Do you consider it rude when....

[MELISAZACK]

I don't mind holding it for 1 or 2 people. but not a group sorry I am not a doorman(woman) and I don't work for the establishment to make your life easier.. after the 1st person would of walked through maybe the 2nd after that I hope someone is paying attention or WHAM door and face would meet because I still wouldn't be there holding it for them.
on the other side - I do take it from folks holding if we are walking through. again don't expect them to hold it for my family or group either.

 

[ols386]

As long as you feel you are only here to serve other people's narcissistic fantasies, you will be serving other people's narcissistic fantasies. And making sarcastic "Wow, you have FANTASTIC manners, You're welcome!!!!" comments to those who don't return the favor of serving your narcissistic fantasies.

This whole issue is one of life's best lessons to us: no matter what we say, what we do or how much we complain about it, we simply cannot control other people. Pet peeves is what happens when we fail to control other people's behaviors by using the exact same controlling tactics that were used on us (and worked).

I don't think it's necessarily feeling that you are only here to serve other people's narcissistic fantasies, for me it's a matter of doing what I believe is the polite way to handle any situation.

I agree, we cannot control other people and their behavior....all we can do is control our own behavior.

 

[Heidict]

As long as you feel you are only here to serve other people's narcissistic fantasies, you will be serving other people's narcissistic fantasies. And making sarcastic "Wow, you have FANTASTIC manners, You're welcome!!!!" comments to those who don't return the favor of serving your narcissistic fantasies.

I never made a comment like that to someone, nor did I say I did. I also do not serve narcissistic fantasies. Trust me, I have one in my family. I'm not gonna serve her and I sure as heck won't be serving a stranger either.

Not sure what your definition of narcissism is, but expecting people to have basic manners is not narcissistic.

This whole issue is one of life's best lessons to us: no matter what we say, what we do or how much we complain about it, we simply cannot control other people. Pet peeves is what happens when we fail to control other people's behaviors by using the exact same controlling tactics that were used on us (and worked).

Pet peeves is what happens when you are assaulted by rude idiotic people. I'm not trying to control people, but I can certainly complain about it all I want. To tell me not to, is just a way of trying to control me.

 

[JessicaR]

I see your point, however to me, manners are in the grand scheme of things. I am sorry it is just how I was raised.

Me too. We all werent raised the same way. Those that have manners notice things like this. Those that don't walk through an open door being held by someone without so much as a thank you. Manners aren't very important to them.

My son will hold a door until the crowd coming through has passed or his father or I tell him enough. I'm not sure if the door holding is rude because its a choice you don't have to do it. The people that walk through and don't say thanks, yeah thats rude.

Every so often a thread starts on manners. Interesting to see the differing thoughts.