Come on people ..

[World Showcaser]

But, OP, you are doing exactly what you are complaining about by starting this thread and on the wrong board no less. You started a thread with a preachy OP on a hot button issue that you admitted would result in a debate. It sounded like you were just trying to stir the pot by complaining about people who stir the pot.

You say you are all for free speech. Well, that includes allowing people to be snarky or express themselves differently than you might.

And I know for certain that I have been one of those people who commented on your grammar. I wasn't intending to be rude. I seriously had difficultly understanding what you were trying to say in a different thread.

While I agree we all have different opinions, the point OP is making here is that there are more productive ways to express them. Coming onto disboards shouldn't be an exercise in personal growth.....just provide information politely and move on!

This seems to go against the very natured of the DISboards. It is a community. That's why I like it so much. It's not the kind of place where people come and ask only straightforward questions with clear right or wrong answers. It's a place where discussion is encouraged. As a community, there will be personalities of all different types. Some will think certain behaviour is rude while others will think it's refreshly honest. I don't condone name calling or personal attacks, but I seldom see that here. But to complain that people disagree and go beyond providing basic information seems silly to me.

 

[maxiesmom]

Sorry to take this part of your post somewhat out of context, but I think that ignoring rudeness on message boards is the best way to handle it, especially on a moderated board. Threads like this one get the pot stirrers riled up IMO.

It is very hard, if not impossible, to tell people they are being rude and snarky without being rude and snarky yourself.

For me, I would rather have people be honest about what they are thinking, then being fake nice. Maybe people don't have to be mean, but they don't need to cover their words in sugar either. Plus, there are one or two posters who I've run into who are as sweet as pie on the public forum, and then send you PMs full of poison and nastiness. I'd rather be able to take people at face value and not have to wonder what they are really thinking.

 

[juliebug1997]

Exactly. People are full of woe because guests at Disney are increasingly rude and uncaring about others. And then people defend being rude and obnoxious here -- a Disney site. The connection is pretty obvious. I somehow doubt all the rude people here go to Disney and are sweetness and light and show consideration for others. We all need to look in the mirror when we complain about how our society is becoming a pack of dogs.

This isn't a Disney site. It's not run by the Disney company. It's a site about Disney. I think there is a distinction there because, if Disney ran this site, I don't think there'd be as many posts about how the new FP system sucks, how to get around the drink cups at the resorts, etc. Since it is not run by Disney, things aren't "Disney-fied".

 

[FairydustyPrincesses]

The DIS is very tame compared to some of the message boards I've been on *coughbabycentercough*

** * * Pregnant hormonal women, sad, frustrated TTC women and sleep deprived moms of newborns and toddlers with keyboards is a dangerous thing. Better to jump headlong into a pit of vipers!*

I just think sometimes that the "bully" word gets used a little too frequently lately.



I'm sure I'm on quite a few "ignore" lists. I'm fine with that though because I realize that some people hear a dissenting opinion as a criticism. Nothing I can do about that.

Yes! And not just here, in our country in general. I think dr. Phil and local news are required to cover at least three bully stories a month. It's overdone and a manufactured crisis!*

Kids do need to be taught to be nice, but I think the underlying issue of all the bullying epidemic is the sense of entitlement and all the feelings based teaching.*

Kids need self esteem but the whole give everyone a trophy tell everyone *they are the mostest specialist magical child has bred a generation of people who are self centered and only value their own wants and needs. It leads them to see everyone else as less worthy and therefore deserving of being treated poorly. Especially if they come in the way of precious and whatever he or she thinks they deserve.

Also, it makes people unable to handle criticism so everything is seen as bullying..*

I have to agree with the posters who say this board is tame compared to others. Rarely do I see personal attacks, but just strong disagreements. That's what a DISCUSSION board is all about. If you aren't up for the debate, don't participate.*

The only time I feel the need to get involved in such debates is when a poster is blatantly wrong about factual information. When people like you, OP, come on here seeking advice and are reading wrong information, it doesn't reflect well on the board and leaves you with incorrect info. So the posters with wrong info need to be corrected - whether politely or "impolitely" depending on the stubbornness of the incorrect poster.

Telling adults how they should and shouldn't behave on a public message board in a free country will absolutely be received badly - you are correct. The other way you could have gone about this is just state your opinion and leave the commands out of it. You really can't tell people what to do.

And for the record, these kinds of threads start the exact debate of what you are complaining about. So this will continue the cycle...

That pretty much sums this thread up perfectly and every thread like it on every message/disussion forum in the world.


