The only character meals that are not at Disney resorts are at the Swan/Dolphin (which might as well be Disney resorts, character dinner nightly, breakfast on weekends at Garden Grove) and the Hilton (breakfast only).
You can also go to any Disney resort. You don't have to be staying there and you don't need any sort of admission, but you should think about making a reservation if you choose one, because these meals are VERY popular. Remember that you'll have to leave a credit card guarantee and you have to cancel a day ahead of time to avoid being charged $10 per person. If your thinking is that the off property ones may be less chaotic, then that may be so, because they're not on the dining plan.