Considering DVC...but have a "non-disney loving" spouse

[senorak]

I'm taking Jon's (Disney Daddy) advice and posting this new thread. As some of you may know from an earlier thread (Not buying DVC), I've been going "back and forth" on the DVC decision. Since returning from my first trip to WDW in 8 years, I've been leaning towards DVC...but with some hesitations. My biggest: DH is NOT and "Disney lover" and has no desire to return to WDW in the near (read: next several years) future. Said he prefers going to amusement parks locally and going on the "thrill rides" to WDW. Just wondering if there are any others out there w/ "non Disney loving" spouses who have bought (or considered buying) DVC.....did you travel w/o your spouse? Did the "non-Disney" person come around to love WDW? This is probably my greatest "block" to buying DVC; along with the limited time of year in which I can travel (summer/holidays/weekends) and have to use higher level of points. Thanks.

DEB

 

[wdwendyd]

I used to be almost embarassed to ask my husband to go to WDW again. I felt like I was "making" him go on this very expensive vacation. After several years, I found that he really LIKES going! He has come to realize that this is a great place for a REAL vacation! Because we know WDW so well, everything is easy to figure out and plan unlike other trips where you don't know what places to visit or where to eat or where to stay and "We should have done it THIS way" and Why didn't we ...?" etc. My husband likes that when we go, EVERYONE is happy, even my Mom and 2 teenagers (not a small feat!)

 

[jel0511]

I have to tell you that I HAD a non-Disney loving spouse, until I did finally convince him to buy DVC and he since LOVES IT!!! The one reason my dh didn't like Disney, is that he always felt rushed and after 4 days was tired and wanted to go home. After our first trip home, he said he never knew that Disney could be relaxing!!! I had to fight him tooth and nail just to get the 175 points, and we just added on 50 more, at his request!!! It's like a complete turn around, I can't believe it. As I've read on your previous post, you have to go in the summer time, due to you being a teacher. We have to go in the summers also due to having a school aged child now. We have enough points for 5 nights in a 2 bedroom every summer, 9 nights every other year, or a week during the holidays every other year. Maybe if you worded it to dh, that it would be much more relaxing knowing you would always be going back AND if you would go every other year, maybe that would convince him. We have enough to go every year if we want to, but will probably go every other for a longer vacation, since we like to travel to other places other than Disney.

 

[maryp]

Senorak, my dh never cared for wdw either, but we bought enough points for him and I to go for a week in the spring in a 1 bdrm, and points for a week in a 2 bdrm for me, daughter and grandkids!
We went down for 4 days to check out dvc (my anniversary present for our 30th!!!) and I never rushed him, we left the parks at noon for a nice lunch, enjoyed the pool (and pool bar!) in the afternoon, back to parks late afternoon, followed by dinner....he came home and told my in-laws (Totally non wdw people!) that we had a blast and were buying in!
Since he was able to relax, his views changed. So when I go with him it is a much different pace than with kids, but is really very nice!!!

 

[shelbyjosh]

After several trips to WDW and 2 stays at OKW (using family members points) my DH finally came to the conclusion that DVC would work for us. Our first trip (as a family) was 2/97. He assumed that we would go every few years. We went again 3/99 and was in total awe of OKW but overwhelmed at the cost. We went again 3/00 and by the end of that trip, he had me on the prowl for a good resale. At first he could not imagine us going once a year. Yet, he realized that we are seeing and doing new things every trip. We became members 4/00 and took our first trip as members 9/00 and went back again for our annual March trip this year. He said 2x in 1 year was just too much for him. Me...I can never get enough! He says I am too "Disneyfied" and too wrapped up in all of it. I just tell him he is crazy! He will tell me know that he can't take all the Disney "stuff" but you can be sure that when he is down there we are 2 peas in a pod. He is a kid again!! I am sure you will make the right decision and if you choose NOT to join, then maybe that will work for you. But, it is not cheap and it is not for everyone. We just feel that for us and our 2 kids(6,3) this is perfect!! Good luck in whatever you choose!!

 

[ZerasPride]

I don't get the opportunity to post as much as I used to but I just had to add my two cents here. My DH is NOT a Disney fan at all. We have been down to Disney three times in the last 18 months and his opinion has not changed and more than likely will not change in the future. This past May he never left our room at the Poly except for his obligatory ride on Test Track.

