Going to the Principal's office...need tips

[jrmasm]

DH and I have meeting this afternoon with the Principal regarding DD (7)'s class assignment.

Two days ago we received a form letter from the school with the name of her teacher for the coming year. The school year starts 08/26 and she will be starting 2nd grade.

Our concern is that we have been told by a friend that works in the school that this is not the best teacher for her and that we need to do whatever we can to get her out of this class.

A little background: DD is bright little girl and has not had good teachers in K or 1st. She has not been challenged at all and last year we received frequent phone calls from the teacher because of her behavior. Each time we were called we held DD responsible for her actions and she was punished. However, what do you expect from a 6 year old that is bored out of her mind for 6 hours of the day!!

I am very concerned about the possibility that she is facing another year that is completely without challenges and the effects that it will have on her longterm.

Any suggestions? I'm a little nervous because I've never been to the Principal's office before !!

 

[Rock'n Robin]

I think he will want to know who gave you the info about the teacher, and he will defend his teacher. He will be concerned that if too many kids switch classes that the other teachers will be overwhelmed, and that this teacher will look bad. Keep on pressing your point, however, and whatever you do do not raise the voice or get upset. Most good principals are trained to keep things on an even keel in these type of conversations.
What age do they start gifted ed. at your school? My daughter will also be in grade 2 and has tested off the chart for reading, but they don't start gifted ed. until grade 3. Perhaps you will at least be able to get her tested.
Robin M.

 

[tiggerlover]

Boy does this sound some what familiar, I just came from seeing the principal this morning in regards to my DS's class assignment. (DS starts school on 8/26 too).

Personally it is hard to judge a teacher on other people's recommendations, I say this because I am having issues with DS's teacher and everyone else loves her. The only advice I can give is to be honest with the principal about your concerns and feelings and maybe they (meaning the principal and teacher) can find ways to challenge your daughter and still keep her with the class. You may find that your daughter and this teacher actually work out fine, but you don't know until you give her a try. I found our principal very receptive, when I brought some of my concerns to him he thought it may be possible to do some fine tuning in certain areas and incorporate certain things so everyone can be happy.

Good luck, I know how you are feeling and I hope you get the best possible outcome for your daughter.

 

[amid chaos]

I think you need to learn the new teachers teaching style and your childs learning style and let the principal know if they don't match up and your child deserves a good year THIS year.

I have never changed a placement with any of my children until this year. (keep in mind Norah will be a senior this year so i've been at this a while).

My DD who will be in 2nd grade this year has had maternity leave teachers for Kindergarten and first grade. She had 4 full time substitutes in 2 years...totally unacceptable. I asked for a consistent placement for her this year and got it.

DS's fifth grade teacher found out who his teacher was going to be for sixth grade and went to the pricipal asking that he be moved. then she suggested I write a letter asking for the same thing. The teacher he was placed with is excellent but not right for DS and we are waiting to hear who his new teacher will be.

 

[TimeforMe]

I know how you feeling as we had a similar situation when DS was in 2nd grade. A friend of mine's son had this particular teacher and she disliked her so much that she had him moved to another class in January--halfway through the school year! Well, I spoke to alot of parents (getting mixed "reviews") and also other teachers (I was PTA president at the time) and then finally informally to the principal voicing my concerns. She really put my mind at ease explaining the teacher's style without being overly persuasive. I decided to go with my gut feeling and let my DS stay in her class. Well, she turned out to be one of the best teachers he has had (now entering 7th grade) and really knew my DS's strengths and weaknesses, was very creative and nurturing and just an all-around nice person. She was, however, totaly disorganized, her classroom always a mess, etc., etc. and some kids can't deal with that.

Anyway, my suggestion to you is speak to the principal but definitely keep an open mind. I work at a school now and for the most part, they DO match up teachers/students/peers pretty well. Good luck and keep us posted!

 

[mickey65]

I would give it a try before deciding to change teachers. I am a teacher and so many times I have had other members of the teaching staff say to me...'oh watch out for so and so...they have behaviour problems'.....the student does not stand a chance because of the warning of expected behaviour problems. The same for the line...'oh so and so is not very smart.....this is the best he can do so don't expect much from him' If we take this advice, guidance, warning..whatever you want to call it...then most likey we will look for ways for that prophecy to be fulfilled. However if we pay little head to it..and be our own judges we might just find something wonderful, that we would of missed out on.

