1. In
MDE, go to friends and family, then next to her name, click on update. Make certain that the box next to My Disney PhotoPass Photos is filled in green. Log into her MDE and do the same for your name. Also, under My Disney Experience, under Photography, click on My Photos. There, under Want to share photos with others make sure to put a check mark next to Include photos shared by Family and Friends.
2. I believe there is, however at the moment, I don't have an active photopass / memory maker to verify with, but I believe if you view your photos, click on the photo you want to delete, and when it pops up, there should be the word delete and a trash can icon on the lower right corner that you can click on to remove it.