Feeling Sad And Need To Vent!!

[kerry34]

Well, I really want to cry. My mom is going with us on our vacation in April, which I started planning sometime last May. After changing our minds a few times on a place to stay, I brought up the cabins at FW. She said that was fine and I booked them. I have five kids so she was going to rent a cabin with my two older daughters and DH and I were renting one for the rest of us. Well, she came to me yesterday and told me she didnt really want to stay there. At first I kinda got mad about it because she really caught me off guard with this, especially with the trip so close. She said since she wasnt going to be going to some of the parks and would be alone for some of the days, she wanted to stay someplace she had stayed before, and was familiar with. I think personally it is a money thing, but I was not going to bring that up to her. I basically agreed to changing to an offsite resort. I also didnt want to start a big thing either because this will probably be the last time she goes with us for a while, and my kids are extremely close to her. All the kids were fine with this change. She asked them about it and they said it didnt matter to them at all where we stayed as long as we all went. DH basically said whatever I wanted to do was okay with him. I dont want to say it to anybody else, but I am really disappointed about this. I am still looking forward to my vacation, but I really wanted to stay onsite. This is the only place that I knew people would understand how I feel. I know once I am there we will still have so much fun, but for now it is tough. Thanks for listening everyone.

 

[Tiggerlover91]

Bless your heart!

Why can't you still stay onsite? Maybe 2 adjoining rooms at the Allstars since your family is so big. Has your mother ever stayed onsite? I hope everything works out for you.

 

[ceecee]

That is too bad. I love staying onsite so much better too. Maybe you could offer to pay the difference if it is a money thing.

 

[ADisneygirl]

A big hug to you. Yes, we here will understand your disappointment with not staying onsite. Why won't she stay at the cabins? She won't be alone every day. Did you try getting a quote for a value resort?

Anyhow, you are being the bigger person by shrugging it off for your mother's sake. Kudos to you. Have a magical trip! Afterall, you will be at the parks!

 

[kerry34]

Thanks for the support. It does really help. I did ask my mom about the Value resorts and she didnt seem to show any interest in staying there. Every other time we have gone we have stayed at Westgate villas. I think that she got used to having a bigger place and the pool being close to your back door, that kinda thing. The other big reason is that it wont cost her as much because we would be splitting the place at Westgate. She recently had a huge drop in her overtime at work and that has put a strain on her to some extent. She has not come out and said this, but I am around her enough to know. When we go, she will probably go to MK twice and probably MGM, and other than that she will stay at the resort by the pool.
Between the money and the cabins being alot smaller than what she is used to. I think that is the reason. Anyhow, I know once we are in those parks and I am having fun with my kids, it wont matter. Of course I havent mentioned to anyone that this will give me a very big reason to start planning an onsite trip right when we get back!!! Hehehe. One way or another I am going to get there!

 

[lizziepooh]

What do you have for transportation for eight of you? Does she realize that on site she could come and go from the parks herself if she got tired etc.? I can understand your disappointment. We really prefer being on site when possible, even if only in an all stars room.

 

[Tinkerbell58]

Can you start your vacation staying off-site and finish your vacation on Disney property?

 

[kerry34]

We are driving down in two cars, so getting around isnt an issue really. Since we will only be there seven days, changing resorts half way through would be more work for me than I really want. If it were just me and DH and maybe one child, it wouldnt be so bad. With five kids it is alot of stuff. My big concern with the change is leaving the parks in the afternoon for breaks. The place we are staying is just about a mile or so from the entrance of the park, but I have never left in the afternoon and gone back after a rest. The only one in the family who really needs this is one of my 5 yr old twins. The other one could go all day and night and stay smiling, but my other girl needs a nap when she is that busy like that or she will end up having a melt down. I dont know how easy or difficult this will be, but I will find out anyway.

 

[Ariel Wanna-be]

I don't really have any advice, but I just want you to know that I think it's great that you are being so accommodating, especially when it's something you've had your heart set on.

My MIL and SIL are coming with us on this trip ( ), and I'm making some concessions that I'm NOT at all happy about! So by posting on this thread, I'm hoping that some of your "lemons into lemonade" attitude will rub off on me!

Have a great trip!

 

[frannn]

vacation resort not being exactly what you had hoped for, other aspects of the trip more than make up for it. Maybe you could take whatever you save from staying offsite and use that as a nest egg towards your next trip without mom? Maybe this could turn into a good twist for you- would mom watch your kids while you and DH have an "adult" day at WDW? Have a wonderful trip!

 

[Mimi Q]

 

[tobias sampson]

Aren't you blessed to have a mom that wants to be involved with your life and your children's lives?! It was sweet of her to agree in the first place to pay for a place for herself and some of your kids. It is a shame that she cannot afford to do so. Maybe you could just pick up both of the cabins?

