This entry might sound harsh... I'm sorry if it does, but I feel compelled to write it anyway.
Actually, I think what people decide to do in their rooms should be their business, as long as it is not against the law (as in State of Florida or U.S. law) and it doesn't hurt anyone else. I personally wouldn't find much joy in exchanging vows in a hotel room, nor in any of the theme parks. Though, I'm in the minority compared to most on this forum, in that I feel best exchanging our vows (the first time and for the renewal) in a church. The religious significance behind the ceremony is important to both my husband and me, though, and may not be as important to others. Regardless, as many have pointed out before, the intimate package from Disney is actually a good value. Having a ceremony at a church with all the elements included (church facility rental, limo, bouquet, boutonniere, photographer, music, cake, champagne) actually costs a couple MORE in the long run. The decision to wed outside Disney and then continue the celebration on property with a private function is not always due to cost concerns, but often due to personal preferences or religious beliefs.
Regardless, the experience that the DFTW brides experience, whether intimate or custom, is eons different from anything that could be experienced by a couple exchanging vows on the sly. There's no shared joy with family and friends or even each other, because you'd have to be hiding what's going on! I see no fairy tale at all in doing it that way!!! I just don't understand why anyone would want that for their special day, but then I also don't understand anyone begrudging a couple who has a dream that can't come true when they try to grasp for something much, much less. Many of you are making great financial sacrifices for your wedding, and I can definitely relate considering we mortgaged our home to pay for our daughter's wedding in January just as Katrina swooped in and destroyed so much. Any couple that aspires to exchange vows on the sly also sacrifices a great deal... their dignity, the sanctity of their ceremony, the gown, the music, the ability to have a photographer to create the memorabilia to cherish their day forever, and so much more. Think of all the special touches you have added for your wedding that would be missing if you tried to do it outside the Disney system. Bottom line, there is no way anyone can feel like a "princess" doing it that way. So, is there REALLY anything to begrudge, honestly? I think not.
Everyone here talks about fairy tales and dreams coming true as if you believe it, but then when someone isn't in the financial position to make that dream come true, it seems the rhetoric changes a good bit. That's truly unfortunate. ~Ev
Oh and please don't feel that you've started a huge "debate", it's different courses for horses, and all just healthy conversation and everyone is entitled to their opinions, so I do wish you both a very happy day whatever you decide.
