i never know how to answer DD

[Marla Hellwig]

when she asks - "Mom - why do family members I love have to die?"

 

[glo]

{{{HUGS}}} Those are the hardest questions to answer

 

[cgcw]

My DS3 continues to ask why his Grampie had to go to heaven and how he's going to get out of "that hole" and back to his real house. It's been almost 3 months since he passed away. It's always hard and always the same answers. I know he doesn't understand -- heck, we don't always either. I'm just hoping that eventually he'll accept the answers we give him (his brain was very sick, Jesus wanted him to live with him, he's not sick anymore, etc) and stop asking.

I know it's tough.

 

[Scratch42]

Heaven is missing an Angel so they had to take their place.

It's one of the worst subjects to deal with.


{{{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}

Scratch

 

[snuggles]

Hugs Marla. Questions like that are awful to answer. Shes just missing her Grandpa and needs some assurance from you. Give her a big hug from me.

 

[janette]

How hard for both of you I'm fortunate that my girls haven't lost anyone close to them. I know that day may come and it will be a very hard thing to try to help them deal with loss.

 

[imgoingtodisney]

DS lost one grandfather (my dad) when he was 2, the other when he was 4 (FIL). Im hoping real hard that by the end of today he wont be needing to attend his Uncle's (my brothers) funeral. (DS will be 11 in 3 days)
We did stop at my father's grave when we were in Salem the other day, thought it would be too hard to stop there today.
When my dad died in 94 we needed to pickout a cemetary, coffin, plot, etc. My mother did buy a family plot for 4 so that decision is done for them, thank God.

I remember going to my cousins - she was 10, I was 11. It was a very difficult funeral/wake because of our ages.

 

[Robinrs]

Aww, Marla:

My son has lost 5 people in his life in the last two years. Alot for a 10 year old.

His attitude is that he looks forward to seeing them again one day. He speaks to their spirits and tells me that he's so glad that they are ALWAYS with him now.

I never understood the saying "its better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all" until recently. My first son died at three days but those three days made me who I am today. My Dad always told me that your last day is decided before you are born. Even though we don't understand why they're gone that their lives always meant something and the love we have for them will NEVER die.

Hold onto her, show her by example that the legacy of those who are gone has to live on in the ones who are still here.

God bless,

Robinrs

 

[dianeschlicht]

That's a tough one. When DS was 8, his Great Grandpa whom he shared a birthday with passed away. DS insisted he didn't want to go to the wake. My DM told him she would take him over before anyone else arrived so if he was afraid he would cry, it would be all right. He went reluctantly with her, and when he came back, he was happy as a clam! I asked what made the difference. He said he was afraid it was going to be just his bones! Kids get strange ideas. From that point on, DS would NOT celbrate his birthday alone. For those 8 years, he always had a joint birthday with his "Bop", and after "Bop" died, he insisted that he celebrate his birthday on the same day as his sister, whos birthday is 3 days before his. He is now 27 and still celebrates his birthday with his older sister!

 

[Tony-NJ]

dear! That has to be one of the toughest questions to answer.

 

[Marla Hellwig]

I just hate to see my dd hurting - she has had so many deaths in her short life to deal with - but guess that is how life goes - sigh

 

[bsnyder]

Marla, hugs to you and Kara!