FAFSA questions

[crisi]

The bookstore at my kid's college is all online. There is a small college store that sells a few school supplies and school merchandise. But your books come to the mailroom.

 

[mjkacmom]

The bookstores at all of my kids’ colleges are owner by Barnes and noble.

 

[MrsPete]

Boy that's a topic that could be debated for decades. We have the freedom to spend money where we want. And you don't have to watch too many of those financial shows like "Until Debt Do We Part" to learn that too many people have the income to save but made a decision not to,

Yep, we have the freedom to spend our money (and through credit, more) where we want -- but we don't have freedom from the consequences of our financial choices.

I guess it is a bit like what amount of mortgage someone can technically qualify for doesn't mean a person should actually commit to borrow that much.

A good analogy. For most of us, it'd be a real mistake to buy "as much house" as the bank says we can afford.

One good non work study place to work is the bookstore.

Housing is another good choice, and it's not at all connected to FAFSA, so a kid from a wealthy family has just as much chance as a financially needy kid.

When I was in college, I worked as an RA for three years, and it was absolutely the best thing (financially) I did for myself in college. I went to campus a week early /was trained in all kinds of emergencies. I had to do lots of work to prepare the rooms /paperwork for the rooms. I had to help distribute keys, help everyone get situated on the floor, and then had to do the reverse at the end of the year. Beginnings and ends aside, I was "on duty" one evening a week and every 5th weekend -- on those nights, I had to be in the building (and was not allowed to drink) from 6 pm to 6 am. On my duty nights I had to go to the top floor and "walk the halls" twice a night looking for any trouble (and checking every fire extinguisher). I had to host two socials and two educational events for the whole building each year, and I had a small budget to spend for this.

In exchange for this work (which I didn't find too hard most of the time), I received a free private dorm room, a phone in my room (this was pre-cells), 50% of my in-state tuition paid, and 50% of my meal plan paid. We also had loads of socials for the RAs: they took us white water rafting, they took us to play laser tag, they gave us a nice meal about once a month -- all sorts of fun things that I wouldn't have been able to afford on my own. I never received a penny of cash money, so I never paid taxes on it. 2-3 years ago I was in the lobby of my daughter's dorm, and I read an advertisement for the RA job. Her school doesn't give "the free stuff" that I received, but they pay a salary. I did a bit of math and figured out it's about the same amount I used to make.

I also had a job in college working at the dorm's front desk. I lived in "the main dorm", so they hired students to work in the evenings. Students who were locked out could come to us to borrow a copy of their room key. We gave change for the laundry machines, we lent out a vacuum cleaner and a few other items. We were in charge of packages too big to fit into mailboxes. It was a job that meshed well with being an RA because I'd be at the desk while everyone came/went to dinner, and I used the time to "catch up with" my residents.

A good friend of mine from college worked for the Athletics department as a referee. I don't think he got many hours, but it was a job he enjoyed.

My university hired people to work in the dorms over the summer. Their job was prepping dorm rooms (laying out sheets, towels, checking people in /out) for summer camps.

My daughter, who is now a nurse, worked in her college Health Center. Her title was CNA /housekeeper, but that bit of experience set her apart from other nursing students when it was time to get a job.

I didn't know anyone in college who worked in food service, but several of my younger daughter's friends worked in the cafeteria.

The bookstore at my kid's college is all online. There is a small college store that sells a few school supplies and school merchandise. But your books come to the mailroom.

Online makes sense. Why support an on campus store when a warehouse and website will do?

 

[tvguy]

Yep, we have the freedom to spend our money (and through credit, more) where we want -- but we don't have freedom from the consequences of our financial choices.

Sure we have the freedom from the consequences of our financial choices. Bankruptcy. You walk away.

 

[MrsPete]

Sure we have the freedom from the consequences of our financial choices. Bankruptcy. You walk away.

Eh, yeah, but that's not consequence-free.

 

[tvguy]

Eh, yeah, but that's not consequence-free.

