Happy People.....

[The Mystery Machine]

I think happiness is a choice and an attitude.

Yes.

You have to make hard choices that are unpleasant at times. I think that is where people get stuck and sit in unhappy limbo.

Each choice is going to result in "something". You need the intelligence to make a decision that is going to lead you to that happiness.

Sometimes it is a choice that you don't want to make.

 

[Pooh67_68]

My sister told me I am too happy for my own good.


Judy from Boise, my motto is kill them with kindness.

 

[Handbag Lady]

I don't know.

I think people are generally happy or unhappy people. I am a happy person. I always have been and I assume I always will be.

My DH is the opposite. When there are good times, he always says things like, gee, when will the bad stuff happen? You know, things like that.

Me? Even if it a crappy situation (like when we got robbed at CBR) I get mad and hurt and angry, but it doesn't mean that I lose faith in humankind. I have plenty of happy days and great times to more than make up for the bad stuff.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

I don't know.

I think people are generally happy or unhappy people. I am a happy person. I always have been and I assume I always will be.

You see I can't agree with this. Don't you think it is the choices that you make that lead to your unhappy/happiness?
I guess comfort in your decisions maybe?

For example I have an 18yo nephew that is going to leave his mother and 2 brothers because she is abusive to him.

Right now he puts up with it, is on meds, and knows he can walk out at anytime now. It is serious.

So he will have to choose to walk out to become happy.

My other nephew who walked out at 17 with the clothes on his back is now happy at 23. He also was in an abusive situation.

I really think it is about "choice" when it all boils down to the nitty-gritty.

Take comfort in the fact your "choice" no matter how painful or easy is the right thing to do.
From cutting out someone in your life to losing a few lbs.

That comfort & follow thru in your decisions is where the happiness lies.

 

[suzimar57]

i'm a happy person inside, but surrounded by lots of unhappy people...

 

[C.Ann]

Sometimes life is hard on people and you may not understand the whole story. Hard knocks come in some serious flavors that linger for years... hug those people you judge and be thankful you have not had the knocks they may have had.

I was more thinking seriously depressed people, people who cant get a grip after a tragedy. Those people can not be blamed. Stuff happens and not everyone can pull out of it ASAP. I am sure you understand that. Sometimes it's mental or even medical and it takes time.

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Happiness is a fleeting emotion - in the lives of everyone, regardless of whether people choose to believe that or not.. You can be happy "most" of the time - you can even "appear" to be happy "all" of the time - but that is a fallacy.. I have never met a person who is happy 100% of the time..

Earlier today my dear friends DH dropped by.. His beautiful, wonderful wife passed away on the Monday of Thanksgiving week.. He's one of those "always happy, jolly people.." He stopped by to give me a Christmas ornament that his wife made me earlier this fall - knowing that she probably wouldn't live long enough to give it to me herself.. He was still "smiling and jolly" but the pain in the depth of his eyes was something you would have to be blind not to see.. In private - (or in his DD's presence) - he is a tremendously heartbroken man.. His current "front" is a front that will come back to bite him big time somewhere down the road because he is not allowing himself to grieve.. People are used to him being a "certain" way - and so the charade continues.. Grief makes "non-grievers" very uncomfortable, so the "griever" has two choices - put on a charade and delay the grieving process - or grieve in isolation so as not to make "others" uncomfortable..

If that is the kind of "happiness" you are talking about, no - I don't think it's a "choice" - and shouldn't be expected to be one..

 

[L107ANGEL]

Well C Ann, I don't think thats what it meant. I am also very sorry about your friend
Am I happy all the time? Hellno! I do however try to see the brighter side of things, even when they are not so great.
Am I putting on a front? Depends I guess. However when I am upset, my family feels it twice as hard. They are not used to seeing me that way.
2007 was a VERY hard time for my family. When I found out about my health concerns, well it knocked me down for the count. Then I lost my job of almost 10 years completely unexpected.
I cried myself to sleep countless nights. But the holidays were coming and I am the queen of the vow of jolly, so I just went with that.
Eventually it worked, I wasn't faking it, I was happy.
I have a great new job and well the brain anneurism is getting any bigger, so thats a positive thing.
Everyday I have is a gift. I have always lived with the motto to laugh, love and live like there is no tomorrow. Now even more.
My DH used to be pessimistic, I would tell him over and over, stop borrowing trouble and stop sweating the small stuff. Luckily for all of us he did.
I have a family member that walks through life like Eeeyore. I truely feel sorry for her that she can't see the joy and happiness all around her.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

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If that is the kind of "happiness" you are talking about, no - I don't think it's a "choice" - and shouldn't be expected to be one..

I don't think you can include death in the happiness equation, C. Ann. Sorry about your friend.

The choice I am talking about is doing things that are tough to lead to happiness.

