Bringing along child's friend

[Sandi]

DD12 is an only child. She is a terrific traveler and has gone on many trips to WDW with just me or with me and DH. A few times, we've met up with my siblings and their children, but the cousins are a lot younger than DD12.

We just returned from a WDW trip and on the plane we talked about her bringing along a friend on a future trip. We've brought different friends along on summer trips where we drive, so we know the other children and are confident we could "all get along" for a week's trip.

My questions, however, revolve around what age is appropriate and how you figure out costs. We would, of course, discuss with the other child's parents before extending an invitation (wouldn't want any unnecessary disappointment if the parents weren't comfortable). Covering the hotel and food costs is something I'd definitely do, as that's what we would do for any sort of trip. What about airfare and themepark tickets? What has been your experience. Do you just cover the extra person's costs because they are your guest, or do you do something different? Anything else we should be considering?

Thanks for any help.

 

[almburr]

I think if you are inviting them to go along with your daughter then you pay for airfare, hotel ,and tickets and bigger meals. The friend should bring plenty of $$ for extra stuff she wants.

that is the way I feel about it.

 

[mericletwins]

DD12 is an only child. She is a terrific traveler and has gone on many trips to WDW with just me or with me and DH. A few times, we've met up with my siblings and their children, but the cousins are a lot younger than DD12.

We just returned from a WDW trip and on the plane we talked about her bringing along a friend on a future trip. We've brought different friends along on summer trips where we drive, so we know the other children and are confident we could "all get along" for a week's trip.

My questions, however, revolve around what age is appropriate and how you figure out costs. We would, of course, discuss with the other child's parents before extending an invitation (wouldn't want any unnecessary disappointment if the parents weren't comfortable). Covering the hotel and food costs is something I'd definitely do, as that's what we would do for any sort of trip. What about airfare and themepark tickets? What has been your experience. Do you just cover the extra person's costs because they are your guest, or do you do something different? Anything else we should be considering?

Thanks for any help.

When I was 10, I went with my friend on a two week trip to Greece and Turkey. One week was a land tour, one week a cruise. She was an only child. My family paid for airfare and spending money for me, her family paid for the rest. The next year they went to Egypt and again invited me along, but this time my parents would have had to pay for the whole trip, which wasn't really feasible for them.

I would say that the age for asking a friend is appropriate and I would offer to pay for whatever you feel comfortable/are able to pay for. I think I would definitely do hotel/tickets and then probably do food. Have family do airfare and spending money? Maybe food also, or money towards food. Easy to figure out if you are doing the dining plan.

 

[Davidsmommy]

When I was young, it was always if we invited someone we covered everything (except extra spending money). And, when I went on trips with my friends, it was the same.

Now, we never took friends on trips where we needed airfare - we always took friends on road trips to the Jersey shore, etc. so it wasn't really that much more expensive - just food/entertainment.

I think for us, I would feel comfortable asking only if I was willing to cover all the costs. But, because a trip to Disney can be so expensive, I am not sure I would be able to do that. So, I am no help.

 

[amylevan]

The summer after my freshman year in high school (what is that 14/15?) I went with my best friend and her dad & sister to Florida/Disney/Tampa for 2 weeks. They had a timeshare, so my family did not chip in for lodging.

My parents did buy my plane ticket and they gave me money with instructions to buy snacks & souvenirs and such. My friend's dad paid for my meals but I bought any snacks I wanted. (I would have felt weird asking him for popcorn, ya know?)

I bought my own park tickets for the non-Disney places we went: Sea World, Universal and Busch Gardens. Her dad had bought our Disney tickets before we went though, and he paid for those.

 

[daisyduck123]

I have a DD12 & we might tell her she can bring a friend to WDW next summer (2008).

We will offer to pay for food & the resort room (we're in DVC so we use points) but the park ticket (we usually go for 7-9 days) and spending money the parents will have to pay for. I won't feel bad about that at all. If the parents can't/don't want to pay for that, then DD will ask a different friend.

**We always drive, so plane tickets aren't an issue for us.

 

[Darcy03231]

When DD was 13 we invited her friend on a cruise with us. Her parents provided her with spending money and I paid the rest. They did offer to help out with the other expenses (airfare, cruise, excursions, tips, etc), but I felt as we invited her we should pay. I would feel funny inviting someone and then asking them to pay.

 

[DeeDeeDis]

One or more of our boys usually brings a friend when we go on vacation. so We pay for food and lodging. If we fly they pay for airfare & park tickets and of course their own spending money. If we decide to go to either MVMCP or a waterpark or disney quest I pick up the cost of that ticket.

When my boys are invited on vacation with friends I pay for their expenses. I thing its terrific that they get the opportunately to experience some new and exciting place with other people and I dont feel the family they are going with should have to cover my childs cost. Hey paying for one is always cheaper than paying for five of us so I will glady pay anytime.

 

[Princess Roo]

I used to go on ski trips with a friend when I was in high school, staying in their timeshare a few hours' drive away. The friend's parents covered everything except ski rentals and tickets and then my parents would also buy them a "thank you" restaurant gift card. (Sort of their way of chipping in towards food.)