Well, almost consequence free these days. As a kid in the early 1960's we had neighbors who went bankrupt and under the laws in place then even after bankruptcy, if any creditor found out you had a penny in a bank account, they could seize it for up to 7 years after the bankruptcy was approved. They got paid in cash, paid all bills in cash, and kept all their money in cash in the cookie jar. Now, once the bankruptcy is closed, you are off the hook.

 

[mistysue]

My daughter has been saying for years she didn't want college, then last week got all excited she decided to do college instead of a trade.
I dread dealing with FAFSA, I already know what it's going to say. I was completely broke when my high schooler was young, a few good years and we'll be expected to have saved around $5K a year. (including the years there was nowhere near enough to do so) We've saved in recent years but it hasn't had time to grow. It only stings because others have it the opposite way; they get to win both on the savings growing and the EFC being small.

 

[descovy]

I’m a middle class parent with 2 in college and 1 in 11th grade.

First, your home equity (on your primary residence) has nothing to do with your FAFSA. So keep doing what you want to do there.

No matter what your EFC is, assuming youre middle class, you will be offered a Stafford loan of $5500 freshman year up to $7500 Jr/Sr year. Then a parent plus loan for the remainder. Maybe you’ll be offered work study, but both my college kids have been better off with real part time jobs outside of the work study coffers. That’s pretty much it as far as FAFSA goes. If you’re low income, you may get up to $6000 in pell grants if your income is below $26k.

So the games of moving assets around is just silly, IMO.

The real game is merit aid. The trick is to apply for schools where your child’s stats are at the top. Apply to a prestigious “reach school” and expect to pay rack rate for the pleasure. And don’t discount small private schools.

Real numbers...
My oldest goes to a private college. Rack Rate is like $50k and we pay $6k after Stafford loan. (Tuition, Room Board)

My 2nd goes to a public university. Not the prestigious flagship university (Texas A &M). No, she goes to the smaller Texas A&M-Corpus Christi. She had great grades and SAT score so they offered merit aid covers nearly all her tuition. Costs way less than the flagship college because she is top of that class. At the flagship TAMU she’d be charged full price for being their “average” student and expect to be happy for the privilege of paying.


If it’s really about saving cash, don’t stress so much about moving assets around. Instead look for colleges where your kid can be the big fish in a small pond. Not the other way around.

 

[mjkacmom]

I’m a middle class parent with 2 in college and 1 in 11th grade.

First, your home equity (on your primary residence) has nothing to do with your FAFSA. So keep doing what you want to do there.

No matter what your EFC is, assuming youre middle class, you will be offered a Stafford loan of $5500 freshman year up to $7500 Jr/Sr year. Then a parent plus loan for the remainder. Maybe you’ll be offered work study, but both my college kids have been better off with real part time jobs outside of the work study coffers. That’s pretty much it as far as FAFSA goes. If you’re low income, you may get up to $6000 in pell grants if your income is below $26k.

So the games of moving assets around is just silly, IMO.

The real game is merit aid. The trick is to apply for schools where your child’s stats are at the top. Apply to a prestigious “reach school” and expect to pay rack rate for the pleasure. And don’t discount small private schools.

Real numbers...
My oldest goes to a private college. Rack Rate is like $50k and we pay $6k after Stafford loan. (Tuition, Room Board)

My 2nd goes to a public university. Not the prestigious flagship university (Texas A &M). No, she goes to the smaller Texas A&M-Corpus Christi. She had great grades and SAT score so they offered merit aid covers nearly all her tuition. Costs way less than the flagship college because she is top of that class. At the flagship TAMU she’d be charged full price for being their “average” student and expect to be happy for the privilege of paying.


If it’s really about saving cash, don’t stress so much about moving assets around. Instead look for colleges where your kid can be the big fish in a small pond. Not the other way around.

It also depends on where you want to go to school, my kids wanted to stay here on the east coast, where costs tend to be higher. Dd19 went the route of going to a less competitive school, and even after merit could only get the cost down to $30,000 at private and OOS public down from $50,000 - $65,000 a year (highest scholarships offered besides the full rides, you really need perfect test scores and top 2 in your class for those unless you go to much lower ranked schools in this area).