Anyway, I think some people are just NOT Disney lovers and I know there is nothing I can do to MAKE my husband care for Disney the way I do. Having said that, I do feel there is room for compromise. We are going down to Hilton Head for our anniversary during Thanksgiving week and I am hoping that 5 days in a 2-bedroom villa will convince my DH that DVC is for us. He likes to relax on vacation and does not like the rushing around that we do at Disney on property so I am hoping I can convince him to buy the minimum points with HH as our home resort. This way when I feel the need for a Disney fix, DS and I can go down for a few days and stay in a studio and still have points for our HH stays. I told him if he agrees to buy in that we can do Disney (HH or on property) stays every other year and the alternative years we can do whatever he wants.

I am keeping my fingers crossed that this will work out for us and I hope you and your husband can come to a decision that will make you both happy!

Lisa

 

[senorak]

Lisa- I think I have a lot in common w/ you...and your "non-Disney' hubby. It's not that my DH feels "rushed" at WDW...he simply doesn't enjoy it.....finds it "boring" and the rides are not the type he enjoys (would rather experience "thrill rides"---huge coasters, fast moving, etc. and there aren't too many of those at WDW. He is not a "vacation person" to begin with....I am the one who plans all our trips. He enjoys hunting (tho not too often, lately) and would rather spend a week at home reclining on the couch watching old movies than going anywhere. It really wouldn't matter whether we stayed in a hotel room or 2BR villa. He did like the ease in getting in/out of MK & Epcot by staying in the Poly. He definitely is not a "kid" again when in WDW...in fact, I get disappointed that he is so "uptight" and "adult". I will have to discuss HH with him....he does like golfing, so perhaps that is the way to go. We are just now beginning to travel farther from our home (other than the NJ beach and Poconos) as the little ones are getting easier with traveling (ages 4, 6 and 11) longer distances.

DEB

 

[PKS44]

Senorak-
My spouse was unsure of the DVC thing for some of the reasons already stated--she felt rushed at WDW and overwhelmed by the parks for 4 days...This is exactly the reason DVC was right for us- so we would go more often, do less park stuff, more leisurely and yet have a nice place to feel comfortable in for a week...WHy would hbe like WDW if he saw it as crammed into a hotel room with 4 other people with sore feet for nine days...As for your hubby who would "rather spend a week at home reclining on the couch watching old movies than going anywhere. It really wouldn't matter whether we stayed in a hotel room or 2BR villa." If you had a 2BR villa he could spend the time on a couch watching movies on the VCR (both of which you would not have in a hotel room) Also there is more to Orlando than the 4 parks of WDW (gasp!)..seriously- when you are down there staying for 8 or 9 days every other year (instead of once every 8 years), take a couple of days to go to Universal where he will find the thrills he seeks, or the water parks in and out of WDW or he could go parasailing or golfing at WDW or you could go to HH or VB sometime (he could fish)...I am not trying to convince you that you must join, I myself vacillated many times before taking the plunge.

Paul

 

[ZerasPride]

that is exactly my DH's idea of a vacation - relaxing in front of the tv! He used to be a thrill a minute roller-coaster type person but even that has fizzled out for him. We live about an hour or so from Cedar Point and he shocked me a few weeks ago when he said he doesn't want to do ANY amusement parks again!

I think Hilton Head might work for you as I hope it works for me. I like a little rest and relaxation on a vacation but I also like other scheduled activities and I think HH might just hold the key to both of us being happy. Of course DH is not happy about the price of DVC and is worried that we really can't afford it so I have a couple of other obstacles to overcome but am hopeful by the end of the year we can be members and be "welcomed home". I can't wait to hear those words!!!

Lisa

 

[RAMWDWFAN]

Senorak,

I have the same problem you have. The whole family went to WDW for the first time in 1998. My DS and I have returned five more times since then. My husband will not come back with us. He hates WDW!

I was a DVC owner (you can purchase without your spouse), but I sold it because of pressure from my husband. Once my DS is in college though and I have all my credit cards paid off, I will buy into DVC again. I loved being a DVC member and dream of the day when I rejoin the ranks.

I have plenty of friends and family, including my DS, who enjoy WDW and would jump at the chance to go with me. Although I miss my husband when I'm at WDW, I don't let his un-Disney attitude keep me from going.

 

[Lisa P.]

