Do You Have This "Talk" With Your Kids?

scanne

<font color=blue>OK, I must have really small ears
Joined
May 13, 2000
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Last night while we were giving our kids a bath, DH and I began to discuss our trip with our DS4. We were telling him about all the cool things we're going to do, which characters we're going to see, where we're staying (you get the idea!). Now, DS knows we're going, he's been there 5 times already in his short life, but now he is SO much more cognitive and really ready to be immersed in the excitement of the whole trip!

So we move the conversation to listening to mommy and daddy and following directions - which he has NOT been doing very well with here on the home front. It's a daily battle for him to stop doing something the first time we tell him.

We were explaining how important it is for him to listen and stay with mommy, daddy, grandmom and grandpop (who he calls "dude," BTW :smooth: ).

Then he asks, "What if I can't find you?"

We proceeded to tell him to find a cast member (someone with a nametag) or a security guard (someone in a uniform). He then asked, "Can I tell Mickey Mouse that I'm lost?" I told him yes - thinking that "Mickey" will inform his guide or some other CM around him.

So before bed we review with DS what to do if he gets lost. He says:

"Find a cast member or police man, or a Disney character. Tell them my name and that we're staying at the Wilderness Lodge. And I can have them check my shoe!"

We got the kids "who's shoes ID" things that velcro to their sneakers.

So, do you have this talk with your kids? How do you ID your kids in case they do get separated from you?
 
We have a Who's Shoes ID as well. I normally remind my dd every morning about staying close to us. I also make a point when she starts to wander too far about how many people are around us and it would be easy for her to get lost in a crowd (my biggest worry!). I also tell her to find a Mommy if she gets lost because I'm not sure she notices the badges. I tell her a Mommy normally has kids and pushes a stroller - plenty of those in WDW! I know another Mom would freak like I would and do whatever it takes to find the parents.

I have also reminded her in the past about good strangers and bad strangers and how we can't tell the difference by looking so she should not talk to any strangers unless her Dad, me, or her teacher is with her. We recently bought the "Safe Side" DVD made by John Walsh and the Baby Einstein lady. It's a little old for her but she was able to repeat the message back to me! I just played the first segment about strangers and staying close to your "safe side" adult i.e. Mom, Dad, teacher, grandparents.

She now FREAKS if she sees a kid without their Mom or Dad!
 
We also have these talks with our kids. We also always make a designated meeting spot if we get separated. We tell them to find a policeman, cast memeber or a large family if they cant find the first two and then we have designated the stroller rental place at each park as our designated meeting place. Each park has one of these and it is easy for them to remember.
 

If you have a little person who cant talk yet or who can but is shy, write your cell phone# Include area code so whoever finds your crying lost child can contact you, the crying freaked out parent. I also plan on putting tags on our kids to wear under their clothes with what hotel and phone #'s etc. The only "flaw" is what if a child molester or other weirdo learns our info.and harrasses us or something far fetched...I'll have to work out the kinks.
 
My DD will be 2 on Friday and her last trip to WDW was when she was 18 months. I was not really worried about her getting away from us because she is a pretty slow walker (her version running is basically just picking her feet up higher and stomping :) ), but I did get her a velcro id bracelet (in lime green, of course) that was recommended on this board that included a piece of waterproof paper with her name, my name, DH's name, and our cell phone numbers.

I also remember reading on these boards that instructing your child to locate a CM might not be the best strategy because anyone can buy a souvenir CM-like name tag and a child might not be able to distinguish between the two. I agree with the previous poster that teaching your child to find another mommy is a great idea.
 
I don't have the shoe ID tags, but every morning I write my cell phone number on the inside of the arm of my children. They know that if they get lost, they can tell a cast member and they'll be able to get a hold of me.

Another tip - if you have a digital camera, take a picture of your child in the morning before you go out, so you'll be able to describe exactly what they're wearing if they get lost. Many parents panic in that situation (understandably) and suddenly can't remember what their child is wearing. This way you can look on your camera for the picture and jog your memory.
 