 

[tvguy]

I’m a middle class parent with 2 in college and 1 in 11th grade.

First, your home equity (on your primary residence) has nothing to do with your FAFSA. So keep doing what you want to do there.

No matter what your EFC is, assuming youre middle class, you will be offered a Stafford loan of $5500 freshman year up to $7500 Jr/Sr year. Then a parent plus loan for the remainder. Maybe you’ll be offered work study, but both my college kids have been better off with real part time jobs outside of the work study coffers. That’s pretty much it as far as FAFSA goes. If you’re low income, you may get up to $6000 in pell grants if your income is below $26k.

So the games of moving assets around is just silly, IMO.

The real game is merit aid. The trick is to apply for schools where your child’s stats are at the top. Apply to a prestigious “reach school” and expect to pay rack rate for the pleasure. And don’t discount small private schools.

Real numbers...
My oldest goes to a private college. Rack Rate is like $50k and we pay $6k after Stafford loan. (Tuition, Room Board)

My 2nd goes to a public university. Not the prestigious flagship university (Texas A &M). No, she goes to the smaller Texas A&M-Corpus Christi. She had great grades and SAT score so they offered merit aid covers nearly all her tuition. Costs way less than the flagship college because she is top of that class. At the flagship TAMU she’d be charged full price for being their “average” student and expect to be happy for the privilege of paying.


If it’s really about saving cash, don’t stress so much about moving assets around. Instead look for colleges where your kid can be the big fish in a small pond. Not the other way around.

Very well put.
The shocker to many parents is how much they are expected to pay out of their income.
The other shocker to many parents is that in the eyes of Universities, a loan is considered equal to a scholarship or grant in their eyes. It is a way to help a student pay the bills
In our case, we had a Grandparent who gave each of our kids $1,000 for each birthday and Christmas for their college fund. We were able to save $5,000 per year for the college fund. And we paid off our house 5 years before our oldest started college. So that $1,100 of monthy income that had been going to the house payment, went into the college fund for 5 years, then went to the college bill. With the oldest, who went to a private college, he got a $10,000 a year grand, and over his college time we had to borrow $50,000.
Our youngest is 4 years younger, and went to a state university. The $1,100 house payment money was more than enough to cover her expenses including room and board, so no loans needed there. The equity in our house was the backup financial resource, but we did not need to touch that

 

[LynnTH]

I have 2 kids in college right now. DS is a Senior (Business Major) and DD is a sophomore (Nursing Major) We also do not qualify for any grants except loans. Both kids have gone to Private Schools since Pre-K. They really wanted to continue on with the Private School in High School, which was a lot more money. We made it work with the tuition but also told them they would have to contribute some for college and encouraged an in-state college or one with reciprocity in hoping that we could get them out of college with no debt. So, kids had to pay $5000 a year and they both have worked summer jobs and also jobs during high school and saved up this money. We were lucky that my FIL also contributed $5000 a year towards college. We pay the rest.

Kids both both go to the same in-state college about 1-1/2 hours away. So far we have no student loans and don't see us having to take any. I really didn't want to have my kids come out of college with debt as I know how hard it can be starting out. Very happy we are able to make it work and the kids know how lucky they are that they will not have any debt coming out of college as many of their friends will. But had they chosen a private college or out of state college than that would be a different story.

 

[crisi]

If it’s really about saving cash, don’t stress so much about moving assets around. Instead look for colleges where your kid can be the big fish in a small pond. Not the other way around.

Or, alternatively, be prepared to pay to send your kid to a school that they (and you) want. It may be worth it to you to pay for a school that they really want, where they will be challenged, and which is a good fit....even if they can get a better deal at a school that isn't a good social or academic fit. That is going to take sacrifice and savings - probably starting when they are still in diapers - its usually too late by the time you are filling out the FAFSA. A college that they don't manage to complete Freshman year at because it is the wrong pond isn't going likely to save money.

