Have you written a eulogy for someone?

[lisajl]

If so, would you be willing to share how you came up with the eulogy itself?

My mom is going downhill pretty fast. My sister has asked me to start writing something. I feel really weird starting it before she passes away but my sister tells me it may be better that way. I guess because it won't be rushed.

But, please, if you have any ideas, I would welcome them.

Lisa

 

[pumba]

my brother just did one for our sister and we all sort of added our own thoughts too.....what they had accomplished in their life......what do we remember that stood out that was so wonderful, outstanding, funny or sad.....whatever we can remember.....what did she do in her younger years ......how did she cope with being a mom and maybe a working person too .......make her life come back to life ......My brother did such a great job that it brings tears to my eyes when I remember it......my sister died June 16th so this is so fresh still...
My thoughts are with you and your family

 

[lisajl]

Pumba,
I'm sorry for the loss of your sister. It must be very tough.
Thanks for the info.
We just went to my Aunts funeral last week, she was 91. My cousins wrote something they remembered from growing up on the farm. My sister and I just laughed and cried right along with them. It really brought back good memories.
That is what we want for mom. We may not have had the best mom in the world, but we want to send her out the right way.

 

[Boston Tea Party]

I've never written one, but the ones that I like are the ones that mention things that are personal and special to the departed. I don't care for the laundry list of facts.

My father is suffering from terminal cancer. The other day an idea popped into my head for him. He's retired Army and one thing he's done with all the kids (when they were little) is to get them to march to a cadence. I want to deliver the eulogy - not sure if I will be able to - but at the end I want to say, "Now march into Heaven with your left, your left, your left right left. At ease, soldier."

Not sure if it would be too flippant, but it's very special to us.

My best writing has been done late at night while listening to Elvis Costello. If you've done writing before that you've been proud of you might replicate the atmosphere and let your mind flow. The right words will come.
Best of luck to you.

 

[Desnik]

I wrote one for my grandma. My older sister helped too. We actually did it so quickly the memories were so fresh when we started sharing stories with eachother. We wrote basic factual stuff like where she was born, for those in attendance who didn't know. But we included things that made her the woman she was. A strong, loving grandmother. My uncle was a mess and couldn't even talk, my dad had mixed feelings about her and didn't want to write or contribute anything. So my sister and I just wrote in a few sentences from her son's perspectives. Like how she would wait up and look out the front window for my uncle when he was out with his friends. We basically summed up her life and included a few personal stories, some funny ones too. Neither of us could read it though, we had a cousin do it. It was a really tough time, she died on X-mas morning 2 years ago. She had Alzheimers for about 10 years, but your really never prepared for when your loved one really leaves you.
I'm sorry that you are going through this.


pumba
I'm so sorry fo the loss of your sister.

 

[PaulaSue]

I spoke at my Granddmother's funeral but it wasn't really formal like others I have seen. I wrote all ideas down and worked from there. I just spoke about the games and craft things she did with us (couisins) and my favorite was her always making pumpkin pie for Thanksgiving with cool whip.

Good Luck, writing it was much easier than speaking it.

 

[DznyFan]

LisaJL,

First, let me say how sorry I am to hear this, my prayers for you and your family.

My sister and I had to do this for our step-mother 8 years ago - her own kids were emotionally unable. Since we had to fly out of state after she passed, we were very short on time. We talked to many of her family - daughters, grandchildren, sisters, friends, and compiled a list of accomplishments and stories. We then wrote, and arranged - trying to balance humorous stories with the serious and emotional. We also had to present it at the funeral. I wish you the best of luck with this. Perhaps just lock yourself away for a few hours at a time, listen to some inspiring music, and let the words and thoughts flow.