Episode III-Revenge of The Kings

[Mrs. The King]

That's right. The Kings are going back. I just made the reservations today. June 21-26.



Step back. Breathe it in King fans.

Oops. Don't breathe for a minute. (I had Thai food for lunch)

Sorry about that.


What kind of evil will we uncover? We are having a grand adventure!! My parents, his parents and us.


Who is involved?

My in laws. I actually love them endlessly. They are wonderful, fun loving people.

My parents. Crazy and ridiculously fun loving.

Mr. The King. Husband and sucker for marring me. (Don't tell him)

PC - Prince Charming (DS 10) who just recently received his Jedi training, so we will be rolling up into Star Tours like the freshly minted nerds we are.

PS- Princess Stitch (DD 7) is adorable and feisty.

and me. Mrs. the King. I have no sense. A huge, banging love for potty humor. Besides that I am real classy.


For those of you that have been down this road with me before. I commend you. You have a strong stomach. And you know I adore you. Hey Lurkers!!! I love you too. I will always respond to everyone and include you in our jokes and fun, fear not, jump right in!!


Buckle up friends. Mrs. The King is revving her engine, slapping her butt and lifting the protective glass from her baggallini.

 

[Mrs. The King]

I forgot to introduce The Jiggler.



Well, I guess it introduced itself with the Thai food war cry.

The Jiggler is my butt. And it has become quite a Diva since it was featured in my last two trippies.

It types. It has opinions.

I'm sorry about that.

 

[Normangirls]

Not only am I going to stop being a lurker, I'm going to be the first to say hello! The Jiggler is IN THE HOUSE!

 

[Mrs. The King]

Not only am I going to stop being a lurker, I'm going to be the first to say hello! The Jiggler is IN THE HOUSE!

Welcome First helloer!!! The Jiggler did a special happy dance the minute it saw your post

 

[Stacybaeasm]

Yay!!!Another fun and exciting report from the jiggler, PC and PS, and of course, Mrs The King!!!! I can't wait. I just have to remember not to read this thread at work because I laugh way too much and people wonder what I'm up to. Of course, they wonder what I'm up to most of the time, but when I laugh at my computer and spit Diet Coke at it, they worry.

 

[andrews1ma]

yipee! I am hanging in for the long haul! Now I know how my son felt when the 3rd edition of "Diary of a Whimpy Kid" was released! welcome back- cant wait to hear details! this will definitely help pass the time until my gang leaves for our Dis trip at the end of this month! I think I have 24 days to go!

 

[katiebelle21]

I am totally in! I just read your last TR and I loved it!

 

[Mrs. The King]

Yay!!!Another fun and exciting report from the jiggler, PC and PS, and of course, Mrs The King!!!! I can't wait. I just have to remember not to read this thread at work because I laugh way too much and people wonder what I'm up to. Of course, they wonder what I'm up to most of the time, but when I laugh at my computer and spit Diet Coke at it, they worry.

Yeah!! Thank you so much for jumping on board. I am thrilled I have tickled your funny bone (And I am glad you left Mr. The King out, he is such a wet rag)

yipee! I am hanging in for the long haul! Now I know how my son felt when the 3rd edition of "Diary of a Whimpy Kid" was released! welcome back- cant wait to hear details! this will definitely help pass the time until my gang leaves for our Dis trip at the end of this month! I think I have 24 days to go!

The Diary of the Wimpy Kid rocks!! It is ironic that you mentioned it because PC forced me to read the First one today! (I stinking loved it BTW.) I will be reading the second one tomorrow, as per his schedule.


So the planning has taken off like a wild fire. We are officially a Grand Gathering. Which entitles us to spend money in special places. Mr. The King feels we don't need to do the grand gathering anything. I am still trying to convince him.


We are going to do the dining plan, because that was so wonderful last time.

We are staying in AsMu. Or All Star Music. But we call it Asmu. and we stretch that "s" out a bit until it is borderline inappropriate.

I prefer Pop, but that sucker was full to the top and somehow a touch more expensive. I guess it upgraded itself to a value resort with a little extra.



Would you guys like a little insight into the evil I am planning this time around?

