Going next week - thinking of cxl'ing

[SnowandMittens]

I say get a babysitter for them and take the 8 year old. Haha.

All kidding aside, I clearly remember being that age and having my mom come to me and auctually explain why she needed me to change. She's a tricky lady and it was more of a plea for help than blaming me for anything. "Please, please help me out with housework tomorrow. I'm just so stressed and if you can help me, I'll extend cerfew by an hour if you want to go out the next night."

Small things, but it made me realize, um, duh, my mom is human.

If they're fond of the 8 year old, then get them on your side to make this the best trip ever for the 8 year old. See if that gets them in shape.

 

[rszdtrvl]

It's a rough time, there's a good book about it called The Rollercoaster Years by Giannetti and Sagarese, you could try the library or it's on Amazon.

Thank you for the recommendation of the book. I also am dealing with a 13-year old with what I am calling "hormone issues" who has been diagnosed with ADHD and Aspergers.

I read reviews and ordered it from Amazon.com for only $4 shipped!

 

[lilybrooke14]

Just wanted to note that my older sister was supposed to go to France with her high school French club. She was having some behavior issues (sneaking out) and generally being disrespectful. She seemed to be under the impression that my mom wasn't serious when she said there was no way she was paying all that money to send her to France if my sister was going to act like an ungrateful brat. She just kept it up. Mom and dad warned her several times, and finally told her she wasn't going. My sister was shocked! It's been over 20 years, and she's still shocked! She still can't believe they were "so mean."

I knew this story when it came time for my high school trip to Europe. I was an angel.

 

[bellebud]

I just read PP about the cell phones.I think I would take them so you can keep track of each other,safety issue.

as i was typing about the 'leave the cell phones home', this did cross my mind. If there's a way to have them take them, but only for safety purposes, I'd do that. We "lost" my dd10 at disney last october (she wasn't lost at all, she was w/ my sil, but I didn't know that for a very long 5 minutes)... anyway, I did wish she had a cell phone on her at the time. I'm having both my dd10 and ds8 take their cell phones on our trip next week. but there's no issues yet w/ friends, behavior, etc *yet*.

I've found when we get away from everything and everybody, just the 4 of us, all of the craziness gets left at home. It's nice to seem normal for a few days.

Just wanted to note that my older sister was supposed to go to France with her high school French club. She was having some behavior issues (sneaking out) and generally being disrespectful. She seemed to be under the impression that my mom wasn't serious when she said there was no way she was paying all that money to send her to France if my sister was going to act like an ungrateful brat. She just kept it up. Mom and dad warned her several times, and finally told her she wasn't going. My sister was shocked! It's been over 20 years, and she's still shocked! She still can't believe they were "so mean."

I knew this story when it came time for my high school trip to Europe. I was an angel.

good for your mom for sticking to her guns. but that was a trip w/ friends, which I would say cancel. This is a family trip, so the bonding time might be just what they need.

 

[PinkRhombus]

Sorry, I don't consider this normal. I have a dd16 and dd14 and we have had our share of fights and they never pulled crap like this.

The bit about threatening to jump out of the car and running away because she was picked up early???? That is NOT normal behavior. Arguing and bickering and complaining about how the parent is so awful and embarassing...yes...but not to the extent the OP mentioned.

I'd either only take the 8 year old, or find a way to make it up to him later.

 

[LadyTrampScamp&Angel]

Thank you for the recommendation of the book. I also am dealing with a 13-year old with what I am calling "hormone issues" who has been diagnosed with ADHD and Aspergers.

I read reviews and ordered it from Amazon.com for only $4 shipped!

You are welcome That's a great price and I hope it helps.

 

[sillysully]

Wow - thank you all so much for the advice and encouragement. I haven't been back in a few days to look at these and finally am sitting down tonight after dealing with another frustrating day. I am definitely going to get the books recommended and I think going does make sense in that she'll be away from friends and we could use the family time (I hope)! I wish I had girlfriends close by like all of you that I could turn to! And I am definitely leaving the phone home. Thanks again!!!