Dear school,
I wish you were actually going to be occuring tomorrow. I don't particularly like you, but I like the people I see there. Ah. I can't wait for Tuesday.
Haylea.
Dear Brittany,
I just read your bulletin, and I wonder why you think you let me and your mother down. Is it because of the ice cream thing? Cus you don't let us down. You never have. I completely understand why you think you suck at life, because I, too, sometimes feel this way. I just...today when you came over you were happy...other then the fact that Fresa chewed up your shoe...and now your bad feelings are bubbling up to the surface. I guess we have more in common then we really think.
Haylea.
Dear Ms. Diaz,
Sorry I suck in your class. I'm trying to not. I mean I know that a D is a really bad grade considering I had an A...but I did lose my book for a week and I finally got it back, and I know that's not really a reason to not have my work, but I really am trying. I need some help in your class. You think that we can get all of the material done in less then six weeks, but we really can't. You need to slow it down. And what about the people that have been absent? They are going to have NO TIME to finish everything you've asigned.
Haylea.
(Brittany's Little Sister)
Olivia,
I don't hate you, but it's pretty darn close. You are a teachers pet and you think that you can get away with anything you want. But thats not completely true. And just because Rachel called you a *bad word* you have probably put her somewhere far away from anyone that she likes. I wish you weren't the Co-Op. Because now with this seat change coming up, I'm probably going to end up disliking you even more.
Haylea.
Dear Nick,
I've been thinking about life and such...I'm not sure what exactly I think anymore. I like you, yeah. And I've been going over in my head why I like you. And each time I think the same exact things. That's not bad at all, because I like what I like about you. And the funny thing is Sam, who doesn't go to our school, is following suit and saying that me and you would make a good couple. I know that I shouldn't assume, but I've heard from a little birdie that you like me. BUT you're not sure if I like you, and I don't talk a lot so how are you ever going to find out? I have no clue how to clue you in on the little secret I've been keeping from you. Maybe I should just come out and say, "Hey, Mr. Nicholas, I like you. And whenever we look at each other, you know the way we do, I get a random urge to kiss you. and i'd feel funny kissing you if you didn't want to kiss me back" this is like....random mumbling. argh. whenever i think about you all my thoughts get scattered around, and whenever i look at you i don't know which way is up, and which way is down. this sounds so clichè because everybody says it to everybody. but its true. have you ever thought that the reason i don't talk when i'm around you is because i'm too embarrassed to, and if i said something stupid i'd be even more embarrassed. but i guess if the birdie was actually correct you shouldn't care. but thats just what i think. well. i can't wait to see you on tuesday, and instead of you hugging me i may hug you.....
MAY being the opritive(sp) word. actually i probably wont because i'm not that forward. oh well...at least i thought about it.
Haylea.
Dear Matt,
I can't believe that you really thought that I didn't know what the holey cheese was...although that was a really funny conversation.
.
Haylea.
Dear Christian,
Accept. Accept. Accept.
Please?
Haylea.
Dear Katherine,
I hope you and Matt have fun driving together tomorrow. Even though he's kinda p-o-ed at you. I wonder why...oh well. Not my life, can't medle. But I hope that you have sooo much fun.
Haylea.
Dear Mr. Lance,
I'm taking you up on that offer. You said that if we needed help to come to you and you'd get us a tutor. I need that tutor. Even thought it's kind of embarrassing....I need all the help I can get after I got a D in foods class. I mean Foods class, really?
Ha-lee-ya.
Ms. Latini,
I HAVE CANS FOR THE HOMELESS!!! Woo. Go me! I love the homeless! I'm not being sarcastic either. I know a few.
Haylea.
