Dirt: What to do about it.....

[PandyPaws]

Dirt and What to do about it.

Dirt:
Layers of dirty film on windows and screens
provide a helpful filter against harmful
and aging rays from the sun. Call it an
SPF factor of 5 and leave in alone.>

Cobwebs:
Cobwebs artfully draped over lampshades
reduces the glare from the bulb, thereby
creating a romantic atmosphere. If your
husband points out that the light fixtures
need dusting, simply look confused and
exclaim, "What? And spoil the mood?"

Pet Hair:
Explain the mound of pet hair brushed
up against the doorways by claiming you
are collecting it there to use for
stuffing handsewn play animals
for underprivileged children.

Guests:
If unexpected company is coming, pile
everything unsightly into one room and
close the door. As you show your guests
through your tidy home, rattle the door
know vigorously, fake a growl, and say,
"I'd love you to see our Den, but Fluffy
hates to be disturbed and the shots are
SO expensive."

Dusting:
If dusting is REALLY out of control,
simply place a showy urn on the coffee
table and insist that "This is where
Grandma wanted us to scatter her ashes..."

Painting:
Don't bother repainting. Simply scribble
lightly over a diry wall with an assortment
of crayons, and try to muster a glint of
tears as you say, "Junior did this the week
before that unspeakable accident...I haven't had
the heart to clean it..."

General Cleaning:
Mix one-quart cup pine-scented household
cleaner with four cup of water in a spray
bottle. Mist the air lightly. Leave dampened
rags in conspicuous locations. Develop an
exhausted look, throw yourself onto the
couch, and sigh: "I clean and I clean and I
still don't get anywhere..."

 

[KittieKat]

ha, i like the general cleaning one