Well first, and most important, I will be designing a shirt for all those loving Grands to wear. I am tempted to put my screen name on those suckers. Or course, my mother would be Mother the King with a My father would have to have a halo for putting up with my mother

Mr. the King would stay the same.

But I need to name the in laws. My MIL is just a smidgeon under 5 foot, so I harass her relentlessly about her smaller stature. Which is unkind, but she gives as good as she gets, so we need a good name for her. I was thinking the eighth dwarf "shoppy". (actually PC came up with that one, too cute!)

My FIl is a deep thinker and a hunter. He has me stumped.

So I still need a theme and a color, then I will make the freaking shirts.

PS will need a few custom outfits. PC seems interested in collecting transportation cards, so I will have to work that in.


Our Dining Plans so far are,

O'Hana for dinner
Tusker House for dinner
Chef Mickey's for breakfast
Kona for Dinner
Raglan Road for dinner
Tokyo Dining for dinner


Any recommendations on what to order?

I also saw that France has Remy at the tables, but we didn't want to commit to a dinner there. I wonder if they would let PS just see the little rat?

I am very excited to see the American Idol ride ( I would love to get Mr. The King to try out, but don't tell him) and we are really looking foward to the Kim Possible adventures.

We are pushing PC this year to try the Star Tours ride and hopefully get him on Test Track as well.

Innoventions seemed to be in transition, though we played the Waste Management Game until we had noodle legs. So I can't wait until we get a peek if they moved along in there at all.

What an exciting trip to plan for. I feel very lucky that my in laws will get to see the kids in Disney while they are still at this magic window of believing in magic and (for PS) the fuzzy characters.


I will throw a cute PS and PC story up here soon and post pictures of whatever I come up with as we go.

Please give me your opinion on everything I am so glad I have a trip to plan and such a great group of online friends to share it with. (Hey Lurkers! Jump on board I love to hear from new people!)

 

[Mrs. The King]

So, funny PC and PS story (my kids)

On the last day of school, we were riding in the van with the radio on. "Hot Blooded" comes on (what station was I listening to anyway ) and my girl says out loud "I have heard of warm blooded, why does he keep singing hot blooded?"

so my boy says "Well, warm blooded means that you have an internal heating mechanism, and his must be malfunctioning." I was panicking trying to decide how to explain passionate feelings to a seven year old! I am so glad I kept my trap shut.

 

[scottny]

I am along for the ride from the beginning.

 

[mrsksomeday]

Scott PM'd me that you had a PTR!!! YAY!!! The Jiggler is back!!

I can't wait to read about your planning and adventures. I wonder if your mom will accidently report you again. I love your name for your MIL, fantastic as long as she doesn't have a problem with it no one else should, it is great.

I loved the "hot blooded" story, I would have been racking my brain trying to think of what to say, thank goodness PC had an answer.

 

[Mrs. The King]

I am along for the ride from the beginning.

Welcome back!!!

Scott PM'd me that you had a PTR!!! YAY!!! The Jiggler is back!!

I can't wait to read about your planning and adventures. I wonder if your mom will accidently report you again. I love your name for your MIL, fantastic as long as she doesn't have a problem with it no one else should, it is great.

I loved the "hot blooded" story, I would have been racking my brain trying to think of what to say, thank goodness PC had an answer.

I forgot to ask her if she would have a problem with it I should do that!! Thanks for coming on!

 

[Mrs. The King]

Ok. The husband has really got me wondering. He was so thrilled when some camera equipment arrived in the mail. He had been all-atwitter about its arrival.
Now, I trust Mr. The King to make his own manly purchases. The tax money rolled in and this was the treat he decided on.
I watched as he happily pulled it out of the box.
He bought a stick. An expandable stick. As I eyed him with suspicion, he clamped his beloved camera to the stick.

And that’s it.

That’s all it does.

Me~ “We bought a stick?”

Him~”It’s a monopod. For my camera.”

Me~""

Him~ “It has a wrist strap!”

Me~” A stick with a string? Does it have, like other legs to hold it up, or something?”

Him (scoffing)~”That would be a tripod. This is a monopod.”

