I need some clarity!

[pigletgirl]

So, today I was with a friend picking up her little brother from middle school and I was totally entertained by the middle schoolers!! And at the same time, the kids seemed super duper mean. They were acting so disrespectful and hateful towards others who maybe were a little different. That really bothered me.

So, I wanna ask you all.........
Why is it cool in the social realm to be mean?

Why are kids who are nice get put down?

Why in the world can there not be any individuality?

And I know its a hard time of life, but I truly wanna know!!

BTW......as you get older the nicer you are = more friends FYI.

 

[cindys_castle2011]

Why is it cool in the social realm to be mean?
Ahh, I guess cause one kid comes in being mean, then another follows, then another, so on and so on..

Why are kids who are nice get put down?
Because they are different and unique. Apparently in middle school AND high school it's like against the law to be different.. yet on every girls myspace they're like 'I'm different from any girl you'll ever meet.' Then they go to school the next morning, picking on some kid who isn't wearing American Eagle, Hollister, etc.

Why in the world can there not be any individuality?
There actually can be. Only the people who don't care, like REALLY don't care what others think, can be individuals.

People like this, like your talking about, piss me off! I always hated seeing kids get picked on in school. I hated all the drama. Number one reason I got homeschooled.

I actually see myself as WAY more mature than my friends, mainly because I don't go to school.

But.. like my sister's boyfriend's little sister for example.

She is like the most GORGEOUS girl! She has baby blues, and long straight blonde hair. And you know what.. she gets picked on because she's 'to' skinny! She's like really little for her age. She's about to be 14 and weighs like 90 something lbs.

I'm just waiting for her puberty to start.. and she's gonna shoot up.. (her parents, and brother are over 6'1") she's gonna gain weight.. mainly in the chest area, ha. And she is gonna be the most beautiful girl once she gets older.

All the girls in her grade pick on her cause she can't fit into Hollister, and American Eagle. It's so sickening. I can't wait till they get older! It'll be like a big slap in their faces, when all the guys start going after her!

Ah, okay rant done. See what you've started now Im heated. lol. xD

 

[Sparx]

i thought being mean to others was only cool in the 7th grade?

 

[pigletgirl]

i thought being mean to others was only cool in the 7th grade?

7th grade is like the epitome of middle school rudeness.....

But....c'mon people!!!

I wanna know!!!!

 

[Ms.Squeakers]

Ugh.
I may never know, I asked my parents those questions EVERY. DAY. for the past 2 years.

Except not as much in 7th grade as I did in 8th grade, because for some reason, the class above me was really nice. No, "YOU SUCK, GO DIE", more "Hey wanna hang out this weekend?"

It was weird.
Then in 8th grade I was stuck with my own grade for the entire year. I seriously went nuts. I had to see a therapist. People were SO rude for no reason at all. I tried and tried and TRIED to be nice.

Middle school is impossible.

BUT I survived.

I'm so glad to be in high school. Everyone in band is SO nice. They're excited and don't dread what they do at all. (which Middle School band was FULL of dread.)


and, I am one of the few people in this WORLD who REFUSE to by clothing from AE, Hollister, Ambercrombie, whatever those stores are called...pac sun?

 

[jbcheerchick93]

i think the reason we're mean is because if we are beign mean about someone, then the people that we are being mean with, arent talking about us. its a comfort. but what they dont realize is that every single person talks about the mean ones

 

[BabyPiglet]

Middle and High school are just things and experiences people have to go through, I guess. It's unfortunate. Especially because now people are just so nice and welcoming, but when I tell someone in high school that, they can't believe it.

Kids in high school/middle school don't think it will get better, but seriously, it will. College is completely different. The people are all unique, sweet, and talkative.

I wish kids could realize that wearing the most expensive clothes and being mean won't really help them later in life.

 

[imabrat]

A lot of people learn it from their parents. The generations before us were/are particularly judgemental. A child will repeat anything their parents say because in their eyes, their parents know all and are right. A classic example is "I overheard my mommy talking, and my mommy said your mommy is a fat cow!". Or, if mommy says "*insertprofanityhere*", the child is going to repeat that profanity.

Another reason is that it helps people feel better about themselves. They think, "Oh, well at least I'm not as unfortunately looking as Sally Sue!".

