Best Advice for First Time Fathers

[dejr_8]

I saw this on TMZ last night. Some actor gave this advice.

Offer to change as many diapers as possible before the baby starts eating adult type food. Changing "baby poop" diapers is easy. Changing diapers with "adult poop" not fun.

 

[Robinrs]

Like I tell my kid, if you say you WON'T do it, it means I HAVE to do it. Not happenin...

 

[barkley]

I saw this on TMZ last night. Some actor gave this advice.

Offer to change as many diapers as possible before the baby starts eating adult type food. Changing "baby poop" diapers is easy. Changing diapers with "adult poop" not fun.

don't 'offer'-JUST DO IT!

i will never understand the concept of some fathers who feel they need to 'offer' in caring for their own children

to 'offer' means to present for acceptance or rejection-LETS GET REAL PEOPLE, if the child has a dirty diaper, needs to be bathed, needs to be fed, needs soothing or supervision it's not something that has the option of rejection. it needs to be done, someone has to do it-and that 'someone' does'nt always have to be the mom.


(off my soapbox now, but i used to get ticked off royaly when the elder females in our lives lavished praise on dh just because he happened to change one diaper when they were around, ignoring the fact that i'de already changed a dozen that day).

 

[dejr_8]

don't 'offer'-JUST DO IT!

i will never understand the concept of some fathers who feel they need to 'offer' in caring for their own children

to 'offer' means to present for acceptance or rejection-LETS GET REAL PEOPLE, if the child has a dirty diaper, needs to be bathed, needs to be fed, needs soothing or supervision it's not something that has the option of rejection. it needs to be done, someone has to do it-and that 'someone' does'nt always have to be the mom.


(off my soapbox now, but i used to get ticked off royaly when the elder females in our lives lavished praise on dh just because he happened to change one diaper when they were around, ignoring the fact that i'de already changed a dozen that day).

This was meant to be HUMOROUS...

 

[KiKi Mouse]

Little things DH did for me when I was home all day with a week old newborn when he went back to work:

He would make me lunch/snacks and have them ready to go in the fridge so I could just grab it.

On his way home he would call to see if we needed anything.

He did things because they needed to be done.

When he came home from work he would make supper or help out with baby etc.

This is my second husband. I chose well

 

[SAHDad]

don't 'offer'-JUST DO IT!

i will never understand the concept of some fathers who feel they need to 'offer' in caring for their own children

to 'offer' means to present for acceptance or rejection-LETS GET REAL PEOPLE, if the child has a dirty diaper, needs to be bathed, needs to be fed, needs soothing or supervision it's not something that has the option of rejection. it needs to be done, someone has to do it-and that 'someone' does'nt always have to be the mom.


(off my soapbox now, but i used to get ticked off royaly when the elder females in our lives lavished praise on dh just because he happened to change one diaper when they were around, ignoring the fact that i'de already changed a dozen that day).

And, on the flip side - ladies, when a guy is taking care of a child: unless he is doing something which clearly constitutes a threat to the child's safety or well-being, back the ($*%$(*&% off!!!!

Sorry, but there is a huge presumption (on the part of both men and women) that a mother's care is always superior to a father's care. The styles are different, in general, but so what? It's not the end of the world if my daughter's hair isn't perfectly braided or her outfit does not match.

Heck, for all you know, she was in a perfectly matched outfit before she had a blowout in her diaper, and her hair got messed up when she started throwing a tantrum when I was changing her on her pad on the bathroom floor, which I had to use since the men's room doesn't have a diaper deck, and she's been teething anyway, so I am running mainly on caffeine, and the last thing I need is someone random biddy telling me that she is sure my wife would be doing a much better job, but it is still "nice" that I am "babysitting" my kids for the day.

(Sorry - that rant was brought to you by the letters "P" and "J", and the number "2")

IMO, diapers got easier once we were on adult food. They stank more, but the blowouts were a lot less frequent. I'd rather change a couple stinky diapers each day than change several diapers, plus the onsies/outfits, plus the sheets, plus clean the carpet, etc.

Now, if I could only get the local "mommy & me" clubs to accept that there is indeed such a creature as a stay-at-home dad, my life would be a lot easier. . .

 

[TwingleMum]

And, on the flip side - ladies, when a guy is taking care of a child: unless he is doing something which clearly constitutes a threat to the child's safety or well-being, back the ($*%$(*&% off!!!!

Sorry, but there is a huge presumption (on the part of both men and women) that a mother's care is always superior to a father's care. The styles are different, in general, but so what? It's not the end of the world if my daughter's hair isn't perfectly braided or her outfit does not match.

Heck, for all you know, she was in a perfectly matched outfit before she had a blowout in her diaper, and her hair got messed up when she started throwing a tantrum when I was changing her on her pad on the bathroom floor, which I had to use since the men's room doesn't have a diaper deck, and she's been teething anyway, so I am running mainly on caffeine, and the last thing I need is someone random biddy telling me that she is sure my wife would be doing a much better job, but it is still "nice" that I am "babysitting" my kids for the day.

