At what age did you let your kids go alone?

[Disney with Triplets]

OK, here's another...

Three families are traveling together on the Magic in December. At the time of sailing, we will have 3 - 6 1/2 year olds, 1 - 7 year old, 1 - 8 year old, and 2 - 13 year olds.

I've read several posts about children leaving dinner to go to the clubs, leaving the pool to go get drinks, leaving dinner to go back to the room and change clothes, leaving the pool for the arcade, etc. At what age did you let your children go from "point A to point B" on the ship without an adult escourt?

This is coming from a Mama Bear that rarely lets her kids (the 6 year olds) go to public restrooms without an adult. I'm pretty sure that the 13 year olds will be checking in with us as they move from spot to spot, but will have a lot of priviledges during the week. I can't really see the 6 - 8 year olds being without constant adult escourt?

I'm not talking about being in an area unsupervised - I'm moreso referring to going to get drinks on the 9th floor, leaving Mom at the pool to go meet Dad in the arcade, leave Dad at the pool to go meet Mom in the room and get dressed for dinner sort of things. I hope this is making sense...

Even as I'm typing this, I'm thinking, "Am I nuts? I'd never let my kids do that by themselves...they're wacko's out there waiting for them..."

 

[challada]

IMHO, no, I would not let the 6-8 crowd go from point A to point B alone...no matter what the points are (ie drinks, pool, etc). Yes, 10-13s can go from one point to another, but I would not let smaller ones do that.

I know I will get flamed for this, but IMHO, DCL is an ideal vacation for child predators....not saying that anything would happen, but you don't want to even give it a chance!

And yes, I work w/kids, have kids and know the statistics...but I would still play it on the safe side!

 

[lbgraves]

ITA with your post. While my kids will be 5 & 7 on our next cruise, I am thinking that MAYBE I will be ok with that when they are 10. It really doesn't take that long for you to walk them down to the club & sign them in. We did it often after asking our server to bring DS's food right away. He was done with desert by 6:45 & I took him down then returned right before our entree was served.

 

[kcashner]

OK, I'm a hyper mom too. At 9, I let DD check herself out of the lab with the stipulation that she go directly to the cabin. She also had the option of asking the counsellor to page me so that I could meet her and we could go wherever.

I gave her this option only because we had a problem on a previous cruise--I was at the lab the stated 15 mintues before an activity move to claim her. She knew that we'd be going to dinner as a family and had told the counsellor that her mom was coming and she didn't want to line up. Well, they lined the kids up and did the head count 20 minutes early (instead of 15 as in the Navigator), and wouldn't let her leave when I got there. Please note that I was more than 15 minutes before the stated moving time. Bottom line, she had to stand in line for 10 minutes, walk up to deck 9, be officially counted and checked in up there, and then (finally) could be checked out and released to me. It took about 30 minutes from the time I arrived till I could get my daughter, and I was on time. I do understand the safety issues, but I also read the Navigator and was there 15 minutes before the move. OK, so a 9, I allowed her to check out so that she could check herself out and go to the cabin just to avoid such a situation again.

At 10, I allowed her to check out and go to the cabin. We had a pad of "sticky notes," and she was to write me a note telling me where she was going. THe rule was that she was in the Lab or I had a note. If she moved from where the note said, she had to leave another (current) note. No biggie--she could just write "Pool."

At 11, I gave her free run of the ship (sort of....) she basically knew where I was and what I was doing, and by that time thought of the ship as "her" vacation home.

In your case, I'd let the teens go on their own, but not the younger ones! The ship is quite safe, but it only takes one nut case.......

 

[westjones]

We have been on 6 cruises (one per year since they were 5 years old). We didn't allow them to check themselves out until they were 11. At that time we also allowed them to go get food and drinks on deck 9 with each other (I have twins, so we have a buddy system).

Our next cruise will be in March 2006, they will be 12 1/2 years old, so I am giving them the freedom to come and go as they like as long as they leave us notes at the room where they will be. I will set a time for them to be at the cabin to get ready for dinner every night.

In your group, I would say the 13 year olds should have freedom to go around the ship, but the rest sound too young to me.

DJ

 

[Jsme]

Oh well this might be another one of those hot topics here. I hope no one gets ugly about it. Anyway I might break out the popcorn as this post gets larger.

I would not give my DD, 11 on our last cruise this option. We had a beeper and to leave by herself she had to call and get an ok by us first. The CM's were fine with this. She called once and asked if she and another girl, who we had not met, could check out and go to the movies. I told her NO. I am definetly a Mama Bear. However, we did allow her and her 10 year old brother to go and get food and drinks while we are at the pool or ice cream.