Its a little like the vacations we take around here. Some of us will save to take a DCL cruise with a veranda and stay at the Yacht Club. And we will drive crappy cars and not eat out and never spend on a manicure in order to do it. Others will be happy to stay offsite and never cruise - that's what is in reach for the budgets we want to have for the remainder of the year. A few are fortunate enough to be able to take the cruise, stay at the Yacht Club - and still visit the manicurist every week and eat out frequently. You need to make the decisions for your budget and your life.

 

[dreamer17555]

So this is something I am passionate about so I apologize for the length.

1.) Fill out FAFSA honestly. Seriously. They audit more than you might think. Fill it out even if you don’t think you will get a dime of grant. It is how they offer your student their federal loan ($5,500 for freshman)

2.) Do not focus on the EFC. EFC is used two ways- One: Determining Pell Grants, Two: Determining Subsidized and Unsubsidized Portions of the Federal Student Loan. You can tell nothing else from this number.

3.) Because each school and state have their own formulas for determining additional aid. Those meet needs schools? They often use a second system called CSS that does factor in a lot more including home equity and non-custodial parents. Meet needs schools are often extremely selective and you should assume merit will not apply (as everyone has outstanding stats). So if applying to a school that needs CSS know that is a much more detailed process and that not every school that uses CSS is a Meets Needs schools but almost all Meets Needs schools use it.


4.) So how do I determine the cost? I would like to introduce you to your new best friend- Net Price Calculator. Each school will have its own. Some are much more detailed, some less. The more detailed ones generally provide a better idea of cost. Run them for each school your child is applying to.

5.) And because its 2020 and schools are hemorrhaging money mentally add on 15% if not more. Many NPCs are not calculating in this new reality and the costs and money losses schools are now facing. Aid next year and likely going forward is going to be bleak at many places. Federal is different but state and school grants? Please know that they might be disappearing.

6.) Merit is complicated. Schools that tend to offer huge merit 30K a year, oh boy! Tend to come with very high price tags (50-70k). This is what I call the Kohl’s effect and it is tuition discounting. Do not be swayed by large numbers, 5K off a 20K school is better than 30K off a 70K school. Real merit in the form of full tuition and the elusive full ride is exceptionally hard to achieve. They often must fill out extra essays, be interviewed, and have more letters of rec. It can happen. My daughter was blessed with one but it was work and she had outstanding stats and a very impressive essay.

7.) However, with it being 2020 do not count on these. In fact, pay close attention to if the scholarship is for all four years (and if so what it takes to keep it). Guaranteed is very different from potentially renewable in this world where schools are losing money hand over fist. Many schools like to offer a scholarship for freshman year to hook students who then must pay full freight after that.

8.) Be realistic about what you are willing to spend. Tell your student. Let them apply wherever but they need to know the line in the sand for cost once that aid offer comes.

9.) Know that things will change. This is especially true in the current climate. Majors that are safe bets today might be flooded with too many graduates in four years. Your child’s interests might change, a school could drop an entire program due to cuts. Do not get in over your head and be flexible enough to roll with the changes.

10.) Student loans aren’t evil but everyone needs to read the fine print. Your student’s brain is not wired at this age for long term thinking. It is your job to make sure they really understand what they are getting into and to also consider all the options (including not going to college, going to a more affordable school, or starting at community college). Maybe that big-name school with the great program is the right investment but all investments should be made after taking time to weigh the risks vs potential benefits.

 

[QueenIsabella]

Or, alternatively, be prepared to pay to send your kid to a school that they (and you) want. It may be worth it to you to pay for a school that they really want, where they will be challenged, and which is a good fit....even if they can get a better deal at a school that isn't a good social or academic fit. That is going to take sacrifice and savings - probably starting when they are still in diapers - its usually too late by the time you are filling out the FAFSA. A college that they don't manage to complete Freshman year at because it is the wrong pond isn't going likely to save money.