Dear Katherine,
(Kinda continued...but a different thought I just got)
What if. Ok. You know I'm a big what if person. But we have a field trip on the first of October. Ms. Latini's class does. That means I'm going with Mr. Nicholas...oh no. You know that urge we've talked about? What happens if I get the urge there? What am I going to do? Ah. Why didn't I think of this before? What happens if I kiss him, then walk away? Thats bad, thats really bad. What happens if I kiss him and stand there? I've never done that. I've only walked away. But really....what happens if I just walk up to him and tell him I like him in front of his peeps? Oh goodness. I should just stear clear of him then I guess. Thats not cool. I like looking at him...but when I do you know. What happens if I do kiss him and Ms. Latini sees? She absolutely hates PDA. And everything like it. What happens if he kisses me? Although that probably won't happen...what if he asks me out? I should say yes. No? Yes? I don't know. What if we want the same muffin and there's only one left? Do they run out of muffins? I just don't know. What about drinks? What if there is only one cup left? They don't run out of cups...I don't think. Oh goodness. What happens if we both go to the bathroom at the same time and we run into each other? What about on the bus? What if I have to sit with him? What would we talk about on the ride there? What if he sits in front/behind me and I don't know about it then I talk about him? Would that be bad? I mean if I did talk about him and I said that I liked him would that really be bad? Or would that be a good thing? what happens if i do something really really embarrassing...like body wise? what if i trip over him while getting on/off the bus? you know i'm not the most graceful person, so what would happen if i accidently fell while getting off the bus and he's in front of me? why do i have to be full of what ifs? well...uh. have fun tomorrow...today.
Haylea.
Dear Chicken Dance,
Why must you be so amusing? I can do you sitting down, without all the reallly real motions and I still laugh really hard. I can barely breath...wow. That is just great...
*I don't wanna be a chicken, I don't wanna be a duck, so I shake my butt hahaha*
Haylea.
Dear Song,
Gosh you are almost as good as the chicken dance. I love the CD your on. Ha. I love kid music. I mean...it's amusing.
Haylea.
Dear Nanny,
Why must you think that just because I'm 14 I'm not old enough to have a boyfriend? I can't tell if your being funny or not. You have a habit of doing this, but Brittany, your other grandaughter, was walking to Arby's playin tonsil hockey with Mr. Thomas. And you think that it's bad for me to want to have just a boyfriend? And what's up with you thinking that I'm going to be a floozy? I'm not, I know how to say NO. So...I'm just letting you know right now. The boy I like isn't like that. He's nice. He's not one of those that thinks he can get into the denim, or whatever fabric it may be. Or at least not to me. I've let people know I'm not like that and if they want that they shouldn't think to ask me. I'm not going to be a pregnant fourteen, 15, sixteen year old. I understand what abstinicy(sp) is and I plan to stay that way until I'm married. I don't want to get pregnant becuase I know what it can do to my life and my family's lifes too. So, I don't think that it's a bad thing I want a boyfriend. Who knows, it may make me happier. Think like that.
Haylea.
Dear Pappy,
Just because you're married to Mrs. Robinson doesn't mean you have to agree with everything she says. You could have said it was okay with me to have a boyfriend at age fourteen, but I guess you don't think it is okay. I mean Rebecca does. But you and Katie don't. I guess it's the age difference.
And it was very mean of you to make fun of my zit. It's not my fault. I mean I use the astringent, and I clean my face. But they just keep getting worse and worse. You almost made me cry...thanks
Haylea.
Dear Zits,
I hate you. Why does astringent and water + soap not rid me of you? Ahh. STUPID!
Haylea.
Dear Aunt Jo,
Please go back to Flordia. Your screwing up my life talking about all the great tides you've surfed. I hate you. Seriously.
Haylea.
Dear Sam,
Never doubt yourself or your feelings. They are there for a reason. Just trust.
Haylea.
Dear Self,
Okay, maybe you should give the keyboard a rest.
Or not.
I know that you have many doubts in life but you have to overcome them. Everybody has doubts. and they only get in little ruts because of them. if you like Nick why don't you just tell him? is it because you don't know what he'll think and you don't know if the little birdy was lying or not when they said he liked you? maybe if you talked a little more and actually got into a conversation with him he may actually like you more. maybe just ask him? you have no clue what to do about this situation do you? you like him. you like him a lot. you really like him a lot. you really really like him a lot. ok...i think everybody gets you like him. so why not make the first move? be
BOLD be
DARING be a
new you. you could make it work. and don't forget that there is always a light at the end of any tunnel, no matter how long, how dark, how cold, how frightening. maybe it just so happens that new is light and old is dark. just remember that no matter what you do, live your life with no regrets and i'll try to stop talking in quotes here.
Now. You have to get organized. You have to sit your clothes out for the week so that'll be done. You have to change purses, and you have to work on anything and everything you possibly can to get that D up. Although I'm not sure how I'm going to do that with out my foods book. argh. stupid haylea. why didn't i grab it before i came home?
It's late and you've taken up a lot of room, so i'd go to be now if i were you...
oh wait i am you. so i'm going to bed now.
You.
Dear TB'ers,
I'm really truly sorry for making you have to scroll through all of that...
Haylea.
