Grandma rant (lovingly)

[BrianL]

Man, I grew up before all of the safety protocols came around. I mean, I get it why they exist and more safety is a good thing, but it seems to me like some people get a little too intense about it. I never had a car seat or cabinet locks, or electrical covers. One of my earliest memories was sticking my finger in an electrical outlet, and I got a little shock too. I did that exactly ONCE - in my entire life! I learned a lesson and, guess what? I was fine too. Kids are pretty resilient. Sure, of course, why take chances, but a baby taking a nap without a monitor one time is very unlikely to be an issue.

 

[sam_gordon]

but a baby taking a nap without a monitor one time is very unlikely to be an issue.

Heck, I'd say a baby taking a nap without a monitor a THOUSAND times is very unlikely to be an issue.

 

[mmouse37]

We watch 4 of our 5 grandkids very regularly and we do have a monitor for the nursery. The older ones no longer nap on a schedule but the 9 month old does. I use the monitor mainly to see if she is awake yet. I do not constantly watch or listen. The app is on my phone. I will check it every once in awhile to see if she is up or not. When the others were younger and they slept over I didn't really use the monitor at night. I felt it kept me from sleeping as every sound I wanted to check on them. Then I realized if they really needed me in the middle of the night I would hear them when they cried (without the monitor). When our kids were babies we only had a monitor with sound and we kept picking up other peoples' portable phone conversations so that was annoying.

 

[BrianL]

Heck, I'd say a baby taking a nap without a monitor a THOUSAND times is very unlikely to be an issue.

Oh, sure. I was just referencing the reaction to this situation. People got along for at least a couple of years before monitors were invented, and the babies were fine.

 

[evilmommie]

What a sweet story! Congrats, Grandma. Your daughter is super lucky to have you around to watch her darling.

 

[jo-jo]

I’m just picturing parents everywhere losing their minds because when the sock falls off the app alerts them that their child no longer has a pulse. Chaos ensues. (Ever try to keep socks on an active infant?)

While DGD was still in hospital, the ankle thing fell off when I picked her up. DD and I looked at each other expecting chaos to follow. Nope, nurse come in, picks it up, clips it back on, like she does it ten times a day.

 

[nicolita3]

I have known coworkers who have the app that video monitors their kids. They'll even watch while the kid is at grandma's house and call if grandma leaves the kid in the room for just a few minutes. It's crazy to me how much they watch their phones they'll leave it propped up on their desk the entire day playing.

 

[jrmasm]

Is this a video monitor? Are you suppose to sit and watch all day like a security guard?

What will you need to do when baby starts walking/crawling? Better start ordering 3 or 4 thousand corner bumpers for every edge in your house.

But to be honest, we did place pillows on the end of the fireplace hearth when our kids were little.

I just remember a story about my DS. Who remembers Mr Yuck? It was a sticker you put on where cleaning stuff was (like under sink). Suppose to be "don't go there, see Mr. Yuck"? My DS ate the sticker.

I hope your DD buys and installs/puts together all the safety items, she feels you need.

But enjoy that baby, sing every song you can think off, take millions of pictures.

Your son ate a Mr Yuck sticker? OMG I’m dead!

 

[Boopuff]

Op here: The really sad part of this is all the “perfect” mommies who post about their “perfect” baby, “perfect” after birth body, makes me sick. My DD and I are going to get basic, no video, monitor for our house. GS will survive his time with us! Thanks everyone

 

[BrianL]

I just remember a story about my DS. Who remembers Mr Yuck? It was a sticker you put on where cleaning stuff was (like under sink). Suppose to be "don't go there, see Mr. Yuck"? My DS ate the sticker.

I do remember the Mr. Yuck stickers. That's what we had instead of cabinet locks. All of the cleaning supplies were kept under the sink too. I was just taught not to mess with that stuff - unless I was cleaning of course. I am pretty sure I was "helping" to clean windows when I was about 4! It's amazing that I survived at all.

 

[Kestryl]

On the flip side… A college friend is grieving the death of her five month old who died during a nap just last week. They’re wondering if there was anything they could have done, specifically wondering about those expensive SIDS monitors.

It is unlikely that death would happen, and it is unlikely there was anything the parents could have done, but I have an incredibly amount of sympathy for parents worried about keeping their kids safe.

ETA: not to be a total downer! Just noticing that baby monitors are a recurring topic in my life this week!

 

[wfjny]

Op here: The really sad part of this is all the “perfect” mommies who post about their “perfect” baby, “perfect” after birth body, makes me sick. My DD and I are going to get basic, no video, monitor for our house. GS will survive his time with us! Thanks everyone

I too hate all the people that say their children are perfect. I have great kids. Far from perfect, and they were much better when outside the house than they were inside.

