Aspie refuses to go on wdw trip - what do i do?

[buzz for boys]

I know im always turning to you guys but im really hoping someone has experienced this and can offer some advice.
My ds is 7 and has aspergers we were planning on surprising him with a trip to wdw to celebrate his birthday but changed our minds when I reaalised that would prob really upset him *** he would not get the chance to read and plan wht he wanted to do.
So we told all 4 of ourkids that we were going back the 3 kids were so excited but ds was screaming and had a meltdown about not wanting to go. He even said he would stay at home by himself instead of going.
This morning i asked him calmly why he didnt want to go and offered to help him rresearch on the net and he said it was a dumb idea all you get to do is rides and then go home for a sleep every day.
what do i do ??? cancelling the trip is not an option *** everyone else is really looking forward to it!!
Any ideas???

 

[Tissa]

I'm thinking to just give him time. Kids always change their minds once they see everyone getting excited about going. Maybe ask him to help you with planning because he is so good at it or something like that. Ask him what would make the trip more exciting for the others?

I'm having the same problem with my ds but it is over going to the UK. He can not understand why we would go there and not Disneyworld.

 

[KirstenB]

Does he like swimming in the pools? Or playing on the playground at the resort? I know it seems ridiculous to fly all the way over here, and not go to the parks, but maybe you and your dh could trade off doing quieter activities with your son, while the other one takes the rest of the kids to the park. If he were older, I'd say let him stay home with someone. But seeing as he's only 7, I bet he'd miss you, and maybe regret his decision.

 

[buzz for boys]

I'm having the same problem with my ds but it is over going to the UK. He can not understand why we would go there and not Disneyworld.

I have to agree with your ds on that 1 why would you pick the uk over disneyworld???

 

[mechurchlady]

I have SID so for me I can understand how your son has just went into overload. You will need to read the Aspie and autism threads for tips. Also what type of kid is he? Does he have to have everything in order? Is there stuff he really loves like Buzz Lightyear, Star Wars, or food? Is he hyposensitive to anything or maybe hypersensitive? Those things will help you to build a devious plan that will get the kid to want to go to WDW or at least Florida, lol.

I am not sure what will work since I do not know the kid that well. Some things help is role playing, stories, making itineraries with pictures to show the whole trip in general, watching videos, and trip planning. If he does not want to go then how about the family plan the trip and watch videos on youtube as eventually he might get curious as he lets his guard down. Also with sensory issues he may not like rides or noise of the parks or what every. Maybe something at the parks is scaring him or making him uncomfortable.

Mom wants dinner so I leave you with hugs and happy thoughts.
laurie

 

[DisDreaminMom]

Get him a big stack of Disney planning books from the library or the bookstore. What about a Deluxe Passporter, with the pen and binder? Then tell him you NEED him to help you plan what to do for a certain few days of the trip. Tell him that you just don't know what you will do without his help. Let him pick park, restaurants (I don't know how far away the trip is, so keep in mind the ADR thing- please!!!) and rides you go on. Even if DH takes the other kids to do their own thing and you go with DH on "his" planned days, then this will give him ownership of trip and make it his.

Or to get even more manipulative, let other kids have a "day" to plan first and give THEM the books and tell him he can't since he doesn't want to go anyway. This would make my DS(6) practically grovel to be the one to get to do this. Just tell other kids the plan first, so there isn't WWIII. I know my DD (8) is getting super good at figuring this kind of thing out. Is she becoming a crafty manipulator? Yeah, but she'll be a great lawyer some day.

Good luck. I hope DS someday understands what a great family he has- what with the TORTURE of going to WDW and all...

 

[bookwormde]

If his reaction was very strong and immediate; I would guess that there was one of more very specific items that made him anxious. It could be the trip to and from or some very specific item at WDW.
I would create a list of all the “new” or “not done very often” items which are included in the trip, try have him rate them on a 1 to 10 scale from 1 being terrifying to 10 being the most fun thing in the world.
It usually does not take long to focus in on one or 2 general areas which are a problem and then you can get into much more detail in those areas to get the one or set of very specific concerns. This will take some time so hopefully you are still more than a couple of weeks from leaving. The other good thing about this approach is you will identity areas that he considers fun so you can emphasize those.

Sometimes it is just a matter of having enough time for the idea to settle in

bookwormde