Can I vent here please?

[NMAmy]

For those who could not do a studio with teenagers, would you turn down a FREE studio, or would you accept the offer, and make do?

She has every right to thank me for the room, but decline the offer if it is unacceptable. But, she has not done that.

I think it is harder to share a space like a studio when the kids are different sexes. Although, even when dd takes a friend, sharing the bathroom and all available mirrors with two teenage girls is pretty challenging. Luckily, I'm an early riser and don't require a lot of maintenance. Last time, at one point, I told them, "You're 15. You are never going to look this good again in your life. Put your hair in a pony tail and let's GO!!"

I do understand your frustration--you're trying to do a nice thing and unfortunately, it doesn't seem to be acceptable to your sister. She should really look at getting the kids their own room with her own funds, if that's what she wants to do.

 

[mickeyfan2]

Pick me!!! I will be happy to stay in the studio and will not ask any questions I promise.

 

[noodleknitter]

"You're 15. You are never going to look this good again in your life. Put your hair in a pony tail and let's GO!!"

OMGosh! That is an all-time perfect "line!" (Which I will steal the very next time it is applicable!)

OP-I'm glad that you won't let the crazies get to you once you are on the trip. I know you didn't ask for advice, but I am going to say, "let it go" tell her that she is welcome to book an additional room, and explain to her how she needs to do it.

 

[Tigger&Belle]

Personally, being in a studio with a family of 5 wouldn't bother me in the least, but that's me and all 6 of us have stayed at the Polynesian when my youngest was 1yo and survived just fine (my other kids were 7, 10, and 13yo). But that's me and when I'm there and not spending much time in the room that sort of thing doesn't bother me.

One summer we were guests of my sister at a timeshare--our family of 6 joined her and her DH at a 2BR place. That I will never do again and I don't care if it's free. The space was fine, but the noise level drove my sister and BIL crazy and I will never share someone elses space who doesn't have an understanding of normal noise levels for children, especially when they seem to have forgotten what noisy hellions their kids were when they were growing up. But that's a different matter. I knew that going into it and never should have gone.

I hope everything works out in your case. I'm not really sure why it would have mattered if they had of upgraded at their expense if it had of made their trip more pleasant to them. Yeah, it would have been a pain to you if everyone had of wanted to do it, but hopefully that wouldn't have been the case.

 

[Disney1fan2002]

I'm not really sure why it would have mattered if they had of upgraded at their expense if it had of made their trip more pleasant to them. Yeah, it would have been a pain to you if everyone had of wanted to do it, but hopefully that wouldn't have been the case.

I don't have a problem with her upgrading. She can call CRO and pay for another studio. I am not going to upgrade her through member services.

I have a number of siblings that have older teens, if they see that I've helped my sister upgrade, they will want an upgrade. They can all upgrade on their own. I am offering a free studio. My contribution to their vacation ends there.

 

[Wishing on a star]

I hate 'gifts' that come with strings......

We decided that NEVER again would we ever travel with my inlaws, because it was 'their way' or the highway.

What might be OKAY and acceptable to one person/family might simply not work out well for another.

If it were me, my invitation would have included the phone number for each family to call if they wanted to make any changes or updates to their accomodations. I don't see where your sister is asking you to pay for the upgrade???

I guess I don't see the problem.

 

[Christine]

I don't have a problem with her upgrading. She can call CRO and pay for another studio. I am not going to upgrade her through member services.

I have a number of siblings that have older teens, if they see that I've helped my sister upgrade, they will want an upgrade. They can all upgrade on their own. I am offering a free studio. My contribution to their vacation ends there.

You say that you don't have a problem with her upgrading, yet in your OP you say this:

She doesn't think her family of 5 will be comfortable in a studio. Her family of 5 is her, her DH, her 15yo DS and 12yo DD and 2 yo DS.(the age they will be at the time) I reply, stating there was no way to upgrade with cash. So I lied[/B].( I know there is, but I am not getting involved in that) ... if she upgrades, then someone else will upgrade, and then it will be a big mess, that I don't want.