For the first few years, DH just indulged my whim and we visited WDW several times a year. He's never really been a typical theme park or resort vacation person, much preferring camping, boating & hiking with our family. He always had a pretty good time when we went to WDW. But it was never a thrill for him. Over the years, his limited enjoyment at the parks has dwindled to the point where he only accompanies our family into the parks because he wants us to spend vacation time together. It's his compromise.

For my part, I no longer press him to visit the parks more than 2 days per trip. He really enjoys sailing and the water parks though, especially TL. So we always include time for those on every Orlando trip. We visit one or two other destinations in between Disney trips. Sometimes, I drive to FL with the kids (& others) for a week and he flies down to join us for the second week of our vacation, doing mostly non-Disney things. Timeshares that get us out into nature, especially on a waterfront with rental boats... those are the ones that make him smile.

IMHO, a person who doesn't really care much for WDW may change their view. The problem is, you don't know for sure which way it'll go. With enough time spent there, it may grow on them. Or the flicker of interest may burn out altogether. Hard to know. If you've been there several times together, you may be able to tell which way is more likely for your DH.

 

[Granny]

I skimmed through this thread so I apologize if this has already been mentioned.

Some people think of Orlando and think only of Mickey Mouse and the gang. There is a lot more to do there, and that's one of the reasons we decided to buy into DVC. Maybe you can sell your DH on the idea of Orlando as the destination as opposed to Disney.

Does your husband golf? Disney alone has 99 holes of great golf! And of course, many more courses in Orlando.

Thrill rides? Universal's two parks and even Sea World and Busch Gardens provide a few places for wrenching the stomach.

Other things to visit? Kennedy Space Center, the beach and other Florida destinations are within an easy day trip of Orlando.

My DW thought I was nuts when I suggested DVC! Not because she didn't like it but because she didn't think we could afford to go to Orlando every year. DVC makes that possible and we have better accommodations than we ever did on previous trips.

If nothing else works, I'd go for the separate vacation thing. No reason to go through life without any fun!

 

[baileybrad]

I am not trying to be too hard on your spouse but if your little ones enjoy WDW, then he should get over himself. The most fun that we have on vacation is watching our kids enjoy themselves. It is great to spend a week or so with them in a safe, family oriented place such as WDW. My spouse didn't care for the thought of going to WDW every summer once the kids are school age so we decided to buy at HH. We love it. We try to alternate our trips between the 2. But have been fortunate enough to go to VWL this past Feb., HH this past May, and OKW in Oct. Obviously, once our little ones are in school this will have to change. This was the reason for making HH our home resort. The good thing about HH is that it is a fairly easy drive. And no park passes required. It is a wonderful place for a family vacation and is a first class operation. We both love the thrill rides that other parks offer--Cedar Point in Sandusky, OH is where we spent 2 nights of our honeymoon but we also can't wait until the little ones can enjoy IOA at Universal. Our 3 year old rode the "water mountain" (Splash Mtn) 6 times in February and had a blast. Hopefully, if your family feels that the DVC is right for you, it will bring you many joyful family vacations. Which is, after all, what the world is all about---family.

 

[doubletrouble_vb]

Being unmarried I can't help you with that part. However I do have a suggestion. Why don't you go to Disney & skip the theme parks? Or if you have a parkhopper ticket do all the thrill rides (rocknrollercoaster, tot, testrak etc) in one day. THEN...if you feel like it...go to Universal's IOA or Blizzard Beach...maybe try out Disney Quest...but otherwise take it slow... fish, golf, take out a water mouse....if the money's available do the Richard Petty driving experience.

In other words see what Disney has to offer a person who doesn't want the Disney magic. However I do have this caveat...unless you are certain it will grow on him I would buy a Marriott or other timeshare in a non-Florida location (Brigantine for example). I would then trade into Orlando whenever I wanted to go there. No you wont be onsite but you will be in a position to compromise on where you go and what you do...for less money.

 

[dvcdudes]

I find it funny how everyone mentions their DH as the non WDW lover. Well it's the oposite in my case. My DW is not exactly Mickey's biggest fan.
Actually it's the theme parks she doesn't care for. She loves the resorts. She loves the restaurants. She loves the DVC rooms. She just dosn't like the lines and most of the rides in the parks. She doesn't like the crowds and rushing around.
Since we bought DVC it's given us more time and we don't spend as much time in the parks and my DW likes this fact. Here's a link to a post I wrote about our last trip. We didn't go into any of the major parks.
My DW said this was one of our BEST vacations ever. I have to say... even though we didn't go into the parks... I agree.
As for your DH, you might want to stress all there is to do at WDW, HH or VB. It's not just Rides.
WDW (DVC) has some of the nicest resorts I have ever seen. You know you will always get Disney quality and there is something to be said about going to the same place each year or so. It's familiar and it makes it nice.
Good luck but I wouldn't push too hard. There is always cash ressies.

