Engagement Ring Alternatives?

[SanFranciscan]

I am helping a friend of mine plan a wedding and am encouraging her and her fiance to consider a Walt Disney World honeymoon because my husband and I enjoyed our trip to Orlando in October. Like me she is not a jewelry person and has decided to skip the engagement ring. I no longer even have the ring my husband bought for me at the insistence of his ex-girlfriend when she found out that he was engaged to me.

My friend's fiance hopes that Mimi means it when she says that she doesn't want an engagement ring and would like to buy her an alternative gift to formalize their engagement. What suggestions do you have? Mimi is not a very traditional woman, but she's still pretty feminine in a lot of ways.

 

[Lynn5700]

Does she not want a ring at all,or just not a diamond,or just doesn't want a piece of jewelery?

 

[hmgolden]

My first thought was a non-diamond piece of jewelery. Or perhaps diamond stud earrings.

If she doesn't want jewelery of any form, he could buy her formal china or something else substantial that a bride would traditionally register for and a couple would have throughout their marriage.

 

[deekaypee]

A friend of mine, a writer, is the same way. Her DH bought her this gorgeous handcrafted mahogany writing desk with maple inlays for her engagement gift. It's a definite heirloom piece and one that she uses every day, so it reminds her of their commitment.

 

[sajilunni]

I was the same way! I didn't wear my wedding ring for the first 5 years of our marriage, but then I realized that it really is significant to my husband, so I started wearing it 24/7 4 years ago. I'm not a jewelry fan at all and told my then fiancee that I would rather have a down payment on a house than an engagement ring. His mom totally insisted, and he felt a lot of pressure about getting a good ring from his friends. I still said no. Then he said that he would design the ring completely by himself and it would be like wearing a piece of his artwork. That convinced me to allow him to do it. It was very unique: platinum with a gold design on the sides and three oval diamonds with a spaces in between them. I did wear it for a while during our engagement, but stopped wearing it completely since we got married (except at weddings).

We have some traditions in Indian culture that might be an alternative. First of all we have a pendant that is put on a string which is then tied into a knot which the bride wears forever (I took mine off ). The other is engraving each others names on the OUTSIDE of the wedding ring. That I did. When people see our matching rings and each others names on them it inevitably evokes an "AWWW!" reaction. I do like looking down and seeing his name and thinking about him, and he says he does the same.

Jil

 

[SanFranciscan]

I did like my friend's fiance's idea for an alternative to the engagement ring that she says that she does not want. He said that instead of the diamond ring perhaps they should each have the gold band sort of rings with a new twist. He is thinking that his will be white gold and hers yellow gold (or the other way around) and then melt them down and make two new rings out of a combination of the old rings to use at their wedding.