Now I am blond, but I do know that mono means one. Hello, Monorail?! It only has one something or other that makes it different from the Trirails.
I watched as he delightedly stood with his camera on a stick and snapped pictures of the living room. I thought of Jeff Dunham and his Jalapeño on a stick.

Then me husband completely ignored me, and packed his camera in his obscenely heavy backpack that travels like Yoda on his back in Disney world.

And he clipped the collapsed stick on a string to the arm strap of Yoda.
Then he had the audacity to look at me. Again.

He is lucky he is handsome with white teeth and a set of dimples. I shook my head at the version of my man I would be looking at in Disney. At least he is usually smiling.

So we are proud owners of a stick, which I fully intend on stealing to beat people with. I will become the Disney Whisperer with that stick. Ever see Cesar Milan? With all his “Chuchch” and “See my hand? Dat is a bite!” (I love that man relentlessly, by the way.)

I will take said stick and poke people.

Me~ ”See that stick? It is a poke!” I will use it to correct such unwanted behaviors as farting, nose picking, line jumping and body odor (in that order).

So you are welcome fellow Dissers, if by some miracle, Mr. the King gets through security with his overpriced expandable stick, I will be prodding the crap out of “the undesirables of Disney.”

But in all honestly, I expect him to get a full body cavity search in the tunnels under the Magic Kingdom.

I have a problem. Well, actually it is an old problem that has recently resurfaced.

Before I had children, I cursed. A lot. I cursed creatively like only a girl who attended 12 years of Catholic School can curse. (All that plaid brings out the worst in a person.)

But I reformed. The sight of my beloved little angel’s faces turned me into the Mother Teresa of dialogue. I would even correct my parents with a disapproving headshake if words any stronger then the words appearing on Noggin were uttered.

Well, two things have broken me. And in my head, I am cursing a bunch. I am mentally on the wild side all the time now. I read an online story (Wide Awake, a Twilight fiction by Angstgoddess003) that is absolutely filthy. The curse words are horrific. And I loved it. Don’t judge me, lots of ladies my age have read this story. We just keep quiet about it.

And second, which I entirely blame Mr. The King for, I watched Role Models. This movie heinous, obnoxious, and not appropriate in any way, shape, or form. And I loved it. I am sure I am going to “he double hockey sticks” for it, too.

Maybe this is some sort of mid life crisis. It is a resurgence of an old, evil habit. Here is my great fear, I am afraid I will curse in front of Mickey. In my reoccurring nightmare, I let loose with a string of words that would make a sailor blush.

Or worse yet, my mother Oh yes! Don’t let my dear mother kid you. She has a phenomenal mouth on her. Truly, it’s shocking. I am sure she will deny it here, and I promise you would never expect from her. She is usually wearing a sweater with some sort of season thematic appliqué on it. A jovial Santa or a desperately adorable bunny. Her pretty face is quick to smile and her beautiful blue eyes always seem to be sparkling.

But Lord help you if you step out of line. She will go up one side of you and down the other with the ferociously of a pit bull raised in the Bronx who was only fed evil for dinner.

Well enough about Mom.

What have we covered here folks? I am cursing, my husband has a stick and my mother could work for the mob when she is not sewing.

Cheerio!!

Love Always,

your tour guide,

Mrs. The King.

 

[mrsksomeday]

I watched as he delightedly stood with his camera on a stick and snapped pictures of the living room. I thought of Jeff Dunham and his Jalapeño on a stick.

Great visual, I bet he really did look like that .

So we are proud owners of a stick, which I fully intend on stealing to beat people with. I will become the Disney Whisperer with that stick. Ever see Cesar Milan? With all his “Chuchch” and “See my hand? Dat is a bite!” (I love that man relentlessly, by the way.)

I will take said stick and poke people.

Me~ ”See that stick? It is a poke!” I will use it to correct such unwanted behaviors as farting, nose picking, line jumping and body odor (in that order).

Here is where I had to have Bill mute the tv so I could start reading this installment to him, I was laughing so hard he thought I had lost it . Ace (the dog) and I love Cesar too!

So you are welcome fellow Dissers, if by some miracle, Mr. the King gets through security with his overpriced expandable stick, I will be prodding the crap out of “the undesirables of Disney.”

