I have another wedding related question.

[Jingle]

I have been living with a guy for 10 years. We started going out 12 years ago. His 17 year old son is going to be an usher in my daughter’s wedding. For the program, we started listing the wedding party and their relationship to the couple. For example, “Jill” Friend of the Bride. “Scott” Brother of the Groom. “Brad” cousin of the bride. So, what do we call the 17 year old? Technically, he’s not her step-brother although they’ve known each other for over 10 years, but it doesn’t seem appropriate to describe him as a friend either. So please give me your thoughts.

 

[lovemygoofy]

What does you daughter think? Does she consider him a brother even though techinically not? I call my no longer stepbrothers and sisters my brothers and sister.

I would call him whatever she wanted and leave it at that.

 

[Rora]

What does you daughter think? Does she consider him a brother even though techinically not?

I'd certainly ask your daughter... if she is at a loss for what to do and you think calling him "(step)brother of the bride" would create unwanted questions, then just stick with "Friend of the Bride".

 

[Jingle]

She's really not sure what to call him either. Would it be OK to call him a step-brother even though he's not? I think she considers him to be her step-brother. She considers him to be more of a step-brother than her true step-brothers and sister from her dad's side. She definitely doesn't consider him just a friend.

 

[Darsa]

Yikes, that's a tough one! I think I would leave it completely up to the bride/groom to decide on that one!

 

[Rora]

She's really not sure what to call him either. Would it be OK to call him a step-brother even though he's not? I think she considers him to be her step-brother. She considers him to be more of a step-brother than her true step-brothers and sister from her dad's side. She definitely doesn't consider him just a friend.

If she would prefer calling him her step-brother, then I would do that and not worry about it. Honestly, people will probably be more interested in the bride, the groom, and the ceremony itself than to notice the wedding party and their connections to the bride &/or groom.

However, some guests may ask you and your significant other "Oh! When did you get married?" and then you'll have to be ready with an explination.

 

[lovemygoofy]

If she is that close to him, I would just list him as a step brother. At this point you and your love have been together for years and she and he were pretty much raised together so I see no difference. I would make sure that all parties involved were comfortable with that title.

 

[happygirl]

I would put friend of bride

 

[sbell111]

Does she consider the guy that you are living with to be her stepfather? If so, his son is her stepbrother.

 

[Diva of Dragons]

I would just put the names and leave it at that. LOL!
Everyone in the party is clearly significant in the couple's lives so, I think the specific relationship is not so important. Besides, it gives the attendees something think and talk about; putting the puzzle together of who's who.

 

[corndog]

I have been living with a guy for 10 years.

Well, if you just call his dad "a guy", then I guess that would make him "a guy's son", or perhaps "son of a guy bride's mom has been living with".

Seriously, though. How do you refer to this "guy"? How does your daughter refer to this "guy"?

 

[Disney Doll]

If your DD thinks of him as her step-brother, then call him that.

"Family" relationships aren't always blood, you know. I have friends who are more "family" to me than some of my blood relatives.

 

[luvmy3]

If your DD thinks of him as her step-brother, then call him that.

"Family" relationships aren't always blood, you know. I have friends who are more "family" to me than some of my blood relatives.

Excellent point, they could put *family of bride* of *member of bride's family*

 

[Bren's Mom]

Are you technically common-law married if you and bf have been living together for 10 years?

I'd put 'Brother' or 'Step-brother' depending on the wishes of your dd. In this circumstance either is appropriate.

We had a 'Sunshine Fund kid' who came to live with us every summer for years. We called him brother, introduced him as brother and wouldn't have hesitated to put 'brother' on our programs at our weddings if he had been in them. We didn't care what anyone else thought.

Family is whomever you choose to make family.

 

[Jeafl]

If your DD thinks of him as her step-brother, then call him that.

"Family" relationships aren't always blood, you know. I have friends who are more "family" to me than some of my blood relatives.

I totally agree. I can't imagine that anyone close enough to be invited to the wedding would even bother to question your wording. If anyone DOES say something just say "He is a step-brother in her heart" and call it good.

 

[Handbag Lady]

I think you should call him "BROTHER."


This way, most people know he's not her real brother, but they WILL see how much a brother he is to her.

And no one will ask you about your marriage since everyone would know BROTHER is not your son.

 

[puffkin]

I would put step-brother if all involved are comfortable with that. If not, something like close family friend....

IMHO, I like when the attendants relationships to the bride & groom are listed. I like to know who people are because often times I only know the bride or grooms significant other and not their family/friends. It is nice to know who is who!

 

[corndog]

Are you technically common-law married if you and bf have been living together for 10 years?

The OP didn't say this "guy" was her "bf".

 

[wvjules]

If the "guy" isnt her BF then "friend" on the program would be more appropriate.

 

[disykat]

I'd go with "family of the bride."