I feel the same as challada does. This is a perfect place for a child predator to lurk. On the next cruise that they will go on with us, DD will be 13 and DS will be 12. I might lighten up some then. I will have to see how mature they are at this time. Which DD will then be in the teen program and that changes everything.

I can say that you will see plenty of parents not watching their children. We have witnessed a couple go out for the night and party to wee hours in the morning while leaving their room full of kids all alone. The kids were nuts without supervision. They locked one of the others on the balcony. The girls ran up and down the hall screaming. The boys pushed every button in the elevator. Some parents just do not care or seem to realize that kids ARE kids and they tend to act like kids when they do not have an adult around.

Ultimately the decision is yours. If you feel comfortable in letting your children go a small distance by themselves then do. I just think 6 is very young and is it worth the risk of something happening to them? I highly suggest getting some of the two way radio walkie talkie type things to use. This will help the adults in arranging meets. It might even elimate the need to leave the children alone for a little while.

 

[challada]

The only reason I bring up the child predator thing is not to scare anyone or such (most assaults occur between known family members truthfully), but I just got a gut feeling when we were at the end of our cruise about the predator thing...here's the situation that happened:
in the lounge at the auction, my dad got in a conversation w/another gentleman in his age range (you know, the grandparent type)...this guy then proudly boasts that he is booked on the next 12 cruise weeks as well (we were on the 1st west coast)...and no, he doesn't have kids or family w/him. My dad then tells me this info, saying basically,"wow, can you imagine how fat you would get eating this stuff for three months" etc, etc...and my only reaction is...this guy is a predator! Now, he may not be at all, but no matter how much I love a Disney cruise, there is no way I would imagine seeing the same shows, eating the same food, seeing the same ports 13 times! And a single white guy in his late 50s stands out to me as a potential threat. Now the kids would probably view him as a nice grandpa who is just there to help them, but that tends to be how these guys gain trust and then break it.

 

[westjones]

The only reason I bring up the child predator thing is not to scare anyone or such (most assaults occur between known family members truthfully), but I just got a gut feeling when we were at the end of our cruise about the predator thing.

I worry about this too. This is one reason we have decided to always try to book on deck 5 right around from the Lab. We like the SPRs, but if we can't get them, we will get one of the sideways Cat. 11 rooms. I like these halls because they are very short, my girls only have to walk by a couple of other rooms on their way to ours. There seems to be a CM around in that hall almost all the time. And it is only around the corner from the Lab. So when they check out, they don't have to walk by lots and lots of staterooms (it would be easy to open a door and pull someone in).

I have never heard of anything happening on the ship. We have never had any problems, but I just feel better knowing they don't have far to go when they leave the lab. Having twins does help because we have the rule that they have to always be together when they go anywhere.

I am sure I just worry too much. They are my only kids, and well, each stage of growing up creates new challenges for me as a mom to figure out what is alright and what isn't. I have noticed that kids with older siblings get to do things at a much younger age than my girls do. I guess because their older siblings are doing these things. But since I am just winging it as I go, I tend to err on the side of caution.

Anyway, just wanted to mention about deck 5 rooms. It really is nice to have the rooms so close to the Lab for your 10-12 year olds to go back to if you let them sign themselves out.

DJ

 

[lbgraves]

Just in general, I don't think that there is such a thing as being too careful when it comes to the safety of your children. If a child can be harmed in the "safety" of their own home, you need to be on the lookout on a cruise ship, or anywhere else.

 

[got2gp]

Here's my $.02. If you wouldn't allow it at a hotel, why would you on a cruise ship? Having said that, just go with your gut. If it makes you uncomfortable, don't do it.

 

[CaribGirl]

My thing is this is my family vacation and we stick together as a family. Yes, it may have never happened on a cruise, but it takes one nut to start it all. Better be safe than sorry.

 

[Masonpips]

My kids were 5 & 7 on our last cruise and this was the first year (3 cruises) we let DS (7) go from Deck 10 where we were hanging out (over the Mickey pool) to Scoops to get ice-cream and back by himself. Other than that, we were with with the kids every minute except when they were securely checked into the clubs!

I did leave them one evening to run up to Deck 9 to get drinks (we were on Deck 2 forward) and that was huge for me too - to leave them alone in the room! (Dh was off playing bingo or something!)

 

[Jsme]

we will get one of the sideways Cat. 11 rooms.

I have read on another thread about sideways staterooms. Just what are they?

 

[geffric]

After my kids had been on 2 DCL Magic cruises and knew their way around plus being 13 and 10, did I allow them some freedom. However, they had talkabouts and had to tell me when they were changing locations. They had to call when they left and when they got to the new location. DH laughs at me about the "kid freedom" 'cause I was constantly walking by where they were and checking on them. LOL We also call them, when we were changing locations,( same called when we were leaving and when we got there ) so that they knew where we were.


