DO you matter?

[teacups]

No, that's what I think about this discussion...

Ok. Thats your opinion.
But I HAVE TO ASK... why post here then? I am trying to hear what others are doing, looking for a "spark" for myself. I am not trying to be nasty Im asking an honest question.... why bother with this thread then?
I have never understood that.

Maybe it's the debate in some people? My husband is like that too, so I know its an honest thing some people do.

 

[Handbag Lady]

I'd like to think that I matter.

I raise about $1000 a year for a children's charity. I donate time when I can to various causes. I treat everyone with respect and I've been known to champion the underdog and I try to see things from different angles.

I organize one thing once a year for a group of internet friends and people have said that they really enjoy it and they look forward to it each year. I'd like to believe that it brings a sense of community and belonging among my friends.

But do I actually matter? I can't answer that question for me.

 

[C.Ann]

I owe nothing to the world,

I find this troubling.. How can we "not" owe the world anything?

It is not vain to think that you have touched the lives of people, or made a difference.
.

Absolutely not.. But I think to ask people to list specifically what they do - and then to list those things - comes very close to "bragging" - rather than just "doing" because it's the right thing to do..

If the OP just asked for suggestions on what he/she might do to make a difference - or make he/she feel as though he/she "mattered", I think it would make more sense.. KWIM?

 

[DisneyBamaFan]

Ok. Thats your opinion.
But I HAVE TO ASK... why post here then? I am trying to hear what others are doing, looking for a "spark" for myself. I am not trying to be nasty Im asking an honest question.... why bother with this thread then?
I have never understood that.

Maybe it's the debate in some people? My husband is like that too, so I know its an honest thing some people do.

Fair question. If you had asked, what can I do to contribute more - asking for ideas - I would have probably offered a few. My wife is very, very active in so many community projects. She doesn't work for a paycheck, but she gives of herself every day. If you haven't noticed, I really think that the sun shines out of her behind.

But the reasons for her "contributions" are not self serving, and this thread just seems so self-serving and pretentious. People that want to help, help - they don't talk about it.

JMO...

 

[DisneyBamaFan]

I find this troubling.. How can we "not" owe the world anything?

Why do we? What, exactly, do we owe the world?

I owe God.
I owe my family.
I owe my friends.
I even owe a few casual acquaintances and teachers.
I served my country to fulfill my debt to our nation.
But what the heck do I owe the world?

I do for others because I choose to - not to fulfill some debt. I just don't understand people who feel that they owe a debt to society. To assume some debt is to also decide that EVERYONE is in debt. Sorry, that doesn't work for me.

Do, or do not - forget the debt...

 

[Aisling]

I think I'm feeling a little depressed. I want to feel like Im making something better than it was, but right now I just am not doing it. My kids and family, yes. But nothing further than that right now. And some days not even that.

Then think of somw "smaller" things to do that will help you feel you matter. When you're at the store and the dashier or person behind you is rude, treat them gently with a smile, because they might be having a tough day. That small thing may end up being a very big thing.

 

[disneyworldluvr349]

Because the world gave me nothing.You assume a great deal if you think that I take anything for granted...

Here is what you owe the world:

-You owe it to the world to keep it clean as you use it's resources. (As it did give you that.)

-You owe it to the people of the world who are less fortunate then you, to help them. If you were in that position wouldn't you want someone to lend a helping hand? (As they give you clothing, and many many other items that you consume daily.)

You owe a lot, because it has given you life.

 

[Wishing on a star]

Okay, I do have a comment about the 'owes the world'.

I feel the same way about this as I would feel about parents who feel that just because they created an egg and a sperm, their offspring should OWE them for the rest of their lives.... My inlaws are this type... always a sense of what they are owed... everything with strings attached... It is warped and negative.

Again, one should 'do' and 'help' because one 'wants' to. Out of a selfless love in their heart....

NOT so they can pat themselves on the back and have some inflated sense of ego and self worth... because ' I MATTER '. And NOT because they bear the weight of, and OWE, some unpayable debt that they never signed on for.

There is a difference between the the words 'give' and 'pay'. (as in debt or something owed)
There is a difference between the words 'give' and 'purchase' (as in to gain something, even ego, in return)

 

[disneyworldluvr349]

Okay, I do have a comment about the 'owes the world'.

I feel the same way about this as I would feel about parents who feel that just because they created an egg and a sperm, their offspring should OWE them for the rest of their lives.... My inlaws are this type... always a sense of what they are owed... everything with strings attached... It is warped and negative.

Again, one should 'do' and 'help' because one 'wants' to. Out of a selfless love in their heart....

NOT so they can pat themselves on the back and have some inflated sense of ego and self worth... because ' I MATTER '. And NOT because they bear the weight of, and OWE, some unpayable debt that they never signed on for.

I completely agree. Maybe "owe" is the wrong word, but you should be more inclined to WANT to help after everything you have been blessed with.

