Do you vacation without your spouse or SO?

[browneyes]

I wish! My SO and I have VERY different ideas about what's fun. He'd be happy looking at trees or nature stuff. I want to ride thrill rides and get sick on cotton candy. He's planning a vacation without me within the next year or so. I hope he has fun and enjoys those trees.

 

[caitycaity]

sure, why not? i don't think that makes our marriage any better or worse than anyone elses. we still love each other eventhough we have some time apart.

i often go to visit my family when dh can't get time off from work (for example, i'm going at the end of the month for 4 days to visit my grandma in michigan who has terminal cancer). dh can't go, but why should that stop me from spending time with people i love?

this past december i also went and met some friends at wdw. they're my friends, not his, and i know i had a better time without him there where he wouldn't have known anyone and we would have constantly been talking about things that he wouldn't get. he had a good time having some time off too. he got to hang out with some of his friends that i don't really like.

dh and i both sometimes travel for work as well, so obviously the other one doesn't go along all the time for that either.

it works for us. i think it is healthy to have some time apart sometimes as well as individual interests and a few seperate friends.

of course, we also do take some vacations together.

 

[snoopy]

We do vacation without one another. Before I found the DIS it was customary that I got together with my college roomates and made a weekend out of it somewhere, and he has always enjoyed golf weekends with my brother and his other male friends. Nowdays my solo trips seem to center more around the DIS.

DH can take WDW/Orlando about once every other year, I prefer to go more often, and he has no problem with me going. I figure he's a big boy, he'll make out fine while I'm gone as I will when he is away.

 

[Dee & Greg]

I show horses, so during the summer I travel to horse shows with other riders from my barn. These are usually long weekends. Hubby is allergic and would rather stay home with the dogs and play golf. We don't have kids, so this works for us. But we would never take a long, true vacation without each other. Including our annual trek to WDW in November!

 

[Rajah]

I've had both full and partial vacations without DH.

Once was because I was going to a conference at the Disneyland Hotel and DH could only join me for the weekend before the conference. I had 5 days by myself after that, and ended up meeting someone who has become one of our best friends.

Once was because *DH* had a conference. That was Orlando, and we went to WDW before the conference, but the day it started I was solo for Universal and IOA before I came home. Does one day solo count?

Once was because I really needed a vacation and really wanted to return to New Mexico to visit my grandparents, and DH still wasn't ready to return to NM/Colorado after his horrific first experience there. So my dad and I went instead and had a wonderful vacation with my grandparents/his parents.

Then most recently, what was originally intended to be a together long-weekend before another of his conferences turned into a 9-day trip, 7 days of which were with my mom and grandparents before DH could join us. The days before DH joined us were spent doing research for my graduate project. So it was a working vacation, but it was definitely a vacation.

As for DH, most recently he vacationed on Oahu alongside his conference there last month. I couldn't get the time off of work to go.

 

[Betsyt82]

I go away for weekends with out DH and he without me at times. We like to do them both vacation together and some seperate. I makes us both very happy and helps to keep a healthy marriage.

 

[grinningghost]

Nope. Sappy as it may sound, we are so close and have such a ball together, we can't imagine going somewhere fun without each other.

 

[Michelle]

Yes. We both have taken our daughter on separate vacations. He loves to camp, I hate it, so he takes her camping. I love WDW, he tolerates it, so I take her to WDW. Makes everyone happy.

I also have taken a weekend away with girlfriends from time to time or have been away on trips with friends or for business...as he has.

We definitely do at least one big family vacation each year as well.

 

[4greatboys]

We have done both. Dh doesnt like to travel as much as I do but he does enjoy our 1 big yearly vacation and we may do a weekend or 2 up to see my bil/sil. I did go to Dis con last year by myself. It wasnt that hard leaving dh because he didnt really want to go any and he had work. But it was hard to leave the 2 little ones.
I'm now watching airfares so I can try to make another Dec trip to WDW w/out dh. He wont want to go and if fine with me going. However this time the 2 little ones are coming along too

tmli--if my dh didnt like to travel or had a fear of it I wouldnt hesitate to go without him. I love to travel and it would be such a shame for someone to just have to sit at home because their spouse/SO didnt want to or didnt like to travel.

 

[Jenzebelle]

Yes DH and I vacation apart.
I have interests that I do not share with my husband, and vice versa. Why should I spend lots of money on a vacation that he is not interested in and would not enjoy? Why should I spend money on something he's going to be completely miserable doing and will make me enjoy my vacation less because I know he's not enjoying himself? Why not instead go and enjoy myself alone or with a friend or family for a few days and come back relaxed, refreshed, and in good spirits - thus being a happier person upon my return?