I think there is a wide range of what is acceptable. I think almost everyone would agree that you should cover lodging and that the child's family should cover her souvenir money. If I were you, I would cover her food and any incidental entertainment costs that come up along the way (a movie that you all go to, for example) and then ask the family to cover tickets and airfare, but I think that either way would be OK.

 

[blessedby3]

We have been taking our oldest DD's best friend with us on vacations since they were 10. It works out great for us. She is like another daughter. We always pay for everything if it is a beach type trip, but for Disney she pays for her park tickets and part of her food. Disney is too expensive to pay for everything for another child. We bought her airfare, most of her meals, and hotels for our last Disney trip with a friend (2005) and would do it the same way again.

 

[prplcrzy]

We are taking DDs friend with us this year for a 10-day trip. Her parents are paying for her airfare and hopper pass, we are taking care of everything else.

I agree with pp that Disney is so expensive that you may not be able to pick up the tab as you would if you were vacationing somewhere else. Also, the length of the trip may be a deciding factor as well.

We just talked to her parents and told them what things would cost and they agreed. I don't think asking them to pay $500 for their daughter to enjoy Disney for 10 days is alot to ask. Just think of the money they would have to spend if they took her.

Enjoy your trip!

Nancy

 

[DaisyD]

I think if you are inviting them to go along with your daughter then you pay for airfare, hotel ,and tickets and bigger meals. The friend should bring plenty of $$ for extra stuff she wants.

that is the way I feel about it.

ITA. If you invite someone then they are your guests. They shouldn't be asked to pay anything at all except $$ for souveniers.

 

[Mickey'snewestfan]

I have an only so I've thought about it down the road. Knowing DS's friends parents I imagine that it would go like this:

I invite and don't mention costs

They say yes, and ask how much.

I say "No, no, he's our guest"

They say "I insist, I won't let him go without contributing"

They end up paying airfare, and possibly some of themepark tickets. They send spending money, but I end up getting both boys souvenirs and returning the money unused.

In other words I'd be prepared to pay 100% but doubt I'd end up doing so. There is one exception which is a close friend from a low income family. In that case I'd insist on paying 100% and would make that very clear. I'd present it like they were doing me a favor sending their son to entertain mine.

 

[Sandi]

I have an only so I've thought about it down the road. Knowing DS's friends parents I imagine that it would go like this:

I invite and don't mention costs

They say yes, and ask how much.

I say "No, no, he's our guest"

They say "I insist, I won't let him go without contributing"

They end up paying airfare, and possibly some of themepark tickets. They send spending money, but I end up getting both boys souvenirs and returning the money unused.

In other words I'd be prepared to pay 100% but doubt I'd end up doing so. There is one exception which is a close friend from a low income family. In that case I'd insist on paying 100% and would make that very clear. I'd present it like they were doing me a favor sending their son to entertain mine.

Actually, this is kind of what I expect will happen. Thanks for taking the time to spell it out. Thanks, also, to everyone else for their input. It's helpful.

 

[DaisyD]

I have an only so I've thought about it down the road. Knowing DS's friends parents I imagine that it would go like this:

I invite and don't mention costs

They say yes, and ask how much.

I say "No, no, he's our guest"

They say "I insist, I won't let him go without contributing"

They end up paying airfare, and possibly some of themepark tickets. They send spending money, but I end up getting both boys souvenirs and returning the money unused.

In other words I'd be prepared to pay 100% but doubt I'd end up doing so. There is one exception which is a close friend from a low income family. In that case I'd insist on paying 100% and would make that very clear. I'd present it like they were doing me a favor sending their son to entertain mine.

Well I would still refuse to accept any money. I would say, "Of course we don't want any money. He is our GUEST and therefore we will pay for everything. If he would like some extra souveniers to bring home then you can give him some fun money for that but we are taking care of the rest."

I think the parents of the invited child would offer out of courtesy but wouldn't think you would take them up on it. Frankly I would be shocked if someone invited my child somewhere, I offered to pay, and was taken up on that offer. I would fully expect my child to be paid for as I would do the same.

 

[2Pirates_1Princess]

I have an only so I've thought about it down the road. Knowing DS's friends parents I imagine that it would go like this:

I invite and don't mention costs

They say yes, and ask how much.

I say "No, no, he's our guest"

They say "I insist, I won't let him go without contributing"

They end up paying airfare, and possibly some of themepark tickets. They send spending money, but I end up getting both boys souvenirs and returning the money unused.

In other words I'd be prepared to pay 100% but doubt I'd end up doing so. There is one exception which is a close friend from a low income family. In that case I'd insist on paying 100% and would make that very clear. I'd present it like they were doing me a favor sending their son to entertain mine.

I like this idea. You never know what someone elses situation is. I think you should be prepared to pay 100% and happy with whatever the family offers to cover. At the very least I think they would offer to cover air fare or the theme park tickets. If my son where invited I would want to cover one or both of those things. I also think that it depends on how well you know the parents of the child invited. We have some close friends and I wouldn't have a problem telling them what I would like or expected, but if I didn't know the family that well it would be harder.