You would probably like how this person shared his background info on Wheel of Fortune:

'Wheel of Fortune' contestant says he's 'trapped in a loveless marriage' in introduction (nbcnews.com)

 

[mjkacmom]

I only used a monitor (no video) if I was in the yard. Never at night.

 

[AgentMama]

Really? Regardless of the need for it? So you advocate that $300 sock PP mentioned? I mean it's available, so you should use it?

I'd argue that in a small house (or when the parents are within a room or so of the baby) even a sound monitor isn't NEEDED. A video monitor (IMO of course) would RARELY be needed. I can't even think of a case where it would be, but I'll allow there's probably some rare condition where someone needs to look at their child 24/7.

Just because the tech is available shouldn't mean it's mandatory.

You're welcome to take anything I say out of context and quote just a small piece of it. I also said if the daughter wants her to have technology, she can buy it. There is a lot of new technology out that keeps infants and toddlers safe that wasn't around decades ago. Everyone can be as responsible or irresponsible with their safety decisions as legally permissible.

 

[luvnwdwgal]

Congratulations! I became a grandma 11 years ago yesterday. I sat and held her all day long it seemed. Just couldn’t get enough of her. Can’t believe she’s that old already. We also have 2 other granddaughters who are 8 and 6. I quit working full time to babysit. It was usually about 50 hours a week and boy when the 3rd one came and I had a 4 year old and a 20 month old it was crazy. I sat and held our first one all day long it seemed. Btw, never used a baby monitor.

 

[sam_gordon]

You're welcome to take anything I say out of context and quote just a small piece of it. I also said if the daughter wants her to have technology, she can buy it. There is a lot of new technology out that keeps infants and toddlers safe that wasn't around decades ago. Everyone can be as responsible or irresponsible with their safety decisions as legally permissible.

But just because it's "new" or "technology" doesn't necessarily mean it's required to keep kids safe (in other words, if you don't use it, your kids aren't as safe). That was my point. Video monitors have been out for decades now. Would you say someone who doesn't use a video monitor in their kids room has made their kids "less safe"?

 

[dez1978]

Please just remember that you probably felt like that too with your own mom when you were a new mom. I don't know anyone who was just calm and chill with their 1st baby and didn't worry about ridiculous things for at least a few months. Humor her for a little bit.

I survived riding in a car on the floorboard in a pumpkin seat, and remember when you didn't even have to wear a seatbelt in the back seat. But now?? My 10.5 yr old still uses a booster seat because thats what safer. When we know better, we do better. This whole "I raised 4 kids of my own and none of them died" doesn't make the things that we survived any safer.

 

[AgentMama]

But just because it's "new" or "technology" doesn't necessarily mean it's required to keep kids safe (in other words, if you don't use it, your kids aren't as safe). That was my point. Video monitors have been out for decades now. Would you say someone who doesn't use a video monitor in their kids room has made their kids "less safe"?

Actually, I do think infant and toddler rooms without video monitors are less safe, I did NOT say unsafe. That's my point of view...

We caught one of our kids climbing out of their crib on multiple occasions on video, we never heard it happening. And AGAIN, I said if the parent wanted it, they could provide it.

 

[dez1978]

Heck, I'd say a baby taking a nap without a monitor a THOUSAND times is very unlikely to be an issue.

1 in 1000 babies die of SIDS in the US. Would a regular monitor stop that? Unlikely, but its not like moms are crazy to want to check in on their babies from outside the room.

 

[TipsyTraveler]

In defense of your daughter, the “expert” recommendations to new parents today revolve around two main themes — every time your baby falls asleep there’s a possibility of abrupt death, and everything is a choking hazard. Congrats on your new bundle! Death is around every corner just waiting for the opportunity to strike! Take a look at the AAP’s pages of rules your daughter is expected to follow if she wants her baby to have any hope of surviving the night:

https://publications.aap.org/pediat...and-Other-Sleep-Related-Infant-Deaths-Updated
In summary, make sure they’re sleeping on rock-solid surfaces devoid of any comfort unless you want them to DIE. Don’t let them get too warm unless you want them to DIE. Use a baby swing to rock them to sleep? Not unless you want them to DIE. Take them for a car ride around the block to get them to fall asleep? Obviously you want them to DIE.

Personally, I never used a monitor because I never saw the need. Babies are now supposed to sleep in their parents’ room for the first year and our homes at the times my kids were born were small enough that I’d never be more than a room away in the daytime during naps.