 

[C.Ann]

Well C Ann, I don't think thats what it meant. I am also very sorry about your friend
Am I happy all the time? Hellno! I do however try to see the brighter side of things, even when they are not so great.
Am I putting on a front? Depends I guess. However when I am upset, my family feels it twice as hard. They are not used to seeing me that way.
2007 was a VERY hard time for my family. When I found out about my health concerns, well it knocked me down for the count. Then I lost my job of almost 10 years completely unexpected.
I cried myself to sleep countless nights. But the holidays were coming and I am the queen of the vow of jolly, so I just went with that.
Eventually it worked, I wasn't faking it, I was happy.
I have a great new job and well the brain anneurism is getting any bigger, so thats a positive thing.
Everyday I have is a gift. I have always lived with the motto to laugh, love and live like there is no tomorrow. Now even more.
My DH used to be pessimistic, I would tell him over and over, stop borrowing trouble and stop sweating the small stuff. Luckily for all of us he did.
I have a family member that walks through life like Eeeyore. I truely feel sorry for her that she can't see the joy and happiness all around her.

-------------------------

That kind of "happiness" I can understand.. I have a saying "Fake it till you can make it" - and I have had to do it many, many times over the years.. Sometimes it really works - other times things come so fast and furious - one on top of another - that even "faking" isn't possible..

I'm very sorry to hear of all you have been through recently - and I admire your ability to remain upbeat and positive - but I think for many people it varies from day to day.. One day nothing is bothersome - the next day everything is bothersome..

I guess I was confused by what the OP was getting at and that's why I pointed out that it's impossible for anyone to be happy and optimistic all of the time - KWIM? (Well - unless we're talking about my brother - who lives in "La La Land" ALL of the time!! )

 

[NEVERENOUGHWDW]

Some people wake up every morning never knowing how lucky they are just waking up.

I'm grateful for each and every minute I'm awake, therefore 99% of the time I'm a very happy person. Your right it is mind boggling to be with people who just are not happy...I just went through the holidays with a bunch of them (family members).

I don't subject myself to them unless I have to, we tolerate them for the holidays, try to rub off some of our cheer on them!

I also think happiness can be learned & is rare if someone has no "faith".

 

[L107ANGEL]

:

 

[brytorlyn]

I have always been a happy person....I always see the cup as half full

A week before Christmas my beautiful 17 year old daughter ran away from home. She moved in with her boyfriend and his family (single father who apparently has never been there for his sons, doesn't clean ,care for the house or feed them and they don't see the mom). He is 19,, a former drug dealer, pierced and tattooed in many places and over all just a slimy person.

She left because we said she couldn't see him or get a lip piercing.

I cry all the time...my eyes are permanently red and skin on my face is raw from tears. My son (21) has been supportive and so has DH....but even they are sick of the sadness in our home. We also have a 7 year old for whom I am trying to control myself but I can't.

Sometimes people just get in situations that they can't rise above.

 

[L107ANGEL]

I have always been a happy person....I always see the cup as half full

A week before Christmas my beautiful 17 year old daughter ran away from home. She moved in with her boyfriend and his family (single father who apparently has never been there for his sons, doesn't clean ,care for the house or feed them and they don't see the mom). He is 19,, a former drug dealer, pierced and tattooed in many places and over all just a slimy person.

She left because we said she couldn't see him or get a lip piercing.

I cry all the time...my eyes are permanently red and skin on my face is raw from tears. My son (21) has been supportive and so has DH....but even they are sick of the sadness in our home. We also have a 7 year old for whom I am trying to control myself but I can't.

Sometimes people just get in situations that they can't rise above.

I am so sorry!!!

 

[WebmasterMaryJo]

I have always been a happy person....I always see the cup as half full

A week before Christmas my beautiful 17 year old daughter ran away from home. She moved in with her boyfriend and his family (single father who apparently has never been there for his sons, doesn't clean ,care for the house or feed them and they don't see the mom). He is 19,, a former drug dealer, pierced and tattooed in many places and over all just a slimy person.

She left because we said she couldn't see him or get a lip piercing.

I cry all the time...my eyes are permanently red and skin on my face is raw from tears. My son (21) has been supportive and so has DH....but even they are sick of the sadness in our home. We also have a 7 year old for whom I am trying to control myself but I can't.

Sometimes people just get in situations that they can't rise above.

I'm sorry.

 

[brytorlyn]

Thank you

 

[Robindianne]

I have always been a happy person....I always see the cup as half full

A week before Christmas my beautiful 17 year old daughter ran away from home. She moved in with her boyfriend and his family (single father who apparently has never been there for his sons, doesn't clean ,care for the house or feed them and they don't see the mom). He is 19,, a former drug dealer, pierced and tattooed in many places and over all just a slimy person.

She left because we said she couldn't see him or get a lip piercing.

I cry all the time...my eyes are permanently red and skin on my face is raw from tears. My son (21) has been supportive and so has DH....but even they are sick of the sadness in our home. We also have a 7 year old for whom I am trying to control myself but I can't.

Sometimes people just get in situations that they can't rise above.

I'm so sorry brytorlyn. You and you whole family are in my thoughts.