FW Boats-Ladies Sit First

[greytmom]

The biggest problem is that they bang into our Heads on a daily basis that everyone should be treated equally. That we should not offend anyone by making conssions to them. To be polically correct in everything we do.

Well I think the OP offended the ladies he was trying to help and guilted them into doing something they didn't want to do on their own.

I'm raising DD to fend for herself and not depend on a MANS Honor to get what she wants . If she wants a seat she will either ask for it herself or just wait . If she wants a boy to open the door for her she will ask him to do so then it's up to him what his next step will be.

It has nothing to do with respect and everything to do with the way things are in this day and age.

Well I am raising my DD who is 9 to be independent as well, but I also would hope that a boy/man is respectful to her and open car doors, offer a seat to her, etc.
I would not have been offended in the least if I was on the boat with Stacktester. My DH would have done the same thing, that's the way he was brought up, and that's how are children are raised as well. Time after time, I get compliments how how well mannered and polite my children are. There's nothing wrong with having manners and being respectful to others/elders this day and age, I'm sorry. That's no excuse!

 

[Mr Man]

And I'm sure you would have had to get the switch off the tree and proceeed out to the woodshed to accept your punishment. This is a different day and age and I could agree that people could be more courteous to others but we have to adjust.

We will have to agree to disagree on this then. I believe that chivalry is never out of fashion and our 2 sons are being raised to honor this core belief.

I do agree your point about understanding the society we live in. It is the only one we have after all. This is a valid point.

It is ironic to me that these same social mores regarding decency in social interactions we are debating generally come from a time period in this country that was extremely intolerant to anyone existing outside the majority social group (take your pick: the list is long). I was not sorry to see that go away. As a balancing thought, can you imagine John Wayne refusing to help a senior citizen and then equivocating about it? I can't.

I think social mores move as a pendulum swings (back and forth). Once it reaches an extreme on one end, it thens moves back to the other side (takes a while though). How else can we explain our move from extremely hierachal society post WW2, to the permissive 60's to (well, let's ignore the 70's-corduroy bell bottoms????), to the greedy 80's to the sometimes excessively politically correct societyy we currently tolerate (and appear to be expected to tolerate everything/anything in it).

Then again, maybe I am reading too much in to responses on this thread. The Golden Rule (which seems to have made it in some form into every major religion on the planet (except for Environmentalism & Communism but I repeat myself hehe), covers this nicely. Of course, it pre-supposes that the person would want to be corrected publicly when they are in the wrong. I know I would.

 

[Gatordad]

And I'm sure you would have had to get the switch off the tree and proceeed out to the woodshed to accept your punishment. This is a different day and age and I could agree that people could be more courteous to others but we have to adjust.

age or no age, we shouldn't have to adjust to poor manners. What Stacktester did was correct...... He acted like a man's man.

"I'm raising DD to fend for herself and not depend on a MANS Honor to get what she wants . If she wants a seat she will either ask for it herself or just wait . If she wants a boy to open the door for her she will ask him to do so then it's up to him what his next step will be.

It has nothing to do with respect and everything to do with the way things are in this day and age."

fend for herself???? that's the biggest bunch of baloney I've heard in a long time. Yes, my daughter wants to go to College and establish her own identity and career, but I can guarantee, that she won't date someone who doesn't respect her and open doors automatically.....


Disney brings out the worst in people.... it's memememememememe, i spent two years vacation money to come look at a mouse, and I'm going to get my vacation in whether I knock someone over or not....

The best thing about the south is the fact that manners are used here as well as courtesy.....

 

[David Johnson]

We will have to agree to disagree on this then. I believe that chivalry is never out of fashion and our 2 sons are being raised to honor this core belief.

I do agree your point about understanding the society we live in. It is the only one we have after all. This is a valid point.

It is ironic to me that these same social mores regarding decency in social interactions we are debating generally come from a time period in this country that was extremely intolerant to anyone existing outside the majority social group (take your pick: the list is long). I was not sorry to see that go away. As a balancing thought, can you imagine John Wayne refusing to help a senior citizen and then equivocating about it? I can't.

