getting my "tubes tied"

[fitzy819]

Have you heard about Essure?

http://essure.co.uk/Default.aspx

This is copied and pasted from their website... they can describe it a lot better than I can

"The Essure procedure is the ideal contraceptive solution for women whose families are complete. It is a cutting-edge technology that liberates you from your temporary contraceptive regimen and enables you to fully enjoy your relationship with your partner and your children.

Trusted by women and doctors for over 10 years, Essure works with your body to create a natural, permanent barrier against pregnancy. This gentle procedure can be performed in a clinic or outpatient setting in just minutes.
Essure offers women what no contraception ever has

* No cutting, burning or scarring
* No going under general anaesthesia
* No hormones
* No guessing - your doctor can confirm when you can rely on Essure for contraception
* Freedom from the pain and recovery time of a tubal ligation
* Short procedure time - Essure only takes about 10 minutes to perform

You'll never have to worry about unplanned pregnancy again

Essure blocks the sperm and egg from meeting, so unlike some coils, conception cannot occur. Additionally, unlike oral contraceptives, rings and the leading coil, Essure does not contain hormones to interfere with your natural menstrual cycle. Your periods should more or less continue in their natural state.

The Essure procedure is permanent and NOT reversible. Therefore, you should be sure you do not want children in the future."

 

[Liberty Belle]

Sorry but that comment made me LOL. A man who's in a serious relationship with a woman, has kids, is NOT going to use condoms. That's one of the benefits of a relationship.

If she doesn't want to get the tubal, she can use BC.

Guess again. A mature man who knows that's the best contraception for the both of them will.

 

[canopynut66]

my youngest baby is almost 12, and i'm 39......i'm considering having a tubal. i only know 1 person that had it done, and it was done when she had a c-section. i'm wondering about the surgery, scars, recovery, etc......

just the fact that i'm considering it makes me kinda sad. i always wanted 4 kids, have 3. which really is fine with me. pregnancy, as much as i loved it, just did not agree with me. i KNOW i need to have the tubal....sigh

Is much easier and safer for husband to have it done and they can go to work the same day. but mine would not so had it done years ago and had no problems with tubal other than from the gas they use and that was very uncomfortable. was down a week. My grown daughter just it done month ago and she went in early morning and home by noon felt fine but had to take easy couple of days.

 

[HelenePA]

Sorry but that comment made me LOL. A man who's in a serious relationship with a woman, has kids, is NOT going to use condoms. That's one of the benefits of a relationship.

If she doesn't want to get the tubal, she can use BC.

Ut oh dont tell dh this... there are days I think we are done others I get weak and say I want another, he isn't sure either... I cant use bc it messes me up and gives me AF most of the month... I'm pretty sure he'd rather not deal with that...

as for the essure... my friend had it done awhile ago... she's due in feb with her 3rd boy... just sayin!

 

[roliepolieoliefan]

My husband of 18 years is in it for the long haul, but doesn't believe in surgical permanent birth control so he isn't getting it done. Doesn't mean he isn't committed to the marriage.

yep, we are in year 26 now...pretty committed but my DH would not get snipped. I had no problem getting the tubal..pretty minor surgery compared to the one I had to GET pregnant in the first place.

So he doesn't believe in it, but its OK for you to do it?

 

[proud_canadian]

To the OP, I would seriously think about canceling. You are in a new relationship, and who knows what the future will hold. You may change your mind and want to have more children in the future. There are many other options for birth control in the meantime. What about an IUD?

I would think that surgical birth control should be used more in a permanent, long term relationship, such as a marriage.

That being said, I thought about getting my tubes tied because I had two c-sections, so thought about getting it done during my 2nd one. However, my OB asked me about my period history and told me I was not a good candidate, because my periods are very heavy and difficult to begin with. He said he would do it, but didn't think I would be happy with it, as he told me I would have a good chance of my periods changing for the worse afterwards, and if I already wasn't happy, I really wouldn't be happy after.

My DH had a vasectomy, drove home from the procedure, watched TV the rest of the day (I kept telling him to sit down and rest!!) and we spent the weekend lounging around the pool. Back to work on Monday (he had it done on a Friday). Never even took a tylenol! Long term everything has been the same as before, and he notices no difference nor do I.

Good luck, but I'd think long and hard if that is really what you want to do now at this point in your life.

 

[MizTink]

To the OP, I would seriously think about canceling. You are in a new relationship, and who knows what the future will hold. You may change your mind and want to have more children in the future. There are many other options for birth control in the meantime. What about an IUD?

I would think that surgical birth control should be used more in a permanent, long term relationship, such as a marriage.

That being said, I thought about getting my tubes tied because I had two c-sections, so thought about getting it done during my 2nd one. However, my OB asked me about my period history and told me I was not a good candidate, because my periods are very heavy and difficult to begin with. He said he would do it, but didn't think I would be happy with it, as he told me I would have a good chance of my periods changing for the worse afterwards, and if I already wasn't happy, I really wouldn't be happy after.

My DH had a vasectomy, drove home from the procedure, watched TV the rest of the day (I kept telling him to sit down and rest!!) and we spent the weekend lounging around the pool. Back to work on Monday (he had it done on a Friday). Never even took a tylenol! Long term everything has been the same as before, and he notices no difference nor do I.