She called you to ask if there was any way to upgrade using cash. To me, that means that she wants to upgrade at her own expense. Or she wants you to help her upgrade by getting in touch with the "right" people to do so. I don't see what is wrong with this. Different strokes, you know? She's not thumbing her nose at your gift. She's just not comfortable in a room with her two teens and baby. It just seems to me that you are really being a bit controlling over this vacation. Or maybe inflexible is the right word?? I don't know. I can see if she told you that your room wasn't good enough and then wanted you to pay for something better. But, according to your post, she asked for a way to upgrade using her own funds.

 

[Breezy_Carol]

I guess we are the weird ones. I don't see a problem with staying in a studio with opposite sex teens. We stayed in All Stars when DD was a senior in high school (17) and DS was a sophomore (15). It worked out fine. A studio would have been a luxury. If someone offered it to be, I would take it without complaint.

I think SIL should either take it and say thank you or turn it down and say thank you but that won't work for us. To keep asking for upgrades is tacky and rude.

 

[Disney1fan2002]

I hate 'gifts' that come with strings......

We decided that NEVER again would we ever travel with my inlaws, because it was 'their way' or the highway.

What might be OKAY and acceptable to one person/family might simply not work out well for another.

If it were me, my invitation would have included the phone number for each family to call if they wanted to make any changes or updates to their accomodations. I don't see where your sister is asking you to pay for the upgrade???

I guess I don't see the problem.

What strings? She is free to call and pay for an extra room. I am not getting involved with upgrading through member services.

Sorry, I didn't think to include the phone number for anyone to make changes. I thought since everyone knew what they were getting before they accepted the offer, they would be happy with it. Silly me.

 

[Wishing on a star]

She called you to ask if there was any way to upgrade using cash. To me, that means that she wants to upgrade at her own expense. Or she wants you to help her upgrade by getting in touch with the "right" people to do so. I don't see what is wrong with this. ... It just seems to me that you are really being a bit controlling over this vacation.

 

[Christine]

I guess we are the weird ones. I don't see a problem with staying in a studio with opposite sex teens.

I don't think you are weird, nor do I think wanting a bigger room is weird. People are different. I know after *vacationing* with my DD (14), her friend (14), and DS (11), I couldn't WAIT to get out of my room in the morning. OMG, what a freakin' chore that was. The teens wanted to stay up late and watch TV all night, while DS and I were beat. I hated falling asleep with the TV on for hours, or them trying to come back from the pool at 11:00 at night. Then in the morning, everyone was trying to get their hair brushed, some of us were trying to get showers, etc. We did it, of course, and had a fine vacation, but it wasn't as relaxing of a time as I could have had if the kids had had their own room. I can only imagine how it might have been if I had been trying to get a 2 year old to get enough sleep and then having my teens in the room. If you can do it, great--if it hinders your enjoyment of your vacation--not so great.

I don't think that any particular way is the "right way." But, I might be looking for a way, myself, to get two rooms (at my own expense).

 

[Wishing on a star]

What strings? She is free to call and pay for an extra room. I am not getting involved with upgrading through member services.

Sorry, I didn't think to include the phone number for anyone to make changes. I thought since everyone knew what they were getting before they accepted the offer, they would be happy with it. Silly me.

From your original post....
"My sister e-mailed me back asking if there was anyway she could pay for an upgrade after using points for a studio. I reply, stating there was no way to upgrade with cash. So I lied. ...."

 

[Independent]

She asked me that if someone did cancel, rather than lose the points, like I would, could I just book a room for her two older kids?

OMG! I saw red. I kept my calm, and just told her no. I had decided that if anyone cancels, I will use the points to extend my stay. I again reminded her that an OKW studio is plenty big enough for her family. Want to know what she said? "Well, we don't like being together that much."

WTH???????? My other sister and I decided that it is all because she wants to be able to get it on with her husband. Well, you know what, I DON'T CARE. I am GIVING her a freaking FREE room. I am sorry if her FREE room is unacceptable to her.

I'm confused. Did your sister want to get another room herself and put the kids in the studio. And this is not acceptable to you for her to reserve an additional room on top of the studio?

From the way I read this, it sounds like the offer is only good if all 5 people stay in the room?

The offer is extremely generous, however, if you are dictating that the parents can only have the offer if they ALL stay in the room and cannot get an additional room at their own expense, then I do think you may be putting a few strings on the gift.

Family vacations can be very, very difficult.

