pkondz
Brace yourself for immediate disintegration
- Joined
- Mar 9, 2007
- Messages
- 33,429
Canadian Buffoon's DISmeet vacation
The Who, What, Where and When
The drone of tires on concrete
sang counterpoint to the music
bleating from the speakers.
I glanced over at Betty
(my semi-trusty GPS)
and saw that I had
about five more hours
of driving ahead of me.
I settled in with the car
on cruise control.
Nothing like a nice drive
on a nice day.
I slipped behind an SUV and
began to pass a semi-trailer.
And then the SUV began to slow down.
"Oh, come on dude.
If you're going to pass...
don't slow down."
I shook my head in wry amusement.
I was stuck, behind the SUV and
beside the rear tires of the semi.
Out of the corner of my eye
I noticed the semi's left
turn signal start to blink.
I began to divide my attention
between the SUV in front of me,
who still wasn't passing
quickly enough and the semi-trailer
on my right, who may or may not
be deciding to change lanes
and force me off the road.
I quickly checked my rear-view mirror
and the shoulder to my left
to make sure I had some escape options.
The SUV in front of me suddenly swerved
wildly off onto the shoulder.
I had no time to react.
As I smashed into the object
on the road at seventy miles an hour,
the resulting explosion
turned my idyllic drive
into anything but.
But I'm getting ahead of myself...
Well, hi there.
Welcome to my ninth TR...
Ninth!! How did that happen?
Well... it happened because of you.
(Yes. You. It's your fault. Stop whining...
That's my job.)
I started writing TRs almost exactly
twelve years ago to the day.
April 2012, to be precise.
And if there's one thing I'm
always careful of,
it's being precise in my writing.
Everything is absolutely accurate.
Ahem.
(Actually, I do strive for accuracy.
When I'm not... I'll let you know
that I was stretching the truth,
or it will be obvious.
I assure you, however,
the account related above
did happen.)
So why is it your fault?
Because without you, dear reader,
I wouldn't be here.
There's really not much point
in writing if no one reads.
At least, not on a public forum.
And without your comments
I don't know that you've read.
So I want to thank you all.
Thank you for reading along
and thank you for your comments.
In my TRs, I encourage participation.
I love to hear your stories
and anecdotes.
So keep 'em coming.
I'm always up for a good read.
It helps take the edge off the crap
that I put out.
Who am I?
Most of you know me already,
but for those who unfortunately
stumbled upon this little ditty,
(not about Jack and Diane)
allow me to introduce myself.
I'm just a regular ol' fart
from Canada with a slight
fondness for semi-aquatic redheads.
I occasionally travel to the
lands of Disney either by myself
or accompanied by a rugrat.
Recently, that rugrat has been my
(now 17 year old) DD.
Traveling with her is okay,
but she does cramp my style
from time to time.
I've learned to deal with that, though.
In a loving, respectful way.
Look at the way we gaze into
each other's eyes.
Clearly we were meant for each other.
Odd that when the protection
of a third party isn't around,
she seems to like to play hard to get.
She did eventually agree to marry me, though.
You just have to be persistent
(Some would call that stalking.
I prefer.... romantic.)
Plying her with irresistible gifts
didn't hurt either.
Okay... so she didn't agree
to marry me.
But I'm sure she's thinking about it.
Mind you it was a bit awkward
proposing to her with the kid crying
"No, Dad! No!" the whole time.
But I can ignore that.
Besides, she makes for a fine
dining companion.
But sometimes it's nice to do
some adulting and dress up
and enjoy the finer things in life.
See?
Sometimes ya just wanna
dress up and chill.
Ya know?
Of course there's dressing up
and there's dressing up.
I can go both ways, ya know.
Er... uh...
So! Enough about me.
(Please stop cheering.
It's distracting to others.
Also encourages them.)
I think it's maybe time to
buckle down and start writing,
don't you?
Now let's see.... Ah!
I should tell you what it is
that I will be writing about.
Last summer, I did a little road trip
that managed to fit in a DISmeet or two.
Or more.
And in the fall, I managed to once again
make my way home to WDW.
There I managed a few more DISmeets,
as well as at least one or two events.
You'll have to wait for all of that though.
I won't be running a contest
this time around,
but I will be posting at least one
photo per update with a
"did you see it" hidden in it.
No points for finding it,
just for fun.
Look, don't look. It's up to you.
(No. None in this update.
You can stop looking.)
But just for fun,
do you pronounce it
data or data?
And aren't you weirded out
that you actually pronounced it
both ways in your head?
One last thing before
I get this TR started.
What's your favourite
dessert recipe?
Posting recipes will result in....
Well, nothing at all.