I think social mores move as a pendulum swings (back and forth). Once it reaches an extreme on one end, it thens moves back to the other side (takes a while though). How else can we explain our move from extremely hierachal society post WW2, to the permissive 60's to (well, let's ignore the 70's-corduroy bell bottoms????), to the greedy 80's to the sometimes excessively politically correct societyy we currently tolerate (and appear to be expected to tolerate everything/anything in it).

Then again, maybe I am reading too much in to responses on this thread. The Golden Rule (which seems to have made it in some form into every major religion on the planet (except for Environmentalism & Communism but I repeat myself hehe), covers this nicely. Of course, it pre-supposes that the person would want to be corrected publicly when they are in the wrong. I know I would.

Very well put Mr. Man. I don't disagree that chivalry does not have it's place in society today. But should we expect the same chivalry in a society that allows women to fly fighters in combat, expects the same salary as men for the same job, ( as they should) etc. etc., as the same chivalry that we excepted 40-50 years ago. Maybe the degrees have changed a little over time? My biggest beef with this poster and those that are stating a man has to to what a man has to do regarding shameful behavior is that, was the response to this " shameful behavior" appropriate for the for the stated act? I say no it wasn't. We were not there to see what happened prior to this incident so we really can't make a good sound judgement. We only have one side to base our judgement on. I guess i would have to say that there are degrees of shameful behavior that require " public shaming" as one poster put it and then there are those that would require us to just mind our own business. Hope i made a little sense.

 

[Rhonda]

Hi everyone!

I have to step in here to say, that it's great to have a topic that raises some interesting ideas! But, please refrain from personal attacks.

Personally, I am touched every time a man offers a seat to me on a bus, boat, monorail, whatever. And, I'm a young (fairly), independent, healthy woman, and have no problem walking around the parks for 14 hours straight.

I will usually turn them down, and keep standing, because I know they are probably as tired as I am. But, it's always nice to know that good manners still do exist! And, I thank them profusely when they ask!

 

[IDoBelieveInFairies]

I am hoping that my kids have been raised to notice someone needing a seat and offering their own, opening a door, etc. Caring about others and common courtsey are not from a different era. As a parent and teacher, I hope I can help kids see beyond themselves and lead by my own example. It doesn't take a "switch" to teach such lessons.

 

[stacktester]

Hi everyone!

I have to step in here to say, that it's great to have a topic that raises some interesting ideas! But, please refrain from personal attacks.

Personally, I am touched every time a man offers a seat to me on a bus, boat, monorail, whatever. And, I'm a young (fairly), independent, healthy woman, and have no problem walking around the parks for 14 hours straight.

I will usually turn them down, and keep standing, because I know they are probably as tired as I am. But, it's always nice to know that good manners still do exist! And, I thank them profusely when they ask!

Rhonda I've disagreed on a few posts you have locked before but I think the point was delivered. I am surprised as to some posts I saw. I am 41 so I don't see me way far out from a generation that knows right from wrong. I just know that I respect other people no matter what age and I would've thought people would have some respect. I come from farming grandparents from Mississippi and WW II Veteran Grandparents that taught us to be gentlemen. Everybody has their own opinions though and I respect that. I will continue to stand my ground though and respect ladies and seniors on a high level.

 

[dizneydiva2005]

hmmm, give up a seat for a lady? The boat you were on wasn't the Titantic!! LOL it's a WDW boat- sooooooo....

Being that am a female in my late 30's I wouldn't expect a man to give up his seat for me. I don't see why a man has to give up his seat for me- considering he was on the boat first and most likely sitting with his family. IF a man was so kind as to offer me a seat- I would turn him down but thank him for the offer.

Now for a Sr. my hubby and son have given up seats- or someone that clearly needed to sit... but not just because she's a she.

Now let a man walk through a door and not hold it for me - that's a different topic all together. Sure you can still walk through first, no biggie, but not to hold it until I get there....
Men it is very rude for you not to hold a door.

