dilema - Freshmen Football or Vacation??

[PatsGirl]

Another Mom here who had no clue that freshman football started weeks before school did and ran into the same free dining DIS trip dilemma Divorced, only son, first year of organized football, who knew? I gave DS a choice and he chose to stay with family members while his sister and I went on vacation. He continued with three sports while in high school and missed most of our family vacations. He worked full time during the summer when sports were out of session so that wasn't a great time to take vacations either, hard enough getting football camp weeks off, every Saturday until Thanksgiving, no M-F during baseball season, etc.

We discussed that his playing high school sports was NOT going to get him a scholarship into college (he played first string but still...) or into the pros so I considered it a leisure activity (read CHOICE) that he could do or not do and when making that choice, he would be giving something else up. He chose sports. I always tried to fit in a few weekends trips (winter skiing, summer beach getaways) around his sports and work as well.

 

[golfgal]

That's not what I'm talking about at all. It's the jockhead mentality that some schools have-all you have to do is be eligible, grades are not important, family is not important. Talk about commitment...what about the commitment to family? And-I have seen some ridiculous coaching mistakes. This year, our football team was practicing on the field next to the soccer team. There was a tornado spotted about 6 miles west of the school and the sirens went off. I went to get my son from soccer because I knew they'd be in and we only live 3 blocks from school. The soccer team was in and in the hall, away from glass and protected as best the coaches could. The football team was still practicing. The coaches made the call. The winds came, the sirens continued to go off...the football team stayed on the field and practiced. This is the type of thing the football programs all over our country do and get away with. I've seen it for years and it's dangerous. Kids dropping from heat exhaustion-the boy code-footballers thinking they can bully anyone because they are the footballers... and parents and coaches who think that football is to be worshipped-more important than family-are just sending these kids into an unreal world. Yes, you commit to something-you stick with it but geesh, people, pay some attention to what your children are being asked to do. It's no wonder we, as a country, are in huge trouble when people place so much importance on high school football. And before you say I don't get it....oh, I get it very clearly.

This has nothing to do with a 'jockhead' mentality and everything to do with signing up for something and being responsible enough to be there when you are supposed to be. Our marching band is MUCH more strict about these things. While our football team is one of the best in the state, there certainly isn't any preferential treatment for football players at our school.

 

[Nancyg56]

I'm sorry, I disagree. It sends a message that if you sign up for something you stick with it even if that means sacrificing other things.

ITA. This is only the beginning. Once kids commit to something they need to stay with the commitment, sports, music, drama. I believe that before students make that commitment parents need to determine if they are willing to allow that commitment to avoid asking the kids to compromise their involvement.

My sister's girls were active in sports and once tehy made it to the HS level the year was pretty much cone. Between soccer, basketball and softball, and don't even consider the summer sports.............there were few vacations. But the girls were commited so my sister commited as well. There was sacrifice but becasue they all knew it going in the grls were not asked to make a choice after the fact.

 

[Disneycrazymom]

It is so true that the family has to be as committed as the child! But along with having to schedule carefully or even missing out on a vacation comes a short time of such fun and new friendships for the whole family. DS is a senior this year. He is involved in drama, show choir, improve, jazz band. He played hockey until it was just too much and had to chose hockey or drama. We have had to wait until the last minute to plan vacations, we have had to go with out him and even had to cancel plans to travel during this 4 years. I would not trade it for anything!!!

We have watched our young athlete discover he can act and sing! who knew? We had the pleasure and privilege of taking his sweet girl friend with on her first Disney trip last summer. We have got to know great kids who work hard and try to do the right things to succeed. The years have gone so incredibly fast! I will be sad to see it end on graduation day. But I will know he has had the full high school experience! 0 hour to 10 pm rehearsals! It is only 4 years and did I say it goes fast really really fast!

 

[golfgal]

Just a heads up for any middle school parent moving into the high school realm, almost ALL fall activities/sports start before school starts in many parts of the country. Check your school calendars for information.

 

[Disneycrazymom]

Just a heads up for any middle school parent moving into the high school realm, almost ALL fall activities/sports start before school starts in many parts of the country. Check your school calendars for information.

And try outs for most teams will be at the end of the 8th grade year or before school starts. Check the school web site often.

