I am kinda miffed at my family and people "in the know"

[Briar Rose 7457]

why don't the two of you just grow up already?

sorry this went astray Meagan.

 

[aahmom1]

Which means you probably still need counseling or at the very least a support group.

It might be the little rolly eyes that did it BL. You're just a ball of sunshine today huh?

 

[nativetxn]

{{{HUGS}}} sweetie. Sorry this was a tough day and that the people you love weren't there to help you through it

 

[aahmom1]

I can totally understand this being a hard day for you. Maybe the reason nobody said anything is because they didn't want to bring up a sore subject, I'm sure they know how hard it is for you. I'm sure it's probably a hard thing for your parents to remember too.

Don't listen to SOME people's rudeness, it really just shows the world what they're really like.

 

[A kid at heart]

I just did the roll eyes back. Not everyone will like what everyone else has to say. Thats what makes us each individuals. Everyone has that option of hitting that back button or the ignore feature.

I am just so upset that no one thought enough to maybe think I was in pain...

ok she is upset by it, a support group would be there for her and help her to deal with it. What is so wrong with that?

 

[Briar Rose 7457]

:shakes head: sigh.

 

[Jenzebelle]

Meagan,
I'm sorry you felt forgotten today. Sometimes, even the people closest to you are a bit clueless when someone they love is needing extra support. I hope you had a better day after you posted this

Have you tried to talk to them about it? Hopefully next year will be easier

 

[A kid at heart]

Yes Mom whatever you say.

 

[aahmom1]

Good, you got the idea.

 

[SuiteDisney]

Meagan, I'm sorry you didn't get the support you needed. Do you think maybe people weren't sure what to do so they just did nothing? Maybe if you approach the people you depend on for support and bring up your daughter and how much you miss her then they'll share their feelings, too. It could be that they wanted to say something, but weren't sure how you would respond, so if you set the example they can follow your lead.

And you can always come here for (((hugs)))

 

[Briar Rose 7457]

I think that may be right, Laura.

 

[bumcat]

Preshi - I have a friend that had to give up her son over 30plus yrs ago. Every yr. she makes a small cake and sings happy birthday to him in private. It's her way of dealing with it.
It's good that you have been thru counseling that always helps but it doesn't stop the pain and sadness. I was in counseling for 4 yrs and I still grieve over things that happened 30 yrs ago. Grieving becomes a problem if it paralyzes you.
Only you know your family. If they are the type that never says anything (every yr.) then you will need to try and understand that that is just the way that they are. If they usually do say something then I too would not understand why they wouldn't say anything this year? Maybe some of them did pick up on the fact that you were grieving and thought it would make it worse if they said something?

 

[JasonLyons]

sorry, you deserve better consideration

 

[WillyJ]

Meagan my friend, I have said this to you before, but I'll say it again. . I admire you, and any woman who has made such a heart wrenching decision and selfless act for the good of their baby. . .

{{{{{hugs}}}} sweetie. . I think if you take the day off every year then those close to you should realize how tough it is and offer some comfort and support, but maybe they really don't know how too. .

I also think that anyone with a heart would feel some sadness and yearning on an anniversary like this. .

I don't think you need counseling my friend; I think some people need a lesson in compassion and manners; what in the world is the purpose of making such a cold remark to someone who is obviously hurting??? un-freaking-believeable. . . .

 

[GAIL HAYDEN]

preshi
This is the one time I can truly say I know how you feel. I have been there, done that and I know how much it hurts.
My family never mentioned it either, it was like it was just an event that if not mentioned would go away.
Later, when I had a family they knew the time was getting near and my emotions would take over, even when I was not aware.
They really never said much but went out of their way to be kind and considerate to me.
I am sorry for your loss and very sorry no one said anything to you on this day.
It is my sincere hope that one day you will see your child again, if that is what you want. I did and I have reunited with my daughter and it is a true joy.
I do hope the support you recieve here today helps.

 

[CookieGVB]

Sounds like you've gotten some good advice here. Don't sit there hurting that nobody's talking to you about it - tell them how you're feeling. I'm sure it wasn't intentional on your family's behalf - and that they were waiting for you to bring up the subject.

{{Hugs}} I know where you're coming from...in a way.

 

[Sharon A.]

My guess is they didn't realize what day it was or just didn't know whether or not to say anything. Did you try to say anything to them? Still, regardless of the reason, I'm sure it hurt to have to deal with the pain without their support.

Anyhow, I'd just like to add my opinion that what you're feeling and going through are very normal. Only someone without a heart wouldn't feel sad on such a day. Heck, I'm a little sad just thinking about how I'd feel if I were in your shoes.

 

[Blondie]

Preshi, if you're still reading this, I'll tell you what my favorite sister-in-law does. She gave up a baby son when she was 17 years old. I was going out with her brother (now my DH) at the time. I felt that baby moving inside her belly, I watched as her tummy got bigger and bigger.

And when my mother (a nurse) called from the hospital to tell me that she had delivered, I cried and cried, because she was giving up that baby, and I could only imagine the pain she was going through.

Every year, on her son's birthday she writes a letter. It goes into the file that is open for him to track her down if he so desires.

She is hoping that one day there will be a knock at the door, and she'll look into his eyes and know who he is.

It hasn't happened yet, but one day, he just might look her up and come to say thank you for giving me a better life. He is 24 years old now.

And there are 24 years of letters waiting for him to read.

 

[Pam]

Meg,
Well, I'm going to give Lily a great big "Happy Birthday!" And I'm giving you a great big, industrial sized {{{{{{HUG}}}}}!!!!

Blondie,
What your SIL does is just so beautiful. Between Meg and your posts, I am sitting here with tears running down my face.

Pam

 

[preshi]

Ok I thought I responded to this thread but I had other things open as well so if someone gets a weird PM... uhhh that was me confused.

Blondie... that made me cry! Thank you for sharing it.

And thank you mostly everyone for your support it means alot to me