Difficult day, need hug

[Hannosmom]

We took our daughter to Woodrow Wilson Rehab Center near Charlottesville, Va today. She's 21 and my last child, hence "my baby". She was a 7 week early preemie and got pneumonia when she was 6 weeks old. She has mild cerebral palsy, is hearing impaired and slightly mentally retarded. She's also only 4'6", weighs 80 pounds and is the sweetest person you'll ever meet.

She will be there initially for two weeks for a vocational evaluation. She's never been away from home and we left her in this big dorm room all by herself, no roommate. She just called us, a little teary, and the last thing she said to me was "take care of Honey for me." Honey is her kitty. She posts on the community board as "ChiChiHoney".

Anyway, I feel a little lost and teary myself and desparately want to numb this pain with food. I'm trying to resist, but it's very hard.

 

[perfectmatch300]

{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}
On their way, Linda. You know eating won't really help how your "baby" is feeling. How about spending a little extra time petting & playing with Honey? There's nothing as soothing as petting a purring cat, & besides your hands will be too busy to eat!

 

[karebear1]

{{{{{{{{{{{{{ HUGS }}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

You poor thing!! You left your baby and had to go home by yourself? That had to be incredibly difficult to do! How brave BOTH of your were to allow that to happen. Try to think about how this will benefit her in later years if you can. i know having your last one leave the nest is very hard, but I think your sopecial circunstance makes it that much more difficult. Please know that you will be in my thoughts sand prayers for the next 2 weeks! Hope everything turns out well for your DD... and you!

 

[AlreadyexcitedGrammy]

{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}
Prayers, special positive thoughts, PD, and just plain down right - I am thinking of you via extra fast, air waves.

Hope they are there by now!

You are a very special woman - and your DD is too, may you be just surrounded by love so that you can get through this time.

Keep us updated - too.

 

[Beanie]

Extra special hugs, Linda!! That must have been extremely difficult to do...Please let me know if I can do anything for you...I am always here!!

 

[bsnyder]

Linda, my heart goes out to you! As a mom, it must have been incredibly hard to leave her there!

Please know that we are here to support you, whenever and however you need it!

 

[geetey]

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{LINDA}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

My babies are still too young for me to have them leaving the nest, but even the thought of it makes me teary-eyed! We are here for you!! Thoughts, prayers and pixie dust heading your way.

 

[tiggerlover]

{{{{{BIG HUGS}}} Linda. I can feel the sadness in your post. It is such a difficult thing to be apart from our children when we don't want to be and I can see how easy it would be to turn to food. But you need to be strong, you have the power to control what goes into your body. Why not work on a special welcome home project? This could occupy your mind and your hands as well as give your DD something nice to come home to.

 

[TigH]

{{{{{{{{{{Linda}}}}}}}}}}

Long distance hugs for you, my pal! Please don't eat anything. Make yourself a nice cup of tea and find a cozy place in the house and have a good cry. Bless your heart. It will get better, trust me!!! I wish I had the magical words to make everything all right for you, but I don't. Just know that she is in good hands and this is something she is going to learn and grow through, something positive that will add to her life experience and help mold her into an even stronger, more independent person. She sounds like a real doll, just have faith that all is well and she will enjoy these two weeks.

I don't have kids, just a dog and two cats. Ross moved to Florida while I stayed home to sell our house. The dog moved with him and I missed her terribly. I know it's not the same, but she is like my daughter. I saw her two weeks after our move and just collapsed on the floor crying and holding her. I felt so bad because I knew she missed me but she didn't understand why I wasn't living there with her. But everything was fine! Ross was taking good care of her, I knew she was safe and comfortable in our apartment in Florida and I had the BEST visits with her over the next few months until we sold our house. So as much as you miss her and worry about her, just try to relax and know she is in a safe environment with caring people who are going to do their best to make her feel comfortable and happy.

Love ya, Karen P.S. I'll come by the hut later and we can dip our toes in the water and look for seashells. Drinks on me!

 

[RaySharpton]

Oh my...I can't even imagine how difficult and sad this must be for you.

God bless you, best wishes, and encouragement, RaySharpton

 

[wovenwonder]

How lonely this must be for both you and your daughter. If you'd PM me her name/address I'd be happy to send a card off to her!

