Breastfeeding an adopted baby

[princesspumpkin]

I just had my first encounter with a patient who is doing this. I saw it once on one of the baby shows on television, but this is my first experience with it personally. Any thoughts?

 

[BuzznBelle'smom]

Personally, I don't think I'd bother--it takes a lot of work and dedication, and formula is a perfectly good alternative. However, I'd never discourage someone with the desire to try it.

 

[transparant]

As a Certified Lactation Consultant for 13 years - I have seen this done successfully a few times. It is a lot of hard work and dedication - but it can be done. Most of the time it can not be done exclusively though - supplementation is needed. Also - lacation is acheived easier if the adotive mother has been pregnant before either with a full term pregnancy, or miscarriage.

 

[lemondog]

I thought about it when we adopted our oldest DD. I even bought a book on how to do it. In the end I decided it was just going to be too much work. For one thing, I don't make milk very well anyway, as I learned when I gave birth to my twins (after 1 month of breastfeeding I was still only making enough for one baby), and secondly, my DD was already 6 months old and trying to get her to latch to the breast after 6 months of a fast-flowing bottle (which is what they use in Russia) is downright impossible. Plus I was working FT and just didn't have the time to work with her on it.

I think it's great if the baby is a newborn and the mom can get a good milk supply established. I always think breastmilk is best. But I certainly would not expect adoptive mothers to go out of their way to make an attempt. Breastfeeding biological babies is hard enough -- breastfeeding adopted babies has got to be about 100 times harder! And formula is so good nowadays, I think it's a perfectly acceptable form of nutrition.

 

[Jenn Lynn]

I think it's great if they can do it.

 

[justhat]

When my daughter was born my milk took long to come in and Madison lost a lot of weight so we had to supplement. I had been using a bottle at first but then the LC I went to gave me this supplemental nursing system, where you put the formula in a little plastic bottle and hang it around your neck, then it goes through these very tiny tubes that you tape to your breasts so that when they baby sucks she gets breastmilk and formula through the tube. She told me she used them with some adoptive moms since it encourages breastfeeding over using a bottle but also gives the supplementation. Well I got that thing on a Monday afternoon and luckily for me my milk was in in full force on Wednesday cause I don't think I could have done another day with that SNS. It was very challenging and I really give a lot of credit to moms who have to use them long-term, like I imagine many adoptive moms have to. Of course, I got double mastitis the day my milk came in and then I just pumped and fed her in bottles anyway so I guess I sorta wasted my time with the SNS since I went back to bottles 2 days later. It worked out fine for us though thank gosh and she ended up nursing until she was 21.5 months with no more bottles after she was about 3 weeks old (her choice more than mine).

 

[TheOtherVillainess]

What a cracked idea. But hey,if they want to go through all that trouble, go for it!

TOV

 

[transparant]

What a cracked idea. But hey,if they want to go through all that trouble, go for it!

TOV

Why is it a cracked idea? Some women really want that bonding even if the milk production isn't 100%. I think its a very unselfish thing to want.

 

[TheOtherVillainess]

Because I think going to all that trouble to breastfeed is totally cracked. BUT I won't stand in the way of anybody who wants to go ahead and go for it.

TOV

 

[roliepolieoliefan]

I have to agree. Its alot of work when formula is a perfectly good alternative. I think its alot of pressure with Breast is Best. Sometimes it makes a woman feel like less of a mother if she doesn't breastfeed. I think some of it has gotten out of hand. If you can do it OK. But I think some woman feel, they must, or the baby won't be healthy or people will look down on them. And thats totally untrue.

When I worked OB, there were mothers actually crying saying they didn't want to BF but the other nurses and LC said it was best, so they felt they had to. OK yea it is, but its not for everyone.

 

[CookieGVB]

I breastfed my son for 6 weeks, but I never had that "close, bonding" experience. He fed for about 10 minutes, and would fall asleep, to wake up in an hour, starving and crying again. Truth be told, and I know I'm going to take some heat for this, but it was the most miserable 6 weeks I've ever spent. I know it was best for him, but I don't think I'd ever do it again. I can't even imagine the work it would be for an adoptive mother.

But, more power to her for wanting to try - I hope it works out.

 

[SunFloridaDisney]

I think it's great if they can do it. I have a friend who did that and I really admire the dedication.

I know how hard it was for me with my first DD to get the hand of BF, but it worked out over time. I BF'd all 4 of my kids and wouldn't change it. But that was my preference. Not everyone thinks the same.

But more power to her!