 

[Colleen27]

This has nothing to do with a 'jockhead' mentality and everything to do with signing up for something and being responsible enough to be there when you are supposed to be. Our marching band is MUCH more strict about these things. While our football team is one of the best in the state, there certainly isn't any preferential treatment for football players at our school.

I think there's a fine line there, and some programs do cross it. I understand summer practices and conditioning up to a point, because games generally start at the same time school starts (actually, a week before classes start here). But expecting a year-round commitment for a team sport really does reflect our overall culture by which entertainment is valued more highly than education or family IMO.

I have no problem with the requirement that my son be available for football for the duration of the season (2nd week of Aug until Friday after Thanksgiving, including playoffs) but when you read things like a previous poster talked about with year round practicing and only a 3 week mandated break during which they're expected to continue conditioning without the coaches? No way.

 

[golfgal]

I think there's a fine line there, and some programs do cross it. I understand summer practices and conditioning up to a point, because games generally start at the same time school starts (actually, a week before classes start here). But expecting a year-round commitment for a team sport really does reflect our overall culture by which entertainment is valued more highly than education or family IMO.

I have no problem with the requirement that my son be available for football for the duration of the season (2nd week of Aug until Friday after Thanksgiving, including playoffs) but when you read things like a previous poster talked about with year round practicing and only a 3 week mandated break during which they're expected to continue conditioning without the coaches? No way.

Well, don't expect your child to play high school sports/activities of any kind then. I don't know of ANY activity that doesn't require some kind of off-season work. Even with the band, you can't expect to play during marching band season and not pick up your instrument again until the next season and be at a level at which your band plays. It just isn't realistic. Most kids here do at least 2 sports so the "off-season" for one sport is "in-season" for the other and since they are still conditioning and training for that other sport, that suffices. In the summer most kids play their favorite sport. If a child ONLY plays football, stops working out after play-offs, does nothing until mid-August, do you REALLY think they will make the team .

 

[undertheradar]

For those with incoming freshmen, most Fall sports hold parent/participant meetings in May. Freshman football begins the last week of school and they participate in passing leagues and hog tournaments for the duration of the Summer. They also have the 3 week "quiet" period and are expected to participate in conditioning unless they are out of town. As others have said, if you don't like it, don't sign up. You will be paying just as much for your student to participate as the parents of the starters. There is no minimum playing time and parents are not welcome to discuss playing time.

 

[Colleen27]

Well, don't expect your child to play high school sports/activities of any kind then. I don't know of ANY activity that doesn't require some kind of off-season work. Even with the band, you can't expect to play during marching band season and not pick up your instrument again until the next season and be at a level at which your band plays. It just isn't realistic. Most kids here do at least 2 sports so the "off-season" for one sport is "in-season" for the other and since they are still conditioning and training for that other sport, that suffices. In the summer most kids play their favorite sport. If a child ONLY plays football, stops working out after play-offs, does nothing until mid-August, do you REALLY think they will make the team .

I don't object to all off-season work, just the expectation that it should be 1) year-round or nearly so and 2) mandatory the kids make every session.

Our state has rules limiting practice seasons, particularly those outside of the school year. Football can't start more than a few weeks before the start of the competitive season and they can't run year-round. We have a high school football program that goes deep into the playoffs every year and won the state title a few years back, but it doesn't demand a year round commitment even of top players.

DS's youth football coach is an all-state starting defenseman for the high school team, and we've talked quite a bit with him about what DS should expect as he transitions from youth ball to the school program. Some of the football team runs track in the spring for conditioning, but others join the school's fitness club to have access to the weights and cardio machines in the school gym without the demands/requirements of a second competitive sport. They're expected to stay active and stay in playing shape, but not in a "You have to be here Mon, Wed, and Fri all year, with only the weeks off that we schedule, or you won't play" sense.

ETA: Band here is a class, so there's no question of putting the instrument aside and not picking it up until the next marching season - marching season requires a weeklong camp in August and twice weekly practices for the duration of football season, but for the rest of the year band is 95% in-school time with the occasional after school rehearsal and of course performances (and those are scheduled at the beginning of the year - the band director is great about getting the full-year schedule to the kids during the first week of classes so parents can plan around that commitment).

 

[golfgal]

I don't object to all off-season work, just the expectation that it should be 1) year-round or nearly so and 2) mandatory the kids make every session.