 

[Feralpeg]

I've never really thought about it. I do what seems right at the time. I wouldn't know how to do it any other way. In the grand scheme of things, they only big contribution I can think of is my daughter. I feel like I brought a good person into the world. I hope that's enough.

 

[terri01p]

I dont mean to your family, of course you do.
But to the WORLD. To HUMANITY. To the BIG PICTURE.
What do you do to make a difference?
Even small things, please share them with me here. I dont think it has to be a huge thing to make a huge difference.

Honestly, To the world and to humanity, I am nothing. There is a song that goes, I am a flower quickly fading, just a wave upon the ocean, a vapor in the wind, and truely that is how I feel my life is, it means nothing to no one but my family and even then when I'm gone, I feel they would recover, like everyone else does after a while. That is exactly why I have a higher hope in things to come.

 

[Wishing on a star]

Honestly, To the world and to humanity, I am nothing. There is a song that goes, I am a flower quickly fading, just a wave upon the ocean, a vapor in the wind, and truely that is how I feel my life is, it means nothing to no one but my family and even then when I'm gone, I feel they would recover, like everyone else does after a while. That is exactly why I have a higher hope in things to come.

I agree!!!

I know that there are no religious threads/comments allowed here on the DIS. And, it is hard to respond to such a thread title without being able to mention religion.

But, I will say 'amen' to the above.

 

[DisneyBamaFan]

Here is what you owe the world:

-You owe it to the world to keep it clean as you use it's resources. (As it did give you that.)

This is something that I do for my children's sake, not for the "world". Frankly, this thought is so far out there that I can't even understand it.

-You owe it to the people of the world who are less fortunate then you, to help them.

Because they would help me if the shoe were on the other foot? Seriously? No debt there.

If you were in that position wouldn't you want someone to lend a helping hand?

I have been in that position and never expected anything from anyone.

(As they give you clothing, and many many other items that you consume daily.)

Give me? Seriously?

You owe a lot, because it has given you life.

Again, I owe this debt to God...

 

[Pea-n-Me]

teacups

Something as little as a well timed smile or holding a door for someone can make a difference, so we all have that power within us.

Don't underestimate the value of the small stuff.

If you want to do more, find something more. Like volunteer work, support, charity, etc. Or even a career change if you want.

It's going to be individual for everyone, but begin by making small changes if you feel like you want to matter more. Only you can decide what that means.

 

[mamajoan]

teacups

Something as little as a well timed smile or holding a door for someone can make a difference, so we all have that power within us.

Don't underestimate the value of the small stuff.

If you want to do more, find something more. Like volunteer work, support, charity, etc. Or even a career change if you want.

It's going to be individual for everyone, but begin by making small changes if you feel like you want to matter more. Only you can decide what that means.

YES! YES!! YES!!!!

 

[Aisling]

I am trying to hear what others are doing, looking for a "spark" for myself.

Although spiritually everyone matters (according to my spiritual/religious beliefs), there are ways to make a positive impact on the big picture of humanity, where you would actively matter.

I've been a volunteer catechist to 5th graders in our parochial school for 9 years. Along with teaching church doctrine, I work hard to teach the kids the value of life and to be kind at every opportunity. In that way I fel I matter.

I also worked for many years in a nursing/rehab home doing sensory therapy, and the key way to take that extra step and focus on how important they are even though they're confined to their beds or to comfort someone with dementia who's having an anxious day. In that way I matter.

Not everyone has the time to commit to volunteerism, and not everyone has a job that gives them opportunity to deal directly with someone's fragile emotions, BUT unless you live alone on an island, everyone can do something daily to make a positive difference to humanity.

A big thing for me is to simply talk to people. A "hi, how are you" to the bank teller, saying "thank you" to the community service people picking up trash in the parks, letting the guy with two items in his hand go ahead of you on the grocery line when you have a cartload of groceries, wave or give a thumbs up to the firefightersas they pass by...things like that. Because it makes them feel like THEY matter, and that's priceless.

It's great if on your tombstone it can be written "She cured cancer and saved millions of lives", but it's equally great to have written "She was kind to strangers". Our daily behavior impacts others in ways we don't even realize.

To the poster who said he doesn't owe the world anything, maybe so, but isn't it a good thing to do good of your own free will?

 

[C.Ann]

Here is what you owe the world:

-You owe it to the world to keep it clean as you use it's resources. (As it did give you that.)

-You owe it to the people of the world who are less fortunate then you, to help them. If you were in that position wouldn't you want someone to lend a helping hand? (As they give you clothing, and many many other items that you consume daily.)

You owe a lot, because it has given you life.

I was about to post something very similar.. Thanks for saving me the effort - LOL..

 

[disneyworldluvr349]

I was about to post something very similar.. Thanks for saving me the effort - LOL..

Glad someone agrees with me

 

[DisneyBamaFan]

...To the poster who said he doesn't owe the world anything, maybe so, but isn't it a good thing to do good of your own free will?

Absolutely, but for the joy of helping others - not to bring glory or honor to yourself or to repay some imagined "debt"...

 

[disneyworldluvr349]