Fear (Phobia) of Dogs - Some Questions (Possible Sensory Issues)

[Christine]

This is mainly for my own curiosity as I am perplexed by this.

My best friend has a DD (8) who is absolutely terrified of dogs. And I mean terrified. For the most part, we do not know why. When she was a baby, my friend did have two older dogs in the house. Probably by the time her DD was about 1 or 2, the dogs had passed away. So, the little girl only has very dim memories of these dogs and are probably more of what her parents have told her about the dogs. But she talks of these dogs as if she loved them. Occasionally, she has asked for a puppy. But then when she gets around even tiny little cute puppies, she won't go near it, won't touch it, and is terrified.

Yesterday, we school was closed but we all went to work. My friend asked if she could send her DD up to my house to stay with my 14 year old and 11 year old. It was for about 5 hours. At first I told her no because I didn't feel comfortable having her in the house with the dogs. One of my dogs is a bit on the aggressive side and I was worried how the dog would react with this terrified little girl (dogs can be funny when the smell fear). Also, she was at my house once before for a few hours and basically hid in the bathroom because of the dogs (which were outside).

Well, then I felt guilty because my friend and her DH really do so much for me. So I agreed to let her DD stay at the house yesterday and I would put the dogs in their crates for the day, behind a door, in the basement.

Everything went well yesterday. But, I guess my son kept pushing the girl to "see" and pet my smaller dog (she weighs ALL OF 10 LBS!!). Finally the little girl agrees that my son can bring the dog up. So he's carrying her up from the basement and my little dog is very excited and happy and wiggling. She is very friendly. The girl immediately runs into the bathroom and shuts the door. My son returned the dog to her crate. When he came back up, the girl was crying.

I guess I just really don't understand this phobia and what is the cause for it. My friend and I discuss it a lot as it has been problematic for her to go places (just about everyone has a dog). She has never had a bad incident with a dog. In her mind the little girl *thinks* she likes dogs. The only thing that my friend can come up with is that she thinks it is a "sensory" issue. This little girls has real issues with the way things feel on her skin (like new clothing), bright lights, flashing lights, loud noises. These things really bother her. So, my friend thinks that the actual phobia could be do to the fear of the way the dog feels or if it licks her or touches her.

Any thoughts on this?

 

[Twinkles6892]

I have a friend who is terrified of dogs, she doesn't even like to see my dog if she's in the kennel. We had a student at our school who was training a service dog last year and she would walk by him and the dog at certain points of the day, I think she ended up having to get her schedule changed so she never saw the dog...

I don't understand it either, but then, people don't understand my somewhat irrational fear of snakes.

 

[florida-again]

Firstly, it's great that you put the dogs away while the girl was there, that is really rare in a dog owner. I have a phobia of dogs and I've found most dog owners won't do this, or they do it and then let the dogs out halfway through my visit.

The thing with phobias is that they aren't rational. I know I've never had a bad experience with a dog, I couldn't tell you why I'm frightened of them, I just am.

As for this little girl, I don't think there's much use reading in to it, if she's scared she's scared, it won't really hurt anyone, I think being understanding that she's scared of them is enough, no real need to understand why - it probably wouldn't help

 

[Martha7]

The kids I've known who were afraid of dogs may have become that way because of their parents' fear of dogs. The parents will inadvertently instill a heightened (and perhaps irrational) fear by always warning them to be careful of dogs. I've tried very hard to avoid giving my kids my phobias!

 

[Rafiki Rafiki Rafiki]

Fear of dogs is a common phobia in children and adults. Psychologists use systematic desensitization to cure these types of problems.

It takes a lot of work and a long period of time, but with the help of an adult she can work through it.

Begin by talking with her about her fear. See if she can pinpoint what's making her scared. If she can't, use photos of dogs to talk about feelings that come up.

Then, let her in the room with a dog with the dog in a place where he/she can't get near the child. After she is comfortable there, allow the dog a little closer. This has to be done in several sessions. Make sure the dog is not agitated in any way...no squeeker toys, no other screaming kids.

Over a period of time, the girl will become more used to the idea that the dog won't hurt her. Eventually, you can allow her to pet the dog. Make sure the dog won't lick her in the beginning--that will come over time.

We went through this with our daughters, and it's frustrating for everyone, including the phobic child. But over time, she can overcome the issue. It just takes work and patience!

 

[klj27]

I have a 9 year old who has an extreme fear of dogs and lots of other things. There is no rational reason for her fear and she is beside herself with fear and anxiety when it comes to dogs. She went to therapy a year and a half ago and was diagnosed with an anxiety disorder. She was able to work through a lot of her fears (roller coasters, trying new things), but her fear of dogs got worse. Her therapist said that as she sonquered some of her fears they really were just pushed onto the fear of dogs. Unforturnately that fear has gotten worse not better. As she gets older I notice her asking questions that tell me she is worrying about a lot of things. I have an anxiety disorder (and I think my mother does as well) and it makes me so sad that I have passed this on to my daughter. At least she is able to talk to me about it and I will always get her the help she needs.