Good luck, but I'd think long and hard if that is really what you want to do now at this point in your life.

see, that's just it. i'm thinking that at this point in my life it WOULD be better to have something permanent. i loved being pregnant, but i was near death (hyperemesis) for several months with each of 3 pregnancies. it really took a toll on my body too. and i'm 39 years old. my kids are a little older, and i have 1 grandchild. even if i don't stay in this relationship, i don't think i should get pregnant again. if we do stay together, he's even older than me at 46. by the time we would decide to have a baby, we would be too old, in my opinion....
hmmm....
i really am trying to reassure myself. if i was physically able, i have a feeling i WOULD get pregnant, against my better judgment!!!

 

[JoiseyMom]

Sorry but that comment made me LOL. A man who's in a serious relationship with a woman, has kids, is NOT going to use condoms. That's one of the benefits of a relationship.

If she doesn't want to get the tubal, she can use BC.

Seriously?? MY dh used condoms for YEARS! His choice, since the pill and I didn't agree. He wanted me off the pill.

A REAL MAN will do what is best for his wife/partner and not be a selfish blank!!

 

[roliepolieoliefan]

see, that's just it. i'm thinking that at this point in my life it WOULD be better to have something permanent. i loved being pregnant, but i was near death (hyperemesis) for several months with each of 3 pregnancies. it really took a toll on my body too. and i'm 39 years old. my kids are a little older, and i have 1 grandchild. even if i don't stay in this relationship, i don't think i should get pregnant again. if we do stay together, he's even older than me at 46. by the time we would decide to have a baby, we would be too old, in my opinion....
hmmm....
i really am trying to reassure myself. if i was physically able, i have a feeling i WOULD get pregnant, against my better judgment!!!

But there are things you can get now that would last long term and not be permanent. Even though DH has a V, my OB /GYN suggested a Mirena for me to help with that time of the month.

My OB/GYN has one and she loves it.

 

[NikitaZee]

Seriously?? MY dh used condoms for YEARS! His choice, since the pill and I didn't agree. He wanted me off the pill.

A REAL MAN will do what is best for his wife/partner and not be a selfish blank!!

Whether or not a man chooses to get a vasectomy or not is not what makes him a 'real man'. That would actually not even make my list AT ALL as to what makes a man a man.

 

[cm8]

So he doesn't believe in it, but its OK for you to do it?

as well?

 

[BCDisneyFanatic]

Whether or not a man chooses to get a vasectomy or not is not what makes him a 'real man'. That would actually not even make my list AT ALL as to what makes a man a man.

The 'real man' comment was in response to the PP who said that NO man would ever use condoms in a longterm relationship. I agree with Joiseymom that any man that would refuse to use a condom when his SO can't use hormonal birth control is pretty pathetic. Of course it's not ideal, but it's better than an undesired pregnancy.

 

[NikitaZee]

The 'real man' comment was in response to the PP who said that NO man would ever use condoms in a longterm relationship. I agree with Joiseymom that any man that would refuse to use a condom when his SO can't use hormonal birth control is pretty pathetic. Of course it's not ideal, but it's better than an undesired pregnancy.

My apologies - I thought the comment was aimed at men who didn"t want a vasectomy. Sorry 'bout that!

 

[tlbwriter]

For the record: Vasectomies can be reversed, tubal ligations generally cannot.

Tubal ligations can be reversed. However, women who have undergone tubal ligation can do IVF and bypass their tubes altogether, and they have a high success rate (higher than the average patient doing IVF). At least one clinic reports that IVF after tubal ligation in an otherwise-fertile couple is cheaper and more successful than reversing the tubal ligation.

And here is some interesting info on vasectomy reversal from Johns Hopkins that says approximately 10% of men with vasectomies decide later that they would like them reversed (I had no idea the number was so high) and that the average pregnancy rate after reversal is 60% (depending on the woman's fertility, of course).

 

[okeydokey]

So he doesn't believe in it, but its OK for you to do it?

Well I haven't done it yet and actually he doesn't believe I should do it either. However, he makes the decisions for his body and I make them for mine. I am planning on doing the essure procedure this spring. I have accepted his decision not to surgically alter his body and he has accepted my decision to surgically alter mine.

 

[NikitaZee]

Well I haven't done it yet and actually he doesn't believe I should do it either. However, he makes the decisions for his body and I make them for mine. I am planning on doing the essure procedure this spring. I have accepted his decision not to surgically alter his body and he has accepted my decision to surgically alter mine.

 

[KiKi Mouse]

haha! nope, he's scared to do it!!

He should talk to other guys about it then.

DH had it done when our last baby was a few months old. We agreed that when I was pregnant if I would need a c-section I would have a tubal and if I didn't then he would have the big V.

It's a quick and easy procedure for men compared to what it is for women. A day or so off work for guys and a day of sitting with a bag of peas between his legs...lol Much better than the surgery for women!

Just curious, what is he scared of?

 

[Anjelica]

I was 29 when I got my tubes tied. I had it done during the birth of my second child via a c-section. I remember my doctor talked to both my husband and I in the office about our decision and made it very very clear it is "mostly" permanent and most insurances will not pay to reverse it if we changed our minds. As I am on the operating table vomiting my heart out (which I did the previous 9 months) he asked me one more time if I was sure and I said yes...

I can't speak to the recovery from having a TL without a c-section but what I can speak to is the finality of it. We "may" have wanted a third child but my pregnancies were horrible. It was somewhat easier to deal with being sick every single day basically tied to the couch when I was pregnant with my daughter, but when I was pregnant with my son and again very immobile and constantly sick (with hospitalization) it was hard to see the impact on my then 3 year old daughter. I knew then I wasn't going to have another child, at least biologically, again.

It's been over 4 years since I had the TL and I haven't regretted it at all. If I didn't have a C-Section my husband had already volunteered to get a Vasectomy.

Good Luck!!!