Cutting back when you still have a "believer"...

[marcyinPA]

If my child was complaining after getting such a big ticket item as a Wii, I would be returning it. 10 is old enough to start learning the value of an item over how many items one gets.

Actually, I never said he would complain. What I asked was how do you go from giving a lot of gifts from Santa in the past, to giving just a few, and most of them shared with your brother, when one kid still believes in Santa.

He is actually a very grateful child and a very giving child. It's more my hang up, I'm sure, about not being able to provide like we usually do.

Thanks for your opinion though...I'm sure it is one that is shared by many, myself included. Thankfully I don't have a kid like that!

 

[elan]

Maybe you could just make the unwrapping last longer. Wrap the items in several different boxes. Maybe do a scavenger hunt (even the clues could be wrapped). I like the idea of the coupons. The year my kids got a wii our gift was a coupon book. Most of the ideas cost nothing. (get out of trouble free, sleep in mom's bed, etc.) They loved it.

 

[Evi]

I'm a believer and I'm way over 10

But I agree with some of the other posts. Maybe you can incorporate a lot more family holiday activities and make some new traditions for the holidays. Its hard when we set expectations on ourselves but you know the kids may be much more well aware than you think of current finances and there's nothing wrong with letting them know times are tough and christmas has more meaning than just gifts.

I'm sure your boys will have a wonderful holiday and once they set up that wii and your playing as a family all your worries will go away =)

 

[robinb]

Just my opinion (and it means nothing) I don't understand why people must insist on 10/11 years old believing in santa. My oldest says his cousin who is 11 1/2 still wholheartedly believes. I always thought Santa was a "little kid thing" and don't understand how perfectly smart 10 year olds still believe or that their parents still let them believe

You are not alone in your opinion as I share it. I just can't wrap my head around the thought that some of my DD's fellow 5th graders still believe in Santa. If so, I would be tempted to say that some parents want to keep them little kids.

In the spirit of full disclosure, I believed in Santa as a child but my DH is Jewish and my DD never believed. We don't do Santa so we have never had to cross this bridge.

 

[inkedupmomma]

Believe it or not there are still innocent children out there. I think it is fine for older kids to still believe...there is no sense in making them grow up any faster than they need to.

agreed! I feel like it is being implied that my dd who turns 9 in 2 weeks is some sort of weirdo for still believing

 

[inkedupmomma]

I have a friend who just had to tell her 11 1/2 year old DDs that Santa isn't real (?!?!). I asked her if they were surprised and she said they were but they were okay with it (?!?!)

Kind of shocked me --- I mean, we're talking Junior High/Middle School age kids here. I think this goes beyond "innocent" and boarders on totally naive.

Can you imagine if these kids would have gone back to school after Christmas break talking about what "Santa" brought for them?? They would have been made fun of big time and embarassed to no end!!!

what the bigger problem in everything you have said, is that a kid would go to school and be made fun of and embarrased over something like that. I'm not sure how other people raise their kids, but my kids are raised to respect other peoples beliefs. That may not have to agree, but they do not have to make someone feel bad for believeing something else.

and really who cares how naive a child is? in a very few short years they will be full blow college students, and I am quite sure they will know better. either way. Kids should be naive at that age, not at all adult like. smh.

Thank you!!! At least YOU understoond what I meant!!!!!

I feel ya too. Idk why the word innocent had to be blown up in the first place. Clearly you were using it in the unaware sense.

 

[marcyinPA]

If so, I would be tempted to say that some parents want to keep them little kids.

You say this as if there is something wrong with it...My DS is 10...to me he is still a little kid! Why do parents want their kids to grow up faster these days???

His believing does make it a little harder on ME, because I have to be more creative in a crappy financial situation. I don't think his believing is hurting HIM though. He's a smart kid and will figure it out (or give it up, if that IS the case) when he's ready.

 

[robinb]

You say this as if there is something wrong with it...My DS is 10...to me he is still a little kid! Why do parents want their kids to grow up faster these days???

Why do parents want their kids to remain little kids forever? I see my DD becoming more and more of a tween every day and it's a pleasure to see her grow up. Sure, she's still a kid but she is also on her way to becoming a young woman. BTW, I just asked her if any of the kids in her class believed in Santa and she said "no".

I'm sorry that you are stuck in a hard place with the whole Santa thing. I think there have been some good ideas for you here if you want to continue giving gifts from Santa.

 

[mum4jenn]

Heck...I am 48 and I still get gifts from "Santa"!!

 

[luvmy3]

Honestly if my youngest still believed at 10, I would just be honest and tell them the truth.

 

[spima3]

Honestly if my youngest still believed at 10, I would just be honest and tell them the truth.

Well, it's your child so you are entitled to think and do as you believe. I, however, would never do that to a child; and I consider a 10 yr old still a child.

A friend I know had a child w/ learning disablilities. He was often picked on in school by the nasty little kids, and when he hit 12, his mom felt he needed to be told about Santa because she didn't want the other kids to have any other ammo with which to needle him.

It broke her heart to have to do it, and he cried terribly when she told him.

 

[spima3]

delete

 

[KKB]

How do you do this? Money is extremely tight this year, and we decided to buy our boys one big gift...the Wii. I think we are the last people in our town to buy one, but that's another story for another day! lol

So, they are getting the Wii, the extra controllers, and a couple of games. It adds up, as you know, to quite a bit of money. My 14 year old obviously knows that the gifts are from us, but my 10 year old still believes in Santa. I was thinking about making the Wii system from my DH and I, and the games are from Santa. Santa has always brought more than that...my bad We teach our kids to be thankful no matter what, but you now, they are still kids. I wish I could just break the news to my 10 year old that Santa is US.

I've already told him that Santa is on a tight budget this year because of the economy, and his reply was that Santa MAKES the toys...he doesn't buy them. UGH. Well, Santa has to pay the elves, insurance has gone up, fuel has gone up, etc. etc. My DS wasn't buying it.

Anyone else BTDT with their kids? What did you do?

In our house getting a Wii is certainly NOT cutting back!
I notice my children getting very "thing" focused around birthdays & holidays...we step back & make lists about what is REALLY important when they get like this. Our society is so "stuff" oriented, I HATE it.
My budget is $200/kid...it used to be $100, but as they become teens, THAT is tough. But half of that budget is things they need--new sweatshirts, etc.

DD was 10 last year & still believed...DS13 said it was important for her to know before middle school, that kids would make fun of her. So we had a visit after Xmas...she was sad, but this year she said she is glad she knows, that she would be made fun of this year--middle school can be vicious (DH is a middle school teacher--he agreed on this one). Heck, I had it figured out by second grade...
It is special to believe...but we have always sold it to the older ones that it is special to know and still help a younger one believe. NOT sure how that will work with #3....perhaps we can sell it on the him being santa for younger cousins...

 

[eliza61]

You know, I think actually a lot of the problem is "perception". Just like with disney, we have this perception of a good Christmas as kids opening "tons" of packages brightly wrapped under the tree.

I wouldn't stress to much about it, I find kids are really flexiable. If he has a long list (mine always did) ask him what he really, really wants and leave it at that.

You've already told him that Santa has had to cut back so there you go.