I did say there was no contest.
But I might be tempted to send
a little something
to those who submit one.
The Who, What, Where and When
The drone of tires on concrete
sang counterpoint to the music
bleating from the speakers.
I glanced over at Betty
(my semi-trusty GPS)
and saw that I had
about five more hours
of driving ahead of me.
I settled in with the car
on cruise control.
Nothing like a nice drive
on a nice day.
I slipped behind an SUV and
began to pass a semi-trailer.
And then the SUV began to slow down.
"Oh, come on dude.
If you're going to pass...
don't slow down."
I shook my head in wry amusement.
I was stuck, behind the SUV and
beside the rear tires of the semi.
Out of the corner of my eye
I noticed the semi's left
turn signal start to blink.
I began to divide my attention
between the SUV in front of me,
who still wasn't passing
quickly enough and the semi-trailer
on my right, who may or may not
be deciding to change lanes
and force me off the road.
I quickly checked my rear-view mirror
and the shoulder to my left
to make sure I had some escape options.
The SUV in front of me suddenly swerved
wildly off onto the shoulder.
I had no time to react.
As I smashed into the object
on the road at seventy miles an hour,
the resulting explosion
turned my idyllic drive
into anything but.
But I'm getting ahead of myself...
Well, hi there.
Welcome to my ninth TR...
Ninth!! How did that happen?
Well... it happened because of you.
(Yes. You. It's your fault. Stop whining...
That's my job.)
I started writing TRs almost exactly
twelve years ago to the day.
April 2012, to be precise.
And if there's one thing I'm
always careful of,
it's being precise in my writing.
Everything is absolutely accurate.
Ahem.
(Actually, I do strive for accuracy.
When I'm not... I'll let you know
that I was stretching the truth,
or it will be obvious.
I assure you, however,
the account related above
did happen.)
So why is it your fault?
Because without you, dear reader,
I wouldn't be here.
There's really not much point
in writing if no one reads.
At least, not on a public forum.
And without your comments
I don't know that you've read.
So I want to thank you all.
Thank you for reading along
and thank you for your comments.
In my TRs, I encourage participation.
I love to hear your stories
and anecdotes.
So keep 'em coming.
I'm always up for a good read.
It helps take the edge off the crap
that I put out.
Who am I?
Most of you know me already,
but for those who unfortunately
stumbled upon this little ditty,
(not about Jack and Diane)
allow me to introduce myself.
I'm just a regular ol' fart
from Canada with a slight
fondness for semi-aquatic redheads.
I occasionally travel to the
lands of Disney either by myself
or accompanied by a rugrat.
Recently, that rugrat has been my
(now 17 year old) DD.
Traveling with her is okay,
but she does cramp my style
from time to time.
I've learned to deal with that, though.
In a loving, respectful way.
Look at the way we gaze into
each other's eyes.
Clearly we were meant for each other.
Odd that when the protection
of a third party isn't around,
she seems to like to play hard to get.
She did eventually agree to marry me, though.
You just have to be persistent
(Some would call that stalking.
I prefer.... romantic.)
Plying her with irresistible gifts
didn't hurt either.
Okay... so she didn't agree
to marry me.
But I'm sure she's thinking about it.
Mind you it was a bit awkward
proposing to her with the kid crying
"No, Dad! No!" the whole time.
But I can ignore that.
Besides, she makes for a fine
dining companion.
But sometimes it's nice to do
some adulting and dress up
and enjoy the finer things in life.
See?
Sometimes ya just wanna
dress up and chill.
Ya know?
Of course there's dressing up
and there's dressing up.
I can go both ways, ya know.
Er... uh...
So! Enough about me.
(Please stop cheering.
It's distracting to others.
Also encourages them.)
I think it's maybe time to
buckle down and start writing,
don't you?
Now let's see.... Ah!
I should tell you what it is
that I will be writing about.
Last summer, I did a little road trip
that managed to fit in a DISmeet or two.
Or more.
And in the fall, I managed to once again
make my way home to WDW.
There I managed a few more DISmeets,
as well as at least one or two events.
You'll have to wait for all of that though.
I won't be running a contest
this time around,
but I will be posting at least one
photo per update with a
"did you see it" hidden in it.
No points for finding it,
just for fun.
Look, don't look. It's up to you.
(No. None in this update.
You can stop looking.)
But just for fun,
do you pronounce it
data or data?
And aren't you weirded out
that you actually pronounced it
both ways in your head?
One last thing before
I get this TR started.
What's your favourite
dessert recipe?
Posting recipes will result in....
Well, nothing at all.
I did say there was no contest.
But I might be tempted to send
a little something
to those who submit one.
Last edited:
to the TR!
