Another WDW vet here. I would say that I disagree that the only on property hotel that gives you the "escape" feeling is the Grand Californian. To us, the Grand Californian is nice, but is just a scaled down version of the Wilderness Lodge at WDW (with the added bonus of the closeness to the parks). We prefer and love the Disneyland Hotel. We also feel like we stay in the Disney bubble there, because you never have to leave Disney property, the walk to the parks is a short pleasant walk through Downtown Disney- for perspective it is just slightly longer than the walk from Yacht Club to the EPCOT international gateway at WDW. If you don't want to walk, you can take the monorail inside DTD, but unlike WDW, it doesn't let you off at the front gate, you get off in Tomorrowland. Security to get into Downtown Disney and the parks is right as you exit the hotel and are entering DTD, so it feels like one big Disney area (the security move was a new change this year from our 2016 visit and we loved it). The lines were never that long for us in security. For perspective, at WDW we have stayed at WL (multiple times); YC (multiple times); Poly (multiple times); GF (multiple times); BC and POR. Last year, at DLR we would up staying at the Fairfield Inn for one night as we wound up having to come in a day early and DLH was full that night. We had no issues with the Fairfield at all, but at WDW vets, being at a Good Neighbor hotel as opposed to never leaving property was a big difference. You are definitely outside the Disney bubble until you get into the parks. Also, I don't know how it is this year, but last year it took us 30 minutes to get through security on that side, and we weren't even there are park opening.
We love DLR. I would say for 2 adults a 3 day hopper would be good. You definitely want hoppers because you don't even go through security between parks and there is just a plaza between them. Hopping takes 5 minutes. We go back and forth a lot. Also, I do not know what time of year you are going, but unlike WDW, be aware that at DLR, nighttime entertainment, such as Fantasmic and Fireworks often only takes place on Friday - Sunday in the off season.