 

[dizneydiva2005]

I will continue to stand my ground though and respect ladies and seniors on a high level.

Now don't get me wrong- men should respect ladies {not that all of them deserve it} and Sr. My hubby and oldest son are very polite and respectful of ladies and Sr. It makes me proud. But when it comes to them sitting on a boat or monorail- over a woman who was in the back of the line, standing... oh well, if she has to sit she can wait for the next boat and get a seat.
My hubby and I have actually locked horns on this- he was always telling my son to get up so a lady could sit- ahhhh no... sorry, I don't feel my son always has to give up his seat for a lady- now if she's a SR or a person of need, then yes, but not just because. My hubby will give up his seat- which as sweet as that is, it annoys me. Then I'm stuck next to her and usually she has a kid screaming on her lap. Geez, thanks.

Sorry that's just my thoughts- and again I am a female who is saying this.

 

[Cndrsgrl]

Stacktester, good for you.

I would hope the point that should be made is whether we are young or old, male or female, we should respect others. As a female, I have given my seat to many elderly if it was needed. Why? Because I was raised that way to respect my elders. I still get teased for calling them Mr or Mrs. even though I've been told I could use their first names. I have tried to teach my daughters the same values which I believe again in respecting others. I think Walt would have wanted us to do the same while visiting his parks.

 

[stacktester]

hmmm, give up a seat for a lady? The boat you were on wasn't the Titantic!! LOL it's a WDW boat- sooooooo....

Being that am a female in my late 30's I wouldn't expect a man to give up his seat for me. I don't see why a man has to give up his seat for me- considering he was on the boat first and most likely sitting with his family. IF a man was so kind as to offer me a seat- I would turn him down but thank him for the offer.

Now for a Sr. my hubby and son have given up seats- or someone that clearly needed to sit... but not just because she's a she.

Now let a man walk through a door and not hold it for me - that's a different topic all together. Sure you can still walk through first, no biggie, but not to hold it until I get there....
Men it is very rude for you not to hold a door.

Thanks Diva. I wasn't talking about 20, 30 or 40 y/o women but just the common sense of an older, disabled or pregnant woman. I'm trying not to stick my foot in my mouth but I probably will. I just believe an older lady deserves a little consideration as do all women no matter their age. I just want to be clear that I wasn't saying let's play musical chairs and all the men and boys stand up so every female is sitting. I was refering to the obvious. I'm digging, digging, digging myself deeper lol and I ain't gonna like what I hear back. Let's just be nice to people and show some respect to our elders. They've paved the way for us and deserve a nice gesture here and there.

 

[Gatordad]

I agree wholeheartedly. The lack of common courtesy and manners at Disney is appaling.

 

[David Johnson]

Thanks Diva. I wasn't talking about 20, 30 or 40 y/o women but just the common sense of an older, disabled or pregnant woman. I'm trying not to stick my foot in my mouth but I probably will. I just believe an older lady deserves a little consideration as do all women no matter their age. I just want to be clear that I wasn't saying let's play musical chairs and all the men and boys stand up so every female is sitting. I was refering to the obvious. I'm digging, digging, digging myself deeper lol and I ain't gonna like what I hear back. Let's just be nice to people and show some respect to our elders. They've paved the way for us and deserve a nice gesture here and there.

I don't believe anyone would deny that it would be appropriate to give up a seat for any disabled, pregnant or older person. Once again, as described in the original post, was the reaction to the described incident appropriate as it was described in the original post? I say NO. I'm thinking, and this is just my opinion, but what one person thinks is a nice gesture then forcing what one person thinks is a nice gesture on someone else and then being as public as the original poster said they were may have not necessarily been considered an appropriate manner in which to handle the situation. IMHO. I never had stated it is not a nice gesture to give up your seat to someone else that might need it but to berate someone else after they have had a long day at the parks because ,well for a second they may have not been thinking or it just may not have occurred to them, or they just are tired , is not the way to deal with this incident. Hope this is not seen as an attack. This is not my intent.

