Full-time Working Moms???

[justjulie]

I work 37.5 hours and commute over an hour each way every day. Sometimes I wonder how the heck I do it too but everything gets done - eventually. My kids are 10 and 15 and are involved in sports 4 times a week so it's definitely busy. Throw in school commitments and daycare meetings and there are times I could sleep for a week!

Here are some things I founde (somewhat) helpful.

No one does anything until all school notes and agendas have been handed over

School backpacks are packed and ready to go the night before

Everyone has to do SOMETHING to help (whether it be helping with dinner or clean up or helping each other with homework - something)

I used to try and pre-make meals on the weekend but then I ended up in the kitchen all weekend and was resentful. Now I do what I can - like pre-browning ground beef before I put it in the freezer so I can microwave it and pop it into Hamburger Helper, spaghetti sauce or chili.

If I'm making macaroni and cheese, double the batch and feed the freezer.

If anyone else has helpful hints, pass them along, I know I could use some ...

 

[Nancy]

It's amazing to me how we've all made it work. I too feel alone much of the time... I only have ONE other Mom friend who works full-time. Everyone else has chosen to stay home full time (or go back to work on a VERY part time basis... like 2 6 hour days per week, because they are so passionate about what they do). I could care less about what I do... I'm actually incredibly disinterested in my job that I can't motivate most of the time! But I work in sales and can make good money AND work from home... so I just try to focus on the positives.

But it can get so upsetting when my Full-time SAHM mom friends complain that they have too MANY activities or other friends in their playgroup. My son is 2 and we've never been to a playgroup

It's also great to see how other people like us have wacky schedules to make it work. My husband leaves for work at 1:45am and gets home at around 11am... so he spends the afternoons with my son (who then only has to be in daycare from 9am - 2:30pm). It's tough never having 'alone' time as a couple.

Lastly, I just want to say how incredibly awed I am by the working single Moms out there. You should all be so proud of yourselves. I don't know how you do it. As your kids get older they will worship you for the sacrifices you've made.

Too bad we're all scattered around the country (and world!) so we can't have a 'playgroup' of our own...

Best post of the whole thread so far! Hurray for us! We have made choices and sacrifices to do what we need to do for our families, while what we do isn't everyone's cup-a-tea, it is what works for us!

FWIW, my kids are now 13, 16 and 18 and they have NEVER had a playdate either! For the fve years I did overnights I hardly saw my husband, he left for work as soon as I got home and by the time he came home and we had dinner, I went to sleep for a short nap before heading off to work again. Now the the girls are older it became an issue of needing to be home at night to be their taxi driver, it is so nice when they start to drive themself!

to the single Mom's, I don't know how you guys do it, it is hard enough with a partner, I couldn't imagine going it alone.

 

[Eeyore'sthebest]

This is a great thread. I'm married but the working spouse. My poor DD doesn't get invited to playdates because the SAHMs are uncomfortable having my DH there. One mother's whine was that she couldn't breastfeed in front of him. Umm, okay..... They were in a public park and there were other people there. So they are excluded and she doesn't understand why.

I solved the Girl Scout troop dilemma. I became the leader. I hold meetings in my home every other Saturday. It forces me to pick up the house a little better than normal. We cleared some space in the basement, put a large folding table and chairs, a $4 bookcase from a yard sale for supplies and BAM instant girl scout meeting place. I found out that you pick the meeting place and time if you're the leader. Its great. I probably put more time into it than is required but I was a girl scout myself and have a tendency to be geeky.

My Dsis recently became a single parent. I am in awe of everything that she does. It truly is amazing that she is able to keep all those ball juggling at once.

 

[Sandy V.]

I work from home 2 weeks out of every 3 for a legal publishing and information company. I go into the office that 3rd week because I share some supervisory duties with 2 others, and we take turns being in the office.

My kids are DD18 and DS16. I have been employed outside the home for all but DS's first year. I work mainly for the health and pension benefits that my company provides for our family because my husband has his own law practice, but I also work because I enjoy being around other adults, even if it's now mainly through cyberspace. Plus, we enjoy traveling together and my salary helps pay for that as well. I'm fortunate that I like my job and I have lots of flexibility.

Now that my teens can drive, it's so much easier, but I remember how exhausting it was to try and keep track of where they needed to be and when. I have always been the primary "keep things running smoothly at home" person because of the long hours my husband puts in at his business.

Plus, when they were sick, it was really hard before I was telecommuting. I missed 9 days of work in the fall 13 years ago when my kids had the chicken pox. DH was in trial during DS's episode, and 2 weeks later, when DD got them, he flew to North Carolina on a business trip. I had to call Kelly Assisted Living Services one afternoon to watch her because I HAD to go to a meeting! (our family lives 600 miles away). Thankfully, I was able to use a laptop to get some work done at home.

Single moms - you get a from me for all that you do. It's hard enough with 2 parents trying to raise them to be productive, tax-paying, non-axe-murdering adults!!

 

[cats7494]

I work full time...20 hours of my week are in the office and other 20 hours are from home.
I just had a baby recently so this arrangement has been truly a blessing. About 95% of my work is computer based so was a simple transition to work from home.

 

[mrsltg]

It's both physically and emotionally draining to be both parents at once. It is not a situation I would have chosen to get into, however, I wouldn't trade it for the world. I just wish more people would realize how lucky they are to not "have" to work, or to be able to spend time with their kids whenever they want to. It drives me bananas to see friends who have kids and don't work, who put their kids in daycare because they don't know what else to do with them. Be grateful for the time with your children, they are only young once!

I'm standing up and cheering for you!!!! My mom was a single mom and it was TOUGH! Keep fighting the good fight!

I'm a FT employee of an international bank and a FT mom and wife to the best three people in the world! I commute 30 miles each way and it's killer. Luckily I was able to restructure my hours and give up lunch so I only have to work 8 hours per day... Of course I still check my blackberry at home and have gotten on the computer on my own time when the need arises. I tell you what (I'm preaching to the choir, I know) this is no joke and it's definitely not what Ms. magazine makes it out to be! I still do the class cupcakes and what not, but it usually means I'm up late making sure it all gets done. More power to the superwomen we are!!!!

 

[lyzziesmom]

I'm standing up and cheering for you!!!!

Yay us! Nobody's ever cheered for me before!

 

[carone0318]

Hi working moms!

I also work full-time out of the house and I have 2 kids dd(9, will be 10 in Sept) and ds (5).

I am an inventory planner for an automotive company. Basically my job is to make sure that my warehouses are stocked around the country so that if a dealer needs to get a part for a car to be fixed, they have it in about 2 days. I like what I do and I like my paycheck even more. I make the same amount as my dh, so working really isn't an option for me because I am also a big contributor to the bill paying.

I do have a great work schedule 7-3pm. Dh does the morning routine and I do the picking up getting dinner ready routine. It works for us and everyone seems happy!

I hear what some of the other moms are saying about camp - camp costs are a killer!!!! Looking forward to September again just because the schedule is less hectic.