I need to have a "Poor Me" Moment.....

[nativetxn]

Sometimes life just isn't fair, huh? I have been in your position, not as a single mom but as the wife of a very poor student. It's disappointing when life throws obstacles in the way of our fun.

Sorry you are having car troubles. As disappointed as you are to have to cancel your trip, just imagine if it had happened after you had <i>taken</i> your trip, you would really be strapped.

I hope things get better and you can start saving for another trip soon.

Katholyn

 

[stego]

I hope that in here, you find friendship and comfort, from people who care while still going on with life, in general.
I personally think it's pretty neat to have a place to come to where we can share openly about Life. And just a click away, we can read about other's experience at the "world". I have been indeed fortunate enough to have that opportunity back in 2001.

I understand what you mean about upgrading to concierge, and moving up to deluxe. We both realize that some people don't live in your financial situation. It's not their fault, it's more of that we should be able to share our concerns, whatever they may be. I don't think it's necassarily one concern means more than the other. Weighing single parenting against upgrading to concierge-well, that's pretty mindless.

I do understand your situation. I lived it. I'm not in it right now-in fact, far from it. I thought I would just share with you my experience with hope. Some years ago I was a single dad with no job, my truck payments were 3 months behind, and I had borrowed a quadzillion dollars from my mom for the custody battle, and to rent a small apartment. All of a sudden, I had custody of a 15 month old baby. My life was in ruins. My heart was broken, and I was, by all means, defeated. My son looked to me-yes, even at 15 months old-as the example. I trudged, day by day, towards that happiness. My life wasn't about upgrading to concierge-it was raiding the change jar so I could take my son to McDonald's for a happy meal on the weekend, and so I could get the $2.99 special. Maybe rent a video for me. I always loved taking him to his mother's house to visit in a new outfit that I had saved for-and never see it again. I learned. I can understand you are in a place where you're just going day by day. I knew that I had to look deep down inside for the "gifts". Now by no means am I upgrading to concierge right now, but things are a lot better financially. I had to have the attitude of changing; and I don't mean just financially. I also had to realize, it would take time. It was quite some time before I could take a weekend trip-just like you are wanting to take. My ex took everything-furniture-you name it. Even the darn showerhead and lightbulbs from the house we were renting! (I had to pay to replace those) and clean up the mess she left (and my life). It was hard, doing that, with a house full of memories from my son's first year. But I asked for help, and a close friend came to help me-took time away from his wife and children to help a "sick" friend. Indeed, I was spiritually sick, and was hanging on by a thread. But, you know, I kept plugging away. I had to find it deep down inside of me. Not because someone told me I should, but because I wanted to. And you can too. I hope that you will find the happiness with your daughter, and the life that you so truly deserve.
God bless you,
Fred

 

[Beauty]

Wow Fred! I so admire you! Congratulations, you deserve everything you have where you are right now.


I have been in your situation as well Sweetie, with the one exception that my DH and I have always been together. We got pregnant before he even graduated high school. The first apartment we had left us exactly $50 dollars a month after the bills were paid. John had gotten a job in a factory (the only place that would hire him) and the pay was awful. We were never together because he worked at nights and slept during the day. I was a 20 year old with a baby that I had no idea what to do with. All my friends were going out and I was stuck at home. My mom and dad gave us so much money! Vacations weren't even thought of. We ate sandwiches, PB and J, Roman Noodles and at times had nothing and would depend on my parents. It was a miracle that John and I stayed together through those times.

But I am here to say that it can get better. For the past 5 years things have looked up and we are finally at a place where we have been working our entire marriage to get to. Believe me we DO NOT have conceirge but we can go on vacation and stay somewhere UNDER $100 dollars per night. I am envious of people who can stay at the Grand Floridian or Concerige but I am THANKFUL for what God has chosen to give me which is a wonderful husband and a healthy son!!


Just hand in there, put your faith and trust in God and thank him for the healthy DD that you have. Good Luck!

 

[Blondie]

Wow Fred, you are certainly an inspiration to others! It's no wonder with that great attitude of yours that things turned out better for you and your child!

I knew that I had to look deep down inside for the "gifts".

Indeed, there are "gifts" all around us!

Sweetie, I hope things turn around for you soon. Is there an extra job you could take while your DD sleeps? Do you have anyone that can watch her while you do that, maybe a parent or sibling? Cleaning, stocking at stores, etc. are some of the options that may be open to you to bring in more income.

Hang in there!

 

[Pin Wizard]

I'm sorry you had to cancel your trip, Sweetie. I'm right there with you!! I'm a single mom NOT working right now. After 8 years at a dead end job I'm back in school. I would LOVE to take advantage of going to Disney 7 days for the price of 4 but can't swing it. The van needs work that I've been putting off. Still not sure when that will be done. So we're home ALL summer.

 

[nuke]

Fred your story brought tears to my eyes. What a great dad you are and what a great hang in there attitude!

 

[Beauty]

Another wonderful idea is ebay. People will buy ANYTHING!! I'm sure your DD outgrows clothes....put them on ebay...You would really be surprised what you can get out of things that mean nothing to you!!