(Sorry - that rant was brought to you by the letters "P" and "J", and the number "2")

IMO, diapers got easier once we were on adult food. They stank more, but the blowouts were a lot less frequent. I'd rather change a couple stinky diapers each day than change several diapers, plus the onsies/outfits, plus the sheets, plus clean the carpet, etc.

Now, if I could only get the local "mommy & me" clubs to accept that there is indeed such a creature as a stay-at-home dad, my life would be a lot easier. . .

Great point. My DH is a SAHD and I've bit my tongue lots of times b/c it wasn't how I would do it. If it was really important to me like a holiday or family party I'd lay out the outfits. Fortunately we had 4 boys and they love my Dh's paretning style. I've learned to ignore a little dirt and enjoy the giggles of a get me get me game.

No matter who is taking care of the kids ~ him or me a hug & kiss and "your a great ( Mom or Dad) is PRICELESS.

 

[irishbosoxfan]

I saw this on TMZ last night. Some actor gave this advice.

Offer to change as many diapers as possible before the baby starts eating adult type food. Changing "baby poop" diapers is easy. Changing diapers with "adult poop" not fun.

Ethan Suplee from "My name is Earl"

I loved how he compared baby poop to mustard! I guess he's right but I'd say more Grey Poupon than French's

 

[The Mystery Machine]

This was meant to be HUMOROUS...

Maybe you should start another thread and have a different title?

 

[clovergirl5]

don't 'offer'-JUST DO IT!

i will never understand the concept of some fathers who feel they need to 'offer' in caring for their own children

to 'offer' means to present for acceptance or rejection-LETS GET REAL PEOPLE, if the child has a dirty diaper, needs to be bathed, needs to be fed, needs soothing or supervision it's not something that has the option of rejection. it needs to be done, someone has to do it-and that 'someone' does'nt always have to be the mom.


(off my soapbox now, but i used to get ticked off royaly when the elder females in our lives lavished praise on dh just because he happened to change one diaper when they were around, ignoring the fact that i'de already changed a dozen that day).

I Love the way you think!! I agree 1000%! Gonna show this one to dh

 

[barkley]

And, on the flip side - ladies, when a guy is taking care of a child: unless he is doing something which clearly constitutes a threat to the child's safety or well-being, back the ($*%$(*&% off!!!!

Sorry, but there is a huge presumption (on the part of both men and women) that a mother's care is always superior to a father's care. The styles are different, in general, but so what? It's not the end of the world if my daughter's hair isn't perfectly braided or her outfit does not match.

Heck, for all you know, she was in a perfectly matched outfit before she had a blowout in her diaper, and her hair got messed up when she started throwing a tantrum when I was changing her on her pad on the bathroom floor, which I had to use since the men's room doesn't have a diaper deck, and she's been teething anyway, so I am running mainly on caffeine, and the last thing I need is someone random biddy telling me that she is sure my wife would be doing a much better job, but it is still "nice" that I am "babysitting" my kids for the day.

(Sorry - that rant was brought to you by the letters "P" and "J", and the number "2")

IMO, diapers got easier once we were on adult food. They stank more, but the blowouts were a lot less frequent. I'd rather change a couple stinky diapers each day than change several diapers, plus the onsies/outfits, plus the sheets, plus clean the carpet, etc.

Now, if I could only get the local "mommy & me" clubs to accept that there is indeed such a creature as a stay-at-home dad, my life would be a lot easier. . .

AMEN!!!! and if you want to start a campaign to get restaurants, stores and other places with public restrooms to provide equal accommodations (changing stations) in men's rooms-i will be at the front of the line supporting the cause. this was a huge pet peeve of dh's when our kids were small-we had two in diapers at one point and it never failed-if one had a 'blow out' it created a chain reaction. dh wanted to help out but 9 times out of 10 the men's room had no changing tables

i give kudo's to some buisnesses in our area that now have 'men's', 'women's', and 'FAMILY' restrooms (one stall and 2-3 changing stations)

i agree on the easier diapers with adult food-we were convinced our kid's were radioactive based on some of the diapers they produced when they were on soy formula-it seriously reminded us of the stuff spewing from linda blair in the exorcist. adult food at least came out in a more solid mass.

 

[dejr_8]

Maybe you should start another thread and have a different title?

talk about a thread going south right out of the box

 

[Judy from Boise]

I've found it interesting.....when I read the title, the advice that first popped into my head was "you are a parent, you will never, ever be a babysitter" Embrace and demand your parent power!

 

[Piecey]

And, on the flip side - ladies, when a guy is taking care of a child: unless he is doing something which clearly constitutes a threat to the child's safety or well-being, back the ($*%$(*&% off!!!!