We use "find another mommy" also but when we arrive I find a castmember and show our daughter what a real CM nametag looks like - you can't buy those and if they get separated and lost there is not really much risk if the child finding someone who is not a cast member based on the nametag. I show her that the stores and food places all have castmembers.

I don't use the meeting place concept because she is only 6 and is not likely to try to find her way someplace. She will have a tag of some kind that identifies us, our resort/room, and my cell phone. Sometimes I use a light luggage tag hooked to a belt loop but little girls' clothes are very bad about providing attachment places.
 
We use, "Find a mommy, a grandma or someone who is working" as a general rule. When he was younger and went to a new place we would sometimes stop and see if he could figure out who was a good person to ask if he needed. At WDW I would have expected him to go more by what the person was doing than a name tag (name tags could be stolen or faked) so the person running the ice cream cart, or manning the fastpass machine etc . . .

He's 7 now and past the prime wandering away age, and we've only had one real incident of him being "lost". He was lost to me for quite a while, but knew where I was the whole time so it didn't occur to him to ask for help.
 
We went to Pet Smart and made pink heart shaped dog tags. I put her name and my cell phone and attached it to her shoe laces.

I actually lost my dd3 at Disney last time. We lost her at Animal Kingdom on the trails back by the safari. There were 4 adults and she followed me but I did not know it. When I went back to the group, I asked were she was. The other 3 people told me she followed me. I ran back up the trail calling her name until I got to the last place I was. When I did not find her I grabed a CM, who did not have a walkie talkie. When we found the next cm I was with the group again. We told them she was missing. I did not even think to tell them what she was wearing. My aunt piped up and said she was wearing a homemade jasimine costume. A mother found her up the trail and brought her back down to the first cm, who had a microphone and called for us on it. She was gone less than 5 minutes but I never left my eyes off her the rest of the trip. I also asked my dd if she showed them her tag on her foot and in a very hesitate voice she said yes. Not really sure she did. My cell phone was in the stroller down the way so the whole plan backfired anyway.
 
Over a year ago now, we taught DS (now 3 1/2) my cell phone number. We "sang" it to him to the the tune of "This Old Man." After about 4 times he was singing with us, and by the end of the week he could sing it at any given time without thinking about it. He knows that if he can't ever find mommy or daddy that he is to sing the song to a police/fire person, or any of the other designated people we have told him about. Now, he knows both mine and DH's numbers and he knows how to dial the number on the telephone, and knows that if he is using someone's cell phone, he can dial the number and push the "green" button (I know that some have pictures of phones, or the word send...but all I have seen, the button to initiate the call is green).

I haven't decided yet if I am going to attach something to him when we are there in August. Maybe if I think I will be afraid of him losing conciousness and not being able to tell someone my number. I know he can recite it in stressful and scary situations, he's had to do it before, so I am not concerned about him forgetting it...but maybe a shoe tag, or something hanging from a belt loop with some info would be good just incase he can't actually speak...never thought of that before...off I go to look at my options!
 
I really like the tell a Mommy too. I've made my DD5 ID cards (and laminated them) off of one of the website that was recommended on here (someone else can spout it off instantly I'm sure), and we've been talking about going into a store or finding someone sweeping...doing their job...I'm taking along safety pins and plan to pin the ID cards on her in some "hidden place" just in case.

I may be wrong :confused3 but I haven't talked to her too much about Disney specifically as I don't want her to begin thinking negatively about it before our trip. I'm just discussing it in relation to the stores we are in now. Today I sorta tested her. We went to Wal-Mart and she was enthralled looking at the video games. I deliberately moved where she couldn't see me and I could see her (to see what she'd do). She called out my name a few times and about the time I was going to her, she headed to the electronics check out counter. I intercepted before she told them she had lost me, but she seems to have understood about someone doing their job.
 
I always told my DS if he realized he was lost, to stand still in the exact spot, because we would come back. It is the worst thing when you are both walking around and can not reconnect. I told him if we did not come back to go to a CM working at a shop and tell them his name and show them his sticker(inside his shirt) with our cell phone number on it.