Its a little like the vacations we take around here. Some of us will save to take a DCL cruise with a veranda and stay at the Yacht Club. And we will drive crappy cars and not eat out and never spend on a manicure in order to do it. Others will be happy to stay offsite and never cruise - that's what is in reach for the budgets we want to have for the remainder of the year. A few are fortunate enough to be able to take the cruise, stay at the Yacht Club - and still visit the manicurist every week and eat out frequently. You need to make the decisions for your budget and your life.

I have to agree with this. DD17 wants to go to law school, and is looking at State U for undergrad, leaving her with college funds left over so that we can pay for most or all of law school.

OTOH, DD25 choose Pricey Private U. She wanted to be a bilingual teacher. She arranged her HS classes to best position herself a bilingual teacher. Pricey Private U was the only college that offered a semester abroad, that included teaching abroad. So, that's where she wanted to go. She got in, she went, she did a semester in Ecuador, teaching during her time there. Now, she's in grad school (2 classes a semester), which she is paying for. She might get some tuition reimbursement--I don't know. Not my problem. BTW, she teaches English to immigrants, her master's is in Linguistics, and the semester in Ecuador changed her focus--initially, she wanted to move abroad and teach English, but her time there helped her to see that she could be more of service by teaching kids in the US. All told, I can't say she made a bad choice.

P.S. To Crisi's second point--we all find the money (and time) for what's important to us. What that is, varies among people. Growing up, we were quite poor, but I always got the biggest stack on Scholastic Book Order Day. My parents had no money for college--literally, my FAFSA EFC was $0-250--but it was drilled into our heads that we WOULD be going.

 

[crisi]

6.) Merit is complicated. Schools that tend to offer huge merit 30K a year, oh boy! Tend to come with very high price tags (50-70k). This is what I call the Kohl’s effect and it is tuition discounting. Do not be swayed by large numbers, 5K off a 20K school is better than 30K off a 70K school. Real merit in the form of full tuition and the elusive full ride is exceptionally hard to achieve. They often must fill out extra essays, be interviewed, and have more letters of rec. It can happen. My daughter was blessed with one but it was work and she had outstanding stats and a very impressive essay.

Once all our acceptances were in, all the schools came within $10k. The expensive schools discounted more, the less expensive schools discounted less, and everything ended up right about the same (well, if you consider $10k about the same). The delta in tuition was actually even smaller, but room and board at expensive schools tended to be more expensive.

Although when you are looking at SPLACs on the East Coast, $50k IS the bargain school. For us, that was all we were looking at. Large public universities were not a good fit, and smaller state colleges were a worse fit. And the East Coast was the geographic region they wanted.

(And on that note, their first choice school was - by East Coast SPLACs prices - pretty much a bargain. But parents who have Freshman there this year are disappointed in the dorms - which are older (but redone) buildings by and large without the early 21st century dorm apartments that you will find near a lot of campuses. And the athletic center isn't much - it was probably built in the late 1950s. They've built a new Science Center - and a badly needed new Theatre Arts building will go in (after mine is done)....but they haven't spent money in the sorts of stuff that attracts students who are shopping - fancy modern dorms with private bathrooms and athletic facilities - and have been able to keep tuition down while continuing to attract students. Be aware what you are paying for - because paying for first class athletic facilities for your geeky kid who might take some yoga or swim a few times during their college years isn't a good use of your money.)

 

[mjkacmom]

Once all our acceptances were in, all the schools came within $10k. The expensive schools discounted more, the less expensive schools discounted less, and everything ended up right about the same (well, if you consider $10k about the same). The delta in tuition was actually even smaller, but room and board at expensive schools tended to be more expensive.

Although when you are looking at SPLACs on the East Coast, $50k IS the bargain school. For us, that was all we were looking at. Large public universities were not a good fit, and smaller state colleges were a worse fit. And the East Coast was the geographic region they wanted.