Just my opinion

 

[shortbun]

Stay calm, be firm. Ask for a meeting with the teacher
and the principal to outline the plan for DD so she
does not have another boring year. These years are
critical to her because she will develop either her love
of school or get set up to fail. Start spending time in the
school this year-volunteer as much as possible. This
allows you to have face time with many teachers and
other parents who are very involved in their children and
watching teachers too. It's pretty hard to be victorious
based on what someone else told you...but, based on
what you have personally observed, that's another story.
Ask the principal to suggest special programs for DD,
things like math club,artists in the school,science fairs,
chess club, drumming, choir,
and sports teams where she will come in major contact
with other teachers who can enrich her experience.
Ask about the enrichment programs for gifted and ask
that she be included even if her age group is not normally
targeted or identified. Don't let up on this one-I know several
people who have made it happen and not in our schools
here. The key here is to turn your DD's negative school
experience into a positive one; your's too!
Good luck and be prepared to do some of the work yourself-
researching programs and enrichment possibilities.
the principal may welcome the help in turning this situation
around. Be positive with your daughter. Look for solutions
instead of punishments. She needs your positive support
in solving her problems.

 

[Tesabat]

Hi - browsing here and saw this note. The key is to not let the principal get defensive. He's probably just been flooded by calls for appointments to change class assignments, so his mindset might already be, unfortunately, to just say no.

I would approach this as though you are seeking information and ADVICE from someone who knows all the teachers. I would state what you said in your note - that your daughter has had two difficult years and some behavioral problems that you feel are the result of boredom. That she hasn't been challenged. Then, I would ask him some questions about the new teacher's style - things that you know will either help or hinder your daughter. Again, remind him you are seeking advice to prevent another potentially difficult year for the student AND the teacher. I don't know what those questions might be for your child - for mine, they would be - does the teacher frequently break up into smaller groups, using a round-robin method...or does the teacher use a whole-classroom method of teaching. That type of thing. Does the teacher engage the children in a lot of projects? Allow movement around the classroom? If you talk about what your child is like, and he knows his teacher's styles, then the two of you may come up with a good match...might even be the same teacher!

If the principal will not change assignments, period, then I would suggest requesting a meeting 2 or so weeks into the school year with the teacher and/or principal. (Try to time it before school pictures, but after the class routines have settled in - just in case she changes classes.) In those first two weeks, I would also ask that you be allowed to observe the classroom...perhaps by helping out one morning, or however they can set it up. If you are concerned by what you see, ask the teacher to contact your or set up a quick mtg. State your concerns - the teacher may even have suggestions for someone more suited to your child's needs - and be prepared to move your child to another classroom. It may be upsetting to your child at first to change classrooms, but within a handful of days, she will settle in again, and by having a teacher better suited to her style, have a much happier and productive year.

Good luck!

 

[jrmasm]

Dh and I just spoke and here is our game plan. He's going to do most of the talking (I am way too emotional ). He's going to go over her history the last two years and explain the things that have troubled us. He will also outline what we feel are DD's needs for this year.

What we are hoping is that the Principal will then do some kind of "sell job" on the teacher that DD has been assigned to and that opens a discussion to talk about the specific strengths and weaknesses of the teacher and how they relate to our DD's needs.

We are not going into the meeting to demand a change and I hope that if a change is not made that we will feel better and have a better understanding of why they made the decision that they did.

 

[jldriscoll]

Sounds like you are on the right track!! Good Luck!! Check back in and let us know how it goes!!!

 

[jrmasm]

After hearing what we had to say, the Principal said among other things that 1) the teacher is strict and has a dry sense of humor (not a problem for us) 2) the teacher is very good a making sure that the children have plenty of work to do (hopefully this means challenging) and 3) that there are "quite a few" other high level children in this class (great because DD is peer motivated).

Many other things were said but DH and I feel better that we've gone on record with our concerns. The school is also setting up a time next week (before school starts) for DH and I to meet with the teacher and express our concerns to her directly.

We were told to give it a few weeks and see how it goes. I think that we can live with that!

Thanks again for all the suggestions and keep your fingers crossed that 2nd grade is a much better year!