He was 6 when he got distracted by something in AK and was left behind :guilty: I was so busy watching my sisters kids(because she was not) that I didn't notice that he had stopped. As soon as I realized(2-3 minutes) I retraced my steps and there he was, standing totally still, not even crying. He said "I didn't need to cry, I knew you would come back." :goodvibes

Marsha
 
GISELLEROL said:
what is a Who's Shoes ID and where can i get them im leaving sunday with my 3 kids

They are tags you write your contact information in, then fold over through the lace of your child's shoe and velcro closed. You can order then through leapsandbounds.com, but I don't know how quickly.

I discovered them too close to my trip as well, and just made DS shoe tags -
I put Disney stickers on heavy paper and cut around them,
wrote "Mommy's cell phone" and my number on the back,
covered them with clear contact paper,
punched a hole,
and used a small ring from a key chain to attach it.

DS didn't complain about wearing them because they were Disney characters. And we did ask him evey morning what he would do if he was seperated, and he always made a big production of holding out his foot and telling me he would show his tag to "someone at a cash register."

I also love the idea of teaching the cell phone number with a song!
 
my mom has given me that convr. many times. I'm very thankful for it, because so many kids have gotten lost!

Courtney

ps- thanks for bringing up such an important topic! :wizard:
 
I absolutly have this talk my oldest DD whenever she is going anywhere w/o me ::yes:: In fact, I put a folded up piece of paper in her pocket with her name, address, phone #, my cell phone # and my DH's cell phone # on it, in case she gets lost. She knows all this information, but I'm afraid that in a panic situation she will forget.
 
We have that conversation too. I always point out a CM nametag to my sons. The ones you can buy are a different color, they don't sell ones identical to the CM ones. We talk about how to find a CM...go into a shop etc. My oldest knows our cell # but I usually have bracelets on them with those beads that spell out the # on it. If I don't have that, they have a sticker under the hem of their shirts with the info on it.

The other thing I do is that I always download and backup pics each night onto my laptop so I start each day with a fresh memory card in my camera. Before we leave the room I take a close up of each kid's face and a full length picture of both of them. They are the first photos on the car so I don't have to try to find them if I need them.

We also have conversations with the kids on what to do if someone tried to take them. They are to scream "this is not my Mommy/Daddy!" as loud as they can. Funny story...on his very first trip to WDW my oldest was 3 1/2. We had these conversations periodically. One day we were at the MK. My Dad and my DH were watching some football game at ESPN and it was my Mom and I out with the kids. I took my youngest into a bathroom to change him and Mom waited outside with my oldest. While my youngest and I were in the bathroom my Mom initiates this conversation with my oldest. They talk about what to do if he got lost...if he was lost right then where should he go to look for a CM etc. Then she asks if he remembers what he should do if someone tried to take him away. I am walking out of the restroom when I hear him scream "THIS IS NOT MY MOMMY!" I grab my 21 month old and run out...just in time to see my mother and my oldest...with no fewer than 3 CMs running towards them...my mother turning bright red and laughing hysterically and my son looking incredibly confused. :rolleyes1 It was quite interesting explaining to the first CM to arrive there that no, she wasn't his Mommy, she was his Grammy but here is Mommy right here and he was just demonstrating what he would do if someone tried to force him to go with them. :teeth: The CM was great too...she gave him two pins from her lanyard and told him what a fantastic job he did at remembering what to do. ;) (and yes...before anyone can ask, we had explained that if he was lost and told a CM he needed help and they said "come with me" this wasn't a time to yell...that they were helping. It was for if someone tried to force him to come with them.)
 
When my girls were younger we had these talks. This year they are 12 and will have a cousin 13 with them. What does everyone think about them venturing off, while in the same park with us, for a few hours? They have cell phones and at home go to the movies on their own.... hhmmmm
Anyone had this experience?
 
PetSmart-You can make an ID with the child's name and your cell phone number in less than 5 minutes for about $5. It attached to sneakers very easily.

I agree with the "look for a mommy" line. It's also better if your kids are used to talking to adults. It sounds silly, but most aren't. It will keep him/her safe. It's far better for your child to choose someone to help her than to have someone choose your child.

All parents should read the book "Protecting the Gift," by Gavin deBecker.
 




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