(And on that note, their first choice school was - by East Coast SPLACs prices - pretty much a bargain. But parents who have Freshman there this year are disappointed in the dorms - which are older (but redone) buildings by and large without the early 21st century dorm apartments that you will find near a lot of campuses. And the athletic center isn't much - it was probably built in the late 1950s. They've built a new Science Center - and a badly needed new Theatre Arts building will go in (after mine is done)....but they haven't spent money in the sorts of stuff that attracts students who are shopping - fancy modern dorms with private bathrooms and athletic facilities - and have been able to keep tuition down while continuing to attract students. Be aware what you are paying for - because paying for first class athletic facilities for your geeky kid who might take some yoga or swim a few times during their college years isn't a good use of your money.)

All of the east coast public universities my kids attended had old tired freshmen dorms, dd24 had ones with no a/c and hallway bathrooms freshman and sophomore years before moving off campus, ds19 had one freshman year but had one with a/c and private bathroom with one roommate sophomore year before moving off campus, Dd19 had a beautiful dorm with a/c but hallway bathrooms (new and super clean), wide carpeted hallways, but it was honors, there are still a few old dorms with no a/c for lower classme.

I think most colleges are replacing old dorms, but slowly. Upperclassmen who choose to live on campus seem to get the nice ones. I think it’s better for freshmen to live in traditional dorms, helps with meeting others.

 

[crisi]

All of the east coast public universities my kids attended had old tired freshmen dorms, dd24 had ones with no a/c and hallway bathrooms freshman and sophomore years before moving off campus, ds19 had one freshman year but had one with a/c and private bathroom with one roommate sophomore year before moving off campus, Dd19 had a beautiful dorm with a/c but hallway bathrooms (new and super clean), wide carpeted hallways, but it was honors, there are still a few old dorms with no a/c for lower classme.

I think most colleges are replacing old dorms, but slowly. Upperclassmen who choose to live on campus seem to get the nice ones. I think it’s better for freshmen to live in traditional dorms, helps with meeting others.

It seems to be a low priority for this college. But yes, Freshman year, no air, shared bathroom. Sophomore year a suite in a post WWII dorm - two doubles and two singles with a shared living space and a shared bathroom (two shower stalls, two toilet stalls) - still no air. Every time I've been there, everything has been clean - and the dorms have been refreshed with newer carpet (in the last five years) and replaced furniture (I think almost every year for the soft goods in the dorm lounges) Heat doesn't get turned on until October 1st. An apartment this year, but its in an old house, window air conditioners. My husband's SPLAC alma mater has put in huge apartment style dorms built over the last fifteen years - and mine - a large public university - has gone the "for profit" housing route - where the University works with for profit companies to provide student living space - a few of the traditional dorms still remain, but no new ones have been built since the 1960s.

Personally, I like the traditional Freshman dorm experience - small room, shared bathroom, meals out of the cafeteria - I think its a growth experience. But a lot of the parents seem to have had expectations of single rooms, private bathrooms, and air conditioning.

 

[QueenIsabella]

My older DD lucked out on freshman housing. By rights, she should have been in the regular freshman dorm. But her school owns a bunch of brownstones with themes--Spanish House, Chinese House, Business House, and so forth. The Education House had three slots where upper classmen wanted a double, but were put in a triple. So, DD got put into one of those slots. Obviously, it was an older, quirky building, but she also had 12-foot ceilings, a non-working fireplace in her room, a bow window, hardwood floors, and a walk-in closet (for all 3 girls to share).

The dorms that I've looked at for DD17's first-choice school look much newer, but they lack the charm that the brownstone had.

 

[tvguy]

All of the east coast public universities my kids attended had old tired freshmen dorms, dd24 had ones with no a/c and hallway bathrooms freshman and sophomore years before moving off campus, ds19 had one freshman year but had one with a/c and private bathroom with one roommate sophomore year before moving off campus, Dd19 had a beautiful dorm with a/c but hallway bathrooms (new and super clean), wide carpeted hallways, but it was honors, there are still a few old dorms with no a/c for lower classme.