They also had a set time as to when they had to be back at the room to get ready for dinner and a curfew in the night.

 

[Vanvmom]

About the sideways rooms, most cabins have doors on the end of a lengthwise room (perpendicular to the hallway). Some cabins however have doors on the side of a room that runs parallel to the hallway.

As for the topic of roaming alone...

My 11 1/2 year old (a mature/rules following kid that is sometimes mistaken for being older I might add) check himself in and out of the lab, WITH RULES. He had to let me know where he was going and he had to keep his 9 year old brother with him. I knew with confidence that I could trust my oldest son to make good decisions. They could not be at the pool without an adult in our group being with them, and they could not just wander the ship. They also never went into the arcade. Too many other fun things to do without spending arcade money.

Some DIS people we met had problems during our cruise with kids in their hallway writing rude things on their dry erase board and stealing their door magnets. I agree that some kids will get into mischeif when their parents are not supervising them (and... what if these "fun" kids are the ones your child chooses to hang out with in their free time).

Everyone knows their own level of parenting confidence, and what the maturity level of their kids is. I was comfortable with the limitations I gave my two oldest children on the ship. That said, I would not consider letting them roam around DL alone.

 

[westjones]

I have read on another thread about sideways staterooms. Just what are they?

There is a group of Cat. 11 rooms on Deck 5 that have the door open up in front of the couch. Then on one side is the bed and the other side is the bathroom. Most of the rooms open and the room goes back longways from there (passing the bath to get to the bed).

These Cat. 11 rooms seemed a little bigger than the other Cat. 11s and they had a steamer trunk in them (which wasn't in the other Cat. 11s we stayed in). The room numbers for these rooms on deck 5 are:

5001
5005
5009
5013
5501
5505
5509
5513

And I believe there are some on Deck 6 also (I haven't seen them):
6003
6007
6011
6015
6019
6503
6507
6511
6515
6521

I like the hall in deck 5 because it has very few rooms (so it is quiet with little traffic) and it is right around the hall from the Kids Lab. The Movie theater isn't far either, and the Walt Disney Theater is just down the stairs by this hall.

DJ

 

[westjones]

Go to the Deck Plans link at the top of the page (or click on this):

http://www.wdwinfo.com/wdwinfo/cruise-new/cr-deckplans.htm#

and you can see where these rooms are located.

DJ

 

[AspiringCindy]

Honestly, I am a little uncomfortable about letting my Girls have some freedom on our upcoming cruise in November. During our cruise, they will be 11 1/2 and (will just have turned) 13 year old. I want to give them some space...maybe to go back to cabin by themselves or get food by the pool...but to do their own thing...I don't think so! I am even checking the 13 year old into the Lab with her sister even though she will be 13!...she agrees!

 

[logan1_2000]

Probably no one answer to fit all (safe to say, though, that a 5 year old should not be unescorted, for example), but if the parents use the same instincts as at a mall, park, WDW, stadium, hotel, beach, then that is probably the right course of action for that family. Sometimes it isn't even the risk of the predator issue, but something more likely to happen, like a child simply becoming disoriented/lost and upset that I would want to avoid most--its vacation and I want all the children on baord to have a fun time w/o tears.

I've weighed in on this on other threads, and I know our own experience w/ DS has resulted in him having more freedom than some others, but we have rules, limits, and I test him and run through scenarios for what to do or where to go in many different circumstances, and given his own maturity we feel it is appropriate. But every case is individual, and parents know best (or at least what lets them rest easy and assured).

 

[westjones]

Honestly, I am a little uncomfortable about letting my Girls have some freedom on our upcoming cruise in November. During our cruise, they will be 11 1/2 and (will just have turned) 13 year old. I want to give them some space...maybe to go back to cabin by themselves or get food by the pool...but to do their own thing...I don't think so! I am even checking the 13 year old into the Lab with her sister even though she will be 13!...she agrees!

You may feel more comfortable after all of you get use to the cruise. We would let our girls go to movies together, but we walked them down, and met them when it was over. It does help having a 'buddy system' like you are going to have with your two girls.

We didn't let ours go to the pool by themselves. We did let them leave the Lab to go back to our room (which was on Deck 5 right around the corner from the Lab), but then we would get a page telling us they went back to the room and we would go meet them or call the room to tell them we would be there soon.

You will figure it out as you go. Don't worry about it. Once you are on board, set down some strict rules and if you feel more comfortable over time, you can relax them a little. In the evenings, our girls were with us all the time or in the Lab. We didn't let them go up on deck 9 at night, but we did let them go together to get a pop if they wanted to bring it back to the room.

DJ