I have no idea where to post this,

[iwish81792]

so I guess here is as good as any!

I've been a huge Disney fan as long as I can remember. I got it from my dad, who is almost (ALMOST.) as fanatic as I am, even in his fifties, when most of our family thinks he should have grown out of it thirty years ago.

The issue I'm having is that my father is very apprehensive about going to Disney for the sole reason of me bringing my girlfriend. When our tentative trip rolls around she and I will be eighteen and seventeen, respectively. We've been dating for about a year and a half and she's basically merged completely into my family and vice versa. The two of them get along great. Honestly I think she tries a little too hard to please him, but that's another story.

When discussing plans for the trip (that I would be footing most of bill for, helloooo!) and I mentioned bringing her along, he suddenly got chilly and changed his mind, saying "Maybe this year wouldn't be such a good time to go after all." Now, she would pay for her own tickets and even offered to pay for all of the food for herself, my father, my brother and I, so it's not a question of money. When I questioned him further, he said he wasn't sure if WDW was "ready" for two lesbian teens running around the parks. In his defense, we are affectionate. We hold hands constantly and give little pecks on the cheek. If we're in the privacy of a home we'll obviously be a little more lovey dovey, but we know to keep it cool in public.

I don't know how to explain all of this to him. I tried talking about Gay Days and how GLBT couples are the same as heterosexual couples no matter the setting, but I don't know how to knock it into his thick skull that it's not a matter of your partner, but knowing when to tone down the PDA.


...in short? HELP.

 

[Timon-n-Pumbaa Fan]

If your Dad has any concerns about Disney being an accepting place in respect to the GLBT community, he should have no fear. A very large number of the CM's are a member of our community. My partner and I have taken 7 trips to WDW together and have been very pleased with the CM's treatment of us. There is little doubt that we are lesbians, not that we advertise, but it's obvious.

If your Dad is concerned about the whole PDA aspect, well, I can understand. I don't mind seeing anyone holding hands at the parks. I don't mind seeing a quick peck on the cheek kiss even. I just don't care to see people hanging all over each other, playing tonsil hockey, or worse. I don't care what sexual orientation it is that's going overboard in the PDA, I am with your Dad, it's inappropriate in public.

If your Dad is concerned about how other people (park guests) are going to treat you, then he needs to understand that people in the parks, for the most part are so blinded by pixie dust, that they can't even notice that they are cutting in front of someone in a wheelchair. If you are not going overboard on the PDA or intentionally dressing to draw attention to yourself, like wearing a shirt that says something like, "Local Lesbian Legend", not that I have ever owned or worn such a shirt , then you really shouldn't be targeted by the masses.

If your Dad was just wanting to spend one last vacation with his kids before you all are scattered to the four corners of the world, then I can also understand his desire to go with you and your brother without your GF tagging along. Sometimes, Dads need that last blast of being your parent, the most loved person in your life, and your hero. If he needs that, then ditch the GF, you won't ever regret having spent more time with your father.

 

[peytonsmomie]

Is your dad internet savvy? You could always link him into this board. If he's not, you might try printing out a few pages of really good experiences people have had and posted about on this forum.

Also, you could print out for him some of the articles applauding the commitment disney as a company has to providing benefits and acceptance for all orientations. If you really want this trip to happen, show your father that you recognize and validate his concerns. Then take the time to demonstrate the research and preparations you've made to ensure that his "worst case scenario" isn't really a major concern.

If you put in the "research" to show him how disney has enough pixie dust for ALL their guests, I'm sure it'll ease his mind. As a parent, I can understand wanting to protect my kids from any harm. If you can show him there will be no harm, I bet he'll rediscover his disneymania. Good luck!

 

[Mackey Mouse]

"If he needs that, then ditch the GF, you won't ever regret having spent more time with your father.

This is good advice and I will tell you why. You never know when real life will get in the way and you will say to yourself, I should have done this, I should have done that. If the reason is in fact as Timon-n-Pumbaa Fan eloquently put it:

"If your Dad was just wanting to spend one last vacation with his kids before you all are scattered to the four corners of the world, then I can also understand his desire to go with you and your brother without your GF tagging along. Sometimes, Dads need that last blast of being your parent, the most loved person in your life, and your hero." then maybe you should just go without her.

You should ask him why he would prefer she not go? I always think honesty is the best policy, at least that is what I tell my daughters.. Good luck, I hope you get the answers you are looking for. I would love it to be just that he wants some special father daughter time....

 

[DVCajun]

I don't know how to knock it into his thick skull that it's not a matter of your partner, but knowing when to tone down the PDA.

I guess my first question would be -- has he ever seen you do this?

 

[Uncle Remus]

Find out what his 'hang up' is with your GF comin' 'n go from there, you don't have enough info to know how to address this.

 

[iwish81792]

I talked to him some more about it. It seems like the problem is that he doesn't want to be embarassed by his daughter. It has nothing to do with me bringing my girlfriend, as he's brought women along on our trips before. He doesn't want to end up being pulled aside by some mother of three who is freaking out because we're walking around with our fingers laced together.

And to reply to DVCajun, we definitely tone it down in public. We're not all over each other in school or places like that. Seeing couples all over each other in the halls kind of grosses both of us out, actually.

 

[DVCajun]

I talked to him some more about it. It seems like the problem is that he doesn't want to be embarassed by his daughter. It has nothing to do with me bringing my girlfriend, as he's brought women along on our trips before. He doesn't want to end up being pulled aside by some mother of three who is freaking out because we're walking around with our fingers laced together.

And to reply to DVCajun, we definitely tone it down in public. We're not all over each other in school or places like that. Seeing couples all over each other in the halls kind of grosses both of us out, actually.

My wife and I walk hand in hand in the parks every time we're there -- every day. And we've never had a negative glance. Girls can get away with a lot more than guys can (sorry, guys -- I wish it weren't so). I don't think anyone would pay any attention to two teenagers holding hands. If you up the ante and start getting into the hugs and nuzzling, then you may get a different reaction.