 

[djblu883]

I would offer my seat to someone that i felt needed it BUT if these people ladies, seniors can walk a theme park for 12-14 hours then standing for ten more minutes so they can get to their resort does not bother me too much. What i don't seem to get is why someone would create such a ruckus over such a petty thing as this and then take the time to justify their behavior by writing this thread after they are home is baffling to me. I would love to create a scene at the end of my day over a seat. Happy trails.

Too bad you feel that way. I was always taught to respect others and feel very much like the OP! I readily give my seat up to my elders or the families with small children...that is GOOD MANNERS...plain and simple...and I'm female!! I guess Chivalry isn't important...glad to see there are a few PRINCES left out there...Thank you Stacktester!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[djblu883]

The biggest problem is that they bang into our Heads on a daily basis that everyone should be treated equally. That we should not offend anyone by making conssions to them. To be polically correct in everything we do.

Well I think the OP offended the ladies he was trying to help and guilted them into doing something they didn't want to do on their own.

I'm raising DD to fend for herself and not depend on a MANS Honor to get what she wants . If she wants a seat she will either ask for it herself or just wait . If she wants a boy to open the door for her she will ask him to do so then it's up to him what his next step will be.

It has nothing to do with respect and everything to do with the way things are in this day and age.

I'm a VERY independent woman and have raised both a daughter and son to be as well. My son and daughter both will give up seats, open doors and will yes still say yes annnnd no Mam/Sir...Independence is good and make for a strong willed person...but you also want your daughter to be respected as a woman when she grows up....as I see it failure to teach that is why we have so many young who don't grow up with a good ethic in how to treat others...I treat others as I want to be treated....with respect and dignity...!!!!!!!!!!

 

[mamaloya]

Well David Johnson, I am so glad that I am not married to you. There is no way my husband would dare take that attitude. I don't care if they have been in the park for 12-14 hours and if they can do that then they can stand for 10 more minutes. Shame on you. Would you not carry a suitcase for a woman? If my husband sees a woman carrying something heavy he will offer help. My ds's (and my dd's as well) will help neighbors carry groceries in. I expect a man to hold a door for me. I am training my children to do the same. That is what is wrong with society. They no longer want to sacrifice anything for anyone. If she can stand 10 more minutes, why can't you? If it is just 10 minutes and not a big deal, why aren't you willing to stand instead. Oh, I forgot, you are entitled because YOU got there first. How shameful.

Oh, and just because you don't think that they should have kept their kids up that late to be in the parks is also no reason to punish them by refusing to let a mom or dad carrying a child sit down. How selfish and judgemental of you. You say don't judge me for my opinion on not giving up my seat, yet you are judging the parents that are up late with their kids. A little hypocrital don't ya think. If you want to be understood for your apparent (or misunderstood) rudeness, why don't you understand that a parent wanted their kids to see the fireworks? Like I tell my kids when they are being rude or selfish... "Get over yourself!"

Don't jump on the OP who was a gentleman and stood up for what he believes in. At least he did something instead of just complaining about it. How many people come back and complain about how rude someone was? They did not say anything but are steamed and eaten up about it now. Some of those things you would even agree are rude. Maybe if people started speaking up, people would stop being so rude. It is when people do nothing that society is allowed to degenerate.

As to the OP and the other gentlemen on this forum. Kudos to you and you will always get my respect and gratitude.

I am sorry if this post seems argumentative. I usually stay out of hot debates, but, having been the pregnant woman holding a toddler while dh is holder another one and desperately needing a seat (I was in a wheelchair in the parks BTW) I just could not keep my mouth shut here. We need to bring back some semblance of manners back to this culture.

 

[des1954]

And I'm sure you would have had to get the switch off the tree and proceeed out to the woodshed to accept your punishment. This is a different day and age and I could agree that people could be more courteous to others but we have to adjust.

David---OMG!!! Were you raised in Palmetto?? Most of my DH's family lives and grew up there & their Nanny made them go cut their own switches!! (LOL) If it wasn't to HER liking, she went and cut one...and I've heard that you didn't want Nanny to do THAT!!! (Ouch!!)

