How would you feel??

[littlelambie]

Dh and I have been to DLR with ds for the last three years in a row. The next trip will be in May of 2008 and will be me, ds, my parents, my sister and her dh and their dd (too many people for dh to handle, he will sit this one out). Then I find out today that my sister's inlaws are thinking of coming along as well!! I am a bit ticked because the trip was suppose to be about my parents enjoying the kids. Ds and I have been enough times that I can say to everyone that we will go to our own thing for awhile, and meet up later, but I still feel kind of ticked!! Maybe I am just over reacting??

 

[kc10family]

Oh I SOOOOOOOOOOOO (did I say SO) understand what you are saying. I had something like this happen in Sep 05 and I tell ya what. I will NEVER do that again with out RULES and other structure.
It is just a fact that (family or not) when many people try to do something it can be hard. I would just plan to meet them for a few meals and rides. Also I would schedule time for just you and your parents with DS.

I to this day am a bit upset at the way my family got treated by other family members on that trip. It started as just us with some friends who like to do family time, then get together for a few things as a group. THEN my sister added her 4 family members, then my mother came for a few days. My brother then brought his girlfriend and THEN her parents came.
We went from 7 people planning a simi together trip to 16 going. I will not do that again whatsoever.

I am not saying you will end up getting upset with your family as I did, but please make rules and schedules to prevent problems.

Best of luck.

 

[littlelambie]

Oh I SOOOOOOOOOOOO (did I say SO) understand what you are saying. I had something like this happen in Sep 05 and I tell ya what. I will NEVER do that again with out RULES and other structure.
It is just a fact that (family or not) when many people try to do something it can be hard. I would just plan to meet them for a few meals and rides. Also I would schedule time for just you and your parents with DS.

I to this day am a bit upset at the way my family got treated by other family members on that trip. It started as just us with some friends who like to do family time, then get together for a few things as a group. THEN my sister added her 4 family members, then my mother came for a few days. My brother then brought his girlfriend and THEN her parents came.
We went from 7 people planning a simi together trip to 16 going. I will not do that again whatsoever.

I am not saying you will end up getting upset with your family as I did, but please make rules and schedules to prevent problems.

Best of luck.

I totally know what you are saying, but I also don't want to have to end up planning everyone's trip. If things get too crazy for me, ds and I will just take off, and meet up with them all later. Plus, with us having been so many times, there are some things ds doesn't feel the need to do. I mean, he might want to do things because my niece is, but I feel quite comfortable just walking away from the maddness!! I know my sister is planning on doing Universal, and sea world, and ds and I won't do that. And they are all coming home on a Sunday, and ds and I will leave on the Saturday so he can return to school on Monday. I am a more independent person than my sister, and hve no problems being on my own. What will probably happen is they will all decide what they want to do, and then ds and I will decide if we want to join them or not. That probably sounds really snotty, but I also don't want everyone following me around asking "What are we doing next?". Oh boy, I am feeling stressed already, and it is over a year away!!!

 

[DangerMouse]

Yep, I feel your pain! My MIL invited herself along on my mother's trip (both my in laws already had their turn at Disney with the grandkids and it was supposed to be my mom's turn). It was a HORRIBLE experience. She ended up sick, and collapsed in the park because she had combined too many medicines. After an ER trip and shipping her home on the plane, we were finally able to have a good time. (Sorry, I know that sounds harsh). She never should have gone in the first place. It wasn't her turn!

Anyway, if someone asked me "what are we doing next?" I would say, "Well, my family is going this way, you're welcome to follow or not" and leave it at that.

Good luck and don't be afraid to claim personal family time for yourselves.

 

[littlelambie]

Yep, I feel your pain! My MIL invited herself along on my mother's trip (both my in laws already had their turn at Disney with the grandkids and it was supposed to be my mom's turn). It was a HORRIBLE experience. She ended up sick, and collapsed in the park because she had combined too many medicines. After an ER trip and shipping her home on the plane, we were finally able to have a good time. (Sorry, I know that sounds harsh). She never should have gone in the first place. It wasn't her turn!

Anyway, if someone asked me "what are we doing next?" I would say, "Well, my family is going this way, you're welcome to follow or not" and leave it at that.

Good luck and don't be afraid to claim personal family time for yourselves.

Thanks, that was pretty much how I was feeling. I will let ds dictate how him and I spend our time, and the rest is up to the rest of them.

 

[abby]

While I haven't been to DL with a group, I am an experienced group trip person. What I have learned, is decide what You want to do, including maybe a special meal with your folks, and then meet up with the others when it works for you. I know that may sound heartless, but you need to plan YOUR trip and let them do their thing. It will make for a better trip. Maybe plan one meal a day as a group, lunch is good. Then do your thing.......

 

[JenDisneylandlver]

Been there done that! My DH's family actually did a huge family reunion type trip in 2003. It was my MIL and FIL. My SIL and her husband and son. My BIL and his wife, and their 4 boys. AND my DH's Grandmother, DH's Uncle and grandson showed up for one of the days. As well as DH's OTHER Grandparents for lunch one day. It was nuts! Nothing I'd ever do again. We did a lot of "okay, we'll were gonna go do this, meet up with you later" type of things. Which would just tick off some of his family. But a lot of what they did was stand around waiting for everyone else, talk about a waste of time at DL! Then the "favortism" started to kick in by my MIL and FIL and my son got his feelings hurt on more then one occasion. That's when I put an end to spending any time with them during the trip, and we went our own ways.

It just doesn't work with that many people, especially when they all have their own ideas of how the trip should go. Too much bickering, feelings hurt. Not worth it! In October of 2007 were taking my Mom with us. But that is IT! That will be a nice trip. I'd never let anyone horn in on those plans, after the experience I had, it would ruin everything. Good luck, I feel for you!

 

[mundaremom]

I know exactly what you are saying. My brother's family and ours planned a trip for November 2006 and a few other family members found out and insisted on coming and then wondering why we were doing certain things and why we would stay at the hotel we chose, etc. They couldn't clue in that this was just my brother and his family and me with my family. That this trip only happened for my brother because of some unexpected money we both came into. I got angry and as a result the other family members and I are not talking (they are probably reading this though). I say stick to your guns! While in DL my brother and I agreed if the other family members had come it would have been too much for the trip! You have to do what is right for your family.

 

[Albort]

yea, i know it sucks but i think its better if you just live with it since you cant really say no...

its like when my mom decided to take just my grandma to eat some really expensive lobsters and crabs, my grandma invites my cousin's family...