I think most colleges are replacing old dorms, but slowly. Upperclassmen who choose to live on campus seem to get the nice ones. I think it’s better for freshmen to live in traditional dorms, helps with meeting others.

The dorm I lived in was built in 1923. My son lived in the same dorm 30 years later. Thanks to the San Francisco 49ers it now had ac and internet, but was otherwise the same. Bathroom down the hall shared by about 30 people.
My daughter went to CSU Monterey Bay, her dorm was the old officers housing because the campus used to be Fort Ord.. Huge 2 person rooms, with a bathroom only shared with the room next door.

 

[MrsPete]

My daughter has been saying for years she didn't want college, then last week got all excited she decided to do college instead of a trade.

She's been saying one thing for YEARS, then suddenly she's excited about something else? I'd want to know more about her thought process before I'd be too worried about FAFSA. Not saying she hasn't genuinely changed her mind, but this sudden 180 would make me want answers -- if it were my money she'd be spending.

Maybe you’ll be offered work study, but both my college kids have been better off with real part time jobs outside of the work study coffers.

Agree. Work study is going to pay minimum wage, while most college students can find other jobs in the area that'll pay more. However, perhaps just being argumentative, I loved my work study job: the hours were incredibly flexible, I didn't need to dress up, I didn't need transportation off campus, and I didn't work over breaks.
Of course, I was so poor in college that I always had at least one other job as well.

a sophomore (Nursing Major) We also do not qualify for any grants except loans.

My oldest is a nurse -- she's been out of school four years now. LOADS of scholarships are available for nursing -- not grants or need-based stuff, but academic scholarships.

On the other side of that coin, nursing school nickle-and-dimes you. It's an expensive major: $90 for very specific scrubs embroidered with the school name (totally ridiculous 'cause now that she's actually out in the world working scrubs are super-cheap and last forever), lab coat in addition to the scrubs, stethoscope and oximeter and several other gadgets you wouldn't expect to buy, parking pass for this hospital, $5 for ID card for the nursing home, background check, drug tests. So many little things here and there -- totally worth it, of course, but it was always something with nursing school.

Or, alternatively, be prepared to pay to send your kid to a school that they (and you) want. It may be worth it to you to pay for a school that they really want, where they will be challenged, and which is a good fit....even if they can get a better deal at a school that isn't a good social or academic fit.

Eh, I don't so much believe in the concept of college-as-sole-mate. Lots of excellent schools exist, and any college should challenge students. For most majors, you can get an excellent education at a variety of schools -- many of them with reasonable prices.

Its a little like the vacations we take around here. Some of us will save to take a DCL cruise with a veranda and stay at the Yacht Club. And we will drive crappy cars and not eat out and never spend on a manicure in order to do it. Others will be happy to stay offsite and never cruise - that's what is in reach for the budgets we want to have for the remainder of the year. A few are fortunate enough to be able to take the cruise, stay at the Yacht Club - and still visit the manicurist every week and eat out frequently. You need to make the decisions for your budget and your life.

Good analogy.

1.) Fill out FAFSA honestly. Seriously. They audit more than you might think.

Oh, my goodness, this is SO TRUE that I wouldn't have even thought to say it. Yes, ALWAYS be honest on these forms.

8.) Be realistic about what you are willing to spend. Tell your student. Let them apply wherever but they need to know the line in the sand for cost once that aid offer comes.

Yes, you are not a foul human being if you're not willing to fund an 18-year old's dream college experience.

All of the east coast public universities my kids attended had old tired freshmen dorms, dd24 had ones with no a/c and hallway bathrooms ...

This doesn't matter to me even one whit. I lived -- very happily -- in a rathole of a dorm, but when I think back to college I don't really remember going down the hall to use the rest room or the elevators that broke constantly. I remember the people. I remember going to the cafeteria together, sledding in the snow, going out to clubs, and just sitting around in the commons area. I would be very happy for my kids to have the same experience -- and I didn't save for years and years so they could have a fancy dorm. Clean and safe matter. "Upscale" doesn't.