Remember Smith's Department Store? It was owned by DH's uncle, and DBil was the manager in the years b-4 the store closed and became a Walgreen's.

 

[stacktester]

UH OH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Momma has spoken lol. Calm down Sandra before Rhonda throws us all out of here lol. This is a discussion and opinion board and I think Moma was just being honest so hopefully Rhonda will let this keep going.

I thought we had some heated golf cart threads on here. This thread might have some people flying cross country to make a visit on some people lol. Just kidding. I just wanted to bring to light what I thought was a good rule of thumb. Rhonda at least wait til Colson has his say before you lock it up lol. I thought he would've posted by now.

 

[rapriebe]

Well David Johnson, I am so glad that I am not married to you. There is no way my husband would dare take that attitude. I don't care if they have been in the park for 12-14 hours and if they can do that then they can stand for 10 more minutes. Shame on you. Would you not carry a suitcase for a woman? If my husband sees a woman carrying something heavy he will offer help. My ds's (and my dd's as well) will help neighbors carry groceries in. I expect a man to hold a door for me. I am training my children to do the same. That is what is wrong with society. They no longer want to sacrifice anything for anyone. If she can stand 10 more minutes, why can't you? If it is just 10 minutes and not a big deal, why aren't you willing to stand instead. Oh, I forgot, you are entitled because YOU got there first. How shameful.

Oh, and just because you don't think that they should have kept their kids up that late to be in the parks is also no reason to punish them by refusing to let a mom or dad carrying a child sit down. How selfish and judgemental of you. You say don't judge me for my opinion on not giving up my seat, yet you are judging the parents that are up late with their kids. A little hypocrital don't ya think. If you want to be understood for your apparent (or misunderstood) rudeness, why don't you understand that a parent wanted their kids to see the fireworks? Like I tell my kids when they are being rude or selfish... "Get over yourself!"

Don't jump on the OP who was a gentleman and stood up for what he believes in. At least he did something instead of just complaining about it. How many people come back and complain about how rude someone was? They did not say anything but are steamed and eaten up about it now. Some of those things you would even agree are rude. Maybe if people started speaking up, people would stop being so rude. It is when people do nothing that society is allowed to degenerate.

As to the OP and the other gentlemen on this forum. Kudos to you and you will always get my respect and gratitude.

I am sorry if this post seems argumentative. I usually stay out of hot debates, but, having been the pregnant woman holding a toddler while dh is holder another one and desperately needing a seat (I was in a wheelchair in the parks BTW) I just could not keep my mouth shut here. We need to bring back some semblance of manners back to this culture.

Great post. My sentiments exactly!! Kudos to you.

 

[mamaloya]

Sorry, I really don't intend to get this thread locked. I guess this is just a sore spot with me having been preggo and standing watching all the young and men sitting. I wish a man would have stood up for me and made someone get up. Now, most of the time I was offered a seat, but the couple of times I wasn't, it was awful. My dh is not a very assertive person so he would never say anything. All he did was kind of hold on to me and support me so I wasn't totally on my own feet.

Just remember that people who look able bodied may not be. I have some health issues even when I am not preggo and you can't tell it to look at me. They also have not necessarily been walking for 12-14 hours. I personally spend a lot of time sitting. When the others go on the rides that my heart does not allow me to ride, I sit and watch. I grab a drink and relax. Our last trip, ds, then 6, pushed me in a stroller in innoventions for a little while. (Boy did the CMs have fun with that!!)

One more comment while I am calm again, the time you would spend standing waiting for a bus is longer than you would spending standing on the bus or boat. Although, I have to admit that we sometimes sit on the ground at the bus stops while we wait if there are no benches or we are in the queue.

I apologize again for being so strong worded. Just please keep in mind that other people may not be as strong as you. Take a look in their face and you will see how badly they may need your seat. If they look like they are going to drop out, get up for them. If they look like they have had a little too much caffeine and can go a few more rounds, don't worry about it. Just please remember that a lot of times it is fellow guests than can make Disney World a magical place and as dissers we should help sprinkle some pixie dust whenever we can.