I thank you in advance for taking care of these people, someone needs to.

But in all honestly, I expect him to get a full body cavity search in the tunnels under the Magic Kingdom.

I can see that happening and you laughing hysterically as they take him away.

Here is my great fear, I am afraid I will curse in front of Mickey. In my reoccurring nightmare, I let loose with a string of words that would make a sailor blush.

I can have a mouth on me as well, I understand your fear, we are meeting people from Enchanted in October and I am so afraid the curse words will flow the first time someone cuts in front of Bill's wheelchair.

But Lord help you if you step out of line. She will go up one side of you and down the other with the ferociously of a pit bull raised in the Bronx who was only fed evil for dinner.

Goodness don't ever get on her bad side .

When I reply to PTR/TR's I usually don't quote this much but you have so many funny things to comment on. Are you working on that book?

Thank you again for another great installment, I really look forward to your posts, you always make me smile.

 

[All7OfUs]

Hi Mrs. The King!

I have been searching everyday for a new "offering" from you! Thank Heavens there is more fodder now for my perusal!

So glad Mr. The King has a strap for his stick! Gosh darn, that'd be just too weird without one!

Even more glad you'll be using it to correct unruly and rude behavior while you are there! We need more people willing to do that for us. Maybe you should enlist your Mom to help you, should things get beyond "your reach".

 

[coffeehousemom]

YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MrstheKing is back!!! I just bookmarked your twillight blog so I can get even more of a fix.

 

[oregonmommyof2]

I read your other trip reports one weekend while my hubby was working overtime and I loved them!!! I am so excited about this pre trippie... I promised myself I would not lurk on ya if you did another...

My DH likes camera thingamabobs also, but I have yet to hear about a monopod.... hmmm, may have to google that one...

 

[scottny]

I have a gorillapod. I get through security so he should get through with his stick with a string.

 

[Mrs. The King]

Great visual, I bet he really did look like that .




Here is where I had to have Bill mute the tv so I could start reading this installment to him, I was laughing so hard he thought I had lost it . Ace (the dog) and I love Cesar too!



I thank you in advance for taking care of these people, someone needs to.



I can see that happening and you laughing hysterically as they take him away.



I can have a mouth on me as well, I understand your fear, we are meeting people from Enchanted in October and I am so afraid the curse words will flow the first time someone cuts in front of Bill's wheelchair.



Goodness don't ever get on her bad side .

When I reply to PTR/TR's I usually don't quote this much but you have so many funny things to comment on. Are you working on that book?


Thank you again for another great installment, I really look forward to your posts, you always make me smile.

I am glad Bill is willing to listen! Maybe we could rig the stick with a taser and mount it for the wheelchair? Then Bill can deliver a digital denial right to the rump of the offender. I will be all business with that ridiculous stick. I would laugh and whip out the video camera! You have a mouth on you!! I would not have guessed. We should get together and curse like truckers i am so glad you are all up in this report!!

I am working on writing as much as possibleI am finding it fun and blame all of you for encouraging me!

Hi Mrs. The King!

I have been searching everyday for a new "offering" from you! Thank Heavens there is more fodder now for my perusal!

So glad Mr. The King has a strap for his stick! Gosh darn, that'd be just too weird without one!

Even more glad you'll be using it to correct unruly and rude behavior while you are there! We need more people willing to do that for us. Maybe you should enlist your Mom to help you, should things get beyond "your reach".

Hey Sweet stuff!!!

I am glad my offering pleases you. I can't say the same for my toilet. (Which, BTW, I have re named the turlet)

If I handed my mom the stick, I can't imagine how quickly we would end up on the news.

YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MrstheKing is back!!! I just bookmarked your twillight blog so I can get even more of a fix.

Yeah!! Coffeehouse! I am so glad you found it You will have to let me know if you like the Twilight ficion, I totally changed the story

I read your other trip reports one weekend while my hubby was working overtime and I loved them!!! I am so excited about this pre trippie... I promised myself I would not lurk on ya if you did another...

My DH likes camera thingamabobs also, but I have yet to hear about a monopod.... hmmm, may have to google that one...