 

[Keli]

I think it's great if the adoptive mom can make it work. Personally I don't think I'd even want to attempt something like that but I can understand why someone would want to. You want the full parenting experience when you adopt a baby and for some moms that needs to include the option of breastfeeding. Of course breastfeeding isn't important for lots of adoptive moms just like it's not important to lots of bio moms. But I understand the desire for some adoptive moms to do it.

 

[poohandwendy]

I breastfed all three of my children, and loved it. But I would not even consider that if I adopted. I think people really overemphasize the bonding experience with breastfeeding. There is no reason that a woman cannot bond just as closely with her adopted child as breastfeeding mothers do with their biological children without actually breastfeeding.

It was not that long ago that very few children in this country were breastfed, did our mothers not bond with us? I agree with RPOF, the Breast is Best campaign has done alot of good, but it also has caused some people to really believe they will have less of a bond if they do not breastfeed and that is just untrue.

I think breastfeeding is a wonderful thing, but it is just not practical in some cases. Women should be encouraged, above all else, to do what feels right for them and their children (adopted or biological). And they should also be reassured that bonding with their child is not dependent on mammary glands.

 

[momof2inPA]

Wow, that's dedication. I guess if you have the time and the desire, what's the harm? To each her own.

 

[poohandwendy]

LOL, I hit send too soon. The reason I wouldn't consider it is because I think there would be enough stress adjusting to a new adopted child, I wouldn't want to add something that has the odds of success stacked against me. I just think I would feel like I failed if my efforts were fruitless.

I can understand why some people decide to give it a shot because sometimes it works, all the power to them. Just not something I would do.

 

[SchultzFamily]

I had never heard of breastfeeding an adopted baby when we adopted our son but did hear about it after. When we were adopting our 2nd child I did a lot of research on it and decided to go for it using a supplemental system. I did this for a week, and yes it was a lot of work, but I felt totally worth it. Then we got the call all adoptive parents fear. The birthmother had changed her mind and was coming to get the baby. So all I put into learning about it and doing it for a week was suddenly for nothing.
2 years later when I was finally able to get pregnant I did breast feed my daughter but was never able to produce enough milk so guess what, there I was using that supplemental system again. After 3 months of that I finally gave up and switched to formula, the supplemental system and pumping to stimulate milk production just weren't working. Of course giving up coincided with my going back to work.
If I was going to do it all over with an adopted baby I don't know if I would. Especially after my experience with breastfeeding after giving birth. Would I encourage another adoptive mom who wanted to breastfeed - absolutely!
Vickie

 

[momof2inPA]

LOL, I hit send too soon. The reason I wouldn't consider it is because I think there would be enough stress adjusting to a new adopted child, I wouldn't want to add something that has the odds of success stacked against me. I just think I would feel like I failed if my efforts were fruitless.

I can understand why some people decide to give it a shot because sometimes it works, all the power to them. Just not something I would do.

Maybe the person doesn't measure success in whether or not she can provide all the nutrition the baby needs, but some of it or just the comfort of nursing. If someone has always wanted to nurse their babies, seen their friends and sisters do so, and can't have children, it's nice she can still nurse if she wants to. Nursing a baby is a beautiful thing, IMO, and I wouldn't have missed it for the world.

 

[momof2inPA]

I had never heard of breastfeeding an adopted baby when we adopted our son but did hear about it after. When we were adopting our 2nd child I did a lot of research on it and decided to go for it using a supplemental system. I did this for a week, and yes it was a lot of work, but I felt totally worth it. Then we got the call all adoptive parents fear. The birthmother had changed her mind and was coming to get the baby. So all I put into learning about it and doing it for a week was suddenly for nothing.
2 years later when I was finally able to get pregnant I did breast feed my daughter but was never able to produce enough milk so guess what, there I was using that supplemental system again. After 3 months of that I finally gave up and switched to formula, the supplemental system and pumping to stimulate milk production just weren't working. Of course giving up coincided with my going back to work.
If I was going to do it all over with an adopted baby I don't know if I would. Especially after my experience with breastfeeding after giving birth. Would I encourage another adoptive mom who wanted to breastfeed - absolutely!
Vickie

Great post. It continually amazes me how vast the experiences can be of DIS posters.

 

[ZachnElli]

I think it's great if an adoptive mother wants to give it a try! I know I didn't and I'm an adoptive mommy. What led us to adoption was 5 miscarriages and my hormones were a mess. I didn't want to take more hormones to produce milk, which you have to do in pill form. I was already hormonally messed up and I didn't want to make it worse, that wouldn't have been good for me or anyone around me! Noah was 6 days old when we got him and I had to make a late night trip to Babies R Us the night we got him because I didn't have the same nipples as his foster mommy had. I don't think he would have latched on anyway.