 

[Disney1fan2002]

I'm confused. Did your sister want to get another room herself and put the kids in the studio. And this is not acceptable to you for her to reserve an additional room on top of the studio?

From the way I read this, it sounds like the offer is only good if all 5 people stay in the room?

The offer is extremely generous, however, if you are dictating that the parents can only have the offer if they ALL stay in the room and cannot get an additional room at their own expense, then I do think you may be putting a few strings on the gift.

Family vacations can be very, very difficult.

My sister 1st asked me if I could upgrade to a bigger room with cash, after using points for the studio. She would pay, but I would be making the changes. I did not want to get involved with that. You all don't know my family. This will, for certain, turn into a big headache. So, I told her I can't do that through DVC. She is free to call CRO on her own. I gave her the number.

She THEN asked if anyone cancels after I booked their rooms, if she could HAVE the room for her two older kids. THAT is what is out of line IMO.

 

[budbeerlady]

I think what you are doing is very generious! I would jump at the chance to have a "free" room at WDW, even if I had to sleep with my sister and parents in one room. However, the sister has two choices that she could have made. Take the room, say thanks and get on with life. Or book her own room herself paying cash. You offered a studio, if that isnt to her liking its up to her to change it.

 

[Independent]

My sister 1st asked me if I could upgrade to a bigger room with cash, after using points for the studio. She would pay, but I would be making the changes. I did not want to get involved with that. You all don't know my family. This will, for certain, turn into a big headache. So, I told her I can't do that through DVC. She is free to call CRO on her own. I gave her the number.

She THEN asked if anyone cancels after I booked their rooms, if she could HAVE the room for her two older kids. THAT is what is out of line IMO.

Thanks for clarifying. Your post could be misread that your sister wanted the room for the kids and wanted to get an additional room on their own. And that was what was unacceptable.

Good luck. I don't envy you trying to put this together.

 

[Christine]

She THEN asked if anyone cancels after I booked their rooms, if she could HAVE the room for her two older kids. THAT is what is out of line IMO.

Yes, I agree that THIS part is out of line. But, honestly, can't you see that you might have "drove" her to it. You admittedly are lying to her about upgrading the room. I realize you don't want to get involved in it, and I can even see you getting "miffed" that your gift "wasn't enough" for her. But she's not out of line either so I can't help wondering why you can't just compromise with her rather than wanting to control this aspect of it. I would ask for a way to get an additional room too--and believe me, getting it on with my DH would be the farthest thing from my mind. Besides, it sounds like she will have the 2 year old in the room with her. Sounds to me like she just wants to ensure that she (and the baby) can get some sleep while the teens will probably stay up all night.

 

[Disney1fan2002]

I think what you are doing is very generious! I would jump at the chance to have a "free" room at WDW, even if I had to sleep with my sister and parents in one room. However, the sister has two choices that she could have made. Take the room, say thanks and get on with life. Or book her own room herself paying cash. You offered a studio, if that isnt to her liking its up to her to change it.

Thank you! She is free to change it, on her own.

If i am considered controlling because I won't get involved with her upgrading, because it could mean i have to upgrade 6 other people, then I admit it, I am the most controlling person you wanted to meet.

I should just understand where my sister is coming from, and not consider her an ingrate.

 

[Disney1fan2002]

I think i should mention, for the record, that my sister and her DH have a boat. Not a very big boat, but a boat that has a cabin. They have overnights on the boat.

She does not think an OKW studio studio will not be big enough for her family, yet they can sleep on a boat.

Believe me, some of you say you can understand my sister, but really, you can't. She is truly a person unlike the rest of us. (in my family)

 

[Toby'sFriend]

actually I can understand your sister. I get plenty of "7 people crammed into the Holiday Inn was plenty good enough for you when you were a kid" lectures myself concerning vacations.

All I can say is

My preschooler goes to sleep at around 7:30pm
My two teenagers go to sleep at around 11:30pm

My husband and I have been married for nearly 20 years and yes, we do often still like "our privacy" on vacation. I don't feel guilty about that.

I have no problem with you saying "I've offerred a studio, that's it." but you yourself admitted that you lied to her and you seem to be making alot of judgements on "what's good enough for her."

So, now you get the stress of knowing that her family is not happy and you could have done something to avert that.

Your choice. Enjoy your vacation.