Sorry, but there is a huge presumption (on the part of both men and women) that a mother's care is always superior to a father's care. The styles are different, in general, but so what? It's not the end of the world if my daughter's hair isn't perfectly braided or her outfit does not match.

Heck, for all you know, she was in a perfectly matched outfit before she had a blowout in her diaper, and her hair got messed up when she started throwing a tantrum when I was changing her on her pad on the bathroom floor, which I had to use since the men's room doesn't have a diaper deck, and she's been teething anyway, so I am running mainly on caffeine, and the last thing I need is someone random biddy telling me that she is sure my wife would be doing a much better job, but it is still "nice" that I am "babysitting" my kids for the day.

(Sorry - that rant was brought to you by the letters "P" and "J", and the number "2")

IMO, diapers got easier once we were on adult food. They stank more, but the blowouts were a lot less frequent. I'd rather change a couple stinky diapers each day than change several diapers, plus the onsies/outfits, plus the sheets, plus clean the carpet, etc.

Now, if I could only get the local "mommy & me" clubs to accept that there is indeed such a creature as a stay-at-home dad, my life would be a lot easier. . .

My husband is more likely to put our son in matching clothes than I am!
He doesn't get him ready very often so I think he enjoys deciding whether or not it'll be the robot or the dinosaur that day.

I only dictate certain clothes for pictures and holidays because, for example, he had no idea I had purchased a Christmas outfit.

Start your own group! Call it "Baby & Me" or something, they'll never know a SAHD started it until they get there!

 

[minkydog]

How about this for a piece of advice to new dads:

*When you get home from the hospital do NOT go straight to bed and leave your wife, who is likely feeling kinda beat up, to wrangle the bassinet over to HER side of the bed so that she can get up with the baby every hour all night long because you need your sleep

*And don't even think about going to work for the first few days. At least stay home until your wife can rise from the couch to answer the phone, which is located in the kitchen, before the 25th ring.

*Dad. It is very important that you actually TAKE your leave of absence the first week. Your wife may not be any more comfortable with new baby care than you are and she's doing it with more exhaustion and pain than you imagine. Change the diapers, bring the baby to your wife so she can stay in bed and rest, make her good meals and snacks, and don't you DARE wake her up from a nap to say "I think the baby needs you." Man up! She didn't make that baby by herself.

 

[minkydog]

I agree on the easier diapers with adult food-we were convinced our kid's were radioactive based on some of the diapers they produced when they were on soy formula-it seriously reminded us of the stuff spewing from linda blair in the exorcist. adult food at least came out in a more solid mass.

I agree. I've been changing "adult diapers" for 15 years now and it's MUCH easier to just roll that stuff into the toilet than the drippy sticky mess tht first 6 months.

 

[remyandhollandsmommy]

Do NOT try to get out of changing your daughter's diapers by pulling the "I am a man and it smacks of molestation to touch her there" card..dude, its YOUR child and that BS is NOT going to fly..sorry but a true story with my ex.

Now my new DH, god love him, isn't looking forward to changing our daughter's diapers (he's never been around a baby, but he has "heard some stories" lol), so he went out and bought himself a "kit"..consisting of face mask, armpit length disposible gloves (he got them at the local livestock store ) and a can of febreze. I about died laughing when he showed me, all serious too. I told him I give it a week before he gets sick of putting all that on just to change a diaper LOL.

Oh and he bought himself a makeup mirror to check her breathing with since he watched a health show about SIDS and breathing problems..I now limit his baby show intake. It's totally making him paranoid.

 

[minkydog]

Do NOT try to get out of changing your daughter's diapers by pulling the "I am a man and it smacks of molestation to touch her there" card..dude, its YOUR child and that BS is NOT going to fly..sorry but a true story with my ex.

Now my new DH, god love him, isn't looking forward to changing our daughter's diapers (he's never been around a baby, but he has "heard some stories" lol), so he went out and bought himself a "kit"..consisting of face mask, armpit length disposible gloves (he got them at the local livestock store ) and a can of febreze. I about died laughing when he showed me, all serious too. I told him I give it a week before he gets sick of putting all that on just to change a diaper

Here's a tip from an old nurse: put a dab of toothpaste under the nose before you open the toxic waste container. Even better--use Vicks Vaporub. We keep a container in my son's room, right on the dresser with his diaper materials. Works much better than Febreze

 

[mrsbert]

Once the baby is born, new daddy, it's not about you any longer. From now on, when family and friends come over, they will pass you up and walk straight to the baby. Don't take it personally.

Usually the new mom has switched over to baby mode before the baby is born. It takes the new dad a while to catch up to the idea.

This is not meant to be snarky in any way, it's just that the whole world seemed to be "the couple" and now it's "the family".

Good luck. Breath. You'll survive.