 

[kfeuer]

I do understand, but I hope it won't cloud your whole trip. We just got back from our first trip with extended family offsite, and it worked out better then I had hoped. We definitely went back to our house (we rented a pool house) mid-day, rested, then went back out. Honestly, driving took no more time then waiting for buses.

A suggestion--why don't you take the money you're saving and splurge on something cool at Disney you've always wanted to try, like an Illuminations cruise, special tour, princess tea, etc. Try an expensive restaurant you haven't been to before. Have a magical trip!

 

[swilshire]

Your kids would have great fun at Fort Wilderness, but if they don't mind, I'd let it go. To many of the parks the transportation from Fort Wilderness would probably take as long as driving from your off-site location.

You are blessed to have a grandparent who has the health and interest to spend time with your kids. My kids have not been so lucky as my parents are both gone and my in-laws don't have the health or resources to do anything like this with us.

There will be other trips and all too soon the kids will be gone and you can vacation however you want to.

Enjoy your trip. It will be marvelous wherever you stay.

Sheila

 

[pumpkinfish]

DH and I stayed at Westgate 2 yrs ago, and it wasn't bad going back to rest in the afternoon. It is really just right down the road, and not a long haul. I know how you are upset, because you had done all this planning and were "expecting" to stay onsite. I also know that this is just your initial reaction, and things will smooth over as the days get closer to WDW. I am happy that you are able to spend this time with your mother, as many are not as fortunate. It is also very big of you to be able to accomodate your mom's wishes. Cherish these times, because sadly, you never know if they will be had in the future.
I don't want to bring you down, so I apologize if I did. Just thinking about how neat it would be to be able to spend time with DH's mother at WDW (whether onsite or not). Unfortunately she died of breast cancer before we were married.

That's also great your family is in support of staying anywhere, as long as you can all be together! How great that is to hear!

 

[canwegosoon]

I hate that!!! But as many people have said you are lucky to have a grandparent that wants to go. WHo knows how many more times there will be. I know its hard...try to be happy that at least you all are still going. Many people here have family that could care less. Go and have a good time, at least you won't have to worry if she's ok back at the room.

 

[mickeyluv'r]

If I were you,I'd book the new room, but hold off on cancelling for now. Just in case she changes her mind again, or she opens up to you, and you find out for certain why she is uncomfortable staying in a new place. I know how challenging it can be to accommodate a large group. Last year I was very up front when planning a trip with everyone in my own large group, but everyone kept changing their minds about what they did/did not want to pay for. I think some people just need to let big ticket costs sink in. The kinks are even worse when my sister tries to book our annual trip to the beach in the summer. The funny thing is...everyone starts off uncertain, but we all end up going every summer. People change their minds at the last minute, because they don't want to be left out of the group. Also, people tend to like to feel like they are in control. Good luck! I'm sure in the end it will still be a great trip! Don't let this ruin your fun!

 

[kerry34]

I just wanted to thank all of you for your thoughts. I am feeling better now about things. Mom told me that she would love to watch the kids for me so DH and I can go out for a while and do something fun together. It's funny because so many of you have mentioned how lucky I am to have such a great grandmother to my children and that is exactly why I made the concession. I know how easily things can change in a family. My mom lost both of her parents between a 9th month period last year. My mom and I both lived with them through my whole childhood since my mom was single. My grandparents wanted me to have everything possible growing up. As a result we were all close. My mom watched my grandparents with me and they loved me as if I was their own. My grandfather passed away after a long tough battle with congestive heart failure, but my grandmother passes away very suddenly and unexpectedly last January. It was one of the most agonizing things I have ever been through...however its been just as hard watching my mom lose her closest companion. She has taken right after my grandmother with my kids, except I have five kids, not one. My kids adore her. I am truly blessed for myself and my children to have that much love, so even though I am a little bit dissapointed, I dont mind. Don't mean to be depressing talking about death and stuff on here, but when I read all these posts it just gave me that extra reminder of how lucky I am. Thanks everyone. I will post on the trip boards when I get home.

 

[pumpkinfish]

 

[SlightlyGoofy]

Kerry34, reading through your posts I am much taken with the loving family you have. I see that your mom is thinking of your feelings in being willing to spend money that she might possibly not have easily at hand to be able to spend time with you and the grands and help out where she can while you are understanding of her limitations and accepting as well. Kudos to you all.

Having made several trips, some with others and some just me and dh there is a big difference between the two. While I have many happy memories of the trips with others I seldom got to do what I wanted to do when I wanted to do it but when I go with dh I get to do everything I want cause he does not care. LOL Different trips but wonderful anyway. BTW, when you are finally able to go on your own and do things as you wish you will miss the confusion and the faces of those who have been with you before but then you know that already you smart lady.

Best wishes for a wonderful trip, magical memories and those unexpected surprises that are sure to come.

Slightly Goofy