are not the concious of it either. Please give it a rest, okay?

OMG, I just had a rush of overwhelming admiration and gratitude for a moderator!!!! Praise the Lord! And thank you, WillyJ!!!

(Oh, and Donna? Vent away...it pisses me off too when people I love don't take care of themselves...I may not show them (altho I do try to wake them up a bit to the choices they make!), but it is a release to be able to express that PART of all the emotions here, isn't it? )

 

[EROS]

I would agree, MaryAnn, Willy is a pretty good guy .

Gee, I don't think that I mentioned GOD one time on this thread.....................I MUST be slipping.

 

[LucyStorm]

The fact that you are angry at DH is in direct proportion to how much you care about him. If you didn't care, you wouldn't care enough to be angry.

And I'm sorry, but if DH does something stupid consciously that has an impact on all of our lives, he needs to be taken to task for it.

 

[EROS]

Of course, it's always helpful in life to turn the tables.

If Dopey was somewhat overweight and ruptured a disc while getting out of bed, would the DIS be so supportive of her DH if he exclaimed his "fury" and "anger" and "wish to go up and punch her"?????

 

[LucyStorm]

as long as he didn't actually punch her, I believe we would. Venting is a healthy thing, especially if it allows someone to get their frustration out and not actually act out.

People need not to be enabled to continue poor choices, whatever they may be. You can still show empathy while enlightening someone to the consequences of their poor choices.

Would that we were all perfect, then there would be no *******.