Finally, girls are just cruel. Particularly teenage girls, but all females are cruel. The drama never stops, from the nursery school to the workplace to the assisted living care facility. I'm beginning to think it's just our nature, no matter how hard we try to stop it it always slips out.

 

[3mtn-kate]

A lot of people learn it from their parents. The generations before us were/are particularly judgemental. A child will repeat anything their parents say because in their eyes, their parents know all and are right. A classic example is "I overheard my mommy talking, and my mommy said your mommy is a fat cow!". Or, if mommy says "*insertprofanityhere*", the child is going to repeat that profanity.

Another reason is that it helps people feel better about themselves. They think, "Oh, well at least I'm not as unfortunately looking as Sally Sue!".

Finally, girls are just cruel. Particularly teenage girls, but all females are cruel. The drama never stops, from the nursery school to the workplace to the assisted living care facility. I'm beginning to think it's just our nature, no matter how hard we try to stop it it always slips out.

That sucks.....like a lot. I mean I agree, there will always be those women that are only in it for themselves and are just mean but I don't think it's fair to assume that all women are cruel. JMO.

 

[MickeyisBeast]

I'm going into 8th grade... so I can help clear things up...

Why is it cool in the social realm to be mean?

It's how kids fit in. Especially in Middle School. It makes them feel better. It helps their self-esteem.

Why are kids who are nice get put down?

Because (most of the time) they're kids who people dont want to hang out with. It's sad, but it's the truth :[

Why in the world can there not be any individuality?

Because then you'd be different. Some people dont like to be different/stand out. It's there personalities. Or because they'd get made fun of for being different. Again, it's sad.

I hope that helped... the truth is... kids are mean... especially girls... teenage girls.

 

[SKJA124]

Why is it cool in the social realm to be mean?
Ahh, I guess cause one kid comes in being mean, then another follows, then another, so on and so on..

Why are kids who are nice get put down?
Because they are different and unique. Apparently in middle school AND high school it's like against the law to be different.. yet on every girls myspace they're like 'I'm different from any girl you'll ever meet.' Then they go to school the next morning, picking on some kid who isn't wearing American Eagle, Hollister, etc.

Why in the world can there not be any individuality?
There actually can be. Only the people who don't care, like REALLY don't care what others think, can be individuals.

People like this, like your talking about, piss me off! I always hated seeing kids get picked on in school. I hated all the drama. Number one reason I got homeschooled.

I actually see myself as WAY more mature than my friends, mainly because I don't go to school.

But.. like my sister's boyfriend's little sister for example.

She is like the most GORGEOUS girl! She has baby blues, and long straight blonde hair. And you know what.. she gets picked on because she's 'to' skinny! She's like really little for her age. She's about to be 14 and weighs like 90 something lbs.

I'm just waiting for her puberty to start.. and she's gonna shoot up.. (her parents, and brother are over 6'1") she's gonna gain weight.. mainly in the chest area, ha. And she is gonna be the most beautiful girl once she gets older.

All the girls in her grade pick on her cause she can't fit into Hollister, and American Eagle. It's so sickening. I can't wait till they get older! It'll be like a big slap in their faces, when all the guys start going after her!
Ah, okay rant done. See what you've started now Im heated. lol. xD

Wow. I almost flipped over when you said that.
That girl sounds exactly like me [just switch the blonde hair to brown.]
People are always taunting me and just COMPARING themselves to me because I'm 15 and weigh little over 90 pounds. And it drives me crazy!
I always say, "We're two different people with different genetic backgrounds; you can't keep saying you're fat just because I'm not!" [Most of my friends are moderate, and not fat AT ALL!] But ugh. I hate it.

But I think that girl cruelty has something to do with being insescure, for girls and guys [although I believe it's more with girls than guys..], because if you taunt someone different than you, #1 it gives you somewhat a greater level of "dominance" I suppose you could say, making you feel in control , and #2 it can make you feel better about yourself, as other people have said.
This is just my opinion..

 

[Raven_the_Bird]

I don't really know how to answer those questions but...I hated middle school. In science (in 7th grade) we went through like, over five subs (the teacher quit for a different job in the middle of the year) 4th/5th period made two of them cry/quit...my sister said something like that happened when she went to that school, and that middle school kids are the worst.

I'm so glad I go to school online now.

