Dropping kids at birthday parties

[mickeywho?]

If you need someone to stay with the child at the party you need to specify on the invite. Otherwise, the invitation is to the child, not their mom, dad, grandma, older sibling, next door neighbour...seriously!
I've had big parties for my boys when they were younger - and at the gym parties with 20 plus kids, I made sure I had enough adults there to help supervise. That did not include parents. I asked my sister, sister-in-law and my usual babysitter to help with the numbers so ratio was appropriate.
Most parents would ask when they dropped off if they were needed and it was easy to reasure them that there was already more than enough supervision and they could enjoy a couple of hours child-free. I have only had one parent insist she stay and that was because the child has severe food allergies and she was nervous about leaving her. I didn't have any problem and this parent basically sat back and stayed out of the way. She did not expect to be entertained or fed and was very respectful about letting us run the party without her. Of course, if she wanted to participate more we would have loved it...but the point is, she wasn't needed.
In our area, parents drop off from around the age of 5. No worries.
So glad I'm done with the big parties.

 

[mdsoccermom]

Around here, people stop staying for parties around 1st grade or so. If a parent needs extra supervision at a party she is throwing, it's up to her to arrange it. It should never be assumed that the parents of the guests would help out. I would be very annoyed if someone expected me to watch the kids at their party; after all, it wasn't my choice to have a party and invite 20kids.

 

[kirstenb1]

5,6 years old I always stayed unless it was at someone's house(I don't think that ever happened). Now they are 9 and 11 and I drop and run and have for a few years now. I think the last Chuck E Cheese party was when my son was 7 and I hung around with a bunch of other parents I'm friendly with.
If I'm good friends with the mom of the birthday child, I'll stick around and help.
No matter how old the kids are, for my kids parties I plan accordingly and have enough chaperones on my own without expecting the parents to stay. If they want to that's fine, but I don't count on it or expect it. I prefer that they go, to be honest, I feel like i have to entertain the parents if they stay. LOL

Wow, you've summed up my exact feelings!

 

[luvmy3]

I got caught off guard a couple of times when parents STAYED at my kids birthday parties, even the ones at our house. I was prepared to watch, feed, entertain 8 kids.....but I wasn't prepared to watch, feed and entertain 4 parents too.

I'm just the opposite, I don't mind when parents stick around, I like the chance to get to know them a little bit if I don't already. I gladly offer some pizza or cake or drinks because 99% of the time the kids don't want to eat it anyway and 3/4 of it would be thrown out.

If I bring my kids to a party, it depends on the age whether I stay or not (or if its a friend and needs help). I do not need to be entertained by the parent host, half the time the parents that stay just hang out away from the party, but we are there in case we are needed for anything. I don't expect to be fed, or participate or distract the parent, unless I'm needed you wouldn't even know I was there. Thats just how parent's are around here, although there are a few individual exception.

 

[MrsJackSparrow4Life]

Unless the parents are friends with each other and want to catch up all birthday parties around here are drop-and-run. It has been that way since my daughter's 5th birthday.

 

[NMAmy]

DD is grown up now but when she was little, all the parents dropped the kids off at the parties from about the time they started going to them (5 years oldish)--whether at home or the skating rink or Chuck E. Cheese. I find it odd that someone would invite 20 kids without adequate supervision provided.

 

[golfgal]

When our kids were little NO ONE stayed unless it was a family style party-back yard BBQ or something. Most people would have thought you were weird if you stayed at a kids' party. If you were having a large party you would enlist another parent to stay and help if needed but other than that, the parents dropped kids off and you usually brought them home after the party.

 

[jrmasm]

I was a drop-n-run parent. I would never think about sticking around at a birthday party.

Me too.

 

[MrsPete]

Whether to drop or stay depends upon the child's age.

Regardless, the party host should have ample adult supervision on hand. IF that supervision includes the expectation that parents'll stay, that should be mentioned on the invitation.

 

[roliepolieoliefan]

Just got home from having DD's 7th birthday at a rec center indoor pool complex. About half the parents stayed. Most of the parents and kids I know well. They are all from our subdivision except a couple , with only 1 parent I never met.

Didn't bother me. I ordered extra pizza and had extra cupcakes, so no big deal . Some helped me pass out the pizza and cupcakes, .

 

[pandora174]

Down here in my experience with DS 7 through 4 years of b-day parties there are almost no drop offs. Unless one mom is picking up another mom's kids. Those mom's that have dropped off have advised the mom usually when they get to the party & the mom was "not" happy. Alot of shaking heads over "lack of parental responsibility".

Parties whether at Chuckee Cheese, public locations or just backyard pool always have food for the kids & for the adults, many time beer for the adults as well. A game usually on the family room on for the guys. It's alot of expense & work ! Which is why I've moved toward "family only" parties or "disney/seaworld" location vacation for DH, DS & myself (less stress). It costs a fortune when you include the parents & the additional expense as well, which I rather spend on a vacation to celebrate DS b-day. Thankfully as he's gotten older while he loves going to other kids parties he prefers a big gift & a mini getaway that a party. I did the math & a nice gift & mini vacation using Priceline, our annual passes & coupons & comes up cheaper than a party ! This year DS is getting a Wii & either his choice of family party or 3 days in Orlando. He chose Orlando Next year he says he wants a family party

 

[AustinTink]

wow- never would I stay at a party with my daughter at 10 years old...she is 10 years old now and in 6th grade and I think that is WAY to old to be staying at a party she was invited to- in fact I think that if I stayed at parties with her at that age she wouldn't go LOL.
In kindergarten everyone stayed--in first grade it was hit or miss- if it wasa closed venue place they dropped and left...if it was skating or Upchuck Cheese they sometimes would stay. I hated when the parents stayed because the party host is then forced to order food for the parents too which way increased the cost of the party.

To each his own I guess. DS's school is small and we're a very close-knit community of friends. We always rent out the whole roller rink, so we don't have to deal with out patrons. So, the majority of the parents not only stay, but skate as well. It's a lot of fun, actually.

 

[DisneyKT]

I'm just the opposite, I don't mind when parents stick around, I like the chance to get to know them a little bit if I don't already. I gladly offer some pizza or cake or drinks because 99% of the time the kids don't want to eat it anyway and 3/4 of it would be thrown out.

This is how I am, I like to socialize with the parents. The kids don't want to hang out with the adults.
I usually send cake home with the kids. We always have extra.

Also won't leave my kid at a Chuck E Cheese type place until older. The one next to us is a armpit. I can't stand those places.

 

[bumbershoot]

Obviously it's necessary to state your expectations on the invitation, no matter which way you want it to go.

We took DS to a birthday party where they invited the parents, and it was a great time! The husband entertained the other adults while the mom entertained the kids....and then later all the husband that were there (a most pleasant surprise!) helped to entertain the kids as well. Great fun!

Next b'day party he went to invited the parents as well, and it was to a baseball game. That was awesome! The parents even had special tickets for the adults that included free peanuts, pretzels, and beer.

 

[Green Tea]

I agree with the OP. I would neither expect nor want the parents to stay. I would invite no more than I could handle on my own.

 

[DisneyScraps]

I always plan to supervise the childen if the parents want to leave but I am also prepared with food and drinks for the parents that choose to stay. Most drop the kids off but there is always one or two that want to stay.

Lisa

 

[jodifla]

In my area, parents definitely stayed in K and 1st grade. In 2nd, about half dropped off. We just went to a third-grade party, and about a third of the folks stayed at least part of the time.

Of course, most of the parents know each other now and like to catch up a bit.