Curfew for an 18 year old

[JoeThaNo1Stunna]

I am 19 and also a live at home college student, don't have a curfew. My 18/19 year old friends that live at home and go to college also have no curfew. If your kid went away to college you would have no control over how late they stayed out, so just because they are at home instead of hundreds of miles away you think the curfew issue should change?

 

[Chattyaholic]

Our DD turned 18 in October of her senior year of high school, she did still have a curfew (usually midnight, but negotiable at times when something special was going on) until she graduated. She was going off to college in a couple of months and wouldn't have a curfew then, so I didn't feel she should have one the two months before either. If she didn't know "right from wrong" by then she never would. She was always very responsible, and even after taking the curfew away she rarely stayed out "too late." Occasionally she and her friends would go to a midnight movie and then stop somewhere for a bite to eat but that wasn't very often. But even then she would always call earlier in the evening if she made plans that would make her come home quite late.

 

[AMClvsMKY]

Hey nowellsl - hi there fellow gator neighbor!


Although my oldest is only 13 I agree that once they turn 18 they are considered adults and should be old enough to not have a curfew. However, consideration, such as a phone call, would be nice and greatly appreciated.

 

[TIdoublegaER]

When I turned 18, the curfew went out the window even though I was still living at home. That doesn't mean there weren't rules to abide by - but as long as I let my parents know where I was going and what time I thought I would be back that was fine. If plans changed, all I had to do was call and let them know.

 

[AngieBelle]

Another one here who never had a curfew. As long as my parents knew where I was and about what time I'd be home, they were fine with it. I was always good about calling if I thought I'd be late. I hate for people to worry about me. I also rarely stay out really late anyway.

 

[supercarrie]

I am almost 17, and have never had a set curfew, either. The rule has always been to let my parents know where I will be, and what time I am expected home. Then call if my plans change. Usually I am home by midnight, but there have been times when I was out later. I have had a cell phone for all of high school that they can use to call and "check up on me" if they wanted to. (They never have, though.)

 

[Puffy2]

Dag gum, I must be getting really old or something. I can't believe how many of you are saying "no curfew" for an 18 year old still living in your house!

When they turn 18 there has to be incentive to get them OUT of your house - living on their own, supporting themselves, - the reward of hard work or doing well in school and finally getting a good paying job is choosing your own rules. Until then, they will have to go by MY rules if they want to live in MY house.

I had a brother who didn't come home one night when he was in his early 20's and still living at home. My father politely told him to find other living arrangements the next day - which he did without arguement or anger (he knew the rules upfront). It's just the way it was then - either live by the parents rules or DON't , but don't whine about it when you have to find somewhere else to live.

In our home, our adult children will have a 10pm curfew on weekdays and a max of 1am or 2am on weekends. They also have the option of not coming home at all if they let us know the evening before. But I won't have this "come and go as I please" nonsense. Let them get their own house for that.

Just my two cents.

 

[nowellsl]

Thanks everyone for responding -

We talked about it and came up with 2:00 a.m. as a mutually agreed upon curfew (on the weekends). She's happy with that and at least I don't have to worry, unless she's not home or hasn't called by then. It's not that I don't trust her - I definately do, I just would worry sick if she were out all night (I draw the line there). I do believe there is a difference when college students live at home and when they live on their own. It's a consideration as well as a safety issue. You wouldn't want your husband/wife or any member of your family out all night without knowing where they were!!? I'm 43 years old and I still let my parents know when I go out of town or am away from home for more than a day - hopefully someone would know when to start missing me should something happen!

It's been interesting hearing from other young adults - my daughter never once suggested that she should not have a curfew! I even suspect she has used her curfew as an excuse not to do something she really didn't want to do - fine by me! I always had a curfew and I understood why. It never made me want to go out and go wild when I finally moved away - although I have quite a few friends who did.

Anyway, thanks everyone! I really have enjoyed your input and opinions!

Hey AMClvsMKY, are you in Gainesville?

 

[AMClvsMKY]

Yes! I am in Gainesviile. We moved here from Illinois last August and we are loving it!!!!

 

[Serena]

My oldest says she's moving out on the day she turns 18, so at the moment, I won't have to worry about this.

But she's 17 and her curfew is 11. Later if we discuss it and she's been acting responsibly lately.
I will talk to her about her curfew for the summer, and will let it be later, but I'm not telling her that yet. lol

 

[Evil Princess]

TECHNICALLY my cerfew is 12:30-1:00. I am 18 years old. Honestly though, since high school began I never really broke cerfew. I always let my parents know where I am, call them if I change locations, that sort of things. They can always reach me by cell phones, and I never gave them a reason not to trust me.

Because of that, I am free to waltz in the door around 2, 3:00, as long as I tell them first.

Half the time I'll be in at 12, sometimes there isn't anything to do. Sometimes, though, there will be something going on.

Last weekend, for example. My boyfriend and I started the night off early, 5:30 dinner. We tried to see a movie but everything was sold out in two theaters, so we went back to his house and watched a movie. We were tired afterwards, and I had work in the morning, so I decided to come home at 10:00. Saturday night my friends and I went out later, around 9:00, had a fun night, lots of stuff do do, and I didn't get home til 2:30. My parents knew where I was and what I was doing.

 

[SoonerKate]

My curfew while I was in high school was 11 pm, later on the weekends if I had a good reason (and my cell phone turned on so my parents could get ahold of me) I turned 18 a little less than 2 weeks before graduation, so my parents decided I didn't really need to have a curfew at that point. I didn't go crazy or anything that summer, but it was nice to not have to be home at 11 -- I could always finish watching movies or just hang around with my friends for as long as I want, which was important to me at the time since it really was our last summer together.

The first summer I came home from college (I was just 19) was awful for a while-- I was used to living in the dorms and coming and going as I pleased, and I pretty much kept doing that at home which did not make my mom happy. We talked about it, and basically agreed that as long as she knew where I was or where I was staying if I wasn't coming home, then I didn't need a curfew. Of course, the threat was always there that if I didn't call and let her know what was going on, she could impose one on me.

My second summer of college, I had to move out of my sorority house in the middle of May, so I actually moved out early and got a summer lease (May, June and July) in a local apartment complex, so there were no curfew problems that year. In August I was getting ready to leave for my WDW College program, but as long as I kept in touch and let her know what was happening and when (or if) I'd be home, everything was fine. My mom still got a little ticked at the beginning of the summer if she didn't hear from me every couple of days, but she paid my cell phone bills at the time so I had no problem calling her!

 

[crazelion]

Man wow. I did not have a curfew at all doing my teen years. As long as my mom knew where I was.

I still live at home with mom is 29 years old but I pay for all the utilites and come go as I please. Sometimes I have been known to come in at 4:00 a.m. morning.

I live at home because it cheaper for me then it is live in apartment.