 

[marlasmom]

This post is not going to be popular but your post gave rise to strong feelings in me. First of all, why did you cry for an hour and a half. Certainly not productive and not a good example for your daughter. There are a number of people on this board who have NEVER been to Disney. There are also a number of people on this board who have real problems - sick children, terminal parents and the list goes on and on.

Secondly how can you save dollars for a vacation when you are two payments behind on your credit card. This strikes me as downright irresponsible. I believe that when you are late with a credit card payment you are subject to late fees and horrendous interest rates. It seems to me that this type of action has probably contributed to the fix you find yourself in.

A number of people have told you that they have been in your situation and by dint of very hard work have pulled themselves out. You can too. So you can't go on vacation. So what! You can rent a video and make popcorn, you can go to a park, maybe to a museum.

Someone suggested taking a second job. There were other very good suggestions made to you. Try to take advantage of them.

You do have a computer and you are not a newbie judging from your posts about exchanges. Try the rewards programs and maybe you can get something toward a vacation.

 

[Serena]

Marlasmom, you sound like my mom's family. thank you. I miss them.

There's nothing like a reality check when you are feeling bad about things.
Your reply will help me as well.

 

[Deb in IA]

*stands and applauds marlasmom*

 

[Beauty]

Barbara you certainly put things in perspective!

 

[montessori]

Originally posted by marlasmom
"This post is not going to be popular but your post gave rise to strong feelings in me. First of all, why did you cry for an hour and a half. Certainly not productive and not a good example for your daughter. There are a number of people on this board who have NEVER been to Disney. There are also a number of people on this board who have real problems - sick children, terminal parents and the list goes on and on.

Secondly how can you save dollars for a vacation when you are two payments behind on your credit card. This strikes me as downright irresponsible. I believe that when you are late with a credit card payment you are subject to late fees and horrendous interest rates. It seems to me that this type of action has probably contributed to the fix you find yourself in.

A number of people have told you that they have been in your situation and by dint of very hard work have pulled themselves out. You can too. So you can't go on vacation. So what! You can rent a video and make popcorn, you can go to a park, maybe to a museum." ....

Thank you for saying what I wanted to say, Marlasmom.


Count your blessings instead of your crosses;
Count your gains instead of your losses.
Count your joys instead of your woes;
Count your friends instead of your foes.
Count your smiles instead of your tears;
Count your courage instead of your fears.
Count your full years instead of your lean;
Count your kind deeds instead of your mean.
Count your health instead of your wealth;
Love your neighbor as much as yourself.
Author Unknown

 

[phamton]

I don't understand some of these replies. There is always someone that has it worse off than you but that doesn't make your disappointments insignificant.

I have no doubt that many of you have had to cancel a trip to WDW and it was disappointing. Some of you may have even cried. Frustration will do that no matter how insignificant the problem may seem to others.

My uncle and aunt had 3 children. The oldest son died of Cystic Fibrosis at the age of 13. Their youngest daughter died of colon cancer at 25 years old. So all they had left was their middle child. He married and had an excellent chemical engineering job and two lovely children. He lost his job, started drinking heavily, divorced, and last month one of his two children commited suicide at age 14 years. This family has gone through unbelievable tragedy. And now my aunt has breast cancer and lupus. I love them and feel great sorrow for what they have gone though and are still going through.

But a few months ago when we were selling our house, it fell through on the closing date and, yes, I cried. To me, it was a major disappointment, obviously not a tragedy, but still sad for me. Should I have felt guilty for being depressed because others had worse problems? Compassion for others is a virtue I strive for. I don't ever want to poo-poo someone else's disappontment.

I'm sorry ~Sweetie~ for your cancelled trip. I know it is depressing but hang in there. You'll get through it and be a stronger person because of it, I just know you will.

Bev

 

[Buckalew]

Since reading the board & reading Dan's welcome thread, I see you don't have a dd but instead a son. Are you sure you all are too girly-girly to camp? Honestly, my DD loves it. I don't but I still go. but, I'm guessing if you try it again this year, that your son may like it better than the dd did.

I'm sorry you feel like the advice you have gotten hasn't helped or made you feel welcomed. I think it is good advice coming from many people who have been there and done that. You know the old saying--if life gives you lemons, make lemonade? It probably applies to a situation such as this.

I think we can all sympathize with your disappointment. I think you had some good suggestions on the thread to help you over the disappointment.

 

[marlasmom]

Buckalew you are so wise.

 

[preshi]

Wait her daughter turned into a boy?

interesting

 

[Beauty]

Yep....and in this thread she calls her and her daughter girly girls and thats why she can't go camping.

I'm really really confused.

 

[dtuleya]

I think one of the important things is the title of the thread "I need to have a "Poor Me" Moment...." I think what Sweetie was trying to do is vent her frustrations. She obviously just needed a shoulder to cry on. I know that I've had these moments. It doesn't mean I'm right or wrong, just that I'm human.

 

[Pete's Mom]

Sorry guys, I would nix the second job idea if it meant spending less time with her child and having to hire a sitter. JMHO!