Our state has rules limiting practice seasons, particularly those outside of the school year. Football can't start more than a few weeks before the start of the competitive season and they can't run year-round. We have a high school football program that goes deep into the playoffs every year and won the state title a few years back, but it doesn't demand a year round commitment even of top players.

DS's youth football coach is an all-state starting defenseman for the high school team, and we've talked quite a bit with him about what DS should expect as he transitions from youth ball to the school program. Some of the football team runs track in the spring for conditioning, but others join the school's fitness club to have access to the weights and cardio machines in the school gym without the demands/requirements of a second competitive sport. They're expected to stay active and stay in playing shape, but not in a "You have to be here Mon, Wed, and Fri all year, with only the weeks off that we schedule, or you won't play" sense.

Our teams have "practices" whenever, Mon-Wed-Fri in the off season, for example. They aren't mandatory but if you don't make most of them the chances of you playing the next season are greatly reduced. Our state has very strict rules for COACHES in the off season but not the players. Coaches can't have contact with the kids but the kids can have their own practices or they work out with another coach. We have a "strength" coach that basically mans the weight room after school. He works with ALL the kids on strength programs through out the year but since he doesn't coach a team directly, there is no violation of the rules. Again, if you are playing another sport, not an issue making those off season times because you are doing the same thing with another team.

There are some schools around here that if you don't train year round you simply won't make the team because the schools are so big and there is a lot of competition for the spots.

 

[Colleen27]

There are some schools around here that if you don't train year round you simply won't make the team because the schools are so big and there is a lot of competition for the spots.

Our high school is fairly small, which probably makes a difference too. We even have boys who play football without quitting band - the band director allows them to work out an alternative schedule for the marching season to make up for the fact that they can't participate in the marching part of the course requirements.

 

[golfgal]

I don't object to all off-season work, just the expectation that it should be 1) year-round or nearly so and 2) mandatory the kids make every session.

Our state has rules limiting practice seasons, particularly those outside of the school year. Football can't start more than a few weeks before the start of the competitive season and they can't run year-round. We have a high school football program that goes deep into the playoffs every year and won the state title a few years back, but it doesn't demand a year round commitment even of top players.

DS's youth football coach is an all-state starting defenseman for the high school team, and we've talked quite a bit with him about what DS should expect as he transitions from youth ball to the school program. Some of the football team runs track in the spring for conditioning, but others join the school's fitness club to have access to the weights and cardio machines in the school gym without the demands/requirements of a second competitive sport. They're expected to stay active and stay in playing shape, but not in a "You have to be here Mon, Wed, and Fri all year, with only the weeks off that we schedule, or you won't play" sense.

ETA: Band here is a class, so there's no question of putting the instrument aside and not picking it up until the next marching season - marching season requires a weeklong camp in August and twice weekly practices for the duration of football season, but for the rest of the year band is 95% in-school time with the occasional after school rehearsal and of course performances (and those are scheduled at the beginning of the year - the band director is great about getting the full-year schedule to the kids during the first week of classes so parents can plan around that commitment).

Marching band here is 8 hour/day practices Mid July-early Aug with a week away at band camp with a 7:00 AM start to midnight lights out. After band camp and drill week they move to 4 hour/day practices until school starts where they go to their band class every day and 3 hours/twice/week in the evenings. Every Saturday is a competition and they usually practice for several hours before that (usually starting around noon, leaving for competitions around 7:00 PM). Many kids do both band and a sport but usually after freshman year they do one or the other just because of time.

Kids have band through the school year in school, but they still have to practice outside of school and most take private lessons on top of the lessons they get in school. Band is a HUGE commitment here. The football coach also makes sure that the football team is sitting in the front rows of the auditorium for the band concerts (wearing their football jerseys) too.

 

[maxiesmom]

Our teams have "practices" whenever, Mon-Wed-Fri in the off season, for example. They aren't mandatory but if you don't make most of them the chances of you playing the next season are greatly reduced. Our state has very strict rules for COACHES in the off season but not the players. Coaches can't have contact with the kids but the kids can have their own practices or they work out with another coach. We have a "strength" coach that basically mans the weight room after school. He works with ALL the kids on strength programs through out the year but since he doesn't coach a team directly, there is no violation of the rules. Again, if you are playing another sport, not an issue making those off season times because you are doing the same thing with another team.