I am sorry your hubby likes the camera stuff Maybe we can form a support group or something? I am so glad you pulled out of the lurkdom It makes the jiggler tremble with joy.

I have a gorillapod. I get through security so he should get through with his stick with a string.

Oh, he was the gorillapod as well. How many things does a man need to hold his camera?? I mean, he has hands. I think all you camera junkies have a deal with the security people.

 

[Mrs. The King]

It came with instructions. You read right. I was cleaning the kitchen and came upon a set of instructions in a little plastic baggie.

Instructions heralding the virtues, powers, and maintenance of the Stick. (this will be the smilie to represent the stick)

Really. I felt like we should all share in this experience. So here:
http://www.outdooreyes.com/photo5.php3

enjoy some stick instructions.

“Practice using the monopod with option 4 until you feel extremely natural and comfortable. 
 
Practice your breathing techniques and as well as your shutter control with your monopod to produce the sharpest photographs possible.”

I called to my husband.
Me~ ”Honey, do you need these instructions?”
Him~ *Squints eyes to see what ridiculous, beloved electronic the instructions I am holding are for*

Now, normally, He would grab the instructions like Gollum grabs the ring, and squirrel them away (still unopened from he plastic bag, mind you) where I will inevitably find them in another fit of cleaning, and we will start the whole process. Again.

But even he laughed and threw them out.

Why are the instructions preserved like dried fruit anyway? Are we assembling electronics in ponds or something? I bet a man came up with that idea. They love their instructions. Which is ironic, being that they NEVER USE THEM. I have never, in almost 12 years of marriage seen this man dig into his little unholy pile of preserved for freshness instructions to solve any problem.

If we need a part or a piece for anything that is plugged in, he lifts the problem item and twirls it all around until he finds the super secret item-product-upc-edition number. That number is always located in a twisting , awful, jacked up spot under a rusty, deadly flap of metal. Even on a coffee pot.

Then you google the crap out of that number. And your computer gets transported to some site that was designed in 1972 with font the size of pinheads with no diagrams at all.

Ladies, I think the location of these numbers was also thought up by a man. You want to know what a lady would do? We would name it. That’s right. Name it like we name our children. Did you ever notice babies don’t have the plastic encased instructions? That’s because it is us, ladies, that bring them into the world, and we know that no one ever uses the instructions anyway.

If it was up to men, the babies would have their super secret code for the child tattooed on the inside of the eyelid or something. And you would probably have to pop out an eyeball to see it.
Names are easier.

I am naming my toaster right now. I dub it “William Peter Heatypants.” Now, if it came from the factory with that name, I would remember it.

Whatever. Enough about men and a stick.

I bought PS a package of new socks yesterday in Wal-Mart. She is not a sock fan, so I have to find creative socks that entice her little feet. Well, I guess I went overboard when I found the days of the week socks with cute little pictures.

You know how we buy the kids toys right? We are self-sacrificing, going without our special little something so our angels can have gobs of toys?

Well, my kids spent about 2 hours playing with one of those socks. You know what’s great? I didn’t even notice for the first hour and 45 minutes. They were happy and not fighting, so I kept doing what I was doing.
Fianaly, I noticed. PS had the sock on her hand and it was ordering PC to complete tasks.

I said to my son, “Are you talking to a sock?”

“No”, he scoffs. “It is talking to me.”

Of course. Silly me. I should have figured that out.

We received our Trip Planning DVD from Disney yesterday, which any true Disser knows, is really just a decoration. Just a way to get excited about the mail. Because it does not tell you a stinking thing you don’t already know.
In our house, it is a way for the children to tell us exactly which rides they absolutely will not go on. Which is about as much fun as it sounds.
Mr. The King and I try to detail the whole ride, but they have the big saucer eyes.

Then Mr. the King tries to get extremely reasonable, “Kids, Disney is not trying to kill you. They design these rides for fun. If people died at the end of a ride, the company would not make any money. People have to be alive to spend money.”
Practical, right?

Well, the kids only heard “ Disney…kill you…dead people.”
At least we have two sets of grand-parents that will find the stubborn children endearing and adorable. Mr. the King and I will dump them and strap ourselves into Expedition Everest.

70 days to go!!!