 

[golfgal]

The tag thing and the noise/light thing are very common with Sensory Disorders. There is a lot of information on the internet and most of the desensitising can be done at home. A lot of schools are now working with occupational/physical therapists that do sensory integration. I would highly recommend this book: The Out-of-Sync Child : Recognizing and Coping With Sensory Integration Dysfunction
Carol Stock Kranowitz

It does a good job of explaining different sensory issues and how to deal with them. It would be a good way to start. We did some sensory integration with our oldest and it really helped him.

 

[klj27]

I guess I should add that I don't think my daughter's fear has anything to do with sensory issues.

 

[florida-again]

Another thought for you Christine: If this girl will be spending some time at her house, if you gain her trust she might be more comfortable around your dogs. If you promise her you'll keep the dogs locked up and keep your promise, then after some time, she may trust you enough to let the dog in the room, because she'll trust you if you say you won't let the dog near her. Then once you've gained her trust on that, she might trust you to let the dog near her, because she'll trust you won't let it hurt her....

So as long as you ALWAYS keep your promise to her, over time she might break down the boundaries herself.

you see the pattern? I know my phobia is partly fear of the owner not stopping the dog from hurthing me. A dog owner who keeps their promise to me is the most likely to help me feel more comfortable in their house.

 

[klj27]

Another thought for you Christine: If this girl will be spending some time at her house, if you gain her trust she might be more comfortable around your dogs. If you promise her you'll keep the dogs locked up and keep your promise, then after some time, she may trust you enough to let the dog in the room, because she'll trust you if you say you won't let the dog near her. Then once you've gained her trust on that, she might trust you to let the dog near her, because she'll trust you won't let it hurt her....

So as long as you ALWAYS keep your promise to her, over time she might break down the boundaries herself.

you see the pattern? I know my phobia is partly fear of the owner not stopping the dog from hurthing me. A dog owner who keeps their promise to me is the most likely to help me feel more comfortable in their house.

We have friends who do this for our daughter. Some days it works and other days she is irrational about it. The thing that makes my daughter feel safe if a leash. If the dog is on a leash she feels there is some control in the situation. She could see the smallest dog sleeping and if it is not on a leash she will be afraid of it.

 

[Beth76]

A phobia is an irrational fear. I don't think there's any reason to find some deep seeded issue behind this. I have a phobia of spiders. Even the tiniest of spiders, I will have my husband come and "take care" of it. I also have a phobia of the dark. I can not walk down the hallway of my house without turning on a light. Seriously, the Scooby Doo ride at Six Flags scares me, because I'm afraid that someone is going to jump out of the darkness and grab me. Now tell me, how rational does that sound? I am very well aware that this is irrational behavior, but I can't do anything about it.

 

[Christine]

Thanks for all of your replies.

I do realize that phobias are irrational. I guess I was just trying to understand what it might be about the dog(s) that she is afraid of. I have known other people who are terrified of dogs but they have always said "when I was a little kid, my Grandmother's Chihauha went nuts on my for no reason..." and there is usually some basis for it.

As far as her parents causing the phobia, I doubt it. Both of them are BIG dog lovers and had dogs as long as I have known them. After their last two died of old age, they decided to take a break from dog ownership because the last two had been emotionally exhausting. So, my friend's daughter was a toddler when the dogs left. When they considered getting another dog (when the little girl was 5 or 6) the fear was there. They have tried, several times, to bring her around the neighbors who get new puppies (as the little girl says she wants to see them), but then she can't go through with it.

I do think the child has some anxiety issues and most definitely a sensory problem; however, she has never been diagnosed with anything because to the outside world, she copes very well. She is an excellent student and has lots of friends. It's at home where it all shows.

 

[golfgal]

I do think the child has some anxiety issues and most definitely a sensory problem; however, she has never been diagnosed with anything because to the outside world, she copes very well. She is an excellent student and has lots of friends. It's at home where it all shows.

The book I recommended does a good job explaining this. It basically says that kids can hold it together for so long, a few hours, a school day, what ever and when they no longer are able to contain themselves, they let go, usually at home because they work really hard not to do this at school. It will get to the point where the school work will get harder and she needs more focus to stay on task and learn what she needs to learn that her grades will probably suffer because she is spending so much time trying to deal with her body. It might happen in 3rd grade, it might be 6th grade it might not be until 10th grade, you don't know. They do say though that the sooner you deal with the issues the easier they are to correct. Get the Out of Sync child for them (if they won't be offended) and go from there.