 

[Candace]

I am married to a man who not only doesn't enjoy WDW, he doesn't enjoy travel or vacations. He is a workaholic and truly loves what he does. I am a teacher with two boys, and I bought into DVC in '94 - without telling him. He would have thought I was nuts! So I bought in with some money that I had inherited, so I could take my boys on vacation to a lovely place that had plenty for kids to enjoy, and where I could feel safe traveling as a single parent. Since '94, we have been probably 15 times or more to WDW, and my husband has been once. He went Thanksgiving '99 and enjoyed OKW accomodations a lot, (he actually was very impressed!) but we didn't "make" him do much. We went to MGM so he could do TOT with the kids (and he just shrugged when asked if he liked it), and we went to EPCOT to do Test Track (again, not much reaction). I will never make him into someone who loves Disney or loves to travel, as I do, but I won't stay home because of it either! Now, that being said, we are spending this weekend at Wilderness Lodge Villas in a one-bedroom. I can't believe he agreed to go, but I just booked it and told him later - airline tickets and all. No kids, just us - probably no theme parks. He has to be away - far away- from his business to really relax, and I think a beautiful setting is just what he needs. I think if I get him to HH, he would like it too. Only you know what will work for y'all, but if giving great vacations to your kids in a wonderful and pretty safe location is important, then consider DVC. Good luck!

 

[Lesley]

No good input here as my dh converted me to Disneyism on our honeymoon! But I wanted to send out a big "Hi Neighbor" from over here in Boyertown.

As they say "It's a Small World"

 

[senorak]

Candace- Sounds like our hubbys are "two of a kind". I already take several "getaways" w/ the kids and w/o hubby and take (lead) a student tour to Europe almost every year, so I do quite a bit of traveling w/o DH. And, like you, I am considering purchasing DVC with financing from an inheritance. I know I will always have someone to travel with---whether it be my kids, other family, friends, etc. And I know I will NOT change hubby's apathy (not quite aversion) to WDW. From reading all the info....it sounds like OKW or HH would be for us....now I have to research the resale market.

Lesley- Wow...another person who lives in "the valley". Nice to meet you!

 

[BraveMom3]

I'm yet another with a spouse who doesn't "get" mine and our kids obsession!! This May/June was my fifth trip with children, ages 9, 5, and 4 now. My first as an adult was when my oldest was 3 1/2 and I was expecting my second child. We went with my Mom, and that was the pattern for a couple of years. Well finally on the third trip, I convinced him to fly down for 3 days of our trip (that's all he can be gone from our business, and probably all of Disney he can handle!) He loves sharing in the kid's enthusiasm, since they don't stop hopping and skipping the whole time we're there. Well, the next year we arranged to be at the WL for his 3 day trip, and he absolutely loved the WL, and he is pretty hard to impress. He was unable to join us this year for our trip, but gets a kick out of how excited the kids are when the talk of WDW.

When I first brought up the idea of joining DVC, and the minimum buy-in of $11,250, he freaked!! I went through the whole spill of how I could have paid for it with the money I spent on accomodations the last 5 trips. We stayed 14 nights this year split between WL, BC, and CS, and it's VERY expensive!!! Well, I could tell that he just doesn't get it, but if it was something completely practical, like a boat for instance , he would understand it with no problem!!

My solution was I just FedEx'd my papers and payment today for VWL, and I'll just continue to plan our Disney vacation like I have for the past 5 years, and eventually I'll let him in on it!! I figure we're going to go anyway, and I do know that this is the most economical way for us. When you consider that we're a family of 5, and the accomodation situation is going to get complicated for that period of time when he joins us, especially as the kids get bigger, and the fact that he is spoiled, and will definitely appreciate the upgrade, I feel that it's a no-brainer!!

Fortunately, I have my resources, and was able to do this on my own. I must say that it's a relief to know that I won't have to sweat the huge 'lodging expense' every year from now own. Just have to get this purchase paid off, so I can add-on at BC!!!