There are some schools around here that if you don't train year round you simply won't make the team because the schools are so big and there is a lot of competition for the spots.

It is the same around here. I posted last year when I was trying to plan a trip with my sis and her kids. The day after the kids were out of school for the year they had their first "open gym". Around here that is how they get around not being allowed to have practice. They call it Open Gym. Between all of her different sports there was litterally 2 times during the summer where my niece had 4 days off in a row without any commitment. Two times! And just this last xmas break they had basketball games both weeks!

It is frustrating, but if there is a lot of competition for spots on the team (and here there is!) then you have to decide or let your child decide. Is it more important to make the team or take a family vacation then? As much as you may dislike it, it may be an either or thing.

 

[smb6]

This is the kind of stuff I'm worried about when my kids start HS, right now were in middle school and already pretty intense... I don't have any in football- but one in cheerleading, 2 in band, 2 in basketball, and 1 cross country- and they are intense! For now the rule is- you miss a practice (even if it's sickness, death in the family, whatever) you can't play or participate in that weeks game.... So, I can only image how HS will be.....

 

[maxiesmom]

This is the kind of stuff I'm worried about when my kids start HS, right now were in middle school and already pretty intense... I don't have any in football- but one in cheerleading, 2 in band, 2 in basketball, and 1 cross country- and they are intense! For now the rule is- you miss a practice (even if it's sickness, death in the family, whatever) you can't play or participate in that weeks game.... So, I can only image how HS will be.....

Here high school is the same way. Just this week 2 girls had to sit out basketball games because they missed practice. One missed 2 games beause she missed 2 practices. One for vacation, and one for a league soccer game. And that girl was the team's starting point guard.

Sports/band are a huge commitment. One the whole family needs to support. It is way different then way back when when I was in high school, that is for sure!

 

[luv2mickey]

As the mother of a senior boy who played football all 4yrs of high school I say don't skip football! High school is hard enough socially and i believe my son playing football was the best thing that happened to him during high school. I watched his confidence grow, his work ethic is impressive and he always hung out with kids who cared about grades, integrity and are very respectful. But it is very important for you as a parent to encourage the commitment to the sport. This is a sport where they need to protect each other and the best way to accomplish this is through being a team and everyone does their part.

 

[december]

My son is in 7th grade, and we are already tied to the school's schedule. I teach, and he plays football, basketball, and baseball. He hunts with dh during Thanksgiving break, Christmas and Spring break, and doesn't want to vacation then. We are out of school in June and July. The baseball team plays during June. So we will vacation in July. When he gets to high school, he will have football practice the last couple of weeks of July, so next summer's cruise is booked for July 8-13. I talked to the coaches before I booked anything for this summer or next. Sports (and hunting) are important to him, and having him on vacation is important to me, so we deal with it.

BTW, I booked a 3 bedroom/3bathroom townhouse with a pool, PS2, 4 tvs/dvd players, high chair, safety gates, etc in Windsor Hills for $100 (tax and fees included) per night-much better deal than anything Disney is offering!

 

[minkydog]

Here high school is the same way. Just this week 2 girls had to sit out basketball games because they missed practice. One missed 2 games beause she missed 2 practices. One for vacation, and one for a league soccer game. And that girl was the team's starting point guard.

Sports/band are a huge commitment. One the whole family needs to support. It is way different then way back when when I was in high school, that is for sure!

This is the way DD17s show choir operates. They have mandatory practices twice a week after school, on top of their inschool rehearsals. If you miss a practice for ANY reason, you will not be allowed to dance in the number they rehearsed. They teach it once only and will not go back at reteach stragglers. DD broke her foot and had to be in a a boot most of the fall. She is the student choreographer. She made every practice except for one, the day she went to the orthopedist. She even taught the routines while wearing her boot. Come time for the show, sure enough, she exits the stage when a certain number came up and rejoined when it was over. She wasn't upset and neither was I. I understand what the teacher is trying to accomplish. He's trying to run a professional-type show. Believe me, those kids do NOT miss rehearsals if they can help it. As they say in the theatah, "The show must go on~

 

[Pembo]

The football coach also makes sure that the football team is sitting in the front rows of the auditorium for the band concerts (wearing their football jerseys) too.

I like this!!!