 

[lmhall2000]

If you can send her address- I'd love to send her a card too!! Just knowing that she's not as miserable as you are is a big help. Sending hugs and special wishes- I even have a Disney pin that says "You'll be in my heart" it plays the song- I could send that to her!!! Just let us know!!!
Tara

 

[PRINCESS VIJA]

HUGS to you and your DD! Hang in there, this must be so tough for you. I agree with perfectmatch300, play with Honey, it will help you feel closer to your DD and keep your hands full. Then, I would plan a welcome home party!!!

 

[mowsie dreamer]

{{{{{HUGS}}}} Linda. How brave you and your daughter are! I know this is difficult for you both. It's so hard to be parted from your children, I imagine it's even harder with your youngest. PD and prayers are on their way.

I'm very proud of you that you posted here about your urge to numb your pain with food. Keep busy for these two weeks and stay strong! We're here for you, just let us know how you are doing!

 

[CDoobee]

{{{HUGS}}}, Linda.

I know what it is like to have a "differently-abled" child. Hilary is my oldest child. We were alone together for 10 years before I met my DH, and she was 12 and 18 when I had my other 2 children. She had never lived away from home until 2 years ago when she got married and moved several states away. We're doing okay with it, but the house is sure a lot quieter! ( , sorry, Hil!) and the family definitely doesn't feel whole.

I haven't seen her for a year and it was very hard for both of us a couple of months ago when she was sick and in the hospital and I couldn't be there. And she is 30 years old! She's been hospitalized many, many, many times in her life, but I was always able to be there. But we will be going to visit in a little under 6 weeks!

Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that I really DO know how you feel! Everyone here has great suggestions for you. I expecially like the ones about spending extra time with Honey (we will be burying Hilary's bunny, Bandaid, today ), and planning a great welcome home party!!!!

{{{{HUGS}}}}
Debbie

 

[Tink33]

Hugs to you Linda. How about sending your daughter a care package. You could include healthy snacks, notes telling her how much you love her for her to open every day, pictures from home, a tape with kitty meowing and purring, pre-addressed stationery and stamps so that she could send you some notes too. I am sure you could be more creative and think of things to include.

When you think about eating, go for a walk or take a bubble bath, or play some of your favorite music and dance.

 

[minniecarousel]

Linda, buddy, so sorry to hear that your daughter is away from home - remember that this is important for her future. (this advice from a Mom who suffered from pretty bad "empty nest" problems when her boys went off to college!) Hang in there - I hope today is better.

{{{{{{HUGS!!!}}}}}

 

[Hannosmom]

A MUCH better day today, I'm sure it is thanks to the googles of hugs, pixie dust, prayers, a good wishes from you all.

DD called one last time, in tears, wanting to come home. DH and I put on our strong parent disguise and told her she couldn't call again tonight and she needed to go to sleep. Then I went to bed and sobbed for a while (and I DID NOT eat).

So, she calls this am. She is dressed, hair and teeth brushed, and bed made eek: ), ready to head to the dining hall. She is back to the strong, perky young lady that I know so well. Hope tonight goes smoothly. If not, it's back to the strong parent disguise.

Cdoobee, I remember when your DD was in the hospital. I threw pixie dust your way for quite a while, because I knew how you felt. My DD has had 3 major surgerys and I was with her the whole time until she came home.

TigH, I totally understand the doggie/kid thing. We have two doggie daughters that we adore, but unfortunately they were still in the kennel when we got home. DH will be bringing them home this afternoon, so I can get my hugs in then.

I guess the one really good thing about this, other than feeling so comforted by all of you, is that this is the first time in almost 29 years (our oldest son will be 29 in August) that DH and I will be alone again.

Thank you all so much!! My diet is intact and so is my heart thanks to all of you!

 

[KathyTX]

Oh, Linda!! I wish you were close enough to hug in person!

I'm glad you both sound stronger today. Trust that she's having a great, independent adventure. She'll be home soon.

(I sent you a PM...)

 

[nativetxn]

Linda, I feel really bad that I didn't get to post to this when you needed my support the most. I have an excuse (it's hard to get online when your computer is being worked on) but it's still just and excuse.

I'm sending you my phone number via pm. You use it when you need to talk, okay.

{{{HUGS}}} my sweet friend. You are such a strong person, you make me proud. Being strong doesn't mean you don't hurt, though. I'm sorry I missed this yesterday

Katholyn