 

[imabrat]

That sucks.....like a lot. I mean I agree, there will always be those women that are only in it for themselves and are just mean but I don't think it's fair to assume that all women are cruel. JMO.

Maybe not, but I doubt there are many women on this planet that haven't thought/said something bad about someone at one point in their lives. I know I have. Not enough to bully someone but I have made fun of someone. People have made fun of me too, so it's even.

 

[kelly7ak]

People will typically criticize others when they don't understand what those others are all about. Sometimes it's out in the open, sometimes it's behind your back, said in whispers, etc. People join in with other people because they "want to belong", and if making fun of others is a part of that game, then they'll join in.

And if you read anything on the CB on here, you'll see that it's not limited to middle-schoolers.

 

[pigletgirl]

I'm going into 8th grade... so I can help clear things up...

Why is it cool in the social realm to be mean?

It's how kids fit in. Especially in Middle School. It makes them feel better. It helps their self-esteem.

Why are kids who are nice get put down?

Because (most of the time) they're kids who people dont want to hang out with. It's sad, but it's the truth :[

Why in the world can there not be any individuality?

Because then you'd be different. Some people dont like to be different/stand out. It's there personalities. Or because they'd get made fun of for being different. Again, it's sad.

I hope that helped... the truth is... kids are mean... especially girls... teenage girls.

A - Thats horrible. But I guess everyone in middle school has super low self esteem.
B - Why don't people want to hang out with the nice kids? They don't even give them the chance. Again,

Yep, and the funny thing about this whole thing is that I think I was one of the mean ones, but I have blocked it out of my mind, so I can't really remember much of it.
And now I feel awful about how I treated others. It makes me sick inside.

 

[MickeyisBeast]

A - Thats horrible. But I guess everyone in middle school has super low self esteem.
B - Why don't people want to hang out with the nice kids? They don't even give them the chance. Again,

Yep, and the funny thing about this whole thing is that I think I was one of the mean ones, but I have blocked it out of my mind, so I can't really remember much of it.
And now I feel awful about how I treated others. It makes me sick inside.

I know, it really really is. It's so sad.
Some kids are just big meanies and dont give others a chance to 'shine'

I wouldn't say I am one of the mean ones, but I'm not exactly nice... When you have your group of friends, you stay with them and don't feel like you need anyone else in your 'group'.

It's insanely sad and wrong. But kids have low self-esteem and they feel better by making others feel worse. I think its the worse with that kind of stuff in MS... but I heard its also like that in HS... just a little bit better.

 

[m!ssemmx0]

I'm one of the "different" ones, and surprisingly, I haven't been made fun of much...except this one time in freshman year (last year), these two guys made fun of me behind my back and said that I couldn't walk or talk just because I'm different. I've learned to just take those kind of people with a grain of salt and ignore mean comments. I've also learned not to worry about other people's opinions, and just stick with the nice people, because they won't judge me.

 

[Fatphil32]

Why are kids who are nice get put down?

Because they are different and unique. Apparently in middle school AND high school it's like against the law to be different.. yet on every girls myspace they're like 'I'm different from any girl you'll ever meet.' Then they go to school the next morning, picking on some kid who isn't wearing American Eagle, Hollister, etc.

lmfao so true.

lol most people at my school have drifted away from picking on other kids. The ones that do it are the same ones that also go around like badasses and talk behind all their own friends behind their backs. I found being nice = impressing the non-crazy girls. I'm different from most people as in my personality sometimes, but I'm also just like almost all my friends at the same time, so I haven't ever really been picked on.

 

[3mtn-kate]

Maybe not, but I doubt there are many women on this planet that haven't thought/said something bad about someone at one point in their lives. I know I have. Not enough to bully someone but I have made fun of someone. People have made fun of me too, so it's even.

True I agree, I'm guilty of that too.

 

[Sparx]

A - Thats horrible. But I guess everyone in middle school has super low self esteem.
B - Why don't people want to hang out with the nice kids? They don't even give them the chance. Again,

Yep, and the funny thing about this whole thing is that I think I was one of the mean ones, but I have blocked it out of my mind, so I can't really remember much of it.
And now I feel awful about how I treated others. It makes me sick inside.

i was one of the bullied ones, and i never forgot a single word a single person ever said to me. i'm glad you were able to block it, becuase sometimes it still eats at me.