I need ideas, This is tough

[Spinning]

As some of you know I have a dear friend who is dying of cancer. The cancer has spread to her brain. so we are limited on time unless a miricle happens.
She asked me to help her make journals for her kids. At first I thought she was talking about scrapping past events but she is more interested in the future.
Journals she creates or tapes to give her kids when they graduate from high school, weddings, and other major events.
So how would you do this?
I know a video would be good but I don't think that is what she wants. Any ideas?
I thought maybe create empty scrap pages with the elements and some of her thoughts put down on paper. Then the family or friends could add pictures as the events happen.
Thanks everyone

 

[bananiem]

I'm so sorry! I remember you posting about her before. It breaks my heart when a parent has to leave a child too soon. You are a wonderful friend for helping her get this in order.
I think your idea is great. They'd have the pictures right along with their mother's words. Another thing is to write letters for each event that a designated person would deliver. I'm thinking a letter for when they start to date, before starting high school, etc. Maybe she could put in their what she hopes they will experience as well as putting down what SHE experienced. Sometimes I think we worry aobut giving the advice that we forget that the child may want to know how we felt at a certain age. There are lots of things I wish I could have asked my grandma. Maybe she could do a journal of her favorite things.
ann

 

[kaekae]

How about some mini albums?? Have one ready for wedding, for example, with some thoughts, experiences and maybe pictures of her own wedding?? Same sort of stuff for births and graduation...

or if she doesn't want to do photo's she could still do the mini books but with journalling inside. Hopes, dreams, advice & love packed into a little book that can be given to them on those special days.

That way when those events happen in the future, the family she left behind will have a piece of her to share in the event.
Each mini album could have an envelope with a short letter hand written by her.

Please tell her for me, it's a blessing just to simply hear her story. What an incrediable mother, who thinks of her family and children in a time such as this. I'll keep her and her family in my prayers.

 

[mommytotwo]

I would put together small boxes-like shoe boxes and have them gift wrapped according to the occasion with the name of the recipent. Then they have a gift from their mom to open for that occassion. She could put in a special gift just from her-maybe different charms for each occassion so that her kids have something that can always wear and cherish. A note of encouragement from her to her children or a wish of congratulations.
You are such a good friend to help her out like this and I'm sure her kids will also be thankful as well.

 

[mishoe01]

I love the box idea that mommytotwo gave.

The only idea I came up with is to have your friend record some things to say to the kids as they get older. I'd still recommend the letters, but especially if she doesn't want to do videos, then this way the kids would still have something with her voice on them.

Hope this helps and prayers for you, your friend, and her family.

 

[TN Traveler]

Boy, this is tough. I remember watching 20/20, 60 mins or one of those News Magazine shows where a lady was dying from breast cancer and wanted to leave messages to her then 5 yr old daughter. It was simple stuff like how to put on make-up properly, cooking one of her favorite dishes...you know every day things that I call my mom for w/o even thinking about it.

I like all of the ideas suggested especially the boxes. I also like the idea of recording instructions or messages. That way the kids can hear her voice. How many times have I heard people say "If I could just hear her voice again"?? How old are her children? Things like tips on dating...if she has a son maybe she can tell him about her first date w/his father. or how a gentleman is suppose to treat a lady (open doors, walking on the outside of the sidewalk etc). I also like the idea of the charms or little gifts saved to give to her children on their special days.
My mother's mother had a stroke when Mom was 17 and died when Mom was 20. So many times I think about how grateful I am to have my mother to ask questions.

I'll lift your friend up in prayer and ask God to give her wisdom, comfort and understanding. Also for her children, husband and very special wonderful friends like you.

Karen

 

[Cruise04]

I like the idea of the boxes and recordings also and you could tie those two together - have a recording that will go in the specific box.

Even if the box just contained a $1 bill for a birthday or a special occasion with a recording would be so meaningful in my eyes.

I'm also very sorry about your friend. You ARE wonderful for helping her with this.

 

[Swan]

I really think having her voice recorded is so important. When my father-in-law died I took our answering machine and tape and put it up in a plastic bag. A year later (we could not at first) we enjoyed listening to his voice.

 

[Spinning]

Thanks so much for all of your input and advice. I am going to sit down with her and go over some of these ideas. I plan to buy some of those scrap book buttons. I made her a scrap book from our trip to Disney in April and left places for her to write her thoughts but she hasn't yet so maybe the buttons will be easier.
I love the present idea.
My mom gave me perils that were from my dad. He died 6 months earlier and they are so special for to me. I know he didn't pick them out but I know he would have!
Thanks everyone!