How do you treat the anniversary of a loved one's death?

[TEENEE]

One of my fears is that my dad will be forgotten if I don' t do something to keep his memory alive. I always appreciate hearing from friends around his anniversary date. It feels good to know that other people still think of him. I try not to focus on the loss but to celebrate his life. A card or a phone call would be a great way to show you remember. As someone else said, you don't even need to say why you are calling, a simple we're thinking of you will be appreciated.

 

[Cruise04]

With my moms death it's a commemoration in my eyes. Since last year was the one year mark I took the day off (wasn't sure how hard it was going to be for me) and made sure I was there for my aunt. I went and visited the cemetary, cleaned up the stone a bit and just talked to her. Then I went to my aunt's, we talked a bit and I went back out to the cemetary with her. We stood there and laughed about the funny things about my mom. Then we went to lunch.

I do have to say it made my day much easier to deal with. So I definitely think a Thinking of You card would be nice. Let the family know you guys are there if they need to make a phone call or need prayers.

 

[arminnie]

In the Jewish religion there is a commemoration on the anniversary of the death of a loved one. I think it's a lovely idea.

I found this on Jewish Literacy web site:

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It is significant to note that in Judaism we downplay birthdays, never commemorating the date of birth of one who has passed away, yet we are careful to mark the anniversary of someone's death.

The Talmud compares this to a ship. How odd that we hold a big party when the ship is about to sail, yet when it arrives at its destination, nothing is done. It really should be the other way around.

Although the day of birth holds all the potential for the life that will be, the day of death is the marker of who we actually became. Our worth is measured according to how much of our potential was realized. Did we live up to who we were to the best of our ability in the time that we had?

When our loved ones die and go back to God, to their "port of call," we mourn not having them here with us, yet we remember what they were able to accomplish in this life. The yartzeit's annual commemoration is a time to feel the sadness -- but also to celebrate who they were and the life they lived.

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[yourtravelpro]

I think any way you chose to acknowledge it would be appropriate. Just make sure you acknowledge it, because, believe me, it will be appreciated and it will make a difference!!