Also I've never undersold the "if you don't agree with me don't post" mentality. I know some will post dissent in a more gracious manner than others, but just like in life you encounter Manu different personalitis. As an adult Yoi should be able to handle such encounters without getting a bruised ego. I think there's a whole issue in our society of not being able to deal with others and everyone thinks their feelings are more valued than others so when they aren't agreed with they get hurt or upset.*

We all have different views! It's wonderfully interesting! Not harmful!
!

For me, I would rather have people be honest about what they are thinking, then being fake nice. *Maybe people don't have to be mean, but they don't need to cover their words in sugar either. *Plus, there are one or two posters who I've run into who are as sweet as pie on the public forum, and then send you PMs full of poison and nastiness. *I'd rather be able to take people at face value and not have to wonder what they are really thinking.

Yep authenticity is a trait that seems rare in so Many people. I'd much rather someone tell me their true feelings than wear a mask. I can always see through it and can never trust them.

 

[JerseyJanice]

didnt necessarily mean on the message boards, meant in life

I knew what you meant and it's why I apologized to you for taking your remark out of context. I was trying to point out to the OP as well as other newbies that it's best to ignore snarkiness and let the mods handle it if someone really gets out of line.

BTW, Disneynuts, I didn't see anything sarcastic about "killing them with kindness." Anything can be construed as sarcasm, I guess, but I agree that kindness is a very good approach, both in real life and on the internet.

 

[andyman8]

People are, usually, very defensive of their opinions, and when someone expresses their disagreement, a minority of posters "attack" them. I don't believe it is intentional. Many of the people on this board (including I) love Disney and can be, at times, a bit irrational about criticism towards it. I mean there's a difference between being hypercritical about everything and criticizing Disney's pricing structure.

As for "bullying," I don't believe that would be the correct word, rather being rude, for bullying implies it is intentional. The argument that people need to "suck it up" just enrages me, though. I have extremely thick skin, to5 I was born with only one working eye (the other is a "fake eye") and have been quite open about it. Obviously, as a child, I felt with a lot of bullying being called names from "one eyed freak" to "cyclops." I simply stood my ground, now, mind you, that was at school, but here we are on a forum which is supposed to be a form of "escape," yet I see rudeness on nearly the same level.

I also don't understand why people are hating on the newbs. A user's "post count" is irrelevant to treating others poorly. All in all, people being mean to each other does not make a forum more interesting, except to (maybe) those who are dishing out the insults, rather turns others' method of "escape" into a place that slowly erodes one's self-confidence (this is not my case, but I can see it happening to some). Just, think before you post!

 

[Cyrano]

Moving as not related to WDW planning

 

[andyman8]

I forgot to mention that this is, by no means, the Mods or Webmaster's fault. They do a great job at what they do and they, simply, cannot be online 24/7, and no I am not trying to "suck up."

F.Y.I.: I think the DIS is very informative and thank all the DISers for over one year of answers to all my Disney questions and tons of great Disney discussion!

 

[kaytieeldr]

BTW, Disneynuts, I didn't see anything sarcastic about "killing them with kindness." Anything can be construed as sarcasm, I guess, but I agree that kindness is a very good approach, both in real life and on the internet

Ah, see, right there - confusion!

I didn't mean the phrase was sarcastic, or even the point of view. I meant the actual - attitude, or more to the point, the expression or delivery of that attitude - could be viewed as sarcasm.

 

[JerseyJanice]

I meant the actual - attitude, or more to the point, the expression or delivery of that attitude - could be viewed as sarcasm.

Just saying that any written phrase on any topic at all could be sarcastic if that's the way it is inferred.

However to me, the phrase "kill with kindness" equals "turning the other cheek." Neither of those expressions would be ever used sarcastically by me, so it wouldn't occur to me to take them as sarcasm if someone else wrote them.

 

[CathrynRose]

.

Where the hell have you been?

 

[JerseyJanice]

Where the hell have you been?

In work hell! The demands on workers in this economy are pretty rough.

Hope all is well with you and yours, Cat.

 

[disneynutsss]

I knew what you meant and it's why I apologized to you for taking your remark out of context. I was trying to point out to the OP as well as other newbies that it's best to ignore snarkiness and let the mods handle it if someone really gets out of line.

BTW, Disneynuts, I didn't see anything sarcastic about "killing them with kindness." Anything can be construed as sarcasm, I guess, but I agree that kindness is a very good approach, both in real life and on the internet.

i figured that when you apologized in advance that you were just showing an example.

no worries.

love to kill them with kindness, it usually perplexes people though, especially when they are looking for an argument/fight.