It doesn't mean we don't love each other. It doesn't mean we don't enjoy spending time with each other
I personally don't think it's healthy to spend every waking minute with a person because I think alone time is good for the soul and helps you get in touch with yourself. Absence really can make the heart grow fonder.
You have to do what works for your relationship.

 

[WDWLVR]

Originally posted by tmli
In reading these posts I some times feel judgements are being made because our decisions would not necessarily be the same as yours. I hope my post and others shows there are many different opinions--none right or wrong - just different!

I've enjoyed reading all the different answers. It certainly wasn't my intention to pass judgement in any way. I was just curious who did and who didn't and why. I think each couple needs to do what's right for them. For some it is different vacations for others (like myself) its not having them.

Can't wait to hear from others as well.

 

[Fire14]

I take a lot of weekend trips SOLO to see my parents, my dog, and my Nieces and nephew. I also do go solo to some DIS meets. For us it's a case of ability to get time off work. I as a nurse can work 3 12 hour days and get paid fulltime wages.We also have seperate interests such as I enjoy just gathering with friends, he enjoys casinos and playing differnt slot machines. Another thing is his friends and him have had NASCAR tickets for about 5 years now for June MI race and to get me a seat near them would be a challenge, I choose to let him and friends go to race, I vist my parents or stay home.

 

[Beast fan]

Just getting ready to start my 2nd vacation (in 3 yrs) w/o DW or DS's 5 and 2.5.

I like mountain bike riding and am going on a "bike tour" that begins 7/13. DW doesn't like biking (at least not on the different terrains this trip will take me) and will stay home with the DS's.

Do I feel guilty about leaving DW and the DS's at home? The DS's ...... yes, because they are my pride and joy. I love them with all my heart and would love for them to ride, but they are not allowed on this ride until roughly age 13 (the physical endurance needed to finish this 6-day trip is too much for some adults!). DW..... no. If she wanted to go on this trip badly enough, we would have had our DS's watched by one of our sets of grandparents (they volunteered).

Dave

 

[MOMTOMOOTOO]

What an interesting thread! We have done seperate vacations in the past for 4-5 days. But we always try for 2 family vacations per yearas well. In 2 weeks I'm taking just my girls to WDW and DH is "bonding" with the baby. (well at least after work) we will have a sitter during the day.

My DH travels alot for business and he gets plenty of alone time He will be going to New Orleans for a week in Sept.

But the big news here is DH is sending me on a cruise with my girlfriends in January I will be gone 9 days!! I am so thrilled. He is taking the time off from work and being a real Mr Mom. Now I'm sure I'll miss the kiddies but I really need a break!

Laura

P.S. We do have a wonderful marriage and I am a firm believer in absence makes the heart grow finder

 

[catsrule]

no

 

[BonnieA]

We vacation both ways. DH is not a disneyholic like I am so he would rather not go with me everytime. I go solo or bring a friend or relative. I have also vacationed with my girlfriend for just some girl time. DH and I just got back from a vacation together and will take another in the fall to Mexico. It works for us, it will be our 34th anniversary this year.

 

[katerkat]

Other than our honeymoon, DH and I have yet to take a vacation together (other than visiting family.) Right now, it's just his life. Being an Air Force pilot trainee leaves him with very little time off. He had to cancel on the wedding in November in WDW, so I went alone. (4-day trip) There was no way he could get out of training for the cruise with my family, so I went without him. I'm going on two more weekend wedding trips this summer without him.
In the future, I'm sure due to military scheduling I'll be forced to take the kiddies on vacations without him. I'd rather he be there, but it's life.

 

[Towncrier]

Up until a couple of years ago, the answer was a resounding NO. But then this thing called DIScon 2001 showed up and I ended up spending a week at WDW in December without my family. With two kids in school, it's not possible for them to get away at that time of the year. DW Sue agreed to be the "responsible parent" (as she likes to put it), so I went on my first solo vacation in 15 years. And I had a great time. So much so that in 2002, I went to Disney for 12 nights without the family. If there were any way that I could include them in my winter vacation, I would do so in a heartbeat.

Just so you don't think that the situation is unfair, DW Sue went on a 3-day Disney cruise in 2002 with her mom and her aunt. They had a marvelous time and the kids and I managed to do just fine without mom's help. Thank goodness it was only 3 nights.

It does feel odd vacationing without my spouse (and kids), but sometimes that's the only way that we can work things out.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Sure, we go on vacations seperate usually me, my mom, dad & kids. I like to take them up to MI to see extended family.

I wish DH could go with me all the time but he can't. He also loves his time alone in the house actually. Nothing against us but he works long hours and to come home to no one can be refreshing for him.

 

[Micca]

They aren't really "vacations" we take seperately. DW and I each have concerts or other events that the other isn't too interested in, so there are some short weekend things that come up from time to time. Until this year, neither of us had more than two weeks vacation time in a year (now it's three weeks) so we were careful when scheduling days.