Awww hun.... Reading your PJ made me get all quite tearful so Lord only knows how you are feeling right now! You are marrying your Prince Charming... thats THE only reason you need to be happy. I know its not easy to try and focus on that though when so many other things are happening. I'm a sucker for lists.... I make them for everything.... Make a list with everything you are happy about, and then make a list with everything that is troubling you... and just manipulate your happy list to make it longer! OK, it might not be the complete truth... but it might make you feel happier for a little while!!
Failing that....
... close your curtains/blinds/shutters etc.... Put 'Lust for Life' by Iggy Pop on the stereo on repeat, and dance around your house like a complete idiot until you drop!! Its my 'release' song when I'm having the day from hell... and kinda makes me feel better (probably from exhaustion with all that dancing!!)
Oh.... your dress is beautiful! I love love LOVE my dress, and i've decided I have to stop looking at dresses on here because I keep thinking... Hmmmm..... maybe I should just try one like that!!
Deep breaths, happy thoughts and rant away on here when you feel like things are just getting too much
Christina
xxx
Christina,
Thank you so much. Your Iggy Pop idea is great!! I actually love that song. Now I can't wait until my DF wakes up so that I can dance to it.
I know exactly what you mean about the dresses. I love my dress too, but I also LOVE yours (it's very princessy and sparkly) and many others I've seen!!
LOL...
Happy List
1. Sparkly stuff - I put swarovksi crystals on my invitations and I am so in love with them.
2. DF - Last night, he helped me photoshop the Boardwalk map for our Events insert and then helped me put crystals on everything!!!
3. My dress
4. My mom... I love my mom immensely, but every second I spend my FMIL makes me love my mom that much more.
Sad list 
It's really been bad since the day after our engagement. And I try to concentrate on the details and the Disney wedding. Really my parents are being amazing and they are paying for Disney. So, I am very grateful for that. ( I will add them to the Happy List) But my FIL's (paying for the NJ reception they want) are making everything really hard even for things that they aren't paying for.
My FMIL is refusing to fly to FL, because she doesn't like it when her ears pop. So instead of a 2.5-3 hour flight at about $300 (round trip), they are going to take the train for 24 hours each way and over $1000. I personally don't care that they've made that choice , it's their time and money, but every time she talks to DF, she makes him feel extremely guilty. She keeps implying that it's really such an expensive trip especially since they are paying for a 200 person reception (that we DO NOT want). After talking to her, he contemplates canceling the Disney wedding that I already made the invitations for and my dad already booked 12 non refundable flights and 4 hotel rooms for. About once a week, I have to remind him that it's OUR wedding and her choices are HER choices.
She also vetoed ideas that we had for the Disney wedding. The main one involved honoring our grandparents who have passed (6 out of 8), but she said she doesn't want her mother included and she may leave the room if we do anything for the others, because it would make her too sad. She actually implied that she wouldn't be able to pretend that her mother is still alive and actually at the wedding, if we acknowledge that she is dead. I can't even argue with that, none of her reasons for anything are rational.
I also found out today that EVERY TIME she travels, she packs a suitcase full of cleaning supplies - two types of antibacterial sprays, rubber gloves, scrub brushes, etc- and cleans the hotel room for an hour before anyone is even allowed to sit down.
Almost every aspect of OUR wedding revolves around my FMIL. It just also makes me very worried about the future and how things will be if and when we have children. And although I love DF to death, this is really the first time he has had to stand up to his mother for himself and now his future wife - and even though he is trying, he's really not doing a good job.
He is an only child and his mother is an only child, and he doesn't want to hurt her. I'm scared!!
And then to make matters even worse - VERY off topic, but definitey on my sad list - DF and I wanted Ricky Hatton to beat Mayweather last night. It was the worst thing I've ever seen. They should change the name of the sport to "Ducking".
So needless to say, I'm sad. And I think I give up. My FMIL is going to do whatever she wants. And the person who has the most power to change things (DF) feels powerless against her.
I hope you all don't mind. 
Does DF know how deeply this is bothering you and how it is making you scared for the future?
